Dead man Duo is a fan fiction continuation of the novel by SE Hinton. This is a work of fiction. This author does not own the characters, only the story.
The unidentified flying man came in low from the southeast this time and buzzed over their heads.
"Hey!" shouted Cherry. "Stop that incessant buzzing!"
Johnny Cade came reluctantly in for a landing, tripped over the tops of the lilacs and bowled into the rest of the gang. Darry and Ponyboy went rolling down the hill and into the lake. And then in a shocking twist of plot that surprised everyone, Dallas Winston rose from the lake, moss covering his arms and water pouring from every orifice carrying both brothers in his emaciated hands. He threw the horsekid down and then proceded to give Darry the breath of life.
"Gack! Son of a toad," said Darry, coughing and vomiting back into Dallases foul throat. "I, augh!" he shouted again. "Never do that!"
Dallas swallowed and hung his head. "Shucks," he said, "I just wanted to help."
Then he looked at Ponyboy and started moving toward him. "See?" he said to the horrified and disgusted gang, "I'll just show you on the weenie what I was trying to do. I wasn't trying to kiss you, Darry, honest I wasn't"
"Oh no you don't," said Darry, sitting up now. He rolled swiftly and got his hands under Ponyboy before Dallas could reach him. He began to pick up the comatose little buddy and then shot an angry look Two Bit's way. "Don't just stand there gaping," he said, "help me."
"I'm not going to kiss him!"
"Shut up, Dally! Just shut up!"
Darry and Two Bit carried Ponyboy up the bank while Johnny distracted Dally by levitating around his mossy head. Dally spun confusedly on his heel, swatting at the flying contraption. "Stop it! Stop it," he said. His voice didn't sound the same as Johnny remembered, kind of phlegmy like, as if someone was talking with their throat stuffed with cigars and raw bacon strips.
"Hey, Dally!" Johnny shouted, staring down at him. "What are you doing here?" It didn't make any sense to see him here at the lake. "The cops shot you. You died. We went to your funeral."
"Whatya mean, 'What am I doing here?'" said Dally. "What the heck are you doing here? You died in the hospital. Remember? I saw you die, man. Now here you are flying around here like some crazy Kamikaze."
Just then Ponyboy came to. He sat up, coughing. "Whoa!" he finally choked out. "I was like, gone for a while, wasn't I, guys?" He stared at Dally and Johnny. "I know why Dally was in the lake. I know how Johnny got back and…" he glanced at Two Bit…"how each of you are going to die, especially you, Keith."
Cherry came over and sat down by Ponyboy. She looked at Darry, "Is he in shock or something?"
Darrell shrugged. "I don't really care right now. He's gonna live, that's all I care about. Now I want to know why Dally was in the lake and why we are seeing two dead people arguing about who shouldn't be here."
"I can tell you that," said Ponyboy.
Two Bit came over and joined the huddle. "I think Johnny might have been to the junkyard, cause most of the stuff on that gyrocopter has been cobbled together from spare parts from the looks of it."
Darry and Cherry looked impressed. "That's tuff," said Darry. "Yeah," said Cherry.
Soda pop came over and said, "I think Dally needs a bath or something. He really stinks."
"Why is no one listening to me?" said Ponyboy.
"Hush, baby brother," said Darry. "It's going to be okay. I've got you now."
"We need to figure out why Dally and Johnny are still alive," said Cherry. "It doesn't make any sense. Does it? I mean, I am a natural red head and all but sometimes over the weekends I bleach my hair, then change it back before anyone else knows it."
"Well," said Two Bit, his voice sounding conspiratorial, "I have a theory that the…"
"I said, I can tell you the answers," said Ponyboy a little louder this time.
"Hey, control your little brat, I mean your little brother, there, Superman," said Two Bit. "As I was saying, my theory is the cops used rubber bullets on Dally to just knock him out and then took him somewhere to torture him, threw him in the lake here thinking he was dead, and then he just kind of came around in just the nick of time to save Darry and Ponyboy."
Two Bit glanced around the group as they all stared at him. "Hey," he said, punching Ponyboy's shoe, "no hard feelings, huh kid?"
Ponyboy rolled his eyes and shook his head. He took a deep breath and was about to explain the insight he'd been given while in the realm of the afterlife, when Darrel started talking again.
"Man, just look at Johnny go. Man that fool can fly. He's like some floating monkey from Dorothy and the Wizard of Id or something, huh?"
"Yeah," said Cherry, "and Dally's like one of those cave people from B.C., yuk yuk yuk."
Everyone except Ponyboy started laughing at Cherry's joke but really it was because of her funny manner of laughing. They'd never heard a girl laugh like a seal before.
Two Bit slapped her on the back. "Cherry, you are one crazy broad. I knew I liked you for some reason."
They were all sitting there still laughing when Dally walked over to them, carrying the remains of a broken gyrocopter. "I'm sorry, fellas," he said, sounding more sorry than usual, "I think I killed the pet. I just wanted him to stop circling me with all that buzzing."
Everyone leapt to their feet, except Ponyboy. He stayed sitting on the dirt. "It's been real nice knowing all of you," he whispered.
"What have you done with him, you demoniac?" shouted Two Bit. He grabbed Dally around the throat and tried to choke him, but his hands just kept slipping off. "Ooh, that's gross," he said, wiping off the slime on the front of Cherry's blouse.
"Stop it!" Cherry grabbed one of the blades from the gyrocopter and swung it at Two Bit. His head bounced down the hill into the lake, saying, "She killed me! I can't believe she killed mebbbbbbbbubububub."
Everyone watched in stunned silence as Darry shoved Cherry into the fire pit. Her hair blazed orange and blue as she ran streaking around the gang for a few seconds before falling and rolling down the hill in a sizzling mass of stinking flesh and expired in the water.
"Two more down and two more to go," said Ponyboy, shaking his head sadly.
Sodapop charged at Darry and they both fell on some broken beer bottles and kept fighting all the way to the lake where both of them turned the water red and sunk beneath the surface making angry gurgling sounds all the way.
Pony got up and dusted himself off. He put his arm around Dally as the two of them carried the wreckage of the mutilated Johnny-copter down and into the water. "It's gonna be okay, old friend. We'll all be together now forever."
"Be like old times," said Dally, nodding his sodgy head.
"Except for cigarettes, right?" said Ponyboy, suddenly looking worried, "they don't burn down there, do they?"
"Nope," said Dally, sadly. "Only thing smokes down there, kid, is us."
