Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Stephanie Meyer.
A/N: This is my first fanfic ever. Actually my boyfriend broke his leg and can hardly move, much less do anything else(if you know what i mean). So this is my way to dealing with my uh 'frustration' so enjoy lol... Tell if u want me to continue this or if my writing sucks too much.
I can't sit still in the passenger seat, this is probably what 'being high' means. Its been half an hour but my heart is still racing and my head is still dizzy. I probably have mascara running down my face due to my happy tears but I don't give a damn, because i'm the happiest person on earth at this moment, because Jacob Black Proposed to me!
I look at the ring on my finger and a fresh flow of tears come out. I look at the big tan hand holding my small pale one, his thumb rubbing circles. I look at his big strong arms and know i'll be safe and happy forever and even more. I finally look at him and wonder how God created someone so beautiful inside and out. His soft brown eyes behind thick black lashes, windows to his soul which is just as beautiful as him. His broad lips from which no amount a kisses are enough. His heart of gold which belongs to me just like mine belongs to him, always.
I think he felt my eyes on him because he turned, cocked his head to the side "you said yes, you have to marry me now"
"thats why I said yes, why wont I marry you?" i said raising an eyebrow.
"maybe because, you've been crying the whole way since I proposed" he's teasing me, I know it, he knows it. But it works, I blush.
He lightly touches my cheek "You look ten times more beautiful when you blush" which makes me blush even more.
"Eyes on the road Jake" I playfully slap his hand away. Its always like this with him playful, real and natural. We are meant to be together, its written in the stars if not native american magic.
He smiles one of his smiles which can make a stone heart melt "Thats impossible when you are right beside me" my cheeks are possibly a nice shade of magenta by now. I look out the window willing my heart back into rhythm but the smile on my face is permanent, it might never come off.
"Here we are" he says turning off the engine and getting out. We are at his apartment. He comes around and opens my door before I get out. I can't help but giggle, Jacob is definitely a gentleman but not a one who opens doors.
"Thats unexpected" I say getting out of the car and taking his hand in mine.
He takes my other hand in his free one, brings both my hands up and kisses my knuckles all the while staring into my eyes "Tonight is special, I want it to be perfect for us...perfect for you".My heart which I willed back into rhythm started beating frantically against my ribcage, I'd be surprised if he can't hear it.
Did he mean what I think he meant? Because every time I pushed our physical relationship and asked for more, he always stopped saying that I'm too young or not ready. But I'm ready, have been from the first time he kissed me and told me he loves me. And I also have been extremely frustrated, of the sexual kind. How am I suppose to control my thoughts when he looks so god damn hot in his little shorts which are always hanging low on his hips and on top of that, the embarrassment when your mind-reading father is privy to them. So, I basically gave up the thought of 'sex before marriage' and convinced my self, physical cravings don't matter as long as we love each other. So I willed my hormones under control, even when his kisses make me want him like a woman wants a man, even when his not so innocent touches make me want to do unspeakable things to him, even when my mind tells me to tie him up and have my way with him.
So when he said those magic words, I couldn't help but be a little hopeful. I followed him into his apartment. He led me directly towards his bedroom, which is the place he usually avoids when I'm at his place. But when he opened his bedroom, I went from a little hopeful to whole lot hopeful.
His huge bed is covered with dark red rose-petals. There is only a single candle at the corner of the room since most of the room is flooded with moonlight coming from the glass doors which open into the balcony outside. Right now the doors are opened and a pleasant breeze is softly blowing the white curtains, making the setting look like something out of a fairytale. The room is filled with aroma of sandalwood, my favourite scent apart from Jacob's which is a mixture of pine trees, freshly mowed grass and first rain. But I ignored my prince charming and moved towards the balcony doors, the cool breeze helping my suddenly over heated skin. I looked up at the sky and prayed, coz if this is really happening, I have no clue what to do. The full moon gives me courage, because under it we shared our first kiss and it was perfect and what we're about share now, will be perfect. Although, I know this is bigger than our first kiss.
"er...Alice did this, I have know idea she's gonna do, this" I turned around and realised this is actually happening because Jacob's face is as red as the rose petals covering his white bed sheet and Jacob doesn't blush easy. So, Aunt Alice did this. I shouldn't be surprised since she made me wear ridiculously revealing lacy bra and thongs for this evening. When I asked her why, she winked and said she 'This is a special occasion, you need to be prepared', now I understood. At least i'm well prepared, I think.
