Author's Notes:
Kokkan: Alright, here's the first Zelda fanfiction. Basically it's about a
group of friends who get sucked into Ocarina of Time, and become either a)
Zelda characters or b) new characters. Along the way us muses will pop in.
To reduce the confusion, there's myself, Domino, UnicornGirl, Sweetpea,
Icy, DeathAngel, Kim, Freakees, and Rabid Chipmunk. *Gasps for air*
Anyway, read on.
Disclaimer: Do you think I own Zelda? If you do, your mind is very under developed. Here, have a Twinkie.
Warnings: High levels of insanity, corny humor, tons of self-insertion, bashing of the Kokiri (Nothing against the Kokiri, EVERYBODY gets bashed in this fic)...etc...
One more thing. [ ] means author's note at the bottom. ^_^
Legend of Zelda: Game Reality Chapter 1
In a bright, cheerful living room, three teenagers and one preteen sit on the floor in front of the TV.
The oldest teenager is a girl with reddish-brown hair pulled into a ponytail, and aqua contacts in her eyes. She is wearing a black and gray shirt with monkeys on it, and black pleather pants. Her name is Cherri. [1]
The second oldest of the group is a boy with light blond hair and silvery blue eyes. He is wearing a black shirt that has 'Watch Out, I'm a Martian' written on it, and cargo jeans. His name is John, though everyone refers to him as John-John.
The third teen is Kristin, whose (one of many) muse is Kokkan, the author of this fanfiction. She has brown hair, and eyes that switch from grayish- blue to hazel and wears glasses. She is wearing an light green tank top and black jeans.
The preteen is John-John's sister, named Danielle. She has light blond hair and hazel eyes. She also has glasses. She is wearing a white tank top and jean shorts.
Even though, like I said before, the living room is bright and cheerful, the mood of Kristin is not. Why? Just listen in...
Kristin: I haaate this Water Temple! Die! Die! DIIIIIEEEEE!!!
John-John: This is the third time you've told the game to die, die, die. It's getting old. Just let me get you through the temple, and you can battle Dark Link and Morpha. [2]
Kristin: NOOO!!! I shall conquer this temple...Mweheehee...
Cherri: You are seriously scaring me.
Danielle: Try seeing her when she has too much sugar, THEN she's really scary.
Kristin: WHAT?! I AM STUCK! HOW RUDE! *Throws the controller against the TV screen, shattering it* KYAAA!!! What have I done?! I am so dead! *Wails*
Danielle: Uh...Kristin, your N64 is smoking...
Cherri: You're TV is flickering black and white, too...
John-John: Cool.
Kristin: COOL?! If this is so cool, you can pay for it, mista!
John-John: Ooh, I'm scared now.
Kristin: STOP BEING SARCASTIC!
Danielle: Uh, Kristin, you're TV's about to-
*The TV explodes, sending a bright white light everywhere. When if fades, we're all gone. Stop your cheering.*
John-John: Ugh...Cookies? Back up the truck... *Wakes up and looks around* Hey, this looks like Link's treehouse...Couldn't be...Hm? *Looks at the doorway* [3]
Fairy: Hey! Look! Listen! Watch out! I'm gonna run into your-*Bashes into John-John's face*
John-John: *Pulls the fairy off his face* Get off me, you stupid bug...Wait...don't say it's-
Fairy: Hey! Look! Listen! I'm Navi the Fairy!
John-John: -Navi. Blast it.
Navi: I'm gonna be your fairy partner from now on! Nice ta metcha! Wanna know how to roll forward?!
John-John: NO.
Navi: Hmph! Grump! Anywhoo, come on, Link! The Great Deku Tree wants to see you! But I can't see how Hyrule's destiny really depends on such a lazy boy! And such a young boy! Ten years old! WIMP!
John-John: Number one, bug, I'm not Link. Number two, I'm not ten. I'm fourteen.
Navi: Uh, yes you're Link! And yes you're ten! Duh! *Rolls eyes*
John-John: No I'm not.
Navi: YES YOU ARE!
John-John: NO I'm NOT.
Navi: Check da mirror, bucko!
John-John: I'm not bucko. *Grabs Navi and throws her out of the house and walks over to mirror/sink type thingie* Huh? GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-*Takes a breath* -AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!
Navi: *Flies back in* Hey! Look! Listen! How rude of ya ta throw me out da window! What's wrong?!
John-John: I'm a kid?! And in a SKIRT?! O_O; And I'm TEN! *Punches mirror*
Navi: *Dodges flying glass* Seven years bad luck! Kakakakaka!
John-John: *Blinks* Kakakakaka?
