"You're what?" Grissom stumbled in the door and closed it behind him.
"Pregnant…you know… expecting, with child, knocked up, bun-in-the-oven. There were about twenty euphemisms in my thesaurus." She sat forward and folded her hands. Was she smiling?
"Uh, I know what pregnant means. I just wasn't expecting it in regards to you." He took off his sunglasses. It wasn't a smile, but the crooked smirk she had when she was angry, or sad.
"That makes two of us." She blinked several times.
He stood in the doorway, holding his sunglasses, laptop and brief case. Suddenly his shoulders stung. He swung the bags down to the floor. She stayed in his chair.
Before he could respond, there was a brisk knock on the door. There stood Jim Brass, clutching a slip of paper.
"Welcome back, Gil. DB at the Luxor." He handed Grissom the paper. "Who can I have?"
Grissom shook his head. "Where is everybody?"
Brass gaped at him. "Gee, Gil…I don't know. Oh look, there's Sara, right there at your desk!"
"I need her here! Go get Brown or Stokes." Grissom realized he was too emphatic. "I mean…yeah, take Nick."
Brass snatched back the paper. "Yes, sir"
Sara stood up. "I'll go, Jim."
Gil's eyes widened as he watched her come around his desk toward him. "No, Sara, I need you to stay here." He reached out to grab her elbow.
She avoided him deftly. "We can discuss this later." She pushed past him and out the door with Brass. In seconds she was gone. Grissom leaned back against the door frame, letting out a long sigh. He checked his watch. He had been back for ten minutes and forty eight seconds. He picked up his bags and went to the desk and chair. It smelled like her.
He began to unpack his briefcase, filling his nostrils with her scent. No matter where, she had this incredible smell. Especially in her bedroom. But it wasn't perfume. A pheromone. Suddenly he wished he was one of those praying mantises that got eaten by their mates after fertilization.
He sat heavily as the room spun. Sara pregnant? All the sensations of the night before he left came flooding back. He had tried so hard to put them out of his mind and concentrate on teaching. Would he have done the same thing if he could go back in time? Probably. For a little while he was gloriously out of his cocoon. Alive.
He sat down and began to sort through the papers on his desk: expense reports, scheduling requests, a transfer request? From Sara Sidle? His stomach flipped over. This was all too much.
Catherine appeared in his doorway. "Welcome back, stranger."
"Oh, Hi Catherine." He took a second look and noticed she was especially gorgeous today, leaning against the door frame.
"I can see you're glad to be back." She raised one eyebrow.
"You have no idea."
Her cell phone went off and she opened it. "Lindsay? Where are you…" She waved to Grissom and left down the hall, speaking sharply.
"Oh the joys of parenting," he said out loud. He shuddered to think of himself as a father. He pictured the embryo in Sara's belly. She's probably about four weeks. Just beginning to form a neural tube. He looked up and saw his fetal pig in the jar. It glowed in the sunlight streaming through the window. Why didn't she tell him before? When did she find out?
There was a pile of messages. One from Lady Heather dated two weeks ago. He stuffed that in his pocket, feeling strangely guilty. Did she even want to have a baby? It was early enough for an abortion. That might be the best solution for both of them. Why should they pay for one stupid mistake the rest of their lives? Surely she saw it as a mistake as much as him.
After an eternity, she appeared in his doorway, looking pale and tired. "Hey."
He put on his glasses. "Hey."
"The…uh…DB was a…suh…suicide. Guy lost it all in the casino and blew his brains out." She looked over his head, folding her arms.
"I see. Did the family get notified?"
"Yeah. They're on the way from New Mexico." She stayed in the doorway. She looked around the office and her gaze rested on the fetal pig. He cleared his throat.
"Do you want to come in?"
"Uh, sure." She pushed her hair behind her right ear as she stepped toward the desk. She sat awkwardly in the only other chair in the room. She leaned forward on her knees and hung her head.
"Nausea?"
"Yeah, a little. Comes and goes. I'm mostly just tired."
"When did you find out?"
"Just a few days ago, for sure. Sometimes my period is late…stress and all."
She sat up and he sat back in the chair. All he could think of was her naked belly and how soft it was, glowing in the citrine light of her room. He lay beside her, memorizing every inch, for certainly this would never happen again. She had put her hand over his, moving it to her breast for a second before kissing the rough palm. At that moment he knew he had always loved her. Whatever that meant…She stood up.
"Sara, are you leaving?"
"You mean right now?"
"Yes, right now."
"No. I guess not." She sat on the edge of the desk.
"Do you want to have it?" He twirled his glasses by one handle and leaned away from her.
"I never thought about…being a mother. It just never occurred to me."
"I understand if you don't want to." He caught her glancing at the fetal pig.
"Do you want me to?"
"It's not up to me."
"It's yours, too." She wiped her forehead with the back of her hand.
He nodded. "But I'm not the one who has to carry it."
She was silent. Her profile was so strong, so noble. Like Nefertiti. He wanted to gather her up in his arms like a little girl. Little girl…what if he had his own little girl? He chased the picture of a blonde waif from his mind.
"I…uh…have an appointment tomorrow," she said trying to sound casual.
Did she want him to come? Was it for a prenatal checkup? Abortion? He didn't know how to respond.
"Do you need some time off?"
Her shoulders sank. "How very boss-like of you, Grissom. Yeah. That's just what I came in here for. By the way did you see my transfer request?"
His eyes widened. "Yes, I did."
She gave him the you-need-to-say-more look.
"I was…hoping we could discuss it."
Her eyes lit up. "Really?"
Just then, the door flew open, with Jim Brass behind it. "Apartment house fire, multiple bodies. We need everybody."
Grissom and Sara rose in sync and bounded for the door. They grabbed their kits and joined the moving throng in the hall.
"Sara! Come with me!" Grissom shouted, not caring what anybody thought. She ran over and jumped in the passenger door of the Denali. He started the engine and threw it into drive. They put on their sunglasses, both feeling the adrenaline rush of a new case. They both smiled widely.
"What time is your appointment tomorrow? He looked straight ahead.
So did she. "Don't worry, boss. It's off the clock."
He reached down and took her hand. "I was hoping it was."