Dead Wrong
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the canon characters; they belong to Dreamworks Studios. No monetary gain is being made from this story. Written for the prompt given to me by my sister: "Well, I just assumed."
"Well, that's where you get into trouble, now isn't it?"
Tulio vows that he is never going to leave Miguel alone or to his own devices. No way. No how. Never again. Currently, Miguel and Tulio are both sprinting through the rainforest, screaming for all the world like little girls having a nightmare.
"This is all your fault, Miguel!" Tulio practically roars, fear evident on the dark-haired Spaniard's face as he leaps over a fallen tree, scraping his palms in the process.
"Well, I just assumed…." Miguel begins to defend himself as he catches up to Tulio, his blonde hair practically swaying in the wind as the musician does his best to stay ahead of the beast that is chasing them.
"Well, that's where you get into trouble, now isn't it? You still don't have a little voice in your head, even after all the years we've known each other!" Tulio bites back, that usual sarcastic tone in his voice that he usually reserves for Miguel when the younger man does something absolutely stupid.
"I thought it was a baby, Tulio! And I also thought that it was injured and needed my help!" Miguel tries to defend himself, catching sight of spots in the near distance as the creature circles behind Tulio before continuing to race beside Miguel.
"Well, clearly, Mr. Empty Cabeza, the jaguar chasing us is not a baby, nor is she injured!" Tulio bites back, pulling Miguel through the thick foliage to try and throw off the jaguar racing behind them. "She's clearly just hungry for two Spaniards! So, your assessment of her age and health were clearly dead wrong, amigo!" the more practical of the two men yells, slipping underneath a low-hanging tree branch before then vaulting into the shelter back at camp, roughly grabbing Miguel's forearm and tugging the blonde-Spaniard inside the shelter.
Before Miguel can scream in that high-pitched squeal of his, Tulio clamps one of his deeply calloused hands over his best friend's mouth, placing one finger over his own lips in order to silence Miguel. Instead, the younger of the two men starts to softly hyperventilate, unsure of whether or not the jaguar stalking them is smart enough or stealthy enough to find them hiding in the temporary shelter they are staying in for the night. Hopefully Altivo is still out with Chel where the jaguar does not think it can have a horse appetizer and an entrée consisting of the two men who discovered the mysterious city of El Dorado. And Chel…. Tulio would much rather not think about what would happen were Chel to meet the ferocious jaguar since the fateful night where Tzekel-Kan nearly killed the populace of El Dorado with a massive, possessed stone jaguar had invaded her dreams on many a stormy night since. Oh, great. Now Tulio's mind is racing just thinking about that night, almost seeing both Chel and Miguel die… Almost losing Miguel as a best friend for all eternity just for saying that he was going to go back to Spain without the blonde guitarrista… Tulio shudders at the memory and dares to take a peek outside the shelter, looking for any traces of the jaguar, praying that the carnivore has left the area and has decided to not take revenge on the kind-hearted Miguel who merely was concerned for the animal's health and safety.
They're in luck. Slowly, Tulio removes his hand from Miguel's mouth, still making a shushing movement to convince Miguel not to scream in pure terror, lest the hungry and fearsome jaguar return to try and make a meal out of the two men after all.
"She's gone," Tulio whispers in complete relief, and the brown-eyed Spaniard hears Miguel sigh in gratitude next to him.
"We barely escaped that one, huh?" Miguel rhetorically inquires, a small amount of guilt crossing his facial features, but mostly a look of relief at the thought that neither he nor Tulio would become jaguar chow that night.
"I wonder why," Tulio dryly comments, and it's all Miguel can do not to engage Tulio in another argument about how Tulio is tired of having to remind Miguel that they are not actual deities like they pretended to be in El Dorado.
They only have one mortal life to lead, and Miguel doesn't need to risk his to try and help every animal he sees in the jungle when the three humans and one horse decide to stop and make camp for the night. Something scrambling in the bushes outside the shelter catches Miguel's attention, causing his emerald eyes to widen significantly.
"What was that noise?" he whispers, and Tulio, much like Miguel, is starting to get increasingly anxious and worried.
"I don't know. I was going to ask you the same question," Tulio admits, concern lacing his face as his lips move into a grimace just at the mere thought of all the creatures out there that could kill them.
"Well, I asked you first, didn't I?"
"Yes, you did, but just because you asked first doesn't mean that I'm going to mysteriously learn the answer! Now, does it?"
