"Oh, this world is but a rude world, and hurts a thing so fair"

-John Clare, A World For Love

"It's nice, isn't it?"

All she sees is a red light burning through her eyelids. She's biting her fingernails out of nowhere because she feels nervous hearing those words because this is it. This is her new home, and at first she didn't care but now she's afraid.

Clare doesn't reply and stares out at the window and the trees that are turning into black blurs every second.

"I'm telling you, I can see us being really happy here. I loved this place when I was a kid." says Helen softly.

"You've told me before," replies Clare crossly, wanting to end the conversation.

She doesn't know where her anger is coming from, but she's extremely annoyed right now and talking is only making things worse.

Helen keeps her eyes on the road, occasionally stealing side-glances from Clare. She doesn't speak anymore and the silence that is present is too uncomfortable that it leaves Clare wanting to open the car door and jump out.

After a while, she decides that it is best to stay quiet and ignore everything. Clare closes her eyes and she sees that red light once again.

.

.

Someone is shaking her and, out of instinct, she slaps them in their arm. When she opens her eyes, she sees that it's Helen and her eyes are red. The guilt is just starting to kick in and Clare feels that it's overwhelming her.

"You've been asleep for a couple of hours. Everything is already set, you can go in, and sleep."

"I could have helped." says Clare quietly.

"You weren't in such a great mood," mutters Helen, "besides, everything was set since last week."

She feels as if she is going to burst into tears because she knows that it's her fault for getting that type of reaction. Things aren't the way they used to be and she can't stop looking back in the past. It's the damn temptation that always bothers her in the end.

"Come on, I want you to see the house." says Helen calmly, walking ahead.

Clare gets up from the car and she feels as if nothing is the reality she was accustomed to. Everything is different. Everything is simpler. And this new place has a smell of roses and pinewood. When she realizes that she had been staring too long, she feels as if someone is staring at her.

There. From across the street, is a girl on her porch wearing sunglasses. Clare can't tell if the girl is looking at her or at another direction, but her face is pointed towards her. The girl smiles.

Clare smiles back, but it's forced and unwelcoming.

Things get awkward quickly by just a single stare, and Clare feels that she has no choice but to walk straight inside the house.

"I called your father and told him," struggles Helen with something, "-I told him that we're here already." yells Helen from another room.

Clare looks around before following her voice and reaching what seems to be the dining room.

"Well, do you like it?" sighs Helen, holding a vase full of the same flowers Clare saw outside.

"I don't know." shrugs Clare, and she raises her gaze at Helen, the tension is almost gone.

"What do you mean?"

"I've been here for two minutes, I can't tell," scoffs Clare.

Helen pauses and her stare is listless, lifeless. The tension is back and Clare wants to scream, do something, anything to get out of the room. It's her fault again.

"I'm talking about the house, Clare!" erupts Helen, and sets the vase on the table with a loud thump, "I just want to know if this is okay? I want to know if you'll be okay with this!"

"Yeah-yes." starts Clare, but her voice gets quieter, "I like it. Thank you."

Helen lowers herself to a chair nearby and sits down, Clare inches closer to her but stays still.

"Sorry, sorry." blurts Helen, rubbing her head, "I know the divorce has been hard on you, but I need a fresh start and I know you do too."

Clare winces but keeps her posture straight. All she can think about is KC Guthrie and his smile. She thinks about his voice and his way of talking to her and asking her if things are alright. But that only makes her feel worse. Nauseous, even.

"All I'm asking is for you to give this place a chance. For us."

"I will." replies Clare.

Helen smiles at her with gratitude, and Clare feels a bit better. She feels a bit of hope. All she needs is patience and faith.

The doorbell rings and Helen grins with joy, her mood changing completely, "I bet those are some neighbors!"

Clare begins to head upstairs but her mother calls her back down.

"Please, Clarebear. Answer the door and smile." says Helen encouragingly.

Clare can't say no, her guilt convinces her not to. She goes to answer it and she sees that it's the girl from across the street, holding a plate covered in tinfoil. And she's not wearing her sunglasses anymore.

"Hi." says Clare shortly.

"Hi there!" grins the girl, "Well, I know this is so cliche...but, my parents insisted that I would welcome the new neighbors,"

"Um, tha-"

"That's so sweet. Please, come in." interrupts Helen, and reaches her hand out to the girl.

"Alli, of the Bhandari family. We live across the street." replies Alli with a firm handshake.

"I'm Helen, and this is my daughter. Clare."

"Ah, yes. We've met." winks Alli and Clare feels a bit uncomfortable.

"Oh, really? Clare is such a friendly girl, at her old school she had a bunch of friends!" says Helen, squeezing Clare's arm.

Clare stares at her mother in confusion. They both know that is a lie. She feels like opening her mouth to say something, but what can be said? Actually, I have no friends except a guy who I crushed on for three years but didn't feel the same way and ignored me for months.

"Is that so?" says Alli interestingly, smiling at Clare.

"Enough about Clare, please, come inside." offers Helen enthusiastically.

Alli looks undecided and a part of Clare is actually hoping she'll come inside and talk to her. Maybe, she could become her friend. This is all so strange to Clare and she wants to reject the idea.

"Well, I would love to come in, but I'll be late for something else I had planned."

Idea is rejected.

"Oh, it's fine!" says Helen, all smiles, and grabs the plate, "Thanks again for this gesture."

"No problem." replies Alli sweetly, and turns around before leaving, "Clare, right?"

Clare nods and steps up to her.

"This town is boring unless you get out of the house. I can show you around sometime, if you like." whispers Alli.

"Well, I-" Clare pauses and thinks about what her mother told her.

This is a new beginning in a town no one knows about her. She could be herself without anyone judging her. If she wants to do anything, it doesn't matter. The old Clare didn't wear dresses because others thought she wasn't girly. The old Clare wouldn't go out with friends because she was afraid she would run into KC Guthrie and his girlfriend.

She doesn't have to fear anything or anyone, at least for now.

"Tomorrow, most likely." offers Clare, with some hesitation.

"Great!" squeals Alli and jumps in for a hug, and backs away, "I'll be here tomorrow at night."

"Night?"

"It's the only time anyone goes out." laughs Alli and walks away. Down the porch. Into the street. Up her own porch. And then, she's gone.

Clare closes the door, and the first thing her mind goes to is KC and how he is doing.

She misses him.

A/N: Yes, I'm back. Okay, first of all with my other fic CoP. I'm sorry. I gave up on that for 2 reasons:
1. I started to hate it: the idea, plot, direction. I felt that it was too melodramatic for my taste at the time.
2. I started to hate my writing in it. I don't know why, I'm simply my biggest critic.

I'm honestly tired of writing fics that seem on the borderline of fictional. In other words, I felt that my fics were as realistic as a soap-opera. Which I didn't mind before, but now I want to change that. This fic is going to be mostly based on a true story. It's not dramatic or serious. It's a "love" story, that hopefully instead of people saying, "That's so cute!" They could perhaps say, "I can relate to this."

So, of course, it's EClare and AU. I love AU. Degrassi's current reality is too hard for me to deal with.