She was on an absolute high. She had just had the best semester of her life and she was sure her father would be proud of her this time. The windows in her Honda Civic were rolled down and the warm air of Georgia summer blew her auburn hair about her face. She hummed to herself as she pulled into the long driveway of her parent's farm house.
She never understood why her father moved to the farm in the first place. She was born and raised in New Orleans, but as soon as she graduated, her parents moved to a small, self-sustaining farm outside of Atlanta. Her father was constantly trying to keep up with the Joneses. When everyone started "going green," her father did so by moving to this farm.
She pulled the car around the back of the house and parked next to her father's jeep. She grabbed her bags from the trunk and made her way inside the house.
"Mom, Dad? I'm home for the summer!"
She heard footsteps rushing down the back hall toward the kitchen. Her mother rounded the corner and wrapped Honor in a tight embrace. The woman was even frailer than Honor remembered. This was the third time the cancer had come back and her mother refused treatment. She told Honor her body was tired and she was using up vital resources that could be used to treat someone younger. This broke Honor's heart, but she understood.
"Oh! I'm so glad my baby is back."
She squeezed Honor ever tighter. Honor struggled to pull back so she could look her mother in the face. When she finally got her mother to loosen her grip she saw that her mother's eyes were rimmed with red. She had been crying again, and there was a fresh bruise on her cheek. She brushed the purple whelp with her fingertips. The look in her mother's eyes was enough to warn her of her father's temper. She kissed her mother on the opposite cheek and picked up her things. She moved quietly to her room and began to unpack her things.
She was hanging up the last of her clothes when she heard her father's heavy work boots trudging down the hall. They stopped and she knew he was in her doorway staring at her. She hung her head and spoke softly.
"Hi, Daddy."
"You best turn around and look at me when you talk to me…"
His voice was cold and demanding. She turned to him slowly. His eyes were on fire and she knew this encounter would only end badly.
"Hello, Daddy. I'm sorry that I spoke with my back to you." Knowing that eye contact would be just as dangerous as keeping her back to him, she cast her eyes to the hardwood floor under her feet. She clasped her hands behind her back and stood stark still to keep from giving him any excuses for hurting her.
"What kind of piss poor grades did you bring home this time?" He crossed his arms across his chest as he waited for her answer.
"I got all A's, Daddy. I did just like you told me. I didn't waste your money this time." Her face and voice were emotionless.
"You know letters don't mean shit to me, you dumb bitch. Gimmie numbers and they better be good."
She retained her composure even though inside she was already screaming. She could feel his hands on her body without hi even touching her and she was terrified.
"I made 3 100's, a 96, and a…" her voice trailed off. She gathered herself quickly and continued.
"And a 91…" Internally she braced herself for the onslaught of his fists that she knew was inevitable.
Honor was pursuing her degree to become a forensic pathologist. Her dream job was to become a Medical Examiner for the city of New Orleans so she could move home. To anyone else this amazing feat would have been commendable but to her father it was an utter failure.
Her father walked toward her slowly, each footfall heavy and hollow on the wooden floorboards. He grabbed her by her chin and jerked her face toward his. He forced her to look into his eyes for what seemed an eternity before he spoke again.
"3 100's," he shrugged.
"Not bad. 96…okay. But a 91?" He shook his head at her. He pulled her closer, his face inches from hers.
"Unacceptable."
In one swift motion he let go of her chin and backhanded her. She hit the floor hard and before she could make a motion to get back up she felt his rough hands pulling her up by the arm.
"Why couldn't you have been more like your brother? Better yet, why couldn't you have just been a boy? Why did your cunt of a mother give me a girl?" He punctuated each question with another hard smack across the face.
For some reason unknown to Honor and her mother, Honor's father hated her. He was just sure they would be having another son. The day that she was born her father's temperament changed. Before Honor's birth he was never a violent man but it was like her birth flipped some invisible switch in him. Whatever his reason, Honor was destined for a ghastly existence.
"I figured you woulda learned your lesson by now. Evidently you are as stupid as you look." He shoved her to the ground and planted a boot in her ribs before turning and exiting the room. She knew he would take things out on her mother next and she felt terrible about it. The tears flowed silently as she cried herself to sleep on the cold wood floor.
Early in June Honor and her family were sitting in the living room. Things were quiet. Honor had been helping her father around the farm which brought her back into his good graces. Her parents were watching the TV Her mother slowly sipped a glass of red wine. It calmed her and made the pain subside slightly. Her father was worn out from a long day on the farm and he stared absently at the TV. Honor sat with a magazine in her lap.
A loud warning tone from the Emergency Alert System shocked the family back to reality. The computerized voice spoke of a disease outbreak overtaking the outlying areas outside Atlanta. It warned citizens in these areas to evacuate into the city where they would be provided with temporary shelter until the outbreak could be contained. Honor's mother began to panic.
"Would you shut the hell up, woman? We ain't goin' anywhere. We can sustain ourselves on this farm for three months without having to even walk off the premises. Things are bound to be fine by then."
And with that he shut the TV off and went to bed.
