The idea for this story came to me when I was planing chapter 7 of my story „Happy Endings". There were so many possibilities to go with that episode then and it was a close call between this one and the one I actually wrote.

In the end the decision was made on my feeling that this would do nicely as a multi-chapter story, so here it is; I hope you'll enjoy it! (A M-rated version can be found on AO3)

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Love Hurts

Will was pacing back and forth on his terrace, a drink in one hand, his phone in the other. He was so anxious that he could not stand still, which resulted from being on a high from the weed-laced cookies he had eaten earlier that night, the adrenaline the Bin Laden broadcast had rushing through his veins as well as the couple of drinks he had already had before this one. And last but not least his nervousness about what he had done.

Why didn't she call him back? And why the fuck didn't she answer her phone in the first place, especially on a newsy night like this? She always had her phone with her, so where was she that she hadn't answered it?

He gulped down the rest of the Scotch. Surely she wouldn't take the out he had given her, simply not reacting to his voicemail he had left when she didn't pick up the phone? Could he have read her so heavily wrong, misinterpreted all the signs she had given him over he past year? Had he just seen what he had wanted to see?

Call, Mac! Call me now or I'll be going insane here!

Going back into the apartment to refill his glass he stopped and looked over to the kitchen. Another cookie sounded right about now, and he was grateful that Kaylee had brought such a large batch. If Mac wasn't about to call him back he really needed another pick-me-up.

Nibbling on the third cookie of the night Will felt the giddy excitement that had filled him since he had left his message for her, expecting her to call him back immediately, slowly subside, and a vague hint of anger starting to pool in his stomach.

How could she just not react to what he had said? Didn't she know how much courage it had taken him to call her in the first place? That he would be up all night waiting and brooding about what she was going to do? What he was supposed to do now?

Hell he did not want her to ignore his words, no matter what he had told her.
Call, Mac!

After having finished the cookie he went over to the bar for another Scotch and then settled on the couch, lost in thought and starting to get bitter.

Damn, he shouldn't have said anything, now he was only up for more hurt and rejection. Why didn't he just keep his big mouth shut instead of putting everything on the plate? They'd had a good few months lately, why didn't he just let it roll? Fuck... Will let his head fall against the back of the couch and ran his hand over his face. Fuck, fuck, fuck...!

He had blown it, it was as simple as that. He had definitely done the wrong thing and now he had to figure out a way how to face Mac tomorrow. God, that would be incredibly embarrassing; what should he say? How could he look her in..."

Suddenly the door bell rang and Will jumped in his seat.

Mac? Could that be her?
He took a deep breath. Of course, she wouldn't call, she would rush over, would confront him face to face. He should have known instead of panicking!

Will immediately got up, all tension already vanished. Fully aware that his movements weren't at all smooth anymore but satisfied that he was steady on his feet he walked over to the intercom and pushed the button. „Yeah?"

„It's me. Let me up." Mac sounded a little breathless but was clearly intend on wasting no time, so Will pushed the button and then waited for the elevator doors to open. When he realized that he was still holding the glass in his hand he quickly walked over to the end table nearby, put it down and resumed his former position, nervously running his hand through his hair.

After what seemed like an eternity the doors opened and Mac stepped into his apartment, wearing tight jeans and a stunning leather jacket which both accentuated her incredible figure. Will let his gaze roam along the length of her body, barely holding back a groan, before looking at her face.

Mac had stopped a few feet in front of him and her eyes were wide while a slight blush covered her cheeks. Nervously she wrung her hands and tried to speak a couple of times before actual words made it out of her mouth.
„Will...? What... I... Are you still high?" The question sounded desperate; obviously Mac didn't know what to make of the message he had left for her.

„No..."
Well, he wasn't... Not really anyway. He knew what he was doing, but she better didn't hear about the third cookie he had just eaten and the drinks he'd had. He took a step towards Mac and lifted his hand to follow the contours of her face, but after a moment she stopped his fingers with her own hand. She needed to be sure and spoke with a trembling voice.
„Will? Did... did you really mean what you said in the voicemail message?"

Her eyes showed a mixture of hope and longing, but also confusion, angst and suspicion. She clearly wasn't sure if she could trust him after everything he had said and done to her over the last thirteen months, escpecially knowing about his drug-induced high earlier this evening.

Will smiled at her. „I have never meant anything more in my life, Mac. I love you."

Slowly Mac started to relax and a smile showed on her face, tentative at first but then growing bigger until her whole face lit up and it reached her eyes. God, she was so beautiful!

„Oh Billy..."

Not willing to wait a moment longer both of them closed in until their lips met for the first kiss in more than four years, and it was everything he had dreamed it to be and more.

Soft at first he tried to relearn the feel of her lips while he cupped her face and let his finger slide through her open hair. Soft, so soft and she still smelled and tasted like he remberered, something he had never managed to forget, no matter how hard he had tried.

God, this felt so right. He should have gotten high months ago; suddenly everything was so clear, and all anger, frustration, confusion and hurt inside him had just disappeared.

Mac melted into him and he deepened the kiss, explored her mouth with his tongue until he drew the first moans from her. Her hands had slid around his neck and mussed his hair, but then she broke the kiss and took a small step back. „Are you sure, Will?"

