Word Count: 500.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
"You were, well, dead, at the time," Shikamaru explains, embarrassed. "There wasn't a whole lot you could do." He is flinching, blushing all the time he says it, genuinely mortified to be having to point it out. The knowledge also hangs in the air, that Shizune, like everyone else who was killed then brought back by Pein, refuses to speak of what happened to her after her death.
"You were dead…"
It doesn't stop her from feeling guilty, though.
Tsunade seems smaller, somehow. In her prone, vulnerable state, Tsunade seems to shrink somewhat. She doesn't look peaceful, nor does she look tormented. She looks…dead, and it makes Shizune's heart pound and makes her check every hour to make sure Tsunade's still breathing.
Nothing seems right anymore, with her mistress lying prostrate on the ground. That Konoha has been utterly destroyed Shizune can ignore, because Konoha wasn't her home until a few years ago and buildings can always be rebuilt.
But Tsunade unanimated… That is terrifying and looking down at her pale, cold face is the worst experience of Shizune's life.
Shizune can not afford to let down her guard, not even for a moment; there's no telling if the ROOT are a threat to Tsunade, though it is certain they will be if Danzo decides it. Shizune does not sleep well on her pallet by the door, and in the darkness every moving shadow becomes an assassin in the night.
When Utatane Koharu and Mitokado Homura and Shimura Danzo step into the room, they offer empty words of regret and sympathy, their eyes gleaming with ill-disguised triumph. Shizune has distrusted all three of them since they used her to undermine Tsunade, but for the first time, she despises them. The thought of Danzo as Hokage fills Shizune with dread for the future of the village, and every time Kakashi comes she begs him to accept the offer of Rokudaime Hokage, because Kakashi will be much better for Konoha than Danzo ever will be.
Nagging feelings of guilt never leave Shizune alone anymore. She supposes it's just a sign of how truly irrational and broken up she has become that she's feeling guilty that she couldn't help Tsunade because she was carrying out her orders and that she was dead because of it.
But most of all, Shizune sits and prays that Tsunade will wake up.
Tsunade has always been what makes Shizune who she is. Shizune was never far from Tsunade's side, Tsunade never far from Shizune's thoughts. She realizes that she has built up her entire life around one woman, and when that woman lies comatose, possibly dying, Shizune realizes how foolish it was to build up a life entirely dependent on one fragile beating heart, that her own life was always just one heartbeat away from falling apart.
Shizune knows that she is nothing without Tsunade.
And if she dies…
I said I would follow you anywhere. If I must follow you into death, then so be it.