Navi: Uh...insteada hahahahaha! Ya know, get it?! Antywayz, of course you're a kid, and it's a tunic, not a skirt! Duh! *Smacks John-John over the head*
John-John: At least I still look like me...Stupid hat...*Takes off Link's weird lookin' hat and throws it out of the window*
Navi: Well, hey! Look! Listen! Let's get going before I start ranting out how to open a door!
John-John: Whatever, bug. Come on. *Walks out of tree house*
Navi: Hey! I'm notta bug! *Follows Link*
John-John: *Walks out of treehouse and looks around* ...Hm? *Looks down*
Girl: YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! HI LINK!
John-John: *Blinks* She sounds like she's riding a horse or somethin'.
Navi: Well, welcome to the hyper world of Kokiri! Everybody's overly cheerful, hyper, or grumpy, or insane! It's always been that way! Duh!
John-John: *Climbs down ladder* Faith...? [4]
Girl: I'm Saria, silly! Heehee! Oh, look a fairy! Wow, you got a fairy!
John-John: Faith?!
Saria: Oh, what a pretty name for a fairy! Hi Faith!
John-John: No, she's Navi, you're Faith!
Saria: I am? But...I thought I was Saria! Oh well, you must be tired so you're not thinking straight! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
John-John: *Blinks* What's so funny?
Saria: Um...I dunno...Hee hee hee!
John-John: Whatever, Faith.
Saria: I'm SARIA!
John-John: You're Faith! I mean, in Ocarina of Time, you've got green hair! Now you've got blonde!
Saria: I've always had blonde hair, Link...Oh, wow! The Great Deku Tree actually summoned you? WHAT an HONOR! *Giggles*
John-John: How'd you know that? [5]
Saria: *Stops giggling and frowns* Um...how did I know? Strange...*Falls over laughing*
John-John: O_O
Navi: Dun worry, Link! She's just overdosed on berry sugar! She'll act normal in a little bit!
John-John: Good...V_V
Navi: Well, COME ON! The Great Deku Tree is awaitin'!
John-John: We'd better get a sword and shield first, Mido'll be blocking the way.
Navi: NO he WON'T! COME ON!
(At the entrance to the Meadow)
Mido: Hey, Mr. NO FAIRY! GET OOOOOOOUUUUUUUTTTTTTTTTTT!!!
John-John: *Looks at Mido* Nick?! Aw man! __ [7]
Navi: Ack...leggo...you're...squeezing...me...GACKIE! *Dies from lack of air*
John-John: Hm? I killed her? Oh well, that's for being annoying. *Tosses Navi into river*
Mido: MR. NO FAIRY!
John-John: WHAT?! *Growls*
Mido: To pass, you've gotta get a sword and shield!!!
John-John: Oh...right...Grins evilly* Then I'll have a little fun with my sword...*Runs off*
(Inside the Hole of Z)
John-John: Heh...can't wait till I get this sword...*Opens treasure chest. Out pops the Kokiri Sword...and Navi* AH! It's alive! O_O
Navi: Of course I'm alive, you dummyhead! I'm immooooooortal! *Thunder rumbles*
John-John: Nooo...why me?! Wait...is Ashley in the real world immortal?! O_O [8]
Navi: Oh, be quiet!
John-John: Do you always talk in exclamations?
Navi: Yes! I do! Now, COME ON!
*At the Super Kokirimart* [9]
Weird Hopping Shop Owner: HHHHHEEEEELLLLOOOOO THERE! HOW MAY I HELP YOU?
John-John: *Sweatdrops*
*Suddenly everyone freezes and Domino pops up* That's it! For now! On the next exciting and boring episode of Game Reality, will the Weird Hopping Shop Owner murder John-John? Why would he? I don't know! Stay tuned, you mere mortals. MWAHAHAHAHAHA! *Lightning crashes*
Author's Notes:
[1] Cherri used to have pleather pants...For those that don't know, pleather is plastic that looks like leather or something like that...Heh, pleather. Sounds funny. *Sticks out tongue*
[2] The Water Temple. My least favorite temple (It's so HARD!) but home to my favorite boss and mini-boss. Go figure.
[3] Y'know that cookies back up the truck line? John-John really said it when he woke up once. ^_^ *Pokes at John-John*
[4] Faith is John-John's older sister. She's REALLY nice, and acts nothing like this. Um...blame the berry sugars. She has an obsession with Elijah Wood, and I love Orlando Bloom (Frodo and Legolas from LotR) so we like debating over who's cuter. Come on, guys, vote for Legolas! ^^;;;
[5] Seriously, HOW does she know in the game?! Psychic Saria?!
[6] Nick is an annoying kid John-John knows, and that John-John wouldn't mind disposing of. Heh heh heh. ^_^
[7] I cannot STAND Ashley. She's a girl John-John and I used to know. A snob, a flirt, a know-it-all...My worst enemy. :P
[8] If Ashley is indeed immortal, I'll shoot myself.