„God, yes..." Will's face showed all his desire. „Are you?"

With a coy smile Mac lifted her hands, pulled her jacket down from her shoulders and let if fall onto the floor, right in front of the elevator door. Without breaking eye contact her plain white t-shirt followed next before she opened the button of her jeans to pull them down, while Will could only watch, unable to move.

Only dressed in her bra and panties she closed in to whisper „I am so ready..." into his ear, before she took his hand and led him after her to his bedroom. Under dimmed lights she stopped in front of his bed and turned around, Will's hands immediately back on her hips and his eyes scanning her body. They clouded once his gaze fell onto the scar on Mac's stomach, and he moved one of his hands to touch it with his fingers.

Finally he whispered. „I heard about it... I am so sorry, Mac..."

He swallowed hard, but she took his hand and interlaced their fingers. „Let's talk tomorrow, Billy... I love you so much, and right now I just want you. I have waited for so long..."

Will looked up and met her eyes, before he nodded.
Letting go of his hand she now started to open the buttons of his shirt, nervously biting her lip. While he then got rid of his pants and took off his socks, she quickly pushed down her panties, opened her bra and haphazardly threw both to the side.

Their love making was passionate, something they both had missed for so long, and neither of them wanted to stop, nor could stop.

Completely exhausted Will finally slumped into Mac and gasped for air. Just like him Mac had closed her eyes and only gradually let her legs glide down. Letting her hands run up and down his back she finally took a deep breath and whispered into his ear. „I love you, Billy."

The only reaction Will managed was a low grunt. He was spent and his adrenaline high was quickly wearing off. With a last shred of energy he rolled off Mac onto his back and pulled her with him. Too tired to talk he pressed a kiss to her head on his chest and with a sigh both of them were slowly drifting off to sleep.

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The next morning Will woke up, and while being oddly relaxed he had a splitting headache at the same time. Already with closed eyes the bright sun falling in through the bedroom windows felt like piercing little arrows.

Groaning he softly rubbed his eyes before slowly opening them. He felt miserable, but nevertheless he cautiously sat up, trying to think back.
Last night. The Vicodin. The cookies. Then the broadcast and after that another cookie. And alcohol... Fuck... He could have guessed that mixing all that hadn't been a good idea...

He should go to the kitchen and make some coffee, maybe that would help against the throbbing ache in his head. With another groan he got up and noticed that he hadn't even put on his pyjamas the night before but had slept naked. Carefully he bent down to pick up his boxers and slid them on before slowly going into the kitchen. He felt like walking through a cloud that not only seemed to hamper his ability to think but also made it difficult to walk straight.

With measured movements he turned on the coffee maker and got a mug out of the cupboard. He really should have refrained from eating that last cookie after coming home last night, then maybe today he would not...

Suddenly he felt someone snuggle against his back and hands trail around his waist to stroke up his naked chest. „Good morning, Billy." The voice was sultry and a kiss was placed on his shoulder blade. „How are you feeling? Has your high worn off completely?"

After an initial startle Will froze and forgot to breath for a moment at the touch and the sound of this all too familiar voice. What the fuck was Mac doing here? Touching and kissing him?

He didn't answer her, suddenly about to hyperventilate. What had happened?
Slowly he took her hand and moved it from his skin. In turn Mac stiffened and moved a step back, feeling that something was not as it was supposed to be. After a moment in which Will hadn't moved she spoke.

„Has your high worn off? Did you realize what you said last night and want to take it back?"
Her voice was trembling and she wished she could turn invisible. She had completely opened up last night; she had surrendered herself to his forgiveness and her own feelings, trusting that he was sure about them, and now it had all been a ruse?

„Mac..." Will didn't move and his fingers clenched around the coffee mug he was holding in his hand. The voicemail message... How could he have forgotten that? Fuck!
Mac showing up later that night after he had convinced himself that he had made a fool of himself. Them making love, something he had wanted so badly for so long already and especially as soon as he had laid eyes on her last night...

„Turn around, Will... Please..." Mac needed to see him, see his eyes.
When he slowly did they didn't show any sign of coldness or maybe even amusement at how he had played her as she had almost expected, but an expression of pain, mixed with confusion and sorrow.

After what felt like an eternity, their gazes never swaying, she gripped the towel she was wearing to keep it up over her breasts and quietly asked. „Did you mean it? Did you mean anything you said last night?"

Still overwhelmed by the whole situation he searched for an answer, before he suddenly burst out. „God yes! But... it...I think I could only say it because I was high..." Seeing the devastated and horrified look on her face he took a deep breath, but before he could say anything a neutral mask seemed to replace the previous expression and she stepped further back.

„Mac, I'm..."

„Don't... Don't talk to me!"
Her voice was harsh, but still carried her pain, and turning around she gathered her clothes from where she had dropped them the night before to go back into the bedroom.

When she returned only a couple of minutes later Will hadn't moved, scared to death about what had happened. He tried to speak to her again and hold her back, but Mac just shook his hand from her arm and walked towards the elevator, not letting him see her face. When she had pushed the button though she turned around to look at him, and he cringed at the disappointment, hurt and, yes, defeat he saw in her eyes, which were rimmed with tears.

He just wanted to move and try to talk to her once more, when the elevator opened and Mac disappeared inside.

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To be continued