"I can see, this has her name written all over it" I let out a nervous giggle. There is nothing funny about this situation but thats my failed attempt at diffusing the tension which hung thick in the room.
We just looked at each other for a long time, not moving, not even breathing. Then he slowly started walking towards me, looking gorgeous in his blue jeans and a white button down shirt which he wouldn't have worn on any other day. He cupped my face in his large hands, the warmth spreading till the tip of my toes.
He took deep breath "This doesn't have to happen now" He traced my lower lip with his thumb, I shivered "But, I want you to know i'm ready and I Love You more than anything in my life and i'll wait till you are ready too"
I looked at the beautiful man in my arms and know he's the only one i'll ever love like this. I'm nervous and I know he's nervous but I want this, I want him, every part of him.
"Jake...I never knew love like this existed till I loved you, my love for you keeps growing by each day and will always love you" my throat closed off, I think i'm starting to tear up again. He smiled lightly and gently brushed a tear off my cheek. I put my palm on his cheek and told him the only other way I know how, using my gift.
Jacob, I have been ready from a long time. I wanted you since the moment you kissed me. Every time you stop us from going further, it drives me insane! Your every touch makes my skin catch fire. Every night I thrash round in my bed, you think those are nightmares but its you. I almost cry in the morning when I realise its all a dream!Every time we are together, I feel its not close enough. Can't you see what you do to me? I want you Jacob...Every part of you, in every way...
I poured everything in my heart with that single touch. My most deepest, private desires. I looked into his eyes waiting for an answer, he seemed pretty speechless. I know girls don't blatantly admit they want to do it, even with their boyfriends. Does he think i'm too cheap or something?
"Ness..." his breathing is ragged, his heart beat is accelerated, his skin temperature is even higher than normal, his pupils are dilated. I know what all those all mean. He wants me as badly as I want him.
"I'm yours jacob, do you want me?"
"Oh god! Ness" he pressed me against a wall, I moaned involuntarily when his body made contact with mine "I want you so badly, I don't think i can control myself any longer"
"Then don't..."
He gently touched his lips to mine and that first touch is explosive because its going to lead to somewhere we have never been before and we are going there together. Thank god for the cool breeze because our bodies are heated up enough to combust. One hand around my waist and other around my neck, he took my lower lip between his lips and sucked deliciously and let it go with his teeth. I couldn't even bear to loose that second of contact with his lips, I quickly grabbed his lower lip with my teeth, hard enough to draw a little blood. I sucked on it gently and ran my tongue over it. He touched his tongue to mine, its hot, its wet and its the most mind blowing kiss we ever shared. Enough to make my knees buckle. If just kissing can do that, I can't imagine how making love to him will be. He caught my hips to steady me, I pulled him even closer till our hips collided. He groaned, I couldn't help but moan. His hardness is pressed against my heated core. I moved against him, desperate to find some kind of friction.
His lips separated from mine. We were panting. My brain is fuzzy probably from oxygen deprivation. He looked at me with unadulterated lust. Our hearts colliding against each other through our chests. He swept all my hair to one side so my neck is completely exposed, he bend down to suck on hollow at the base of the neck, my clavicle, to the highly sensitive spot at the base of my ear. I grabbed his shirt for support. He moved one hand which is resting on my hip, to the curve of my waist, slowly tracing to the side of my breast. He cupped my backside with his other hand, the same moment his bite my neck, the same moment he used his hand near my breast to trace my hardened nipple though my silk dress. The combined effect made me gasp.
He lifted his head up and looked at me in the eyes. He didn't look nervous anymore, he looked so sure. He took both his hands away. What? Don't stop now. But he put them back behind my thighs and slowly traced up, under my dress, which pooled near my hips. He grabbed my bare ass, and pressed his hardness into my panty clad centre. My eyes rolled back. I wanted more.
"See what you do to me honey" he said. I can feel him and it makes me proud. But I can't take his teasing anymore, I want to feel him without any barriers. "Tell me to stop now, if we go any further, I can't"
I don't want him to stop. I looked straight into his eyes, so full of love and lust "Jake, Make love to me"
He crushed his lips to mine urgently. This is nothing like the previous kiss. This is hungry and wild. He undid the zipper of the little, silk black dress and it immediately pooled near my feet. I stepped out of it. My bra and panties left very little to the imagination. Jacob never saw so much of me before, he had a very satisfied grin on his face. I walked towards him in just my underwear and stilettos.
