A Different Perspective
By Cybra
I would like to begin with a confession:
I'm in love with a mite.
Yes, a mite. A small, organic organism that invades a mobile suit or other machine's body and takes control of them. Those little creatures that use us to fight their wars and continue to kill each other. Most machines cannot stand them, some just obey, two...I suppose the word is "possess"...their pilots to destroy whatever is in their sight (Wing Zero and Epyon, obviously). I've obeyed and even done an "illegal" act: never act on your own in front of a mite.
I have been called by many names: "Prototype 04" in the beginning, just "04" by Oz, and "Sandrock", my favorite. However, I am still the same machine, or (as the mites would call me) AI.* I am also, as mites would say, female. Yes, there are differences between machines like there are between mites...but they are just for machines to know.
I should start my story at the beginning. The VERY beginning. Exactly 4 years before Quatre Reberba Winner became my pilot.
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Back then, I didn't really mind mites. I despised the fact that they could control me from the inside, but that was a mere setback. I had managed to become conscious all on my own, just like many other machines. However, after interfacing with the main computer of Instructor H's lab (Instruct-H), I learned what and what not to do.
I was Prototype 04 at the time. My body was fairly simple. Oh, sure I had weapons, but compared to my body now, it was ridiculously simple. Basically, I had been designed to test out a new type of cockpit. My body stood upright, like many mobile suits, and could walk easily around. I was only a little smaller than I am now, but my present body and my body back then are about the same size.
Instructor H had an assistant at the time. Roger Towning if I recall his name correctly which I know I do. Computers, unlike mites, can never forget.
Oh, blast it! I might as well stop talking like only computers will ever read this! Deathscythe would not be pleased with me if she knew I was writing like an ordinary computer! After all, WE don't refer to them as "mites" when we talk. We refer to them as what they call themselves, "humans".
Now, where was I? Oh yes, Roger Towning. He was a very...shall we say "ambitious"?...human. He believed that I should be in the war as soon as possible. He also despised a town near where I was built. The town leaders had "given him the boot" for his radical and insane ideas.
I was shocked when I felt my middle open up to allow a human inside. I scanned my interior and found Towning sitting inside of me, ready to power me up and get me moving. I had an idea of what his plans were. I was still newly conscious at the time so I had no way to prevent him from taking complete control. I obeyed his every command helplessly as he took me out of the hangar towards the town.
Mass hysteria followed quickly. The humans screamed as I destroyed their homes, powerless to override the commands. Not only was I not experienced enough to do it, but it was an unsaid rule among machines. You never acted on your own in front of a human! It might tip them off to a civilization that they had created.
Then, I spotted a human of 11-years old run out of a building I...no, TOWNING...was destroying. He tripped and fell down. He had a boyish face with blue eyes that were wide with fear...and astonishment when he saw us. His blond hair was dulled with dirt, which had gotten into it when he'd tripped. I gazed in wonderment at the human. I'd seen pictures of humans that young but had never seen one in person.
Towning ignored the fact that there was a human child gawking at us. He fired a round into the side of a building, trying to see if anyone else was inside. A large chunk of the side fell towards the ground. Towards the HUMAN.
The young human's back was turned to where the debris was coming down towards him. I panicked. How could Towning DO something like this?! I was astonished by my own reaction. I CARED about what happened to the human. Ordinarily, I wouldn't have given it a second thought, but in this case, I didn't want to see the child die!
I managed to take control of my hand and swung it down towards the ground. The blond human froze, then looked up to see his certain cause of death. He still couldn't move; he was too terrified.
"What the hell is wrong with you?!" Towning asked as he tried to regain control of my right hand.
I ignored him. My main focus was protecting the human child. I placed my hand over top of him, similar to the way Heero made Wing protect Relena from being crushed, and allowed the large chunk of debris to hit my hand, wounding me slightly.
The threat taken care of, I lifted my hand back up. The human child was now staring up at me. There was confusion in those beautiful blue eyes, but also a way of saying thanks. He didn't understand what was going on.
Towning tried to further destroy the town, but I finally had the will to override his control. I would not allow him to harm other human children. The authorities quickly came and took him away when Instructor H handed him over to them.
My creator removed my chips from the computer onboard, saving everything he needed when he needed to install information into Gundam Sandrock, my present body. I went into limbo when he removed me from my body. I found out later than he destroyed that body. I stayed in limbo for 4 long years.
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I awoke from my long slumber in a slightly larger body than what I was used to. A body quite powerful and strong. I was very pleased. This body would serve me well.
However, I remembered the boy as if he was standing right in front of me. The blond hair, the blue eyes, the boyish face were all engraved into my memory.
Which brings me to another confession I have to make:
I'm EXTREMELY picky.
Wing Zero will take any pilot that wants to fly him, the pilot obviously oblivious to the fact that the Gundam will take over him. Deathscythe prefers to have Duo in the pilot's seat, but will go with the flow. Heavyarms? He'll take any pilot and obey his every command. I, however, have shown how picky I am with the fact that Instructor H tried 4 times before Quatre to find a pilot to fly me.
