So, here's something that no one will ever read! Yay for obscure Pulitzer Prize winners!
Where are all these Dominicans coming from?
Oops. That wasn't supposed to happen. Really, I assure you, hijo, you were not supposed to go over that way. I know I was late and didn't quite get there on time, but at least you had the common decency to fall off the non-lethal side.
Really now, what is it with you and your family constantly pestering me? Your mother and your grandfather and you. Can't a cross-dimensional otherworldly being such as myself find some sort of solitude? Of course not. I had forgotten you were prone to the fantastical adventures of Akira, Robotech, and The Lord of the Rings. Joy. I assure you that, although I dislike you silly creatures, I am here to help. I will admit, however, I did try to off your mother. That truck was not supposed to stop. And if it hadn't, you ask? Well, your lack of life would be, naturally, pain-free, sorrow-free, and I suppose the most important of all, fat-free!
Oh. I see. I'm sorry I offend you, hijo. What was that? You want to know what I would do with my free time? Well, I would be free to live my life happily, caring for my children, fending off carnivores, and spending every day of my life searching for food! Haha, no. What do you take me for, child, a rat? There is no such glory in simple tasks as that. A great being such as I, reduced to menial, thoughtless processes?
But, since you have my attention, I suppose I will impart on you some extremely valuable advice. It is so beautifully unique that I must first tell you to never impart it to anyone. No, it is not the meaning of life, we all know the answer to that is forty-two. Hush now, hijo. It is simply to struggle. To strive for existence and continuity. This is ingrained into your existence and although it may seem like the Death Star is about to atomize your TIE-Fighter, struggle onwards.
Listen to me, Oscar. I, like many other things, am as old as history. I have always watched, will always listen, and will always be there. I am always and forever. Here to deliver you the boost in the proper direction; the Yoda to your Anakin, if it is too much for you to handle. I am the Sueño de la Madrugada, the Early Morning Dream. Now awaken; this is your reality.
Four white walls. Two broken legs. A separated shoulder.
If you couldn't tell, this was from the Point of View of the Golden Mongoose (that was black and only had Golden Eyes XD). If you want to make it slightly more humorous, just imagine that this is Evan Lysacek speaking to Oscar. I felt that the Golden Mongoose had pretty much no role in the book itself and was pretty much just an afterthought. The only one it actually protected was Beli, the mother.