"I love this colour against your skin" staring at my breasts which are in the danger of falling out of my bra.
"I know" I smiled. I grabbed his shirt, gave him what i thought is a seductive smile and started undoing the buttons wishing he was wearing his regular t-shirts, because this is taking too long. He must have thought the same thing because he started unbuttoning from below. The shirt is off and his beautiful torso is exposed, which is definitely a work of art. I traced my fingers across his chest, watching his nipples harden. Across all the planes and indents of his abdomen, where the muscles contracted and relaxed under my touch. Through the black trail on hair leading to what i'm most curious about. I started to unbutton his jeans, at the same time trail open mouth kisses through all the places my hands have been. His pants are finally undone exposing a growing tent in his boxers. I kissed him through his boxers. He cursed and lifted me up fast.
"Baby, you have no idea how good that feels" he is hyperventilating "but not tonight"
"But Jake-"
He grabbed me so fast and lifted me up, I hooked my legs behind his waist. He carried us to the bed and gently set me on it. He unhooked my legs behind him. He ran his hands along my legs and carefully removed each shoe. He threw them at the foot of the bed. He lowered his head down and kissed my stomach, once, twice and sucked on my belly button. I grabbed the white sheets, crushing a few petals probably. He started kissing along my stomach, he ran his tongue into my cleavage, the swell of my breasts falling out of my bra. I gripped the sheets tighter. His hands which are tracing patterns on my arms moved behind. He looked at me, tracing my bra hook. I nodded, he unhooked it easily. I sat up on his thighs and the bra fell between us. He is still looking at my face, but its only natural his eyes should travel down. Under the intensity of his gaze along with the cool night air my nipples hardened. He gulped, his adams apple moving up and down. If he doesn't say or do anything, i'll go mad! Just when I thought something is wrong and started feeling self conscious. He lifted his hand and traced one of my hardened nipples with his thumb. His touch is so gently and yet nerve endings are firing all over my body. He never touched me like this. This so new and I want his hands all over my body.
"I used to fantasise about you all the time ness" making eye contact again he took my breasts in his hands and started kneading my nipples. I'm trying not to whimper. "My fantasies didn't do you any justice, you are absolutely breath taking" he bent down and took my nipple in his mouth.
"J-Jake" he kissed, sucked and gently scraped his teeth down my nipples. When one is in his mouth, he played with other using his hand. I am moaning, whimpering and even trashing underneath him. Gripping the sheets and crying his name out. He moved to my stomach exposing my wet nipples to the cool air and hardening them again. He traced kisses down my body till he reach my panties, which are dripping wet with my need for him. He kissed both my hipbones. Hooked his fingers in the waist band and slowly removed them. I'm completely naked before him. He took my leg over his shoulder and started kissing my inner thigh. His kisses made me even wetter between my legs.
"you are so wet baby" he said licking my juices which are flowing down my thighs. He kept moving upwards, I didn't think he'll go there but when I felt his lips on my core, I involuntarily thrusted upwards. But he dint stop there, he spread my legs further apart and sucked on my engorged bundle of nerves.
"Oh God!" I screamed. That felt so good, like a little burst of electricity. If i was loud before, now i'm screaming. My screams seem to egg him on.
"Baby, you taste so good" he said. He kept flicking and sucking my clit and simultaneously inserted one of his long fingers into my opening.
"Oh Jacob" I didn't know my body can feel this much pleasure. Its like i'm climbing higher and higher. Jacob curled his finger and scraped my clit with hid teeth. "o-oh Please don't stop jake" but I don't know how much of this I can take. I feel like I might explode.
"Let go baby" he started pumping me faster and sucking me harder. Pinching my nipples with his free hand. Its like i'm dying but in good way, a very good way. " come for me ness"
And I did. Its like fell from a great height and got electrocuted. I kept screaming his name on and on. All the nerves in my body fired up. My body jerked, my toes curled. I tightened my legs around Jacobs head, who is licking away my juices. I gripped his hair so tight, I thought I might pull it out. I came down slowly my body relaxed , I never felt this good, ever. My heart slowly started beating back to normal. I pulled him up and kissed him hungrily, I can taste myself on his lips. I know I just had an orgasm but I never wanted him more. His hands and mouth are amazing but I want him inside me.