Why did it take him so long to get to Quatre? The answer lies in the fact that I refused to fly with whoever they were trying next. The first 4 pilots weren't right for me. I felt that I would be unable to stand being piloted by any one of them. I knew the names of all the pilots that they had in mind. Quatre's name was 5th on the list. However, I didn't know who Quatre was at the time.
I refused to work properly whenever a pilot tried to fly me. Unfortunately, since the pilots had seen me, they were all eliminated. I didn't find out about that until much later.
Instructor H was becoming frustrated. I hated to let him down, but the pilot wasn't right. He could never understand. The other Gundams were mostly submissive when their pilots were chosen for them, but I continued to cause problems. He said I had a mind of my own. He has no idea how right he was.
One day, however, I heard Instructor H's voice call out, "Good morning, Quatre!"
I looked around for whomever he was talking to when I saw a 15-year old human with a boyish face, blue eyes, and blond hair. I immediately recognized him as the boy I had saved 4 years ago. If I was human, my heart would've beat faster. I know it sounds corny, but it's true. I was excited to see him.
"Good morning, Instructor H!" Quatre said, returning the greeting. His smile was bright.
"How are you and your father today?" my creator asked, coming into view.
Quatre looked at the floor. He looked sad, upset. I wanted to do something to make him feel better.
"Still fighting, I see," Instructor H noted.
"Yes." However, he looked up at me again. "Is this the mobile suit you were making?"
"Yes, it is. I call it 'Sandrock.'"
There was no way I could tell him that I was a female, not an "it". Very frustrating if you ask me.
"Sandrock..." Quatre repeated, allowing the word to roll around on his tongue.
Can we say "head over heels"? I loved the sound of my name spoken in his voice. I was, as humans would say, "sold" on the boy.
Instructor H very slyly asked, "Would you like to see what it feels like to pilot it?"
'Please say yes!' I begged in my mind.
Quatre's eyes glittered with excitement. "If it's not too much trouble," he said politely.
My creator motioned for the younger human to give it a try. I opened up on command like I always did. That's when I remembered that the Winner family was hiding us. Instructor H would be in big trouble if he had to kill Quatre because he'd seen me.
'No need to worry about it, father,' I thought.
Quatre sat down inside of me and adjusted the cockpit so he could reach everything. After familiarizing himself with my controls, he commanded me to close up. I complied easily. Yes. This pilot felt right. Instructor H raised his eyebrow in astonishment, but said nothing. Quatre moved my arms, made me walk, and even fired my Vulcan guns when my creator told him to. Finally, Instructor H told Quatre to step out of me. I was a little regretful, but easily opened up. Quatre jumped out of me, using the cord to keep himself from breaking his neck.
"Well, what do you think?" Instructor H asked.
"Sandrock is amazing!" he answered with a smile. I would've smiled with immense pleasure...if I could smile, that is.
"How would you like to pilot it? I need a pilot to fly Sandrock and fight against the Earthsphere Alliance."
Quatre thought it over for a moment, debating something with himself. Instructor H waited patiently. I waited impatiently, wanting to hear his answer.
'Please...'
He nodded. I was quite joyful, but had no way of showing it. Instructor H never told Quatre or the other pilots about the first four that had tried to pilot me. However, I know he thought it odd that I would only respond to Quatre.
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Weeks passed. I met up with Heavyarms and Deathscythe for the first time during those weeks. I caught glimpses of Wing and Shenlon on the news and, occasionally, in person. While all the other Gundams were nice (in a way), Deathscythe and I became more like sisters. The two of us could talk about anything. Mostly, we talked about our pilots. We told each other things that we never told anyone else.
"I have to admit that Duo's a little strange, but he's a nice fellah," Deathscythe told me, picking up on Duo's slight accent. "He calls himself 'Shinigami', a word he learned from Heero."
"Shinigami? What the hell does that mean?" I asked.
She laughed. "It means 'God of Death'."
I laughed as well.
"Yeah, well, that's Duo for you. He talks to me quite a lot also, like I could talk back to him. I wish I could. Anyway, I think it's kinda neat that he thinks of me this highly. I mean, Heero doesn't give a crap about Wing. He just sees him as an instrument of war. Shenlon is more than just slightly ticked at Wufei for calling him 'Nataku'!"
"I know! He rants long into the night about this! God, I couldn't STAND being 'parked' next to him in the last time we were at together!"
Deathscythe "grinned" at me. "Speaking of our male teammates, I heard that Heavyarms has a thing for you."
I moaned. "Heavyarms is nice, but he's just so...distant. He's exactly like Trowa."
Deathscythe gave me a slight nod. "Yeah, but I have a theory."
"I'm all ears."
"Picking up on human phrases, eh? Anyway, I believe that Heavyarms would act exactly like whoever is piloting him at the time."
"So if Duo was piloting him, he'd be hyper and talkative?" I asked with a laugh.
