"Woo…" said Bottles the Mole as he delved into his delectable Danish.
"This was the best idea ever, pal!" said Banjo happily as he munched on a honey-flavoured graham cracker.
Kazooie was grouchy about Bottles's apparent correctness. She took a banana out of her backpack and threw it at the plump little grub-muncher.
"HOLY SNOOTZ!" screamed Banjo as he saw Bottles go down.
Bottles hit the floor and his angel came out. "Oh dear…" he said woefully.
Banjo shot a deadly gaze at his Breegull companion. "You stinky!"
"'Twasn't my fault, my boy…" said Kazooie with her wings crossed. There were eleven explosions behind her to accentuate her almighty presence.
Banjo pulled out his iron Jiggy fists and started beating the chicken to a bloody pulp.
Mumbo was in the corner playing with his Gameboy Color and he saw the whole dang thing.
"I can't be bested…" said Kazooie and she shot a grenade out of her mouth.
Banjo died that day.
"Ooh…" said Bottles tearfully.
Kazooie then ran over to a flight pad and pressed the A-button. Then she went first-person and started pelting all of Spiral Mountain with grenades.
Lord Woo Fak Fak squirmed in via the toilet pipe and started shooting lasers at the airbourne offender.
Kazooie did a flippy thing and shot the ancient angler with a carton of applesauce.
"NO! I know your father!" wailed Lord Woo Fak Fak in horror.
Banjo's angel arose and took Bottles by his spiritual hand. "We must go…" said the peaceful entity.
Mumbo cried tearful tears as he watched Bottles and Banjo ascend into the heavens.
A choir of Waluigis sang beautiful melodies as Kazooie did more angry eyebrows towards her enemies.
This was the first day of a new chaos.
HOT DOODLES! THAT'S THE END!