[9] Super Kokirimart = Super Walmart? DID ANYONE GET IT?! O_O
Disclaimer: Do you think I own Zelda? If you do, your mind is very under developed. Here, have a Twinkie.
Warnings: High levels of insanity, corny humor, tons of self-insertion, bashing of the Kokiri (Nothing against the Kokiri, EVERYBODY gets bashed in this fic)...etc...
One more thing. [ ] means author's note at the bottom. ^_^
Legend of Zelda: Game Reality Chapter 1
In a bright, cheerful living room, three teenagers and one preteen sit on the floor in front of the TV.
The oldest teenager is a girl with reddish-brown hair pulled into a ponytail, and aqua contacts in her eyes. She is wearing a black and gray shirt with monkeys on it, and black pleather pants. Her name is Cherri. [1]
The second oldest of the group is a boy with light blond hair and silvery blue eyes. He is wearing a black shirt that has 'Watch Out, I'm a Martian' written on it, and cargo jeans. His name is John, though everyone refers to him as John-John.
The third teen is Kristin, whose (one of many) muse is Kokkan, the author of this fanfiction. She has brown hair, and eyes that switch from grayish- blue to hazel and wears glasses. She is wearing an light green tank top and black jeans.
The preteen is John-John's sister, named Danielle. She has light blond hair and hazel eyes. She also has glasses. She is wearing a white tank top and jean shorts.
Even though, like I said before, the living room is bright and cheerful, the mood of Kristin is not. Why? Just listen in...
Kristin: I haaate this Water Temple! Die! Die! DIIIIIEEEEE!!!
John-John: This is the third time you've told the game to die, die, die. It's getting old. Just let me get you through the temple, and you can battle Dark Link and Morpha. [2]
Kristin: NOOO!!! I shall conquer this temple...Mweheehee...
Cherri: You are seriously scaring me.
Danielle: Try seeing her when she has too much sugar, THEN she's really scary.
Kristin: WHAT?! I AM STUCK! HOW RUDE! *Throws the controller against the TV screen, shattering it* KYAAA!!! What have I done?! I am so dead! *Wails*
Danielle: Uh...Kristin, your N64 is smoking...
Cherri: You're TV is flickering black and white, too...
John-John: Cool.
Kristin: COOL?! If this is so cool, you can pay for it, mista!
John-John: Ooh, I'm scared now.
Kristin: STOP BEING SARCASTIC!
Danielle: Uh, Kristin, you're TV's about to-
*The TV explodes, sending a bright white light everywhere. When if fades, we're all gone. Stop your cheering.*
John-John: Ugh...Cookies? Back up the truck... *Wakes up and looks around* Hey, this looks like Link's treehouse...Couldn't be...Hm? *Looks at the doorway* [3]
Fairy: Hey! Look! Listen! Watch out! I'm gonna run into your-*Bashes into John-John's face*
John-John: *Pulls the fairy off his face* Get off me, you stupid bug...Wait...don't say it's-
Fairy: Hey! Look! Listen! I'm Navi the Fairy!
John-John: -Navi. Blast it.
Navi: I'm gonna be your fairy partner from now on! Nice ta metcha! Wanna know how to roll forward?!
John-John: NO.
Navi: Hmph! Grump! Anywhoo, come on, Link! The Great Deku Tree wants to see you! But I can't see how Hyrule's destiny really depends on such a lazy boy! And such a young boy! Ten years old! WIMP!
John-John: Number one, bug, I'm not Link. Number two, I'm not ten. I'm fourteen.
Navi: Uh, yes you're Link! And yes you're ten! Duh! *Rolls eyes*
John-John: No I'm not.
Navi: YES YOU ARE!
John-John: NO I'm NOT.
Navi: Check da mirror, bucko!
John-John: I'm not bucko. *Grabs Navi and throws her out of the house and walks over to mirror/sink type thingie* Huh? GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-*Takes a breath* -AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!
Navi: *Flies back in* Hey! Look! Listen! How rude of ya ta throw me out da window! What's wrong?!
John-John: I'm a kid?! And in a SKIRT?! O_O; And I'm TEN! *Punches mirror*
Navi: *Dodges flying glass* Seven years bad luck! Kakakakaka!
John-John: *Blinks* Kakakakaka?
Navi: Uh...insteada hahahahaha! Ya know, get it?! Antywayz, of course you're a kid, and it's a tunic, not a skirt! Duh! *Smacks John-John over the head*
John-John: At least I still look like me...Stupid hat...*Takes off Link's weird lookin' hat and throws it out of the window*
Navi: Well, hey! Look! Listen! Let's get going before I start ranting out how to open a door!