"Exactly!"
We both whooped with laughter. The Gundam in question gave us a funny look, but didn't say anything. Shenlon muttered something that sounded a lot like "women" and ignored us.
Finally, Deathscythe stopped laughing long enough to ask, "You know, I've been telling you a lot of things about Duo, but you haven't said anything about Quatre. So, what's he like?"
I hesitated. If I were human, I would've started to blush. She laughed at my obvious discomfort.
"What is this?" she asked teasingly. "Could something about the pilot Quatre embarrass the Gundam Sandrock?"
"No...it's more like the Gundam Sandrock being embarrassed by something towards the pilot Quatre," I admitted.
Deathscythe immediately asked, "You like him, don't you?"
"Who wouldn't?" I inquired, pretending to misunderstand the question.
She sighed in exasperation. "You know what I mean."
She was right. I sure did. I had a problem at the time admitting it to anybody, ESPECIALLY myself, so I just kept quiet. Deathscythe moved on to other topics.
You would almost swear that Deathscythe had, at some point in her life, been Duo's sister. She can talk for HOURS!
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2 weeks passed before Quatre and Duo decided to attack a base with vessels ready for transport to outer space, hoping to tip off the other Gundam pilots that they were supposed to go into space. We fought as best as we could. The only thing keeping us going was the fact that we both knew how important this was.
Well...for me there was something else. I didn't want to see Quatre get killed. I don't know if Deathscythe had an ulterior motive.
I finally fell to the ground, not able to take much more of the pounding. I had failed Quatre. Now both of us were going to die. Let me tell you something, AI's do NOT think of death all that often. To cease to exist is unthinkable. However, I knew that if something didn't happen soon, I would cease to exist.
"Come on, Sandrock! Stand up! It's too early to be defeated!" Quatre urged me.
He still hadn't given up! I admired his bravery greatly, but I know he was in pain, too. I felt it. That made me a little more determined to stand, but I could not. Not too long afterward, Deathscythe also went down. I heard her silent (to the humans at least) scream of pain.
"Are you okay?!" I called to her through a special communications link.
"I can't take much more of this!" she answered.
All this time, a single phrase, like a mantra, was chanted in my central processing unit:
"We're really going to die."
I felt Quatre struggle with my controls, trying to get me to stand up. However, the amount of ammunition hitting my back kept me from rising. That's when another Gundam stepped out of the flames. Shenlon! I was never so happy to see him!
"If this is all you've got, then Heavyarms, Wing, and myself shall take over from here," he told us.
"Give up?! And let you three bozos take over the job?! You'll get yourselves scrapped within a week without us!" Deathscythe snapped angrily.
"I knew you'd say that. What about YOU, Sandrock?"
I didn't hesitate. "For the colonies and freedom!"
'And Quatre,' I added silently.
He actually laughed as he continued to fight. The battle raged on. Duo and Wufei piloted Deathscythe and Shenlon over to where the vehicles for transporting mobile suits into space were kept. Quatre kept focused on the OZ troops. I had no idea what he planned on doing.
I heard Duo shout at Quatre when I realized that he was planning on staying behind to hold off the troops. It sounded like a good plan to me. After all, we'd be up in space soon after they went. Right?
Wrong. Quatre had other ideas. As soon as the other two were in their spacecraft, ready to take off, I sensed a sort of preparation. He was preparing for the end. Mine AND his.
"And now, it seems I have no other choice but to self-detonate," he murmured to himself. I heard him.
No, no, NO! He couldn't do this! He had a life to live! I would not let this happen! However, to do that, I'd have to break that rule again: never act on your own in front of a human. But I couldn't just let him die!
As he pushed the button for my self-detonation sequence, I paused the commands. I held the commands so I could get the message through to him. I raised my shield in front of my hatch, not wanting him to be shot or seen exiting me. I opened the hatch.
'Quatre, I'm sorry I failed you. Please go,' I pleaded silently.
"What's this?" he asked, shocked. "You want me to get out? Thank you, Sandrock!"
He jumped out of me, using the line to drop to the ground. It was almost like that first time. I walked forward, I had to put as much distance between him and I as possible. I walked towards the attacking OZ troops.
That's when I heard him say, "Thank you, my dear Sandrock."
"You're welcome, Quatre," I communicated to no one in particular, but nobody could hear me.
5 minutes later, he was taking off in a shuttle, headed for space. I allowed the self-destruct commands to continue.
I felt the pain of being destroyed, but the pain that hurt me the most was the knowledge that Quatre was still not safe. He'd been wounded so badly, he could die any day now. I prayed that someone would find him and help him. I also hurt from the knowledge that I would never see my handsome pilot again.
Boy. Was I ever wrong.
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I felt a slight tingle. Where was I? Did machines go to the Heaven humans believed in? Or was I in another place? Hell? Maybe. A void of non-existence? Most likely. My worst nightmare come true!
"That's it then," I heard a voice tell someone.
