Mom and Dad were spending the night at a hotel. Liv was spending the night at Andie's house. Parker was spending the night at Reggie's house. Joey was spending the night at Artie's house, despite their protests of our moms wanting them to bond. I was all alone. It felt pathetic being the only Rooney kid not at a sleepover.

Everyone knew I was upset and needed some time to myself, but I didn't think I would get the entire house to myself.

I was really missing Diggie. He was leaving for Australia soon. I was really wishing I could spend some time with him. Sure, we weren't dating anymore, but, we were still friends. And... I still loved him.

But I shouldn't be moping about thinking about Diggie. I should be doing something fun. Maybe Willow could spend the night. I took out my phone and called her. After the third ring, she picked up.F

"Hey, Mads," she said. "What's up?"

"Hey, Willow," I said. "I was just wondering if you were busy tonight? I thought maybe we could have a sleepover?"

"Is Joey gonna be there?" Willow asked eagerly.

"No, Wills, I'm home alone. Joey's at a sleepover somewhere else."

"Oh. Um, Maddie I just remembered I, um... I'm busy tonight with, um... drum lessons."

"Willow you just said the word 'um' three times; I know you're lying to me."

"But, Maddie, Joey's not gonna be there!" she whined. "And I want Joey! And Willow always gets what she wants!"

"Yeah, and if you still come over, all we'll talk about is how much you love Joey! It's always about Joey! I was never this bad about Diggie when I was in love with him!"

"I can't help it if he's super cute!" Willow defended.

Not saying anything, I hung up. There was no point in continuing the phone call if she wasn't coming over.

I left my phone on the coffee table and ran upstairs to my room. I sat in the window seat and looked outside. The sun was setting. It was beautiful. I knew that I would have an even better view of it from the basketball court. Not only that, but that hoop was calling my name. I decided to go shoot some hoops before it got too dark. I put my jacket on and went outside.

I grabbed a basketball off the rack. Then I suddenly remembered that this was the place where Diggie and I broke up. I tried to fight off the memories, but they still came; bits and pieces of the break up flooding my mind.

"Um... I'm really happy that you're so excited about going to Australia," I set my basketball down.

"Yeah," Diggie said. "I am, too. I-I can't wait to, like, see the-"

"But I really, really, really, really, really, don't want you to go."

I sat down on the red deck chair, firmly holding the basketball.

"Why are you being like this?" Diggie asked.

"Because you left me for eight months!" I shouted, my eyes filling with tears. "And I waited for the day that you were gonna come back and now you're just telling me that you're taking off again?"

I sighed and titled my head back, hitting the wood of the chair.

"This isn't really making me wanna stay, Maddie!" he shouted.

"Then go!" I shouted back.

"I will!"

I looked down at my jacket and sighed. I missed wearing Diggie's Letterman jacket.

"Maddie, maybe we should break up."

There was a silence between us.

"Wow," I said. I began to take off the Letterman jacket. "Okay..." I held out the jacket and began fighting tears as he took it.

"Okay," he said quietly, before saying, "See you around, Rooney." and walking away.

Tears filled my eyes.

I picked up my basketball and threw it at the rack, knocking it over. I started to cry.

I stood up and put the basketball on the rack. I decided to shoot hoops in the morning. I sat back down on the chair and cried as hard as I did when we broke up. I missed him. I wanted him back. I didn't want him to go to Australia. I cried until the sun disappeared. I looked at the sky for a very long time. It looked really pretty. The bottom was a mix of pink, yellow, orange, and purple, and the top was blackish blue with a few stars already starting to come out.

I shivered. The disappearance of the sun had made the atmosphere cold. Diggie's Letterman jacket was always so nice and warm. My jacket was a blue crop top jacket where the bottom goes over my bellybutton and the sleeves go down to my elbows.

