AN: 'Ello, It's GrapeFuzzBatt! This story is my latest brainchild and I just had to get it into writing so I'm publishing the first chapter now to make up for my very, very long hiatus with my other fics. They're on my to do list, trust me! I've just got a rather full plate at the moment. Anyways, another crossover surprise surprise. I recently discovered the wonderful meme-tastic game of Portal and its delicious cake (that is a lie). ^^ and Kingdom Hearts is just easy to cross things with, so...I just had to do it. XD Much more straightforward and less confusing crossover this time compared to my Resident Evil one. I actually preserved both continuities instead of just sticking the characters of one continuity into the setting of the other. So it'll be much less confusing that way. Yay! And my main reason for writing this is that there needs to be more Portal fanfiction. For the game being so popular, there are way too few fics of it. R and R plz k thnx! And Happy Holidays! ^.^
Disclaimer: Kingdom Hearts belongs to Square Enix and Disney, and Portal belongs to Valve. I am making no attempt to profit from this fan-based work of literature.
There Will Be Cake
Chapter 1
"Sora! Sora! We got a message from Leon in Radiant Garden! It's really important!" Chip and Dale squeaked as they ran through cockpit of the Gummi Ship, carrying a piece of paper. Currently the ship was on auto-pilot while Sora, Donald, and Goofy took some time to relax, but when Chip and Dale came tearing through the room Sora was pulled away from his brief period of rest. He turned in his seat to watch Chip and Dale scurry across the floor and hop up onto the control panel of the cockpit so that they could speak to him face to face. "What is it guys? What's going on?" He asked.
Chip handed Sora the paper. "The Restoration Committee says they need help, and fast!"
"Leon's in trouble?" Sora took the paper from the hysterical chipmunks. He read it aloud so Donald and Goofy would know what was going on as well.
"Sora, Donald, and Goofy:
We've got some major problems with our computer system. Get to Radiant Garden ASAP and we'll fill you in on the details.
-Leon"
"Computer problems?" Donald repeated.
"Gawrsh, do ya think maybe Tron is in some kind of danger?" Goofy asked.
"I don't know, but we've got to find out." Sora answered, and he switched auto-pilot off and took the controls, steering the Gummy Ship towards Radiant Garden.
~*~*~*~*~*~
Upon landing in Radiant Garden, they hurried towards Merlin's house. There were barely any heartless along the way, making the trip swift and easy, but a little unusual since normally the place was packed with them. They reached Merlin's house and found Cid, Aerith, Yuffie and Merlin gathered around the computer, Cid typing furiously.
Sora announced their arrival to the others. "Hey, we came here as fast as we could. What seems to be the problem?"
They all turned to see them and Yuffie bolted over and dragged them towards the computer. "Thank goodness you're here! We need all the help we can get right now. Since you guys are committee members, we contacted you first."
Once they got a good look at the computer, they noticed it was drastically different than the last time they'd been there. Everything had been replaced: the computer monitor was now a sleek, flat plasma screen mounted on the wall instead of the big bulky monitor that had been there before. Cid sat at a desk with a glass top, there were several different keyboards layered on shelves, and there was even a mouse this time. Everything looked brand new and pristine, as opposed to the very old and outdated looking equipment they had there before.
"Whoa, is all this new?" Donald asked.
"Sure is." Cid answered. We upgraded the town's entire computer system, even the one in Ansem's place. But now, it's giving us all sorts of trouble. The defense mechanism's gone haywire, all the construction equipment is either completely shut down or goes crazy and starts wrecking the place when we turn it on, and the power system is all messed up…half the town doesn't have any power and it switches on and off at random. We've got a real mess on our hands this time."
"Wait…you replaced all the computers?" Sora asked apprehensively. "Does that mean Tron is gone?"
"No, we had him backed up onto a storage system for insurance in case something went wrong with the new computer." Aerith answered. "He himself recommended we update Radiant Garden's computer system to make the reconstruction more efficient, since most of his equipment was really old."
"But this new computer is giving us more problems than we can shake a stick at!" Merlin interjected.
"Well then, why don'tcha just load Tron back up and see if he can help fix this new computer?" Goofy suggested.
"That'd be too risky." Cid replied. "This computer ain't no pushover. It's got security systems all over the place that even I'm having a tough time getting through. We're afraid that if we try to load Tron into this one, it would start eating up his functions and trying to integrate him into its mainframe. Turn him over to the other side, so to speak."