"Central processor working okay?" another voice asked.
I slowly began to regain my senses. Where the hell was I? I now knew I wasn't dead, but this was unreal!
"Yeah, the processor's working fine! Man, it's a good thing we were able to salvage it! It would've been a real pain to program all that stuff again! Probably would've taken a year or two!" the first voice answered.
'Humans...' I thought, realizing.
That's when I remembered it all. The base, the battle, ALL the battles, Inspector H (my "father"), Deathscythe (my adopted sibling!), Heavyarms (gag!), Wing (okay, I guess), Shenlon (somebody, please kill me!), their pilots (all scary. Even Duo. Major suicide complex here), and Quatre (the sweet guy who, I admit, also has a suicide complex). Oh God! Quatre! Where was Quatre?! Was he okay?! Or was he...? I didn't even want to finish that thought.
"Master Quatre will be pleased to see we have rebuilt his Gundam," a new voice joined in. This voice was deeper than the others. I smiled to myself. Rashid.
"Do you think that the Wing Zero will be eliminated soon? I don't like the idea of Master Quatre going toe-to-toe with that machine!" the second voice asked, changing the subject.
'Wing Zero?' I wondered. 'Who the hell is Wing Zero?'
Two things I love about having such a good communication system: no modem required for Internet access and faster-than-average access! I began scanning over news reports as I worked on another task: seducing the Maganacs' computer into allowing me to see the information. Deathscythe and I are irresistible to that playboy of a computer!
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"Are you SURE you can't let me in, Sweetie?" I asked, my voice as smooth as silk.
"I...uh...well...that is...um..." M-1 stuttered, weakening. He could be hard to get to release information. Even if he WAS a playboy.
"Please?" I purred.
His will broke. "Okay. Just this once."
"You're so sweet."
The newspaper and other reports had been sketchy on this mysterious "Wing Zero". I knew that M-1 or one of the other M computers would have more information. Also, Dr. J and the other scientists would have even MORE information, but their computers weren't working. I tried my "brother", Instruct-H, but he wouldn't open his files to me. All he said was that Quatre had looked at those plans himself and used them to build another Gundam.
I had felt like I would cease to exist when he said that. Quartre had forgotten about me? Instruct-H had quickly added that he still had been talking about me even AFTER he'd started building it.
I looked over M-1's information. I was completely shocked.
A colony had been completely destroyed by the strange Gundam's beam cannon. That and several other things. The pilot of Wing Zero had, at the time, been Pilot 04. Quatre.
"No...that's...not possible..." I whispered, horrified.
I read on about how Quatre destroyed OZ's 2 Gundams. I read that the Wing Zero's cockpit system made the pilot go into a sort of killing-madness. He possessed his own pilot! Quatre had been first, but other pilots quickly followed his example in piloting the insane Gundam. This was horrible!
Now, Quatre was returning home to me. Poor boy. I swore to myself right then and there that I would not let him down.
Briefly, a memory flitted through my mind. It was a conversation between Duo and Quatre...
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"You're pretty optimistic about all this," Duo commented.
"I just really think we're doing the right thing. We'll succeed if we keep this up," Quatre stated.
"What keeps you going, Quatre? I mean, you never seem to give up on this and always look for a bright future while the rest of us are just looking at the bleak present."
"A poetic description, Duo."
"Thanks! Just don't tell Heero! I DO have a reputation to keep!"
Deathscythe and I laughed along with the two boys.
Quatre finally stopped their laughter by saying, "Duo, many people say 'never again' during or after times of trouble. Most likely you've thought this phrase yourself at some point in time."
"Sure have," Duo interrupted.
Quatre continued, ignoring the interruption. "Well, I've heard a different phrase that helps during a fight: 'not this time'. Innocent lives have been lost, but not this time. People's homes have been destroyed, but not this time. The people have suffered, but not this time. That's the phrase that I truly believe in."
Duo stayed silent. Deathscythe whistled.
"Your pilot waxes philosophical," she noted.
"I guess so. That's what I love so much about him."
"And he doesn't look half-bad either."
I was about to retort when Duo said quietly, "That's really deep, Quatre. I guess that's what keeps you going, huh?"
Quatre nodded. "That and the want to protect my friends and family."
Duo smiled. "I hope I'm considered to be one of your friends."
Totally deadpan, Quatre replied, "No way. You're just an acquaintance."
There was little end to our amusement as Duo playfully chased Quatre around and around the hidden hangar.
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"Quatre, I know what you were trying to say," I said aloud, but nobody was listening to me. "I know what you meant."
Quatre's life has taken horrible twists and turns in the past few weeks. He made the Gundam Wing Zero in order to avenge his father's death, but ended up making a mistake. Hopefully, I will be able to prevent such mistakes from happening again.
That little boy I saved four years ago is still there. He's still my Quatre. I won't let darkness drag him down. Not this time. After all, you can never allow ill to befall your loved one. Even if he most likely doesn't love you back.
