Today I lost my friend, the best friend I have ever had; heck, the best friend the Universe ever had, which makes his passing even more poignant than it already is.
He died as a result of doing what he does best -- saving lives and believing in peace, and did does Kelownan sons-of-witches-in-drag give him credit?! Did they hell! They tried to cover it up by accusing Daniel of sabotaging their research. If it hadn't been for him, never mind being six feet under, they'd be blown sky high.
That's what Daniel's life on SG-1 was about, although not solely, believe me. He was the pacifist, always looking for peaceful ways out of situations, rather than going in, guns-a-blazing. Ok, it was annoying and frustrating at times, but on the vast majority of occasions, he came up trumps, came up trumps big time.
From the moment I met him, I have watched him grow from a shy, floppy-haired guy, who couldn't even hold a 9mm, let alone fight, to a much more confident, shorter-haired man, with significant combat and firearms experience under his belt.
He was a great friend but, as much as I hate to write about him in the past tense, he is gone.
There hasn't been a memorial service and this upsets me greatly. How could you not celebrate this wonderful man's life? Everyone's carrying on like nothing's happened, when this very man gave us all our current assignment.
Four years ago, he unlocked the secrets of the Stargate in the space of two weeks, when it took Dr Langford's team two years and a heck of a lot of money, to come up with 'Star door'. If that isn't brilliance, then I don't know what is.
I don't know why we wait to tell people how we feel; I guess I just thought he always knew. And anyway, even if he did know, how could I hope to win his heart? Sha're is a tough act to follow, and I'm sure that if I was her, he wouldn't have chosen to die. He loved her; heck, he spent the first couple of years with us, searching the galaxy for her, and if that isn't commitment and love to a 't', you might wanna lower your standards.
I told him how I felt, yet he still went, which just goes to show that doesn't see me in that light, and never will. But that's ok -- 'eternally disappointed' is my middle name (Elizabeth is just so conventional), and to be honest, I would rather have him back, even if only as a friend.
Heck, if I had the faintest glimmer of hope that he was alive somewhere, I would give up everything just to find him. Friend or not, that man is the best thing that has happened to me, to the galaxy, and I'm not sure we should move on. How can we move on? He's done so much, more than anyone will in their lifetime, and yet we're meant to just say "Hey, he's dead, who wants to grab something to eat?"?!