Okay, I've been working on this for a while. And I'm pretty far ahead with it. Hopefully you'll like it, Let me know what you think!

Summary: River Avery was struggling. Struggling to get by, struggling to make friends, simply struggling with herself. Will this weight-conscious young women allow a giant of a man to help her gain some sense back into her life when it seems like everyone else has fallen by the wayside? Or will she push him away the way she's pushed away the others?

Part 1

It's like you're screaming and no one can hear. You almost feel ashamed that someone could be that important, that without them you feel like nothing. No one will ever understand how much it hurts. You feel hopeless, like nothing can save you. And when it's over and it's gone, you almost wish you could have all that bad stuff back. So that you could have the good.

The laptop sat in the middle of the bed while a red haired woman sat in a chair across the room, staring at it as if the thing had done something wrong to her. She looked down at herself and the three long-sleeved shirts she wore underneath the two sweatshirts. She'd hide it somehow.

The women nearly jumped when the laptop signaled that she was receiving a video chat call. She knew who it was; he always called at the same time on Thursday nights. It was her only night off, every week. Video chat was the only way she was able to see them but mostly it was his way of checking up on her. She'd found a way around it though, a way to make him not worry as much. She started layering her shirts a few weeks ago, really that's all he could see other than her face.

When the noise rang through the room again, she quickly ran over to the bed and hit the button expecting to see the greatest man who has ever been in her life. But when the live video popped up, she was greeted by her second step-mother's face.

"Oh, hey 'Chelle," the women said, sounding defeated.

"Well, don't be so excited to see me River. Your dad will be here in just a minute, he just didn't want you to think he'd forgotten about you. It was his turn to clean up the kitchen and we ate supper a li'l bit late tonight," this 'Chelle' answered.

"It's not that I'm not excited to see you," River backtracked, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be rude."

"I know sweetie. You miss your daddy. I get it, but before he gets here," she smiled, "Real talk?"

"Yeah Michelle, ask what you want," River said, giving permission for her young and beautiful step-mother to prod into her personal life.

"How are you doing?" Michelle asked without hiding the concern for her oldest step-daughter, really her old step-child.

"I'm alright. I wish I had time to come home more, though. Everyone is gone now and I'm feeling all alone. Ya know? It was easier when I first started because I had my dad and Uncle Glen was here all the time too," River answered with a shrug.

"Why don't you try to make friends with more of the backstage staff? If you talk with more of the people you work with, it might be easier on you," Michelle suggested.

"I've tried, 'Chelle. It's hard when they aren't there every night. Every time we change cities, we change arenas, which means we change crews. There aren't very many head of crews like me and the few that are there don't like me because I know so many of the older wrestlers, which is like three. They think that I only have my job because of who I know-"

"That isn't true, darlin'. Don't matter what they think, we know the truth," a deep voice rumbled from Michelle's side of the call.

"Hi daddy," Rivers smile grew even larger when her jade eyes were mirrored back at her, "I miss you."

"I miss you too, darlin'. How's things goin' on that side?" her dad asked with his deep southern drawl.

"Things are goin'. I saw Uncle Paul earlier this week, he says the girls are doin' real good and so is Aunt Steph. He said to tell you 'hi'. Other than that, I work all day and try to sleep all night," she said, trying to give him a run down on her week since she last talked to him face-to-face.

"And what about food? Are ya giving yourself time to eat? Are ya eating the right amount and are ya keeping it all down?" he interrogated sternly.

River paused, not wanting to lie to her dad but also not wanting to make him worry. So many times he'd made it sound so easy to just order or make the food and put it in her mouth. And often times she'd succeeded in ordering or making the food, that wasn't the issue, she could get it in her possession whenever she needed to. The problem was putting it in her mouth and then getting it to stay there. It was a mental thing, a psychological thing, a self-esteem thing. She just couldn't breathe.

"Of course, daddy," she replied, smiling nervously and hoping he couldn't see through her lie.

His criticizing look told her differently though, "How many shirts are you wearing, River Avery Callaway?"

"Now, daddy, don't get upset. I was just a little bit cold," River stammered through another lie.

"How many?" he asked again.

"Five," she admitted after stammering through a few more excuses, "I'm sorry."

"Darlin'," her dad said, trying but failing to hide the disappointment in his voice.

"Mark, before you say anything, you should keep in mind that she is all alone on the road. She travels from city to city by herself and she hardly ever gets more than a day off at a time. We got more time off than that as performers," Michelle reminded him.

"How often are you eating, darlin'?" Mark asked, immediately going into father mode, "Maybe you should take some time off and come home to recuperate. I can talk to Vince for you if your boss gives you a hard time-"

"Daddy stop. I'm not taking time off," River said, "And I don't want you talking to Vince for me. I hate it when you do this, you can't run my life and expect me to be okay with it. You just said that I didn't get this job because of whom I know and that means I can't use who I know to get time off. It isn't fair to the other head of crews and it isn't fair to me. Daddy this is my job, what if your dad did something like that to you, how would you feel?"

Mark sighed heavily, "you're right, darlin'. I'm sorry; I'm just so worried about you. I don't want a repeat of what happened four years ago. That was the scariest time of my life; I don't want you to end up in the hospital again."

"I'm sorry daddy. The next time we come close to Austin I'll stop by home and we can do something together. Okay?" River suggested.

"That sounds like a good time. You should probably get to bed, darlin'. Don't forget to call your brother and sisters soon. And I'm sure your mom wouldn't mind hearing from you soon too," Mark said.

"I'll call Gunner and the girls tomorrow. If mom wanted to hear from me she would have done something different four years ago, daddy. She doesn't want to hear from me and if she does then she can ask Gunner for my number. She'll call when she's ready to talk to me," River told him, "I love you daddy."

"Love you too, darlin'. I'll call you sometime this weekend."

River agreed before ending the call and closing her laptop. She took a deep breath and walked into the bathroom. When she looked into the mirror, she saw everything she was trying to get away from. She didn't see what her dad claimed was there, or technically wasn't. She saw her real size and quickly stripped the extra shirts.

Thankfully, her dad hadn't asked about her medicine. She'd stopped taking her anti-depressants because she didn't believe she was depressed, just fat. And anorexic. Not depressed.