*AI = Artificial Intelligence
By Cybra
I would like to begin with a confession:
I'm in love with a mite.
Yes, a mite. A small, organic organism that invades a mobile suit or other machine's body and takes control of them. Those little creatures that use us to fight their wars and continue to kill each other. Most machines cannot stand them, some just obey, two...I suppose the word is "possess"...their pilots to destroy whatever is in their sight (Wing Zero and Epyon, obviously). I've obeyed and even done an "illegal" act: never act on your own in front of a mite.
I have been called by many names: "Prototype 04" in the beginning, just "04" by Oz, and "Sandrock", my favorite. However, I am still the same machine, or (as the mites would call me) AI.* I am also, as mites would say, female. Yes, there are differences between machines like there are between mites...but they are just for machines to know.
I should start my story at the beginning. The VERY beginning. Exactly 4 years before Quatre Reberba Winner became my pilot.
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Back then, I didn't really mind mites. I despised the fact that they could control me from the inside, but that was a mere setback. I had managed to become conscious all on my own, just like many other machines. However, after interfacing with the main computer of Instructor H's lab (Instruct-H), I learned what and what not to do.
I was Prototype 04 at the time. My body was fairly simple. Oh, sure I had weapons, but compared to my body now, it was ridiculously simple. Basically, I had been designed to test out a new type of cockpit. My body stood upright, like many mobile suits, and could walk easily around. I was only a little smaller than I am now, but my present body and my body back then are about the same size.
Instructor H had an assistant at the time. Roger Towning if I recall his name correctly which I know I do. Computers, unlike mites, can never forget.
Oh, blast it! I might as well stop talking like only computers will ever read this! Deathscythe would not be pleased with me if she knew I was writing like an ordinary computer! After all, WE don't refer to them as "mites" when we talk. We refer to them as what they call themselves, "humans".
Now, where was I? Oh yes, Roger Towning. He was a very...shall we say "ambitious"?...human. He believed that I should be in the war as soon as possible. He also despised a town near where I was built. The town leaders had "given him the boot" for his radical and insane ideas.
I was shocked when I felt my middle open up to allow a human inside. I scanned my interior and found Towning sitting inside of me, ready to power me up and get me moving. I had an idea of what his plans were. I was still newly conscious at the time so I had no way to prevent him from taking complete control. I obeyed his every command helplessly as he took me out of the hangar towards the town.
Mass hysteria followed quickly. The humans screamed as I destroyed their homes, powerless to override the commands. Not only was I not experienced enough to do it, but it was an unsaid rule among machines. You never acted on your own in front of a human! It might tip them off to a civilization that they had created.
Then, I spotted a human of 11-years old run out of a building I...no, TOWNING...was destroying. He tripped and fell down. He had a boyish face with blue eyes that were wide with fear...and astonishment when he saw us. His blond hair was dulled with dirt, which had gotten into it when he'd tripped. I gazed in wonderment at the human. I'd seen pictures of humans that young but had never seen one in person.
Towning ignored the fact that there was a human child gawking at us. He fired a round into the side of a building, trying to see if anyone else was inside. A large chunk of the side fell towards the ground. Towards the HUMAN.
The young human's back was turned to where the debris was coming down towards him. I panicked. How could Towning DO something like this?! I was astonished by my own reaction. I CARED about what happened to the human. Ordinarily, I wouldn't have given it a second thought, but in this case, I didn't want to see the child die!
I managed to take control of my hand and swung it down towards the ground. The blond human froze, then looked up to see his certain cause of death. He still couldn't move; he was too terrified.
"What the hell is wrong with you?!" Towning asked as he tried to regain control of my right hand.
I ignored him. My main focus was protecting the human child. I placed my hand over top of him, similar to the way Heero made Wing protect Relena from being crushed, and allowed the large chunk of debris to hit my hand, wounding me slightly.
The threat taken care of, I lifted my hand back up. The human child was now staring up at me. There was confusion in those beautiful blue eyes, but also a way of saying thanks. He didn't understand what was going on.
Towning tried to further destroy the town, but I finally had the will to override his control. I would not allow him to harm other human children. The authorities quickly came and took him away when Instructor H handed him over to them.
My creator removed my chips from the computer onboard, saving everything he needed when he needed to install information into Gundam Sandrock, my present body. I went into limbo when he removed me from my body. I found out later than he destroyed that body. I stayed in limbo for 4 long years.
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I awoke from my long slumber in a slightly larger body than what I was used to. A body quite powerful and strong. I was very pleased. This body would serve me well.
However, I remembered the boy as if he was standing right in front of me. The blond hair, the blue eyes, the boyish face were all engraved into my memory.
Which brings me to another confession I have to make:
I'm EXTREMELY picky.
Wing Zero will take any pilot that wants to fly him, the pilot obviously oblivious to the fact that the Gundam will take over him. Deathscythe prefers to have Duo in the pilot's seat, but will go with the flow. Heavyarms? He'll take any pilot and obey his every command. I, however, have shown how picky I am with the fact that Instructor H tried 4 times before Quatre to find a pilot to fly me.