Suddenly, without any form of warning whatsoever, the flap of the shelter is pulled back, and both Miguel and Tulio scream bloody murder in the same squeamish, feminine squeals they had upon seeing Tzekel-Kan's possessed jaguar statue for the first time.
Chel's laughter quickly fills the expanse of the shelter, and Altivo's taunting style of whinnying accompanies the native woman's laughter as she pulls back the flap of the shelter to find two cowering men looking as if the shock alone could have aged them ten years.
"What are you two scaredy-cats doing in here?" Chel giggles, depositing the jug of water and basket of fruit on the small makeshift table Tulio crafted out of a piece of sturdy wood.
"Not cool, Chel! Not cool at all!" Tulio exasperatedly sighs, wrapping his arms around his girlfriend and kissing her on the cheek, making her hum contentedly while leaning into his chest.
"Why? What happened?" she inquires, still not sure why both Tulio and Miguel seem to appear as if they've seen a ghost or the cause of their downfall.
"Why don't you tell her, Miguel?" Tulio insists, his chocolate eyes filled with mirth and mischief as he calls out the green-eyed, blonde-haired Spaniard. "Since all of this was technically your fault, after all," he continues, placing the blame solely on Miguel, and Miguel can't really argue with that since he was the one responsible for making a jaguar chase them through the forest and back to camp.
"I may have sort of awoken a jaguar who then decided she needed to chase us through the jungle and back to camp to try and make us her dinner for the night," Miguel admits, lowering his head, not wanting to meet Chel's gaze, knowing she would most likely laugh or judge him.
"And how did that happen?" Chel asks instead, and it's a welcome alternative from what Miguel thought was going to be said.
"Well, I thought that she was a baby and injured, because she was holding one of her paws crooked underneath her, and I just felt terrible, Chel, because she looked so skinny and alone," Miguel tells his own version of the story, and coming from the dreamer of the two men Chel has found herself allied with, the story makes more sense told from Miguel's point of view. "If she had actually been a baby, I would have brought her back to camp with me, and we could have taken care of her and raised her into a happy, healthy adult," he reveals the rest of his plan to Chel, and Tulio is taken aback by the last part.
"Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait a minute!" Tulio shouts out, closing his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose with his thumb and index finger. "Your plan was for us three to take in and raise a jaguar into a dangerous predator?!" he demands an answer, looking almost as if he could strangle Miguel for merely thinking of the idea.
"Well, sure! We would have raised her, and then she would have been on our side if we ever needed the extra help in the occasion of combat and…"
"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard! Maybe she'd be on our side! Highly unlikely, Miguel. Highly unlikely. I'd settle just for Altivo liking me before you get any more of your wild schemes to integrate a predator into our lives!"
"That could be arranged…"
It's at that moment that Tulio flings himself forward, totally prepared to tackle his best friend and brother figure to the ground and then give him the longest lecture of his life.
"Not so fast, Tulio!" Chel intervenes, popping up in front of Tulio and grabbing his vest to anchor him to one spot before also wrapping one of her mocha-colored arms around Miguel's neck, pulling them both to a stop. "We can talk about this some other time, particularly when we're not all starving since we had a small lunch. Now, I need Miguel to start dicing up the fruits that I found where we can have a salad, and Tulio, you're on meat duty," she reveals, divvying up tasks for the two Spaniards to accomplish.
"And what will you be working on, Chel?" Tulio questions, reaching out to try and run his hand through Chel's raven locks, only to get hit with a wooden spoon.
"I'm going to get more water to use as a stock for the soup. Then after that, I'm relaxing with Altivo until you boys finish the prep work," Chel smirks, running out of the shelter and picking up a rather large jug before heading off in the direction of the river.
"Well, I guess Chel's in charge."
"Did you ever doubt that she was, Tulio?"
Now Miguel is the one who gets smacked with the wooden spoon.
"I still haven't forgiven you for earlier, Miguel."
"I didn't believe you had. You tend to hold grudges for an indefinite amount of time, amigo."
Author's Note: And there it is! My first Road to El Dorado story! I have to admit, this movie came out the year I was born, and in the past three years, I have fallen in love with it all over again! I've been meaning to write some stories for the fandom for a while now, but I just now found the inspiration to, especially when my sister texted me the prompt. I am not ashamed to admit that I immediately thought of Miguel and Tulio for that dialogue. Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed this one-shot; all reviews are certainly welcomed and appreciated! Until next time, my dear readers! Have an amazing day, afternoon, or night! :)