SSBM Iron Chef
By DavidM412
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters for SSBM or Iron Chef legally, although I would like to own SSBM's characters.
[SHOT OF KAGA SITTING AT HIS DESK EATING A CAKE.]
Kaga [VOICE-OVER]: It has been quite some time since I had one of my Iron Chefs battle in Kitchen Stadium. [SHOT OF AN EMPTY KITCHEN STADIUM] But I have gotten a request from someone who I had no clue existed: Roy of Super Smash Brothers Melee fame. He has requested that he tag up with Marth to do battle in a tag match.
Roy: I think that my culinary skills are second to none. Me and Marth have this match in the bag. [TIME PASSES] Marth...I hope he can take the time to cook something great for the tasters.
Marth: My reaction to Roy getting me into Kitchen Stadium is not the most pleasant. I would like to show the Iron Chefs that I can get my groove on in the kitchen. But can I cook? Not really. Not even Ramen noodles.
[KAGA IS NOW POKING A CRAB. HE POKES IT A LITTLE TOO MUCH AND THE CRAB BITES HIM BELOW THE BELT.]
Kaga [STILL VOICE-OVER, BUT HIGH-PITCHED]: Now Roy and Marth, show us how much work you're going to put into your dishes and see if you can be today's winners!
Marth: I'll do my best, but I'd like to see how Roy's going to put up with me.
Roy: I hope we win so the Iron Chefs can bow down to us.
[OPENING MUSIC/SEQUENCE PLAYS, COMMERCIALS PLAY]
Fukui: Welcome. Today we see two Super Smash Brothers Melee players try their luck at two of the Iron Chefs. Joining us today are actress Mayuko Takata and SSBM character Ganondorf. Welcome.
Takata: Nice to be here.
Ganondorf: Thank you.
Fukui: And our commentator Doctor Yukio Hattori.
Hattori: Always a pleasure.
Fukui: Let's bring on Chairman Kaga.
[APPLAUSE]
Kaga: Well, without interruption, let me bring them on! From Super Smash Brothers Melee, master swordsmen Roy and Marth!
[ROY AND MARTH ENTER FROM BEHIND BIG RED CURTAIN.]
Kaga: Welcome. [SHAKES ROY'S AND MARTH'S HANDS] Now, I understand that Roy does not speak that much English.
Roy: I'm fluent, thank you.
Marth: Mess up again, and you'll be seeing my sword up your...
Kaga: Okay. Now let me introduce the pride of the Gourmet Academy...the three Iron Chefs. I summon my Iron Chefs!
[SAKAI, MORIMOTO, AND CHEN RISE. ROY AND MARTH ARE WHISPERING TO EACH OTHER AS TO WHO THEY WILL PICK.]
Fukui: And now, the nation's culinary leaders...your Iron Chefs! Iron Chef Chinese Chen Kenichi, Iron Chef French Hiroyuki Sakai, and Iron Chef Japanese Masaharu Morimoto! Here they are, the invincible men of culinary skills!
Kobe [FROM BACK]: Hey! Why can't I battle?
Kaga: Quiet, Kobe. I don't want you to, that's why. [TO ROY AND MARTH] So, who will it be!
Marth: Do you know who? Choose wisely.
Roy: Sakai and Morimoto!
Fukui: All right! A cross-cuisine battle against Iron Chefs Hiroyuki Sakai and Masaharu Morimoto. Sakai is the first to blend French and Japanese techniques [SCREEN SHOWS SAKAI PICTURES], and Morimoto has never cooked by the book [SCREEN SHOWS MORIMOTO PICTURES]. This should prove to be an interesting battle!
Kaga: I wanted to choose an ingredient that would do justice to a tag match with two swordsmen from video game fame. Then it hit me--why not get a theme that is video game related? We unveil the ingredient!
[KAGA UNVEILS THE INGREDIENT. STUNNED LOOKS ON BOTH IRON CHEFS AND CHALLENGERS' FACES.]
Kaga: Today's theme is...MAXIM TOMATO!
[CAPTION ON BOTTOM RIGHT OF SCREEN HAS KITCHEN STADIUM LOGO AND WORDS "MAXIM TOMATO BATTLE".]
Fukui: All right, today we'll see two swordsmen from Super Smash Brothers Melee go up against two of our Iron Chefs! A cross-cuisine battle! Maxim tomatoes as the theme ingredient! We are set...let's get it on!
Kaga: Allez cuisine! [GONG SOUNDS]
Fukui: Bang a gong, we are on. And Morimoto and Roy are up to the theme ingredient stand selecting their Maxim tomatoes for this battle.
[CAPTION READS "TIME LIMIT: 60 MINUTES. THE CHEFS WHO ARTICULATE THE THEME INGREDIENT THE BEST WIN. IN CASE OF A TIE, THERE WILL BE A 30-MINUTE REMATCH WILL OCCUR."]
Takata: Ooh, maxim tomatoes. Those are fruits, right?
Doc: Well, you could call them fruits. But to Roy and Marth, you can't call them fruits. To them, maxim tomatoes are energy. Without them, they die quicker.
Ganondorf: Yes, true. Doc's right. To the battlers in Super Smash Brothers Melee, we don't think of maxim tomatoes as just plain fruit. It's our energy, and we need it to survive when we're battling.
Ohta: Fukui-san!
Fukui: From the floor, Shinichiro Ohta. Go!
Ohta: Thank you! I just heard from the Iron Chefs' side that they're going to be making a joint dish. Back to you!
Takata: Since when did they decide on a joint dish?
[GANONDORF WHACKS TAKATA'S HEAD.]
Ganondorf: Didn't you hear Ohta say that they were making a joint dish?
Takata: Uh, not really.
Ganondorf: The troubles of sitting next to an airhead like you.