Why did it take him so long to get to Quatre? The answer lies in the fact that I refused to fly with whoever they were trying next. The first 4 pilots weren't right for me. I felt that I would be unable to stand being piloted by any one of them. I knew the names of all the pilots that they had in mind. Quatre's name was 5th on the list. However, I didn't know who Quatre was at the time.
I refused to work properly whenever a pilot tried to fly me. Unfortunately, since the pilots had seen me, they were all eliminated. I didn't find out about that until much later.
Instructor H was becoming frustrated. I hated to let him down, but the pilot wasn't right. He could never understand. The other Gundams were mostly submissive when their pilots were chosen for them, but I continued to cause problems. He said I had a mind of my own. He has no idea how right he was.
One day, however, I heard Instructor H's voice call out, "Good morning, Quatre!"
I looked around for whomever he was talking to when I saw a 15-year old human with a boyish face, blue eyes, and blond hair. I immediately recognized him as the boy I had saved 4 years ago. If I was human, my heart would've beat faster. I know it sounds corny, but it's true. I was excited to see him.
"Good morning, Instructor H!" Quatre said, returning the greeting. His smile was bright.
"How are you and your father today?" my creator asked, coming into view.
Quatre looked at the floor. He looked sad, upset. I wanted to do something to make him feel better.
"Still fighting, I see," Instructor H noted.
"Yes." However, he looked up at me again. "Is this the mobile suit you were making?"
"Yes, it is. I call it 'Sandrock.'"
There was no way I could tell him that I was a female, not an "it". Very frustrating if you ask me.
"Sandrock..." Quatre repeated, allowing the word to roll around on his tongue.
Can we say "head over heels"? I loved the sound of my name spoken in his voice. I was, as humans would say, "sold" on the boy.
Instructor H very slyly asked, "Would you like to see what it feels like to pilot it?"
'Please say yes!' I begged in my mind.
Quatre's eyes glittered with excitement. "If it's not too much trouble," he said politely.
My creator motioned for the younger human to give it a try. I opened up on command like I always did. That's when I remembered that the Winner family was hiding us. Instructor H would be in big trouble if he had to kill Quatre because he'd seen me.
'No need to worry about it, father,' I thought.
Quatre sat down inside of me and adjusted the cockpit so he could reach everything. After familiarizing himself with my controls, he commanded me to close up. I complied easily. Yes. This pilot felt right. Instructor H raised his eyebrow in astonishment, but said nothing. Quatre moved my arms, made me walk, and even fired my Vulcan guns when my creator told him to. Finally, Instructor H told Quatre to step out of me. I was a little regretful, but easily opened up. Quatre jumped out of me, using the cord to keep himself from breaking his neck.
"Well, what do you think?" Instructor H asked.
"Sandrock is amazing!" he answered with a smile. I would've smiled with immense pleasure...if I could smile, that is.
"How would you like to pilot it? I need a pilot to fly Sandrock and fight against the Earthsphere Alliance."
Quatre thought it over for a moment, debating something with himself. Instructor H waited patiently. I waited impatiently, wanting to hear his answer.
'Please...'
He nodded. I was quite joyful, but had no way of showing it. Instructor H never told Quatre or the other pilots about the first four that had tried to pilot me. However, I know he thought it odd that I would only respond to Quatre.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Weeks passed. I met up with Heavyarms and Deathscythe for the first time during those weeks. I caught glimpses of Wing and Shenlon on the news and, occasionally, in person. While all the other Gundams were nice (in a way), Deathscythe and I became more like sisters. The two of us could talk about anything. Mostly, we talked about our pilots. We told each other things that we never told anyone else.
"I have to admit that Duo's a little strange, but he's a nice fellah," Deathscythe told me, picking up on Duo's slight accent. "He calls himself 'Shinigami', a word he learned from Heero."
"Shinigami? What the hell does that mean?" I asked.
She laughed. "It means 'God of Death'."
I laughed as well.
"Yeah, well, that's Duo for you. He talks to me quite a lot also, like I could talk back to him. I wish I could. Anyway, I think it's kinda neat that he thinks of me this highly. I mean, Heero doesn't give a crap about Wing. He just sees him as an instrument of war. Shenlon is more than just slightly ticked at Wufei for calling him 'Nataku'!"
"I know! He rants long into the night about this! God, I couldn't STAND being 'parked' next to him in the last time we were at together!"
Deathscythe "grinned" at me. "Speaking of our male teammates, I heard that Heavyarms has a thing for you."
I moaned. "Heavyarms is nice, but he's just so...distant. He's exactly like Trowa."
Deathscythe gave me a slight nod. "Yeah, but I have a theory."
"I'm all ears."
"Picking up on human phrases, eh? Anyway, I believe that Heavyarms would act exactly like whoever is piloting him at the time."
"So if Duo was piloting him, he'd be hyper and talkative?" I asked with a laugh.