"Yeah…that would be bad." said Sora. "But then…what should we do? I don't think me, Donald or Goofy know the first thing when it comes to fixing computers."
A familiar voice came from the front door. "Don't worry, I've got something you can help us with." They turned to see Leon standing behind them. He went over to Sora and the others.
"Any luck?" Aerith asked him.
"None. She's still being quite stubborn…every command I give her is pretty much ignored." Leon replied.
Sora raised an eyebrow at the mention of the word "she". Who is this "she" Leon was referring to? He exchanged questioning looks with Donald and Goofy, and they just shrugged.
"Well, we'll keep working here. You can take these three and show them what needs to be done." Aerith replied.
"Alright then. Sora, Donald, Goofy…come with me." Leon told them. They obeyed and followed him as they left Merlin's house. Leon was leading them up to the castle, presumably to Ansem's study where the master computer was, but along the way they noticed that the town appeared to be in worse condition than it was before. More debris and wreckage was scattered in the streets, and many of the structures that had been repaired before were now much more destroyed. The bailey was especially in terrible condition; at least there were stairs before even though most of it wasn't in very good shape, but now the stairs were reduced to rubble and they had to use a ladder to get down.
They arrived at the castle and passed through Ansem's study to the master computer room. Everything in here was different as well. There were now multiple computer screens suspended above a very large curved keyboard that had hundreds of keys at the least. Sora had thought the big computer that was there before was complicated enough, but he didn't know how anyone was supposed to operate this one. All the computer screens displayed different things, some of them flashing random images, And the gigantic device that they used to travel to Tron's world that had been on the wall behind them was no longer there either. Now most of it was just a plain wall, with some tall computer towers where the data conversion device had been. There were some cameras mounted in the corners of the ceilings, and Sora had seen some of the same cameras throughout the town on the way here as well.
"Well boys," Leon said, "I'd like you to meet our new computer. Say hello, GLaDOS."
There was some static coming from the speaker system, and then a robotic and monotone, yet melodic female voice filled the room. "Hello. I am the Aperture Science Enrichment Center master control Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System. You may call me GLaDOS."
Sora, Donald and Goofy were all a little perplexed, but nonetheless they introduced themselves to the new computer.
"Uh…hi…GLaDOS. You can call me Sora."
"I'm Donald Duck!"
"And my name's Goofy."
"It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance—subject name here—we hope we can be of assistance with anything you may need." GLaDOS replied.
Sora, Donald, and Goofy simply tilted their heads in confusion when she failed to repeat their names. They exchanged baffled expressions, shrugs, and shook their heads to each other.
"Alright now that we've got the formalities out of the way, we've got work to do guys. There's still a lot that needs to be explained." Leon said.
"I'll say," Sora replied, "let's start with where you guys got this computer."
"Tron suggested we check with the company that made his computer and all the programs and see if they had any newer models available, but when we looked we found out that Encom had been shut down several years ago due to some suspicious activity. But then Cid found an advertisement for a really advanced computer from this company called Aperture Science on the internet. He's the technology expert and said it was the best thing he'd seen yet, so we ordered and installed this new system, and now…well…guess where that got us." Leon explained.
"Technology expert my foot. He ordered a screwy computer!" Donald scoffed.
"I take offense to that comment. My functions are all functioning at their optimal performance." GLaDOS said, to their astonishment. This managed to silence any more remarks about GLaDOS from Donald.
"Actually, when we first got the system up and running, everything was working pretty smoothly." Leon said. "The reconstruction process was being run a lot more efficiently. It only started malfunctioning a few hours ago. You saw for yourself the results…the bailey was almost completely destroyed and the power blacked out before we were able to get a handle on things."
Sora put his hands on his hips and raised an eyebrow towards the camera on the ceiling, speaking to GLaDOS. "So what's the deal then, GLaDOS? If you're functions are…er…functioning so well, then why aren't you working?"
"What are you talking about?" GLaDOS replied. "I'm working just fine. There is absolutely nothing wrong with me. Nothing whatsoever."
"Huh?!"
"It's no use talking to her." Leon told Sora. "Trust me…we've tried."
"And didn't ya say earlier that she won't listen to your commands either?" Goofy asked.
"Yeah. Every command I give her through the keyboard responds with an error message." Leon continued. "It either says 'access denied', or it tells me 'the disk is write protected' or I need 'proper authorization'. We don't have any idea where to find access codes or passwords either, because it's not like we can get them from Ansem's study this time. We tried to find some contact information from Aperture Science so we could get some tech support, but we couldn't even get into their website."
