"C'mon please!"
"No, go away I hate you!"
"But everything is so boring without you."
"Too bad."
"You can't possibly tell me that you don't have fun when we go out."
"We have very different ideas of fun."
"No we don't, you know you love it!"
"We spent 8 months in jail!"
"Pfft."
"You can't just pfft 8 months in jail away!"
"We've been alive for over 800 fucking years, what's 8 months? Plus that was like 200 years ago."
"I hate you."
"You said that already."
"It's still true."
"If you don't go with me, I'll do something stupid."
"If I do, you'll convince me to do something stupid!"
"That's kinda the point, B."
"Don't call me that, you know I hate it."
"Fine, Buffy. Please!"
"That's not even my name anymore, go away!"
"If I guess your new name will you go with me?"
"Why would I agree to that?"
"You're just as bored as I am, we're all each other has!"
"That's not true, I have Simon."
"Who the fuck is Simon?"
"This is Simon."
"A fucking squirrel? What the hell is wrong with you? Why do you have a squirrel in your pocket?"
"He's my friend!"
"So you're completely insane."
"Oh yes, completely."
"Stop with the squirrel, you're not supposed to have a squirrel in your pocket!"
"Leave me alone!"
"Oh my god, it's fucking dead. B, you're carrying around a dead squirrel."
"No! Don't you dare say he's dead! You're dead."
"How is it that I am the one who stayed sane all this time."
"You were never sane to begin with."
"I never carried dead things around in my pocket! Gimmie that thing."
"Stay away! I'll punch you!"
"Of course you will, and I'll punch you back. It will be a festival of punches. I'm taking it, it's falling apart anyway."
"I hate you."
"Stop pouting, you can get another one, they're all over the place."
"Simon was special."
"I bet. C'mon, just come out with me. It will be fun!"
"You haven't guessed my name yet."
"Joan?"
"I hate you!"
"You love me!"
"No, you're stupid and mean."
"Just come on."
"I think the lady said she doesn't want to go."
"Dude, seriously. You don't want to get in the middle of this."
"Maybe I do."
"What do you think, B? Do you want this guy's help?"
"Yep, you're bothering me. The nice man should save me from you."
"You know he's a vampire, right?"
"Of course I do, I'm insane, not blind."
"OK then, she's all yours."
"Faith!"
"What? I thought you hated me?"
"Um, I'm just gonna go."
"But you were going to save me! Don't be like that!"
"I just realized I gotta go is all…"
"You just figured out who we are. What's the matter? Scared?"
"Awww, you made him run away."
"Guess I better go take care of him."
"Don't."
"What? Since when are you OK with letting vampires go?"
"I just don't want you to go. I forgot how nice it was to have you around."
"I'll come right back."
"No."
"No? Now you're telling me no? Ugh, stop pouting. Fine, I'll stay with you. Can we at least go somewhere else? It's cold and smells like dead squirrel."
"Simon!"
"Fucking hell."