Someday when I smile it will be you I'll smile at.
And you'll smile back at me and mean it.
Bouquet of Moonstones
Blair was beautiful but she was hurt far beyond that beauty and Louis couldn't see beyond the paper doll existence. Louis thought she looked beyond beloved, except- except sometimes he saw something sort of, maybe cracked in those glass perfect, unreadable eyes and that was when he wondered whether he was willing to know those scars after all.
Blair is beautiful but there's a thin, slim, invisible bone white jarring that runs delicately across on vaguely imperfect apple cheek and that is when Louis wonders if he really wants to know what is this past of hers that she loves so truly that she defends even when its wrongs face her in the mirror.
He hurt you.
He didn't mean it.
He still hurt you.
He still didn't mean it.
I want you to stay away from him.
One sudden flash of fire in usually tranquil doe eyes.
That's not your decision to make.
I thought you agreed to marry me.
I didn't agree to be owned by you.
So that should mean that I have some say in your life decisions.
Not this one.
Why not this one?
Because it's my life to make.
He heard the words she didn't say but were spelled all too clearly in those furious chestnut eyes of hers.
Because it's Chuck.
It was a random question he asked on a day she wasn't so touchy.
What do you like best about Chuck?
She thought about it for a moment and then looked befuddled- not because there was nothing for her to say but because perhaps there was too much.
He doesn't know how to give up, she says finally and Louis can understand her respect of that quality because Blair doesn't know how to give up either.
Except somehow he had expected her to say:
He knows exactly when to give up.
…
Take care of her.
I will.
Don't ever hurt her.
Or else?
Chuck had merely smiled very, very darkly and walked away leaving Louis more thoughtful than he would have been, had he gotten a straight answer.
I love you Blair.
She'll love me forever.
But she belongs to me.
Not in her whole.
But she's mine.
She's only belonged to that one. Otherwise Blair Waldorf doesn't belong to anyone.
Blair Grimaldi.
A slow smile spread across Chuck's face.
Right.
Why are you smiling?
It's just- I know her. She'll never let you change the name.
I… you don't know that-
She didn't.
Louis could be accusing sometimes.
You love him.
She felt very Twilight as she said it.
I love you more.
But was that true? She would never love anyone as much as she loved Chuck but she was, really was happy with Louis.
All that glitters is not gold.
But the tiara on her head was solid diamonds and it shone as fiercely as a bouquet of moonstones.
You're mine, Blair.
Stop it, Chuck.
She misses him. When she's curled up in the palace and the fire is blazing to warm her and Louis is reading her the newspaper as though she can't do it herself, she misses him.
It wouldn't be my world without you in it.
She gives him several invitations to the wedding because he never accepts even one.
Come, Chuck. She snarls on the phone.
He laughs. Oh, Waldorf.
She ignores the layer of meaning in that voice and says, You have to come. If you won't come I'll be really, really angry.
He's laughing softly but as though he can't stop. You know full well ordinarily I would have no problem with coming. But I'm- a little busy.
Liar. At least try to sound genuine, Chuck.
I can't seem to pick you out the perfect wedding present.
You never have a problem picking me out presents.
Yes, but this time the trinket I have in mind doesn't seem right.
No?
No.
Well, tell me what it is. Maybe I can help.
It's a diamond.
Lovely. You know a girl loves diamonds.
It's just one.
Okay. Is it a pendant?
Not quite.
A bracelet?
Not exactly.
She takes a deep breath.
What make is it?
Parisian.
Chuck.
Blair.
I will not- you can't gift me the ring.
The thing is Waldorf, he answers softly, I really don't want to take it with me to the grave.
He kisses her softly when he meets her in Paris but it's on the cheek, exactly where he scarred her when he didn't mean to, the thing you can't even see anymore because it's the same pale as her skin now and she has forgiven him for it because- because-
Because for some you forgive sometimes the things you wouldn't forgive for any one else.
And because he hadn't mean it.
He whispers in her ear at the reception.
I will always love you.
It's a cop out and unoriginal but she replies without even thinking.
I will always love you.
It doesn't even matter if she's got the ring deep inside a jewelry box only she can open in a drawer which has only one key and that the key is in a place Louis doesn't know of. These things don't matter because she loves Chuck, she loves him, loves him, loves him but Louis makes her happy, happy, happy.
When they dance briefly at her wedding, so briefly, even if she can still feel the touch of his hand burning at the back of her princess dress- it feels very Twilight to her because she wants to cry so badly and because she knows he's one scotch away from making a scene or at the very least challenging the Prince to a duel.
So she takes one last twirl and when she's back in his arms she only says very softly to him before he lets her go and the Prince comes to claim her.
Be happy.
He just gives her a yeah-right look and then smiles a little disjointedly at Louis as he comes, sash and crown and all, to gently steer her away.
But she hears the thing that was only for her ears.
You first.
She is still thinking of how her logic is so perfect- of how Louis is so perfect because while she really, really loves Chuck, Louis is the one who's sane and who's smart and who's stable and hence he makes her-
Her-
For one instant she can't remember her brilliant reasoning or why she married the handsome stranger holding her so delicately and then she see's Chuck's face across the room as he makes a half hearted attempt to flirt with some blonde heiress and.
She thinks he could try to look happier.
That was it!
Blair rests her face on Louis's shoulder and all the while hopes no one can she the farce of her glass-perfect eyes that hide too many webs of lies.
The word was happy.