"Wow…this sounds like one heck of a situation." Sora said. "What are we going to do then?"
"Well…the best thing we can come up with to do is to find out where the main headquarters of this Aperture Science place is. Then we have to get a hold of someone who works there and see if they can help us. It's their computer after all…someone's bound to know how it works. That's where we were hoping you guys would come in." Leon said.
"You want us to find out where this place is? But how would we know where to start? I've never even heard of Aperture Science." said Sora.
"You think maybe it's in another world?" Donald suggested.
"That's a possibility." Leon replied.
"It could take ages then…we've been to pretty much every world we know of and never heard anything about a place called 'Aperture Science'. And who knows where we would find a completely uncharted new world." Sora said pessimistically.
Leon sighed. "Look, I know it doesn't sound like the greatest plan ever, but it's really all we've got at this point. We're out of options."
Just then, GLaDOS interrupted them. "If you wish to travel to the main headquarters of Aperture Science, I can be of some assistance."
They all looked either at the computer screens or towards the ceiling as she spoke. "Really? You can?" Sora asked her doubtfully.
"This is the first time you've offered to help us at all since you started malfunctioning." Leon said with his arms crossed in suspicion. "What's the catch?"
"What do you mean?" GLaDOS replied. "I can provide a transport to the Aperture Science Enrichment Center if that is what you desire."
"What do you think Leon? She's offering to take us there." Sora said to the older man. "It may be the only way we can find this place."
Leon furrowed his brow in thought momentarily. "Guess you're right." He said. "Alright then…go ahead, GLaDOS."
"Deploying transport in three…two…one."
Just then, a hole appeared in the wall behind them, big enough for a full grown person to fit through, and the edges of it were glowing with an orange light. The four of them eyed it suspiciously and looked at each other, and then Goofy approached it cautiously and examined it.
"The Enrichment Center assures you that the transport is one hundred percent safe, and you will not suffer any gruesome injuries or death from passing through it." GLaDOS told them.
Goofy experimentally put one of his hands through the hole and took it back out. When it came out unscathed, he turned back towards the others and said "Gawrsh fellas, seems like its okay."
Sora and Donald approached the hole alongside Goofy. "What is it?" Sora asked, fascinated.
"It looks like it's a…um…a…a portal!" Donald exclaimed.
"Yeah, you're right Donald! You can see through to the other side." said Sora. And indeed they could see what was on the other side. It looked like a room in a laboratory of some kind: the room was brightly lit and every surface was immaculate. One by one, the three boys stepped through the portal to the other side. They looked around in their new environment, and discovered that they were actually in a very boring room. Nothing was in it except a floor, walls, a ceiling, and another one of those cameras. There was also something printed on one of the walls in big gray letters: the words "Aperture Science Enrichment Center" next to what appeared to be the company's logo: a circular design.
"Guess this is it." Sora said. "See you when we get back Leon—" He turned to say farewell to Leon, only to discover there was nothing behind him but a wall. The portal had disappeared. "Hey…the portal's gone."
"There's no doors in this room…how are we supposed to find anyone if we can't get out?" Donald said.
"Gee guys…I've got a bad feeling about this now." Said Goofy uneasily.
"Welcome to the Aperture Science Enrichment Center. We apologize for the inconvenience of your current location. Please standby and a navigational associate will arrive shortly to escort you to the main level of the Enrichment Center." GLaDOS informed them.
"Well how is this 'associate' going to get to us? There are no doors in here." Sora said doubtfully.
"Maybe another portal will open up when they get here." Goofy hypothesized.
Instead of a portal opening however, there were some panels that opened up in the wall near the ceiling, and a peculiar looking device emerged from behind the panels. Then they heard a faint hissing sound.
"What's that noise?" Donald asked.
"It's coming from those things!" Sora exclaimed, pointing to the devices.
"I feel kind of…drowsy all of a sudden." Donald said, his eyelids beginning to droop.
"Me too." said Goofy, his posture becoming a bit slouched and wobbly.
"Guys…I think we're being gassed…with sleeping gas." Sora said, but Donald and Goofy had collapsed on the floor unconscious by the time he finished the sentence. He also was beginning to feel drowsy, but he being bigger than Donald and Goofy was able to withstand the effects of the sleeping gas a bit longer. He stumbled over to the wall and tried to support himself as his vision slowly began to close in with blackness, and then he slid to the floor, unconscious and slumped against the wall.