Disclaimer: S.E. Hinton owns all of this. I do not.
Dropout
I never thought it would come to this. Really, I always figured I would stay in school because my parents wanted me to get an education. I knew I wouldn't go to college (they don't accept people as dumb as me) but I at least thought my parents would get to see me graduate. I was wrong. I didn't graduate, and my parents never saw me after one day. The day they died.
After that, I thought about quitting school for a while, but I always shook it off. I convinced myself that it was worth it, sticking in school, if only for the reason that I got to see my girlfriend everyday. Oh, yeah. I'm real motivated in the classroom. Not to mention I could actually watch my little brother's back and make sure the Socs didn't try anything around the hallways or out back.
But then came the accident, and everything changed. And not just for me, for all my friends, even though they were my parents. My older brother couldn't go to college anymore, we seemed to be swimming in debt, and he had to work two jobs just to put bread and water on the table every day. My younger brother was quieter than ever, secluded himself in his room practically right after school till dinner time, and I cried myself to sleep most nights for a while. Dallas got wilder because he didn't have my mom to stop him, and Steve didn't have any parents again. My dad had been like a replacement for his own—I hate to say it—worthless father. And Two-Bit…well, he lost some audience for his jokes. Darry also lost someone who was the closest he had to a best friend—our dad. We all lost a lot. And I lost the motivation to stay in school.
Sure, I knew Darry was going to be upset—he and Ponyboy really value education, but then again, smart people usually do. Me, the dumb one in the family, I really didn't care—but I was sick and tired of feeling stupid and being laughed at when I got another frickin' failed test back. And exams gave me a headache. And the studying? I so wasn't into all of that.
But when my parents had been alive, I really tried my hardest, just to make them proud of me, because they were the best parents I could ever have ended up with. And it just didn't seem to do any good, the trying. I slacked off in class, I failed. I paid attention and studied, I failed. I joked around with the teachers, I got detention. I shouted out an answer I actually knew, I got detention. I got in a fight at school, the principal. I got in another fight at school, they shipped me off to guidance. My memories of Will Rogers High School ain't exactly good ones. See where I'm coming from?
So when I made the decision to drop out, I had my reasons. And I had a pretty good argument stored up for Darry when I told him: I hated school, I was failing anyway, I needed to get a full-time job, and I could help pay the bills. One, two, three, PUNCH! What I hadn't expected was that I didn't need to argue at all. Because Darry didn't even yell at me. No, on the contrary, he seemed almost…glad? No, that wasn't it. But not angry. He rarely got angry at me, just Ponyboy. I think Pony was as surprised as me that Darry didn't holler at me.
"Dropping out?" was all he said, "Are you sure, Soda? You really should stay—"
"No," I interrupted him. "I want to do this, Dar. You saw my grades all those years, I'm an awful student. And we need the money…" this always got to Darry, weakened his resolve, because we were in too deep and he knew it.
"Okay," he sighed. "I don't like it, but it's your decision to make." I gave him a quick grin to reassure him. It seemed to work. It did on most things.
Ponyboy, now, he wasn't so easy to convince. But our talk didn't come until later, when we were in bed with the door closed. When Darry couldn't hear. This was when he would really open up, when it was just him and me.
"Soda?" his voice was timid. "Why are you dropping out of school?"
"Because I'm dumb, Pony," I replied, propping myself up on one elbow so I could see his face. He looked more serious than anything, and perplexed.
"No, you're not," he insisted. "You're one of the smartest people I know!"
Now I had to choke back a laugh. But it came anyway. "Then you definitely need to get out more, Pony." Then, seriously, "I'm not book smart like you and Darry. I don't know why we're so different, but we are. I like to do things, meet people, be up on my feet. In a classroom I can't do that. All you do is sit there! Come on, when does anything exciting ever happen at school?" Before he could say what I knew was coming, "And don't say books, Pone, because I know you like the people's adventures or whatever, but I really can't stand reading. At least not the books they make you read at school."
There was a pause. Then my brother's voice, half-heartedly, "Sometimes people get into fights at school."
I grinned even though he couldn't see me. It was dark, with only a beam of moonlight washing over one side of the room. "Yeah, which is the reason I'm not so excited to quit school. It's the one place I won't be able to watch out for you now."
"Yeah." Another pause. "Soda, who am I gonna eat lunch with?"
I bit back a wince. Ponyboy thought I was ditching him. Which I sort of was, but not on purpose. "Well, you've still got Steve and Two-Bit. And Johnny. Don't you and Johnny have some classes together?"
Pony shook his head. I could hear his hair rustle on the pillow. "Not anymore, since I got moved into some Socy classes, with all the academic people. Johnny's still in applied, 'cause the teachers at school think he's stupid."
"Oh, him too?" I said lightly, knowing it would at least make him smile. But it wasn't really funny. The teachers there—well, most of them anyway—went by your grades, and if you weren't doing so hot in that class, they held it against you. And the fact that we were also greasers, Johnny and I, might've had something to do with it too. Typical.
"Mmm-hmm," Ponyboy was getting sleepy, I could tell from his voice, and the length it took him to answer me each time. "Soda? Where are you gonna work?"
I had to think about this. "I dunno, Pony," I replied honestly, still wide awake. "Probably at the gas station with Steve, if they'll hire me. The DX, ya know?"
"Yeah. Hey, Soda?" I had to strain to hear his drowsy whisper.
"Mmm?" I mumbled. His tiredness was rubbing off on me now. But he didn't answer. He was already asleep. I threw my arm over him and rolled over, staring at the window where the moonlight shone in. I really was dropping out. I really was going to have to work every day now, just like Darry. Did I regret my decision? No, not really. I just needed to adjust to the idea.
Sandy wasn't thrilled either. Her reaction was similar to Ponyboy's. "Dropping out?" she exclaimed, her blue eyes wide in surprise. "For real, Sodapop?" she always used my full name, never shortening it to Soda.
"Yep," I answered, my thumbs hitched in my pocket as I leaned against the truck parked by her house. "Not going back on Monday."
"But why?" Sandy persisted. "Do you really hate school that much?"
I thought about this, mulling it over as she watched me intently. I didn't. Not exactly, anyway. "Not hate, Sandy," I told her finally, "Just bored of it. And sick of bringing failed report cards home to Darry."
"But Sodapop, when will I see you?" she asked, blinking innocently. I grinned. Funny how some of her thoughts were exactly the same as mine.
"Hey, I'll be around," I teased, "Just at a new address. The DX station with Steve. You should come see me sometime." She laughed, and that was that.
Having broken the news to the most important people, I was now completely done with school. Which made me the first person in the gang to do this.
I was the official dropout.
What can I say? I'm on a one-shot kick. Not a serious one this time, but I had fun writing it. But the important thing is, what did you think? Reviews appreciated!