By DavidM412
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters for SSBM or Iron Chef legally, although I would like to own SSBM's characters.
[SHOT OF KAGA SITTING AT HIS DESK EATING A CAKE.]
Kaga [VOICE-OVER]: It has been quite some time since I had one of my Iron Chefs battle in Kitchen Stadium. [SHOT OF AN EMPTY KITCHEN STADIUM] But I have gotten a request from someone who I had no clue existed: Roy of Super Smash Brothers Melee fame. He has requested that he tag up with Marth to do battle in a tag match.
Roy: I think that my culinary skills are second to none. Me and Marth have this match in the bag. [TIME PASSES] Marth...I hope he can take the time to cook something great for the tasters.
Marth: My reaction to Roy getting me into Kitchen Stadium is not the most pleasant. I would like to show the Iron Chefs that I can get my groove on in the kitchen. But can I cook? Not really. Not even Ramen noodles.
[KAGA IS NOW POKING A CRAB. HE POKES IT A LITTLE TOO MUCH AND THE CRAB BITES HIM BELOW THE BELT.]
Kaga [STILL VOICE-OVER, BUT HIGH-PITCHED]: Now Roy and Marth, show us how much work you're going to put into your dishes and see if you can be today's winners!
Marth: I'll do my best, but I'd like to see how Roy's going to put up with me.
Roy: I hope we win so the Iron Chefs can bow down to us.
[OPENING MUSIC/SEQUENCE PLAYS, COMMERCIALS PLAY]
Fukui: Welcome. Today we see two Super Smash Brothers Melee players try their luck at two of the Iron Chefs. Joining us today are actress Mayuko Takata and SSBM character Ganondorf. Welcome.
Takata: Nice to be here.
Ganondorf: Thank you.
Fukui: And our commentator Doctor Yukio Hattori.
Hattori: Always a pleasure.
Fukui: Let's bring on Chairman Kaga.
[APPLAUSE]
Kaga: Well, without interruption, let me bring them on! From Super Smash Brothers Melee, master swordsmen Roy and Marth!
[ROY AND MARTH ENTER FROM BEHIND BIG RED CURTAIN.]
Kaga: Welcome. [SHAKES ROY'S AND MARTH'S HANDS] Now, I understand that Roy does not speak that much English.
Roy: I'm fluent, thank you.
Marth: Mess up again, and you'll be seeing my sword up your...
Kaga: Okay. Now let me introduce the pride of the Gourmet Academy...the three Iron Chefs. I summon my Iron Chefs!
[SAKAI, MORIMOTO, AND CHEN RISE. ROY AND MARTH ARE WHISPERING TO EACH OTHER AS TO WHO THEY WILL PICK.]
Fukui: And now, the nation's culinary leaders...your Iron Chefs! Iron Chef Chinese Chen Kenichi, Iron Chef French Hiroyuki Sakai, and Iron Chef Japanese Masaharu Morimoto! Here they are, the invincible men of culinary skills!
Kobe [FROM BACK]: Hey! Why can't I battle?
Kaga: Quiet, Kobe. I don't want you to, that's why. [TO ROY AND MARTH] So, who will it be!
Marth: Do you know who? Choose wisely.
Roy: Sakai and Morimoto!
Fukui: All right! A cross-cuisine battle against Iron Chefs Hiroyuki Sakai and Masaharu Morimoto. Sakai is the first to blend French and Japanese techniques [SCREEN SHOWS SAKAI PICTURES], and Morimoto has never cooked by the book [SCREEN SHOWS MORIMOTO PICTURES]. This should prove to be an interesting battle!
Kaga: I wanted to choose an ingredient that would do justice to a tag match with two swordsmen from video game fame. Then it hit me--why not get a theme that is video game related? We unveil the ingredient!
[KAGA UNVEILS THE INGREDIENT. STUNNED LOOKS ON BOTH IRON CHEFS AND CHALLENGERS' FACES.]
Kaga: Today's theme is...MAXIM TOMATO!
[CAPTION ON BOTTOM RIGHT OF SCREEN HAS KITCHEN STADIUM LOGO AND WORDS "MAXIM TOMATO BATTLE".]
Fukui: All right, today we'll see two swordsmen from Super Smash Brothers Melee go up against two of our Iron Chefs! A cross-cuisine battle! Maxim tomatoes as the theme ingredient! We are set...let's get it on!
Kaga: Allez cuisine! [GONG SOUNDS]
Fukui: Bang a gong, we are on. And Morimoto and Roy are up to the theme ingredient stand selecting their Maxim tomatoes for this battle.
[CAPTION READS "TIME LIMIT: 60 MINUTES. THE CHEFS WHO ARTICULATE THE THEME INGREDIENT THE BEST WIN. IN CASE OF A TIE, THERE WILL BE A 30-MINUTE REMATCH WILL OCCUR."]
Takata: Ooh, maxim tomatoes. Those are fruits, right?
Doc: Well, you could call them fruits. But to Roy and Marth, you can't call them fruits. To them, maxim tomatoes are energy. Without them, they die quicker.
Ganondorf: Yes, true. Doc's right. To the battlers in Super Smash Brothers Melee, we don't think of maxim tomatoes as just plain fruit. It's our energy, and we need it to survive when we're battling.
Ohta: Fukui-san!
Fukui: From the floor, Shinichiro Ohta. Go!
Ohta: Thank you! I just heard from the Iron Chefs' side that they're going to be making a joint dish. Back to you!
Takata: Since when did they decide on a joint dish?
[GANONDORF WHACKS TAKATA'S HEAD.]
Ganondorf: Didn't you hear Ohta say that they were making a joint dish?
Takata: Uh, not really.
Ganondorf: The troubles of sitting next to an airhead like you.