Disclaim I do not own ANY of the Naruto characters nor do I even need to. The characters featured in this fanfic belong to Masashi Kishimoto.
The Villain Awards: Pre-show
"Welcome to the pre-show of the Villain Awards, I'm your host Uzumaki Naruto, dattebayo!!"
"Shut it, usuratonkashi! You're making a fool out of your self,"
"And this is my o' so cheerful, team-mate/enemy/best friend in the show, Uchiha Sasuke, also know as chicken butt hair and the teme!"
"I do NOT have chicken butt hair!"
"YOUR HAIR DOES LOOK LIKE THE REAR OF A DUCK OR A CHICKEN!!"
"See, the public agrees with me!"
"Hn…"
"Moving on, Sasuke here is nominee for best betrayal scene. How does it feel to be nominated for this award?"
"Hn…"
"Come on! Are you still upset about the hair comment? Get over it already! "'
"HN!"
"While Sasuke's cooling off, we'll go to Shino and Ino who's standing somewhere…"
"They're greeting the villains at the red carpet, Baka!"
" ITAI!! SAKURA-CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!! WHEN DID YOU GET HERE?!"
"I have been here the whole time!"
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"ARGGGGGG! FOREHEAD GIRL JUST WANTS ALL THE ATTENTION TO HERSELF! LOOK AT ME, CAN PUNCH A HOLE IN THE WALL. B-B-BUT EVERYONE HAS TO SAVE ME IN BATTLE! SHE IS SUCH A BRAT!"
"Ino, we're on!"
"O-oh, hehe…Weeeell, here with us is Orochimaru-san, one of the legendary sannins. You nominated for several awards, how do you feel about that?"
"Kukuku, I'm happy that my hard work is finally being appreciated. Do you know how much time evil experimenting takes?"
"…Nnoooo, of course not…"
"It takes years, YEARS I say!"
"Okaaaay…"
"After all those years, NOOOOOWW the see the value of it…"
"…M-mister…you're scaring me…, and we don't have anymore time left…. Sooo…"
"Before Orochimaru-san goes into a rant, back to you. Naruto,"
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"B-But, I d-don't b-b-be on TV!"
"Unfortunately, do to extreme injuries Naruto can no longer host the pre-show. He actually ate too much old ramen, and had to go to the hospital. That Baka…"
"B-b-b-but, I c-can't go on T-t-t-V!"
"You're the only one here who's done with their assignment and on set. Therefore you're on…"
"B-b-but, I w-will choke! ... P-please stop pu-pushing me, S-sakura-chan!"
"No! You will go on. You will do fine!"
"B-b-b-b-b-but…"
"We're going on in 3, 2, 1…"
"…"
"TALK HINATA! TALK!"
"…"
"HINATA!"
"…"
"Sending Hinata of all the people around here is plain stupidity, Sakura. You knew she would choke….Troublesome…Now go out there and save Hinata, and the show from embarrassment,"
"What a drag…I knew I shouldn't have agreed to this…"
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"Hello, I'm Haruno Sakura, and this is Hyuuga Hinata,"
"…"
"Unfortunately Naruto, couldn't be here and we are filling in for him."
"Without further ado, let's introduce Kin-san. Kin-san come on out!"
"Hey,"
"…"
"Since most people don't know who you are, do you mind telling them something about yourself?"
"Hmpf!"
"A-a-ano…p-p-please t-tell…"
"Alright, I'm Kin Tsuchi. I was a part of the Sound Nins participating in the Chuunin Exams, and I was fourteen at the time."
"Kin-san, I been wondering about how beautiful and silk looking your hair is. What kind of hair products do you use?"
"What kind of hair products I use has nothing to do with you, but if you must know…Orochimaru makes most of his long haired employees use...mphh…"
"…"
"Kabuto!"
"Shh…do not tell them about 'Orochimaru-sama's secret way to fabulous hair'."
"Mphh…"
"A-a-ano…K-k-abu-to-san? W-why a-a-re you h-here?"
"Yatta! Hinata-chan uttered!"
"NO! Hinata-chan, do not faint!"
"Damn…"
"Psss…Sakura ...Read the posters… Go to the commercials now…troublesome"
"Stay tune. We will be right back with Chouji-kun and Lee-kun."
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"Munch…munch…munch"
"HELLO YOUTHFUL VEIWERS, WELCOME BACK TO THE PRE SHOW OF THE VILLIANS AWARDS. I'M ROCK LEE AND THIS HERE IS THE YOUTHFUL AKIMICHI CHOUJI!"
"Munch…munch …Hi…munch…munch"
"AND HERE WITH US, IS JIROUBOU-SAN FROM THE SOUND FIVE!"
"Hello."
"AS THE YOUTHFUL VIEWERS HERE KNOW, JIROUBOU-SAN AND CHOUJI-KUN HAVE FOUGHT IN THE SERIES, AND THEIR YOUTHFUL FIGHT IS NOMINATED FOR BEST FIGHT. YOSH!"
"Munch …What…munch …do…munch… you think…munch…munch … about the nomination? …munch… "
"…"
"JIROUBOU-SAN! YOU'RE BEING UNYOUTHFUL SPORT! YOU SHOULD BE HONOUR TO BE NOMINATED TO FOR THIS YOUTHFUL AWARD!"