"Exactly!"
We both whooped with laughter. The Gundam in question gave us a funny look, but didn't say anything. Shenlon muttered something that sounded a lot like "women" and ignored us.
Finally, Deathscythe stopped laughing long enough to ask, "You know, I've been telling you a lot of things about Duo, but you haven't said anything about Quatre. So, what's he like?"
I hesitated. If I were human, I would've started to blush. She laughed at my obvious discomfort.
"What is this?" she asked teasingly. "Could something about the pilot Quatre embarrass the Gundam Sandrock?"
"No...it's more like the Gundam Sandrock being embarrassed by something towards the pilot Quatre," I admitted.
Deathscythe immediately asked, "You like him, don't you?"
"Who wouldn't?" I inquired, pretending to misunderstand the question.
She sighed in exasperation. "You know what I mean."
She was right. I sure did. I had a problem at the time admitting it to anybody, ESPECIALLY myself, so I just kept quiet. Deathscythe moved on to other topics.
You would almost swear that Deathscythe had, at some point in her life, been Duo's sister. She can talk for HOURS!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
2 weeks passed before Quatre and Duo decided to attack a base with vessels ready for transport to outer space, hoping to tip off the other Gundam pilots that they were supposed to go into space. We fought as best as we could. The only thing keeping us going was the fact that we both knew how important this was.
Well...for me there was something else. I didn't want to see Quatre get killed. I don't know if Deathscythe had an ulterior motive.
I finally fell to the ground, not able to take much more of the pounding. I had failed Quatre. Now both of us were going to die. Let me tell you something, AI's do NOT think of death all that often. To cease to exist is unthinkable. However, I knew that if something didn't happen soon, I would cease to exist.
"Come on, Sandrock! Stand up! It's too early to be defeated!" Quatre urged me.
He still hadn't given up! I admired his bravery greatly, but I know he was in pain, too. I felt it. That made me a little more determined to stand, but I could not. Not too long afterward, Deathscythe also went down. I heard her silent (to the humans at least) scream of pain.
"Are you okay?!" I called to her through a special communications link.
"I can't take much more of this!" she answered.
All this time, a single phrase, like a mantra, was chanted in my central processing unit:
"We're really going to die."
I felt Quatre struggle with my controls, trying to get me to stand up. However, the amount of ammunition hitting my back kept me from rising. That's when another Gundam stepped out of the flames. Shenlon! I was never so happy to see him!
"If this is all you've got, then Heavyarms, Wing, and myself shall take over from here," he told us.
"Give up?! And let you three bozos take over the job?! You'll get yourselves scrapped within a week without us!" Deathscythe snapped angrily.
"I knew you'd say that. What about YOU, Sandrock?"
I didn't hesitate. "For the colonies and freedom!"
'And Quatre,' I added silently.
He actually laughed as he continued to fight. The battle raged on. Duo and Wufei piloted Deathscythe and Shenlon over to where the vehicles for transporting mobile suits into space were kept. Quatre kept focused on the OZ troops. I had no idea what he planned on doing.
I heard Duo shout at Quatre when I realized that he was planning on staying behind to hold off the troops. It sounded like a good plan to me. After all, we'd be up in space soon after they went. Right?
Wrong. Quatre had other ideas. As soon as the other two were in their spacecraft, ready to take off, I sensed a sort of preparation. He was preparing for the end. Mine AND his.
"And now, it seems I have no other choice but to self-detonate," he murmured to himself. I heard him.
No, no, NO! He couldn't do this! He had a life to live! I would not let this happen! However, to do that, I'd have to break that rule again: never act on your own in front of a human. But I couldn't just let him die!
As he pushed the button for my self-detonation sequence, I paused the commands. I held the commands so I could get the message through to him. I raised my shield in front of my hatch, not wanting him to be shot or seen exiting me. I opened the hatch.
'Quatre, I'm sorry I failed you. Please go,' I pleaded silently.
"What's this?" he asked, shocked. "You want me to get out? Thank you, Sandrock!"
He jumped out of me, using the line to drop to the ground. It was almost like that first time. I walked forward, I had to put as much distance between him and I as possible. I walked towards the attacking OZ troops.
That's when I heard him say, "Thank you, my dear Sandrock."
"You're welcome, Quatre," I communicated to no one in particular, but nobody could hear me.
5 minutes later, he was taking off in a shuttle, headed for space. I allowed the self-destruct commands to continue.
I felt the pain of being destroyed, but the pain that hurt me the most was the knowledge that Quatre was still not safe. He'd been wounded so badly, he could die any day now. I prayed that someone would find him and help him. I also hurt from the knowledge that I would never see my handsome pilot again.
Boy. Was I ever wrong.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I felt a slight tingle. Where was I? Did machines go to the Heaven humans believed in? Or was I in another place? Hell? Maybe. A void of non-existence? Most likely. My worst nightmare come true!
"That's it then," I heard a voice tell someone.