I went back inside. I changed into my basketball jacket so I could warm up and went downstairs. I sat on the couch and grabbed my phone off the coffee table. Eight missed calls. Three from Willow, obviously wanting to talk about Joey. Five from... Diggie? My jaw dropped. Diggie called me? I should have taken my phone with me! I could have told him how I felt.

I heard a knock on the door. Who could that be? I got up and opened the door to see...

"Diggie?"

"Hey, Mads," he said. "You okay?"

I crossed my arms and tried to play it cool. "Yeah, I mean, um, why wouldn't I be okay?"

"I called you several times and you didn't answer."

"I was shooting hoops," I explained.

Okay, that kind of was a lie. I was crying over the boy that's currently standing in front of me, but shooting hoops was what I was what I intended to do. Besides, why would I tell Diggie that I wanted to get back together with him a week and a half before he leaves?

"Have you been crying?" Diggie asked me.

I put my hand on the doorknob and shifted my feet. "Nooooo..."

"Don't lie to me, Rooney."

"Well, so what if I have? You're my ex boyfriend who's getting ready to fly overseas to Australia. To me, Australia sounds like a much bigger deal than a teenage girl crying."

"Maddie, what's going on?"

I looked down at the floor, avoiding eye contact. Diggie caressed my cheek like he used to when we were dating. He titled my head up so I couldn't look away from him. I looked into his eyes.

"Tell me what's wrong. I might not be your boyfriend anymore, but I'm still your friend. You can talk to me, Mads."

I wanna get back together with you! I thought. I still love you! I don't want you to leave! Please, tell me you'll stay!

A fresh stream of tears ran down my cheeks. I tried to stop them, but I couldn't. I closed my eyes shut to block them off, bit they still managed to get through.

"Maddie?"

I tried to talk to him, but nothing could come out when I opened my mouth.

I took off my glasses and covered my face with my spare hand. I don't think Diggie's ever seen me cry, besides when I blew my knee out. I was emotional during our fight, but I didn't start crying until after he left.

Diggie picked me up bridal style and placed me on the couch. He knelt down beside me on the floor.

"What's the matter, Rooney?" Diggie asked.

I took a deep breath. "I've really missed you, Diggie."

Diggie sat next to me and wrapped his arms around me. "I've really missed you, too," he said. "I'm sorry I broke up with you."

"I'm sorry I didn't support your wanting to go to Australia."

"Maddie, will you please give me another chance?" I nodded. He smiled. "Thanks, Rooney."

I smiled. "You're welcome."

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

Diggie looked around. "Joey's not here, is he?"

I snorted. "No, he's gone. He and Artie are having a sleepover, I thought you knew."

"I didn't. But, that's good because I've been waiting for this for a really long time and he always ruins it." He grabbed my chin and leaned forward.

I closed my eyes. Here it comes. Our lips gently touched. I started to feel dizzy. We pulled apart. I smiled. And everything went black.

I woke up in my room with the lights turned off and the blankets tucked tightly over me.

Was it a dream? I thought. Please tell me it wasn't a dream!

My worries were put at ease when Diggie poked his head in the doorway. When he saw me, he smiled.

"Feeling better?" he asked.

I nodded and sat up.

Diggie turned the lights back on and sat next on the foot of the bed. "You okay?"

"Yeah," I said. "I guess I was just kind of overwhelmed. I never expected our first kiss to be like that. It was pretty great."

Diggie moved closer and kissed me passionately. He put one hand on my neck and the other on my cheek. I got out from under the blankets and kissed him back with the same passion. I put my hands on his shoulders. I realized I was getting carried away, so I pulled away and blushed.

"I want to give you something, Rooney," Diggie said. "It's kind of an 'I'm sorry' gift for everything that happened between us."

"You don't have to apologize, Diggie. It's my fault, too."

"I still want to give you something."

"What is it?"

"This."