"Shut the hell up, you fucking freak! You're even worse then Tayuya... Blabbing youth all the time …"
"ON THE NAME OF THE RESPECTABLE GAI-SENSEI, I CHALLENGE YOU TO A RACE TO DEFEND MY HONOUR, JIROUBOU-SAN!"
"GAI-SENSEI! I'LL MAKE YOU PROUD!"
"…Munch… I don't… munch … think… munch… he heard you…"
"That fucking moron!"
"Ironic…munch… You're starting … munch … sound like…munch… Tayuya…munch"
"What did you SAY?!"
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"Tenten, do you read me?! As troublesome as it may seem, you have to stop Lee from speaking into the microphone! "
"Why do I have to do that? I've never succeeded in stopping Lee. Ask Sakura to do it."
"Che, I would if not for the troublesome fact that she's here, while you're the closest person from the scene."
"Isn't Chouji with him?"
"Unfortunately, we're not able to contact Chouji. So stop being so troublesome, and get over there as fast as possible!"
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"MY BEAUTIFUL FLOWER OF YOUTH! WHAT BRINGS YOU TO OUR YOUTHFUL CORNER?!"
"Damn it Lee stop embarrassing yourself, you don't have to talk so loudly into the microphone! People on the other side of the world can hear clearly without it! AND WHY ARE YOU RUNNING!"
"JIROUBOU-SAN AND I ARE HAVING A RACE!"
"If you guys are having a race, where is Jiroubou-san then?"
"HUH?! I DON'T SEE HIM ANYWHERE! DOES THIS MEAN I WIN THIS YOUTH RACE?!"
"Baka! Get your behind back to the…"
"OH! GAI-SENSEI! I HAVE MANEGED TO WIN AGAINST JIROUBOU OF THE SOUND FIVE!"
"…Never mind…"
"Shikamaru, Lee has run off to find Gai-sensei…"
"…Troublesome… You should go back to your post Tenten…"
"Okay"
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"GIVE. IT. BACK!"
"Why should I? Hmm? It's not like you're going take it back, anyways."
"GIVE. IT. BACK!!"
"Munch…munch…These chips aren't half bad…munch…munch…"
"GIVE!! IT!! BACK!! GRR!!"
"…munch… Hmm … This is the last of chips… mmm…AHHH!!"
"GRR! YOU WILL REGRATE TRYING TO EAT MY LAST CHIP!"
"Ah! You couldn't even hurt a fly!"
"THIS IS IT! I'M SICK OF TRYING TO BE NICE TO YOU! YOU'RE GOING DOW...!"
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"…"
"HAHAHA!!"
"…Stop laughing you imbecile…"
"I can't believe Chouji is the one causing the commotion. I though Naruto, Lee or even a battle between Sakura and Ino would be the cause! ...hahaha… but not Chouji! Hahaha!"
"Troublesome… By the way you guys are on in 30 seconds… 29 … 28 … 27 …"
"Aww…Can't I finish watching the fight before I go on?"
"No, two are the only ones here and therefore the only ones that can continue hosting the pre-show. Troublesome isn't it?"
"Cut the crap, Nara. I don't care about this idiotic show. It is my fate to do this because Hiashi-sama ordered me to,"
"Tch…You guys have got ten second to get on stage… 8 … 7 … 6 … 5 … 4 … 3 … 2 … 1 … "
"Hey and welcome back to the Villain Awards. I'm Inuzuka Kiba and this Akamaru,"
"Arf!"
"And the person next to me is the destiny obsessed Hyuuga Neji!"
"…Hn…"
"WHERE'S NARUTO, HINATA AND SAKURA!"
"As Sakura-san already said Naruto can not be here right now,"
"While Hinata-chan and Sakura are busy right now, so the two of us are filling in for them,"
"Okay… so Neji, do you think the Uchiha has the chance to win any award tonight?"
"His destiny doesn't foresee that he will win any award tonight…"
"You're a psychic now?"
"Hn…"
"This that a yes?"
"Hn..."
"The public as my witnesses, The Hyuuga Neji, just admitted that he is in fact a clairvoyant."
"No, I did no,"
"Yes, you did! Akamaru here can vouch for that, ehh buddy?"
"Arf!"
"Hn…"
"There you have it people! Neji's a clairvoyant, Sasuke's got a chicken-butt hair, Orochimaru-san has a secret way to fabulous hair, Lee is …Lee, and do NOT get Chouji mad."
"Arf!"
"That's all folks! I'm Inuzuka Kiba and this is Akamaru!"
"Arf!"
"And…this pissed off person next to me is Hyuuga Neji!"
"The awards are up next, so stay tuned!"
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Random things said by the characters after the pre-show:
"…ugh… I really shouldn't have eaten that ramen, b-but it was RAMEN!"
"Are you jealous Ino-pig? That I got more screen time then you."
"Say what ever you want forehead-girl. You know very well which one of us has got the most talent."
"S-s-s-ta-a-age… Mi-mi-mi-millions o-o-of view-e-er… O-o-otou-san..."
"…"
"GAI-SENSEI!!"
"Shut it, Lee!"
""…munch… munch…Bwahaha… munch...munch…"
"Lighten up, Neji! You weren't even denying it!"
"Hn"
"What a drag… At least we're done…"
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A/N: YAY, I'm back with another fic.
This one is do to one my friends drawing!
You should check it out! Her penname is nnoca on DA.
Review people, review!
Baibai
Ookami no Koofuku