"Umm... hello. Hello and welcome to this next year at Hogwarts. Perhaps this year it will be less tragedy filled..." Albus croaked, waving his arms like a lunatic. He was tired. He had spent the night trying to keep Severus Snape from committing suicide and had gotten no sleep. He was ready to perform "Avada Kedavra" on the annoying little first year who wouldn't fucking stop his annoyingly high pitched cough.
Snape, on the other hand, was sitting at his spot on the faculty table looking particularly smug, as being complimented by Albus Dumbledore for 12 hours straight on looks and intelligence will leave a person next on death row laughing and giggling and wringing their hands with delight.
Albus made up some bullshit off the top of his head in a melodic tune comparing the wonders of Hogwarts to the croak of a bullfrog and the egg of a dragon. He noticed the Potter boy singing loudly to this really pathetic excuse for a song, his eyes closed and his mouth open. Stupid Potter. What the fuck is he doing?Albus thought. Harry openned his eyes and looked at Albus and gave a pathetic little smile as if to say "Thank you for always being there for me, Headmaster."
Albus hid his grimace and winked at Harry. Even though he was going into his seventh year, Harry looked like a scrawny retard as he always did. He couldn't believe that this child held the future of their entire world. What he didn't tell Harry was that if Voldemort were to defeat him, he would open up the mouth of all hells and condemn everyone to them. Harry had approximately fifteen days to live before his and Voldemort's fate were put on line with one another.
What Albus really needed was a Slayer... a Vampire Slayer with the strength to fight the vampires, demons, and forces of evil.