When she met him, she saw him simply as the Commander of their forces.
He stood proud and tall, a hand resting on the pommel of his sword. There had even been a quirk on the corner of his mouth that formed a lop-sided smile. Their gaze held onto each other for a few moments, but no more than that as she would've found herself drowning into the golden colour of his eyes.
A sweet, sweet colour they were.
Each time she saw him after that, he always had the same posture; one that had conveyed the fact that the person she was observing was a person who knew the meaning of discipline, control and patience. And not only did he look like he had the traits, he actually showed them. The way he trained the recruits, rectifying their misteps or loose lunges, it was like he had been doing so ever since he was brought to the world.
He seemed so focus, but a tap on his shoulder was enough to capture his attention for a quick second.
Then she got to know the Commander and realised that the man was more than his rank.
He was a man who had gone through so much, the light in his golden eyes barely hiding the suffering he went through. The Ferelden circle during the blight, then being reinstated to Kirkwall only to witness the horror that everything led to, it was amazing how he was still standing with such a cool demeanor as if life had been perfect for him.
A perfect life he was far from.
Bit by bit he let her in and so did she, but her life story hadn't been as interesting as his, up until she was found with a green glowy thing in her hand.
Bit by bit she found herself falling for him, adoring the small smiles he saved for her and the strength he held in him.
Sometimes she would simply stare, a skip in the beating of her heart as he stated his opinions about the situations and threats revolving around them, or even just about anything in his life for that matter. He was like a book she couldn't stop reading, a mystery unfolding with each page turned, with each word said and with each fact known.
Even then as she laid beside him in the warmth of her bed did she 'read' with his arms encircled around her waist as the sound of a snore escaped him. His eyebrows were furrowed, lines appearing on his forehead to which became at ease when Ailith began to lightly rub her thumb on top of them. It wasn't often she watched him sleep as both usually immediately fell into the land of the Fade the instant they hit the bed, so it was moments like these that she began to cherish the most. The peacefulness that surrounded them had made her feel like as if there was nothing that threatened to destroy everything she's ever loved, and much to her dismay, the said peacefulness didn't last long as she knew that reality would soon hit her the minute the sun chooses to rise.
"Ailith?" His voice broke through the silence groggily, dispering the crackling sound of the fireplace. There was a blank space in the place of her mind, her eyes steady on his shadowed face as she continued to caress his forehead with such a gentle touch. "What's wrong?" Cullen had asked, eyebrows knitting together once more, but out of worry rather than a trace of a nightmare.
"Take moments of happiness where you find them... the world will take the rest," The words left her breathlessly, a sigh following after. It had been something someone once told her not too long ago, one that made her realise just how selfish the world really was. They'd been fighting demons, bandits, bears, wyverns and basically anything and anyone who bothered to attack her and her merry band of misfits as they traveled through the rocks and the greens and caves.
It's a wonder how she was even still alive after everything she had to put up with.
There was an unreadable expression on the other's face as he returned her gaze, not a single movement made or felt as they merely laid there. His hand had been placed over the curve of her waist, hers had stayed against his skin near where his hairline was. It was a comforting sort, the quiescence between them. Unspoken words were hanging by a thread but they were far from needed to be heard as both of them already knew deep in their hearts what was wanted to be said.
And so after minutes of drowning in the emptiness of her mind, Cullen pulled her to him and rested his forehead against hers, closing his eyes as he did so. She had done the same, letting herself fall into the depths of his warmth rather than letting her fears grasp her back into the coldness. It was only a matter of time before she was to face Corypheus once more and the closer she got, the darker it became.
"You're going to come back," He started, strong arms holding her close, "You need to."
"Cullen, I don't even know if I can do this."
"Of course you can. You've forged impossible alliances, you've inspired so many and so much, you've saved those who thought giving up was the only way and let them become victorious... you're so much more than the woman you think you are."
"Then what am I?"
"Not what, but who," Cullen's voice was so quiet then as he tucked her head beneath his chin, her ear beside the apple of his throat, "You're more than your noble name, more than the lady you were raised to be despite the training with swords and sorts. You started out in chains, and yet now you're leading an entire side of a war. You've given so much, but when was the last time you asked for something in return? You make people fall in love with you just by smiling and listening; kids all around Ferelden and Orlais aspire to be like you when they grow up," A pause, "You understand things that are difficult to understand; you put the lives of others in front of yours even when you're just a human yourself... a simple mortal who has become someone who's worth more than any jewels and gold the world can give me."
"Careful Cullen, your romantic side is poking out again," She tried to keep it cool, the usual façade fitting itself into place to keep the tears from coming out. She hadn't known what to say for no one actually taught her how to respond to situations like the one that had just happened before her. But yes, just when she thought she couldn't love him more, she was obviously proven wrong, even as he chuckled at her response, the vibration of his throat calming in some sort.
"And I love you too."