"Central processor working okay?" another voice asked.
I slowly began to regain my senses. Where the hell was I? I now knew I wasn't dead, but this was unreal!
"Yeah, the processor's working fine! Man, it's a good thing we were able to salvage it! It would've been a real pain to program all that stuff again! Probably would've taken a year or two!" the first voice answered.
'Humans...' I thought, realizing.
That's when I remembered it all. The base, the battle, ALL the battles, Inspector H (my "father"), Deathscythe (my adopted sibling!), Heavyarms (gag!), Wing (okay, I guess), Shenlon (somebody, please kill me!), their pilots (all scary. Even Duo. Major suicide complex here), and Quatre (the sweet guy who, I admit, also has a suicide complex). Oh God! Quatre! Where was Quatre?! Was he okay?! Or was he...? I didn't even want to finish that thought.
"Master Quatre will be pleased to see we have rebuilt his Gundam," a new voice joined in. This voice was deeper than the others. I smiled to myself. Rashid.
"Do you think that the Wing Zero will be eliminated soon? I don't like the idea of Master Quatre going toe-to-toe with that machine!" the second voice asked, changing the subject.
'Wing Zero?' I wondered. 'Who the hell is Wing Zero?'
Two things I love about having such a good communication system: no modem required for Internet access and faster-than-average access! I began scanning over news reports as I worked on another task: seducing the Maganacs' computer into allowing me to see the information. Deathscythe and I are irresistible to that playboy of a computer!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Are you SURE you can't let me in, Sweetie?" I asked, my voice as smooth as silk.
"I...uh...well...that is...um..." M-1 stuttered, weakening. He could be hard to get to release information. Even if he WAS a playboy.
"Please?" I purred.
His will broke. "Okay. Just this once."
"You're so sweet."
The newspaper and other reports had been sketchy on this mysterious "Wing Zero". I knew that M-1 or one of the other M computers would have more information. Also, Dr. J and the other scientists would have even MORE information, but their computers weren't working. I tried my "brother", Instruct-H, but he wouldn't open his files to me. All he said was that Quatre had looked at those plans himself and used them to build another Gundam.
I had felt like I would cease to exist when he said that. Quartre had forgotten about me? Instruct-H had quickly added that he still had been talking about me even AFTER he'd started building it.
I looked over M-1's information. I was completely shocked.
A colony had been completely destroyed by the strange Gundam's beam cannon. That and several other things. The pilot of Wing Zero had, at the time, been Pilot 04. Quatre.
"No...that's...not possible..." I whispered, horrified.
I read on about how Quatre destroyed OZ's 2 Gundams. I read that the Wing Zero's cockpit system made the pilot go into a sort of killing-madness. He possessed his own pilot! Quatre had been first, but other pilots quickly followed his example in piloting the insane Gundam. This was horrible!
Now, Quatre was returning home to me. Poor boy. I swore to myself right then and there that I would not let him down.
Briefly, a memory flitted through my mind. It was a conversation between Duo and Quatre...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"You're pretty optimistic about all this," Duo commented.
"I just really think we're doing the right thing. We'll succeed if we keep this up," Quatre stated.
"What keeps you going, Quatre? I mean, you never seem to give up on this and always look for a bright future while the rest of us are just looking at the bleak present."
"A poetic description, Duo."
"Thanks! Just don't tell Heero! I DO have a reputation to keep!"
Deathscythe and I laughed along with the two boys.
Quatre finally stopped their laughter by saying, "Duo, many people say 'never again' during or after times of trouble. Most likely you've thought this phrase yourself at some point in time."
"Sure have," Duo interrupted.
Quatre continued, ignoring the interruption. "Well, I've heard a different phrase that helps during a fight: 'not this time'. Innocent lives have been lost, but not this time. People's homes have been destroyed, but not this time. The people have suffered, but not this time. That's the phrase that I truly believe in."
Duo stayed silent. Deathscythe whistled.
"Your pilot waxes philosophical," she noted.
"I guess so. That's what I love so much about him."
"And he doesn't look half-bad either."
I was about to retort when Duo said quietly, "That's really deep, Quatre. I guess that's what keeps you going, huh?"
Quatre nodded. "That and the want to protect my friends and family."
Duo smiled. "I hope I'm considered to be one of your friends."
Totally deadpan, Quatre replied, "No way. You're just an acquaintance."
There was little end to our amusement as Duo playfully chased Quatre around and around the hidden hangar.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Quatre, I know what you were trying to say," I said aloud, but nobody was listening to me. "I know what you meant."
Quatre's life has taken horrible twists and turns in the past few weeks. He made the Gundam Wing Zero in order to avenge his father's death, but ended up making a mistake. Hopefully, I will be able to prevent such mistakes from happening again.
That little boy I saved four years ago is still there. He's still my Quatre. I won't let darkness drag him down. Not this time. After all, you can never allow ill to befall your loved one. Even if he most likely doesn't love you back.
*AI = Artificial Intelligence