John-John: Whatever, bug. Come on. *Walks out of tree house*
Navi: Hey! I'm notta bug! *Follows Link*
John-John: *Walks out of treehouse and looks around* ...Hm? *Looks down*
Girl: YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! HI LINK!
John-John: *Blinks* She sounds like she's riding a horse or somethin'.
Navi: Well, welcome to the hyper world of Kokiri! Everybody's overly cheerful, hyper, or grumpy, or insane! It's always been that way! Duh!
John-John: *Climbs down ladder* Faith...? [4]
Girl: I'm Saria, silly! Heehee! Oh, look a fairy! Wow, you got a fairy!
John-John: Faith?!
Saria: Oh, what a pretty name for a fairy! Hi Faith!
John-John: No, she's Navi, you're Faith!
Saria: I am? But...I thought I was Saria! Oh well, you must be tired so you're not thinking straight! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
John-John: *Blinks* What's so funny?
Saria: Um...I dunno...Hee hee hee!
John-John: Whatever, Faith.
Saria: I'm SARIA!
John-John: You're Faith! I mean, in Ocarina of Time, you've got green hair! Now you've got blonde!
Saria: I've always had blonde hair, Link...Oh, wow! The Great Deku Tree actually summoned you? WHAT an HONOR! *Giggles*
John-John: How'd you know that? [5]
Saria: *Stops giggling and frowns* Um...how did I know? Strange...*Falls over laughing*
John-John: O_O
Navi: Dun worry, Link! She's just overdosed on berry sugar! She'll act normal in a little bit!
John-John: Good...V_V
Navi: Well, COME ON! The Great Deku Tree is awaitin'!
John-John: We'd better get a sword and shield first, Mido'll be blocking the way.
Navi: NO he WON'T! COME ON!
(At the entrance to the Meadow)
Mido: Hey, Mr. NO FAIRY! GET OOOOOOOUUUUUUUTTTTTTTTTTT!!!
John-John: *Looks at Mido* Nick?! Aw man! __ [7]
Navi: Ack...leggo...you're...squeezing...me...GACKIE! *Dies from lack of air*
John-John: Hm? I killed her? Oh well, that's for being annoying. *Tosses Navi into river*
Mido: MR. NO FAIRY!
John-John: WHAT?! *Growls*
Mido: To pass, you've gotta get a sword and shield!!!
John-John: Oh...right...Grins evilly* Then I'll have a little fun with my sword...*Runs off*
(Inside the Hole of Z)
John-John: Heh...can't wait till I get this sword...*Opens treasure chest. Out pops the Kokiri Sword...and Navi* AH! It's alive! O_O
Navi: Of course I'm alive, you dummyhead! I'm immooooooortal! *Thunder rumbles*
John-John: Nooo...why me?! Wait...is Ashley in the real world immortal?! O_O [8]
Navi: Oh, be quiet!
John-John: Do you always talk in exclamations?
Navi: Yes! I do! Now, COME ON!
*At the Super Kokirimart* [9]
Weird Hopping Shop Owner: HHHHHEEEEELLLLOOOOO THERE! HOW MAY I HELP YOU?
John-John: *Sweatdrops*
*Suddenly everyone freezes and Domino pops up* That's it! For now! On the next exciting and boring episode of Game Reality, will the Weird Hopping Shop Owner murder John-John? Why would he? I don't know! Stay tuned, you mere mortals. MWAHAHAHAHAHA! *Lightning crashes*
Author's Notes:
[1] Cherri used to have pleather pants...For those that don't know, pleather is plastic that looks like leather or something like that...Heh, pleather. Sounds funny. *Sticks out tongue*
[2] The Water Temple. My least favorite temple (It's so HARD!) but home to my favorite boss and mini-boss. Go figure.
[3] Y'know that cookies back up the truck line? John-John really said it when he woke up once. ^_^ *Pokes at John-John*
[4] Faith is John-John's older sister. She's REALLY nice, and acts nothing like this. Um...blame the berry sugars. She has an obsession with Elijah Wood, and I love Orlando Bloom (Frodo and Legolas from LotR) so we like debating over who's cuter. Come on, guys, vote for Legolas! ^^;;;
[5] Seriously, HOW does she know in the game?! Psychic Saria?!
[6] Nick is an annoying kid John-John knows, and that John-John wouldn't mind disposing of. Heh heh heh. ^_^
[7] I cannot STAND Ashley. She's a girl John-John and I used to know. A snob, a flirt, a know-it-all...My worst enemy. :P
[8] If Ashley is indeed immortal, I'll shoot myself.
[9] Super Kokirimart = Super Walmart? DID ANYONE GET IT?! O_O