A few days later Honor was up and out early to milk the cows. She hummed to herself as she stepped through the gate that separated the main yard from the cow pen. As she approached she could see that their two bulls and one female were down and there were figures writhing on top of them. A man stood with his back to her and was causing their other female great distress.
"Hey! Mister! Get away from our cow! How the hell did you get back here?"
As she called out to him all the figures turned their faces to look at her. They were human, but Honor's time in cadaver lab told her they definitely weren't alive. She stood gaping in horror. The man standing next to the female turned last and she could see his hands full of her flesh and there was a gaping hole in her side. The group began to amble toward her. She dropped her pail and ran back to the house.
"Daddy, there are some…things outside messing with the cows!"
Her father came running from the front room where he had been enjoying his morning coffee.
"Grab a pistol and my shotgun, Honor."
He took off outside as she ran to her parents bedrooms to grab the guns. She met him outside and handed him the shotgun. The group had made it past the fence and was moving closer to the house. She had never seen such a look of terror on her father's face. He silently leveled the shotgun at the first of the group and blasted away. It fell quickly and he leveled off to shoot another one. Honor cocked her pistol and helped, firing away at the three that were left.
"Get in the house. Lock the doors. We're not even stepping outside unless we have to."
A week into the outbreak the power shut off. Honor's father was forced to fire up the generator to keep the house running. This meant that he would have to make runs into town to pick up supplies and gas. He used Honor's car as it provided more safety for him than the open jeep.
One month into the outbreak and there was still no news. Honor's father stubbornly refused to go into Atlanta. The first time she argued with this decision, Honor was beaten for it. He was positive that in time they would be contacted by the National Guard if evacuation was unavoidable. Every three or four days a walker or two would stumble onto the farm. Honor feared this was not the worst and, in an effort to conserve ammo, took to smashing them in the head with an axe. This meant she had to get close to them and deal with the stench, but it also meant she was keeping her mother safe who was getting weaker by the day.
A month and a half into the outbreak and her mother could no longer get out of bed in the morning. Early on a Thursday in late July, Honor's father was forced to get out for more gas and painkillers for her mother. Honor sat next to her mother's bed all day. Her mother wouldn't eat any more, but Honor made sure to keep her hydrated and poured small sips of water into her mother's mouth. The sun set but Honor's father still hadn't returned home. She locked up the house and kissed her mother goodnight. If her father wasn't back when she woke the next morning she would chalk him up as a lost cause. No one would blame her.
"'Night, momma. I love you. See you in the morning."
"Goodnight, my beautiful baby," her mother whispered back to her.
She turned off the light in her mother's room and crossed down the hallway to her own.
Her father wasn't home in the morning when she woke. Honor made breakfast for herself, cleaned up the kitchen, and then walked down the back hallway to check on her mother. She crossed to her mother's bed and shook the woman's shoulder gently. When that didn't rouse her, Honor shook a bit harder and called to her.
"Momma, I know you're tired but you need to wake up for a bit…"
Her voice always woke her mother. Honor knew something wasn't right. She put her fingers to her mother's neck and watched the woman's chest. There was no pulse and her breast did not rise and fall. The impact of her death hit Honor like a wrecking ball to the chest. She stumbled backward to the wall and slouched to the floor in tears and stayed this way for the next few hours.
When the harsh light of the setting sun began to spill across her face from the window by her parent's bed she knew that her father wouldn't be returning. No doubt he was one of the shuffling masses now. She knew that she would have to bury her mother. Then she would be completely on her own. She pulled the blanket up and covered her mother's body before going outside. She scanned her surroundings and, when she was satisfied that she was alone, she began to dig a grave for her mother.
Honor finished the grave just before the sun dropped completely behind the horizon. She walked back to her parent's bedroom and wrapped her mother in the blanket she was under. She hefted her mother's emaciated frame and laid her gently into the earth. She shoveled dirt into the grave and packed it tightly. Then she went back into the house, locked up, and laid in her bed. Despite her overwhelming sadness, no tears would flow.
The days went by in a blur. One day flowed endlessly into the next. Honor had never been alone in her life and being suddenly thrown into complete isolation was a shock to the system. She continued to go into town when needed to gas up and gather supplies.
A month or so after her mother's passing Honor began to patrol outside the fence to make sure that no walkers could get inside the fence. She was finishing her evening patrol when she heard footsteps coming up behind her quickly. She spun around and pulled her axe up over her head, ready to smash the skulls of however many walkers had followed her.
But once she was turned around to face her attacker she froze. It wasn't a walker. It was another living, breathing man. And that man had a crossbow pointed directly at her face. She dropped the axe and threw her hands in the air.
"Wh-who the fuck are you?" she asked in an insolent tone.
"I should be askin' ya the same thing," the man retorted harshly.
"My name is Honor. I live by myself up the hill," she turned and pointed up the hill to the farm house.
"Yourself, huh?" He lowered the crossbow. Something in her face told him she wasn't a threat.
"Yeah. Got any news on the outbreak?" Her eyes shined at him hopefully.
"Yeah. Got any food?"