Diggie gave me a third kiss. This time it was a French kiss. He was quite the kisser. So that must have meant that ours wasn't his first kiss. But it was mine. And I was loving it. I opened my eyes for half a second to see that Diggie was taking off his Letterman jacket. He grabbed the bottom of his shirt and I pulled away.

"Whoa, Diggie, we just had our first kiss and we just got back together after a three month long breakup. Let's not take this too far."

"But this is my gift," Diggie explained.

"I know and as sweet as that is, I'd rather wait until marriage."

"Why?"

"Well, my parents might find out and then I'll be in big trouble. And if I get pregnant, then they'll definitely find out and I'll be in huge trouble."

"They're not gonna find out. I've got this under control, Mads. Everything's gonna be fine."

Diggie took off his T-shirt, revealing all his muscles.

"Diggie," I whispered. "Please don't."

Diggie took off his shoes and socks. He was about to take off his jeans, but I put my hands on his shoulders and made him face me.

"Diggie, don't. I am begging you, please don't."

Diggie put his hand on my cheek. "It's okay."

"Diggie..."

Diggie took off his jeans, along with his boxers. I looked away. Diggie was completely naked.

He looked at me and smiled. "Now, it's your turn."

"No!"

I got up and tried to run away, but Diggie grabbed my wrist and pulled me back onto the bed.

"Maddie, it's okay. Everything is under control."

Everything is out of control! I thought.

"Diggie, please don't do this," I continued to beg.

"Here, Maddie, I'll help you."

"I don't need help!"

Diggie pinned me down and pulled my basketball jacket and T-shirt off. I tried to get free, but he was so much stronger than me. He took off my socks and my sneakers. Then he took off my jeans. He took off my underwear, followed by my bra. Heck, he even took out my ponytail.

"Diggie..."

"Shh... It's okay, baby." He kissed my mouth, cheek, neck, and the space between my breasts.

Wait... We just got back together and he's already calling me baby? And now we're naked on top of my bed? This was insane.

"See, Maddie? Everything's fine."

He kissed my neck again. I tried to escape again, but Diggie was still on top of me. So when I moved we both fell on the floor. Our legs were still up on the bed, while the rest of our bodies were on the floor. I hit my head pretty hard. Half the room went black. The room started to spin. I could see stars and my ears started to ring. I let out a small moan of pain, but Diggie didn't notice. I finally regained full consciousness after a few seconds.

We were interrupted when Diggie's phone started to ring. Diggie sighed, and finally got off of me. As soon as he did, I jumped onto my bed and covered myself with the blankets.

"Hello?... Oh hey, Mom... Where am I? I'm at Maddie's house. We just got back together. Isn't that great?... I have to come home? Why?... Oh, I didn't know it was past curfew. Sorry, Mom. We were just having so much fun, I guess I lost track of time... Yeah, I'll be home soon... I love you, too, Mom. Bye." Diggie hung up. "Sorry, Rooney, I have to go."

"Don't be sorry... Seriously. Don't."

Diggie put his clothes back on and kissed my cheek. He smiled. "See you later, Rooney. I had fun." Then he left. I listened to him go down the stairs and out the front door. I heard the engine of his car and the sound got quieter as he drove farther away.

When the sound was completely gone, I tucked my knees into my chest and started to cry. I couldn't help it. We just had sex. Wait, no... I wasn't doing anything. Diggie had raped me. If Diggie hadn't gotten that call from his mom, who knows what else would have happened? I took a deep breath.

"Thank you, Mrs. Smalls," I whispered, tears rolling down my cheeks.

When I was done crying, I got my pajamas and went into the bathroom. Even though I was home alone, I still locked the door. I wasn't taking any chances. I took a very long shower so I could think about what just happened and cry more without staining my face with tears and getting red eyed. When I got out of the shower, the mirror was fogged up. I looked at my blurry reflection for a very long time. I put my finger on the mirror and drew a smiley face over my face's reflection. I would have to fake my happiness from now on, because I wasn't going to be happy for a really long time.