It's not everyday that Luna visits me. I can only ever remember going to her, to give her the supplies Sonata Tailoring was in need of.
That's why it was such a surprise when she turned up at my door towards the end of last year. Naturally, I let her in.
For a while, we sat there in silence, as if neither of us really understood why we were there. We were never really friends, so she couldn't have just come to me to hang-out.
Eventually, I broke the silence.
"So...Luna...What's brought you here?"
She paused to ponder for a second.
"I was looking for some advice..."
At that very moment, I felt as if something awful were about to happen.
And then it did.
"See, there is something I want to discus... Well, it's more like a question! Is it odd for a girl to ask a guy out?"
"Erm... I-" I hesitated, not quite sure what to say. I think, by that point, I knew who she was talking about. Just the thought of it broke my heart.
"Gill seems pretty distant. I think I need to make the first move!"
I heard that you're settled down. That you'd found a girl and you're married now.
I couldn't speak, I raked my brain for something to say. Nothing.
I heard that your dreams came true. Guess she gave you things, I didn't give to you.
She looked at me, straight in the eye, with a smug little grin on her face, as if she knew each, tiny thought that whizzed through my head, and was celebrating her victory already.
Old friend, why are you so shy? Ain't like you to hold back or hide from the light.
She knew. I don't know how, but she knew what my feelings for Gill were, and still are. But I wasn't going to let her win. I wasn't going to let her know that she'd crushed me with words alone.
"Go for it!"
It was Luna's turn to be gob-smacked, and her little grin faded away into her "innocent" little face. She looked at me in total awe.
Sometimes I wonder why I said those words.
And then I remember.
I hate to turn up out of the blue invited but I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded that for me, it isn't over.
I remember the way Gill's face would light up whenever Luna was in the room.
Never mind, I'll find someone like you. I wish nothing but the best for you too.
I remember the way he would talk about her, as if she was some angel.
Don't forget me, I beg. I remember you said...
I remember the way he smiled at the sound of her name.
Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead.
I'd do anything to see that smile, even if it meant I could never be his. No matter how cliché it sounds, I just wanted him to be happy.
And happy he was.
Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead.
I'd watch as they walked across the beach, hand in hand, with the two of them laughing at the slightest thing. She brought out the child in him, the child that had been locked away inside his head for far too long.
You'd know how the time flies.
I never saw one without the other, no matter where they went, as if they were joined at the hip, and yet, I could never bring it upon myself to trust Luna. His eyes shined whenever they were together. Her eyes were dull, cold, and loveless.
No, not quite loveless. There was love... for money, for reputation, for destroying me on the inside. I can't remember ever considering Luna a friend, but nothing could have prepared me for the evil inside Luna, it was as if the Witch Princess herself had control over the girl. Maybe on the inside there was the true Luna, someone sweet, happy and innocent. Or maybe there wasn't.
Only yesterday was the time of our lives.
But I couldn't bring myself to take what Gill thought he had away from him. A "perfect" wife, a beautiful baby girl, a promising future... Luna gave him far more than I ever did, or ever could.
We were born and raised in a summery haze, bound by the surprise of our glory days.
I was invited to their wedding, and arrived there alone, with an obvious look of sadness of my face, that the occasional person picked up on. I sat on the front row, wedged awkwardly between Candace and Mayor Hamilton
I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited but I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I'd hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded that for me, it isn't over yet.
There he was, with a glow to his face, Gill gazing into Luna's bright eyes adoringly. Part of me wished it was me instead of her. Part of me just wanted to cry. Another part saw Gill smile and was content with just that.
Never mind I'll find someone like you. I wish nothing but the best for you too.
The kiss. The kiss that sent the entire church off cheering and clapping. I just sat there, fighting back the tears.
Don't forget me, I beg. I remember you said...
Nine months passed. I did my best to avoid the couple at all costs, in fear of me doing something stupid.
Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead.
Then they turned up at my doorstep, with their new-born baby girl snuggled up in Gill's arms, to introduce me to baby Vivian.
Nothing compares, no worries or cares. Regrets and mistakes are just memories made
Luna just stood there, doing her pathetic little grin. I congratulated the pair and slammed the door in their faces.
Who would have known how bitter-sweet this would taste?
I think that's when Gill realized the truth, when he discovered why I was trying to avoid him. He realized I loved him.
Never mind I'll find someone like you. I wish nothing but the best for you too.
I recall hearing Luna laugh that cackle of hers. I recall the voice of Gill, full of concern.
Don't forget me, I beg. I remember you said...
I haven't seen that wretched family since, the family that totally and utterly destroyed my entire life, and my friendship with Gill.
Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead.
I'm not even sure if what I feel for him now is love... or hatred.
Never mind I'll find someone like you. I wish nothing but the best for you too.
I ruined everything by myself, with a simple, three-word sentence.
Don't forget me, I beg. I remember you said...
"Go for it!"
Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead.
Sometimes, wanting what you believe is best for the one you love, isn't always the best. For you. Heart-break is a sickness that can infect anyone, and there is no cure to the lethal disease.
Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead.