Stay… For Me
Pairing: Aaron Hotchner & Emily Prentiss (Are you really surprised by that?)
Spoilers: A/U Season 6, Spoiler up to and including "Out of The Light & Big Sea"
Rating: T
Summary: Emily finally returns to find that the world kept turning without her, now she has to decide whether to return to her old life or take the fresh start she's been given.
Author's Note: I had been planning on having this up by Friday morning but just as I got to the end it started to give me some problems. So in the end it took me a little longer to post than I wanted but I hope the extra work was worth it in the end. This idea got stuck in my head after watching "Out Of The Light" and finally materialized after watching "Big Sea" and I found that I couldn't work on any of the other projects I have on the go until I worked this one out. So here is another one shot… And yes, it's only a one shot…
Given the Choice – Stay… For Me
Emily leaned against the tree next to her, reveling in the way that the rough bark felt under her arm and the warmth of the late spring sun on her skin. This was the first time she had been allowed out in open air, without an 'escort', in close to a week.
She prayed that she never, ever had to go through another debriefing with the State Department or the CIA ever again. But as she looked across the field, she sighed from deep in her chest; it had been worth it, just to be standing here now. The tension in her body that was always present seemed to abate with the vision in front of her.
Standing roughly a hundred and fifty feet away, she could easily pick him out from all of the people standing on the sidelines of the soccer field. He had such a presence about him that at times she was certain that she could pick him out of a room full of men with her eyes closed. He could be leading and taking charge or fading into the background and she was always conscious of where he was.
Leaning there, under the intermittent shade of an old yellow birch tree she could clearly see him for the first time in months. And what a sight he made as he jumped up and down cheering. He was clad in sneakers, a soft grey t-shirt and well-loved blue jeans, simple, casual. She felt her breath catch in her chest at the sight.
She listened to the cheering and smiled softly to herself. How she wished she was out there with Hotch and Dave, enjoying the sun and the game, cheering for Jack. How she missed all of them, so very much. But it was Hotch that drew her here to this field in her first day of freedom after her debriefing.
Emily tipped her head to the side and rested it against the sun warmed bark, watching with eager eyes as Hotch ran along the length of the field, following along with the pack of screaming racing children. This was a new side of him and in that moment she decided she could spend hours just enjoying his excitement.
For almost five years she had been glued to his side. Twelve to sixteen hours a day, five to six days a week. Now she had spent the last few months out of his constant presence. Each day felt like a wound in her soul and at first she didn't really understand why. He was just Hotch. She thought of them all, every single day, but her thoughts of him always brought with it that unique kind of longing.
They weren't particularly close, not like she was with the others on the team but there was something special about Aaron Hotchner. He stood on the side most often, leading them with a gentle strength that was neither dominant nor overpowering and as a result the world they lived in seemed to center around him and it was completely without his knowledge or desire.
The team had built a family together and he was their head, intentional or not. And at first she thought it was missing that sense of family she had found with them, and it was. But at the same time when she thought about Hotch there was something more. It wasn't until she was gone and roaming around alone that she was able to identify the feeling for what it was.
She was in love.
It had come to her so very gradually that she never even noticed the shift in her feelings. Desire in his presence was nothing new, she'd always felt that. She was a warm blooded female and was smart enough to know when she was in the presence of an attractive, powerful man. On occasion Morgan and Dave had engendered the same reaction in her so she thought nothing of it.
Emily would be the first to admit that at 40 years old it never would have occurred to her that she would find her first love, she had kind of assumed that she was never going to find it. She'd never felt the first blush of love when she was young and it was part of the reason it took her so long to realize what she was feeling for Aaron Hotchner. She never expected to find love this late in the game or that it would turn out to be a man that she worked with… worked for.
Or that it would be someone that she would never be able to have.
At least that was what she had thought, until Ian Doyle had ended up dead and she hadn't.
It was an outcome that she hadn't expected. She had been fully prepared when she left JJ in Paris that she would not survive the next encounter with Ian. But in either situation, be it with her final death or his, her family would remain safe, and in the end that was all that really matter to her. Ian had been wrong about that, her life meant little to her when faced with the threat to her family. She would gladly sacrifice her own life to keep them safe, she would kill in cold blood to protect them and in the end she did both.
She watched as the game came to a close and all of the parents started to pack up their children and move away. Dave clapped Hotch on the back one final time before he headed off to his SUV. For a moment she had been jealous of the fact that he was allowed to be there and she was not. It was something she and Dave would have both done not long ago; she would have come to the games with them and cheered for Jack as he raced across the field. She would have been the one to stand on the sidelines with Hotch, even if only as his friend.
Finally, when there were only a handful of people left Emily took a step forward and prepared to march her way across the field but her plan was arrested mid-step as she saw a young brunette woman and her child walk up to Hotch and start talking.
Her heart sank in her chest as she watched him talking. Hotch was smiling brightly as he ruffled Jack's hair, his movements animated as he gesticulated wildly, still wound up from the excitement of the game. Clearly he seemed to be enjoying the conversation with the young woman and if her body language was any indication she was more than enjoying her time with him.
The young woman reached out a hand to lay on his forearm and rather than pulling away as he normally would have, he stayed in place, allowing, even welcoming her touch as he shifted closer to her, listening intently to what she was saying. To anyone else it would have seemed nothing more than a friendly gesture but his reaction seemed more than that… at least to someone who knew him as well as Emily did.
Had things changed so much in the short time she had been gone? She didn't expect them to be stagnant in the time she was away. The team, her family would mourn her passing and move on, it was the way of the world but he knew she was still out there.
Was it her own wishful thinking, her fanciful daydreams that had convinced her that his affection for her was more than that of a teammate? She felt the same as she did the day she boarded the plane to Paris and had assumed that he wouldn't have changed either. She had believed that the simple touches he bestowed upon her and no one else, the soft smiles when they talked, where an indication of something more. Was she wrong in her assumptions?
Emily turned away from the sight, unable to watch any longer as he packed up the last of his belongings and the four of them headed off to their vehicles. His hand resting on the other woman's back and his head tipped down as she spoke to him.
He had looked so happy, yelling from the sidelines and cheering for his son, chatting with another, likely, single parent. Did she have the right to come back into their lives now? They were starting to move on and the pain of her passing was growing dimmer each day. Did she have the right to come back now and upset the apple cart or was her time with them past?
If she came back now it would only cause JJ and Hotch pain when they were forced to admit to the secret that they were keeping from the others. As it was now, after some time has passed, the team would think back on her with only happy memories and perhaps that was the way it should be.
She heard the car door shut behind her but couldn't make herself look up at her friend. She knew the look she was going to get for having chickened out. For having stayed where she was and not having taken that first step back into her life. She heard the deep sigh and almost smiled. JJ could be so predictable sometimes.
"I've been gone too long." Emily turned her head to look at JJ standing just over her shoulder before dropping her head in defeat.
"Emily, you could be gone a hundred years and it wouldn't be too long." There was sympathy and understanding in the blonde's voice but it wasn't enough to make Emily take that last step forward.
The last step that would take her into the light and let Hotch see her, alive and whole.
"They're healing, all of them. Do I have the right to intrude on that?" There was a melancholy in her voice that broke JJ's heart.
"Yes, this is your family, it's where you belong."
"It was, but maybe this is the last thing I can do for my family. Have you thought about the consequences you and Hotch are going to face if I come back?"
"We knew the moment we decided to fake your death what we were getting into. We did it to keep you safe, to keep us all safe. The team is going to understand that. It might take some time but they will." She raised and elegant brow in question, since she knew what was really stalling her friend. "And besides, I thought you were going to finally tell him the truth."
Emily closed her eyes and leaned her head back on the tree, willing her aching heart to still. "I can't JJ; this is the life he should have. Not one tied up with me and the demons in my past."
JJ moved forward so that she was standing directly in front of her friend. Her voice when it came was sure and strong. "Once a week, every week, without fail; I didn't matter what they were doing or where they were, he would call. He would call just to ask about you and if I heard anything new."
"He would have done the same if it had been Morgan or Reid. He's nothing if not focused when it comes to the team." Her voice was defeated and sad when she spoke and JJ knew that saying anything further was a lost cause.
The blond pursed her lips as she considered her friend. She knew that look, that there was no way that she was going to convince her stubborn friend of anything now. All she could do is make one last appeal and hope that Hotch had better luck that she did.
"Promise me, even if you take the deal and choose not to come back that you'll at least say good bye to Hotch. He knows you're still alive. Give him that closure."
Emily looked over at her friend but didn't acknowledge the request because in asking they both knew that she would do it. In the end she still wasn't sure what she was going to do. She watched Hotch standing next to his car with Jack and laughing with the other woman and felt her heart sink a little further.
"Can we check on the others? Then I promise I'll go and see Hotch, regardless of my decision."
"Yeah, we can do that."
Emily laced her fingers through JJ's and together they moved towards the car, both knowing that regardless of what she said, her decision was already made.
One Week Later
Hotch climbed wearily out of his car and pushed the door shut before allowing his body to collapse back into the cool metal. This last case was grueling, with long hours and extremely hot days but it was made so much worse for having to watch Derek struggle unaided through his own issues.
There was no doubt in his mind that when he finally decided to step down Derek would make an excellent replacement. But in this instance he could see that in all of the time he spent training him, teaching him the ropes of the command side of the BAU, there was something he forgot to teach him. It was an easy oversight because it was something Aaron himself had only been learning how to do in the last couple of years.
That was how to lean on someone else.
And honestly, he wasn't really that good at it either.
Aaron reached down a picked a stray black thread off of his tan colored pants and smirked. That would have driven her obsessive compulsive mind absolutely mad. He was half tempted to put the thread back just because it made him think of her. The superstitious notion crossed his mind that if he left it there she would have to come back, just to obsess over it before finally getting impatient and demanding that he pick it off.
He wished for the thousandth time that Emily had been here this last week. It was the same thought that entered his mind each day, several times a day but her absence was ever present this time and it wasn't for entirely personal reasons either.
She would have made Morgan lean on her, whether he wanted to or not. She had absolutely no problem butting her nose into Derek's business and offering up her opinions, even when he didn't want to hear it, and for some reason he always accepted it from her. Derek wouldn't ask for council, even when he needed it, but Emily had a way of getting him to open up when no one else could. They had all tried at one point or another over the last week but he resisted. There was no one that could make Derek Morgan do anything he didn't want to, except for Prentiss and Garcia and neither of them were there this time.
As he looked up at the dark sky Aaron decided that there was no reason to rush into the apartment and allowed the cool Virginia night air to take away the last of the lingering Florida heat from his skin. Jack was still with his Aunt and would be until tomorrow evening. There was no one else at home waiting for him.
There never was anymore.
And the one he wanted to be there was hundreds of miles away and she might not ever come back. He had waited too long to talk to her, to tell her what he was feeling.
That had been a hard reality to face.
Months of sitting back, waiting and praying were starting to takes its toll on him and it didn't seem as if the end was in sight.
He had been trying to get a hold of JJ for the last few days to see if there was an update on Prentiss' movements but JJ was nowhere to be found, which seemed to be the case over the last week or so. Often times it was those short phone calls that helped him to cope, to know that he wasn't alone in the secret that he kept.
More often than not there was never anything new about Prentiss but it helped, just having that small, tangible reminder that she really was alive and out in the world. That she wasn't truly gone, that one day she might come home. JJ had someone tracking the alias' that were assigned to Prentiss when she left. He wasn't allowed to know that detail but JJ was keeping tabs on when she boarded a train, or used one of the bank accounts and could at least tell him what country she was in. Just the constant state of movement was enough to reassure him that she was still alive and that she would come home one day and he would finally have the chance to find the nerve to have a long talk with her, one that they should have had a year ago.
Aaron levered his body off of the side of the car and stretched out his muscles. With weary steps he turned towards his building, back hunched forward and looking for all intents and purposes like the weight of the world rested on his shoulders. And at times it felt like it did.
The soft noise of a throat clearing just off to his left caused his head to jerk up violently. He had been so absorbed in his thoughts that he hadn't even realized that there was anyone else in the area.
He cursed his lack of attention, especially given his past; it wasn't a mistake that he made very often. His mind always focused on what was around him and the dangers that could come from any dark corner. The past had clearly taught him that.
He took in the sight of a slight figure just off to the side of the doorway and as she stepped father into the light, he had to bite back a gasp of shock.
It had to be his imagination.
Standing there, in the clear light of the overhang was a vision he feared he would never see again.
Wrapped in a long dark grey overcoat, hands tucked in her pockets, was Emily Prentiss, alive and breathing, just feet away from him.
She looked tired and drawn, the look on her face spoke of deep sadness and he had to wonder at its cause.
She was finally home; there should be no sadness to be found here.
Her dark raven colored hair was shorter and lighter than it had been the last time he was allowed to lay eyes on her, just after her surgery.
She had still been in chemically induced sleep but JJ had managed to free him up enough time to sneak back and see her before she was moved to Bethesda Naval Hospital, and disappeared from their lives. He had needed to see with his own two eyes that she wasn't really dead. It didn't matter if logically he knew she wasn't; call it his inner control freak but he couldn't let her leave without seeing, for himself, that she was still alive, still breathing.
When he first walked into the room he had been so sure that they had lied to him. She was so pale, her skin the color of the sheets she was laying on and translucent enough to see the faint veins in her forehead.
He stopped cold in the doorway, afraid to move closer, and listened to the reassuring beep, beep, beep that signaled her heart was still strong and that blood still flowed through her body. The nurse that had been sitting with her quietly stepped out of the room and allowed him a few moments with his agent… his friend.
He moved closer to her, stepping up to the side of her bed and his hand trembled in midair, afraid to touch her, afraid to say good bye, for the desperate fear that it was for the last time. With careful deliberation he softly brushed her bangs back from her forehead and marveled at the warmth of her skin, in such a cold and sterile room.
For long moments he stayed with her, willing for it all to be a nightmare. That she wasn't going to have to leave them and he wouldn't have to hurt to everyone that he knew to keep her safe. Praying once again that she would forgive them for the decisions they made on her behalf while she was asleep and fighting for her life.
He leaned down and pressed his lips to her forehead before backing away slowly and edging out of the room, a weight in his chest screaming that it was the last time that he was ever going to see her.
As Emily stepped closer to him the spell around his thoughts was broken. His movements towards her were hesitant and unsure; as if he moved to fast she would fade like a desert mirage and be gone again.
When he was standing less than a foot from her he allowed his voice air. "Emily…" His voice trailed off with the breeze not knowing how to fill the silence around them. What more could he say? There was too much that needed to be said.
"Hello Hotch." Her voice was soft and light, just as he remembered it, but there was something more now, that same sadness that he didn't know the cause of.
His brow furrowed as he thought back over the last week, to the messages that were never returned. "This is why JJ has been ducking my phone calls?"
"Yes. I was with State; she wasn't allowed to tell you about my return until my debriefing with them and the CIA was finished." She answered his question but left off the caveat that she needed the extra time she'd been back to reach her decision before she finally came to see him.
He clinched his hands in fists at his sides, trying to repress the need to reach out and touch her, to prove with his senses that she was real. "How long have you been back in Washington?"
"Almost two weeks." Her voice was so soft, as if she was betraying a deep secret and his mind began to race. All of the little bits and pieces that he had catalogued since spotting her standing near his door.
She wouldn't meet his eyes. She would glance at him and then her eyes would shift off to some point in the distance. She was trying to hide something from him. Aaron took in her posture, her body language along with the length of time she had been back and his eyes widened in shocked realization.
"You're leaving aren't you? This is goodbye." His voice was husky with the effort of controlling his emotions.
Her eyes connected with his and finally her face softened. "I…."
The sound of a car door closing down the street halted their conversation, he looked around them, and this was not the place to be having this discussion. "No, come, let's go inside."
Hotch placed his hand low on her back and guided her into his apartment building. A part of him was thrilled at having a reason to touch her, to prove her tangibility and as they moved through the doorway and down the hall he was given a second stronger one.
Floating on the air around them was the soft delicate scent of the hand cream she used on her nails, to keep the damaged areas soft. It was an indication of her level of stress that she needed to use it at all, as Reid had often pointed out, she only picked at her nails when she was upset or stressed. And the apprehension grew with this new knowledge.
He almost had to close his eyes at the rush of emotions that overcame him with the smell. The desire to simple wrap his arms around her and bury his face in her neck, breath in her sent, was almost more than he could control. As a result of his surging emotions, he closed himself off and didn't attempt to talk to her on the way to his apartment.
They moved calmly through the building, their steps controlled and matched as they always were, but there was a sense of urgency in the air around them, the need to be behind closed doors and as the door clicked shut behind them, he finally gave into the impulses raging through his blood.
Aaron grabbed her elbow and spun her around to face him, quickly pulling her into a tight embrace, wrapping his strong arms around her. He buried his face in her neck, breathing deeply for the first time in months, the band around his chest finally loosening with the reassurance of her presence in his arms.
She wouldn't leave him.
He wouldn't allow it.
Somehow he would find a way to make her stay.
"I'm so sorry you had to go through all of this, that any of this was necessary." Her voice trembled with guilt for her part the drama surrounding their family.
He pulled back and looked into her eyes, keeping his arms around her, not wanting to allow her even that distance. "No, Emily, I'm the one who's sorry. We made a decision without your input that took away your life."
Her face softened with a slight smile and she reached up to cup his cheek before dropping her hand at the last second.
"I've always trusted you, above all others, to do what was right for me, for the team… for our family. I know you well enough to know that if there was any other option available, you wouldn't have chosen this one." She pulled away from him then and the loss of her heat felt like impending doom. "You never have to apologize for trying to keep me safe, for keeping the team safe, I would have made the same choice."
"But you didn't trust me enough, did you?" She looked at him quizzically when he paused. "You should have come to me. The moment you knew that you could be in danger, you should have come to me."
She dropped her head in shame because she knew she should have, but at the time the decision was made, it all made perfect sense to her.
"I just... I didn't…" Her voice trailed off, not able to explain to him her reasons, not sure of them any longer herself.
"I know." And he did, he wouldn't have told anyone either, it was one of the reason he didn't get as upset as the others did, disappointed yes, but he understood her reasons for keeping her past a secret. He and Prentiss really were too much alike sometimes.
She moved away from him then, turning to stand in front of the window that over looked the park behind his building. A lead ball dropped into his stomach because what was coming next was going to change everything.
"The State Department has given me two choices. They can resurrect Emily Prentiss and I can return to my old life as if the last few months have never happened. Or as a reward for services to my country I can let her rest and start over again."
His brow furrowed at that and he realized that perhaps he should have done a little more digging into her past after her "death". But in the end it didn't matter because this was where she belonged, here with the team, with him. "And this was something you had to think about?"
Prentiss glanced back at him over her shoulder and that same overwhelming sadness was back in her eyes. At some point in the future they were going to have to sit and have a talk about what caused that look, one that he had seen more and more often in the last few months before they found out about Ian Doyle.
But still she remained silent.
"What about the team? They need you." He moved over to her trying to get her to face him, face the discussion they were going to have, but she moved around the couch so that the physical distance remained between them.
"I've seen them all in the last week and they're moving on Hotch, just as they should. In time all I'll be is a fond memory. New people will come and others will go, it's just the way that life is."
Aaron felt an overwhelming anger fill his chest at the defeated sound in her voice.
"That's not true. You mean so much to them and you would walk away? You wouldn't give them the chance to have you back?"
"Hotch…" He held up his hand and cut her off before she could start to justify her choices to him.
All he could think about was the assessments that he had to sit through, the pain, hurt, anger, sadness, that all of them had been feeling. He shook his head in anger that she would take away the chance to make all of that disappear.
He stomped around the couch and gripped her upper arms in his hands, forcing her to face him, not allowing her to box away what he was saying to her.
"No Emily. You have no idea what it's been like with you being gone. Reid is struggling with his vocation over your loss, he's directionless and alone and he won't share what's bothering him. He shuts it all up inside because you were the one that he talk to about things like this, we can't get him to open up."
"Garcia has lost her spark because she doesn't have you to share things with anymore. She feels like the laughter is gone from her life because she doesn't have the girlfriend that sat with her out in the quad and made jokes about the new recruits and told dirty jokes to her on cases that got to be too much for her to deal with."
Emily let out a watery smile at the memory and felt a tear trickle down her cheek. Without thought Hotch reached up and brushed it away, this was what he wanted. For her to feel their loss but it still didn't make it any easier to be doing this to her.
"Dave is wrapping himself up completely in Seaver because he's afraid if he leaves her alone she'll be taken from us too and she's a part of the team now. It's what you had wanted and he's trying so hard to make sure she survives because he blames himself for not seeing what was wrong with you sooner."
"Morgan needed you this week, your quiet strength and unquestionable faith in him. He made the right choice in the end but it was hard for him, always a struggle, one that would have been easier if you had been there."
Emily finally closed her eyes, unwilling to look at him any longer as she felt the guilt well up in her. She wanted to go home but what kind of a life was it going to be. One that she spent all of her time wrapped up in the team and the rest of it remained in stasis because she was in love from a distance?
They were giving her the chance to open a new page in her life, perhaps move on from all of this and finally find happiness for herself. Something she had never been allowed to do because of Interpol, because of the choices she made, decisions that shaped her and she wasn't allowed to share with anyone. She could leave all of that behind and become someone new, someone of her own making.
She had to hide so much of her life from anyone she met because her work had been classified and restricted. But this man in front of her she could share these things with, she would be allowed, if only…
"Emily, look at me." He reached up and cupped her face in his warm palms, praying that she understood all that he wasn't saying. "How can you walk away from us? We are your family, you left to protect us and now you have the chance to come home and you have to think about it?"
She shook her head violently because in the end it wasn't enough for her anymore. She was forty years old and she was tired of being alone. She opened her eyes and met his with a fire bourn of laying it all out in the open and having nothing to lose anymore.
"And what about you Hotch, what am I to you?"
He could see in her expression what she was asking for what she wanted from him and shock filled his body at what it meant, what it could mean, for him, for them.
He dropped his hands and jerked back from her as if he'd been slapped, it might have just been an instinctive reaction to asking to share and be open with someone else, but still she let out a short huff. In five years the man had never opened up her, she didn't know why she thought that now would be any different from all the other times.
"The team is strong Hotch; they are going to survive because that's what they do. I'm already gone to them; this isn't going to hurt them anymore because they aren't going to know I was ever back." Her voice was cold and hard now and he knew instantly that he had hurt her and far more than he had intended. He didn't mean to pull away from her but the realization caused him to pull back just because it was so unexpected, that she would be so up front about something they had been dancing about and ignoring for longer than he wanted to admit.
She crossed her arms and moved back to the window and the black void that lay beyond. He screwed up and he knew that but he didn't know how to fix it. He could tell her everything she wanted to hear, what he suspected she wanted to hear and while it would be true it was just words now because she had to ask for them.
Emily grinded her teeth in annoyance with herself; for getting her hopes up, from the way he had reacted when she first appeared to him. She stood there and willed him to say something, anything that would change her mind but she was right in the beginning, she didn't belong in this life anymore.
All of the softer feelings she had been having when she saw him leaning against his car hardened with the knowledge that all she was to him, all she would ever be, was a function of the team.
Emily turned back to him, resolute in her decision to go. "I've already made my choice but I promised JJ that I wouldn't leave without saying good bye, without letting you know that Doyle was gone and that I was safe."
Hotch didn't know what to say, what would make her stay. They needed her, wasn't that enough for her?
"How can you walk away?" His voice was broken and soft, as she had often heard when he was trying to repress what he was feeling but that wasn't enough. Six months ago it would have been, but her realization when she was gone changed everything.
If he didn't want her, want the love she could offer him, she would find someone that did. She wasn't going to be happy any more living a half-life.
"Doyle is not the only skeleton in my closet. They are giving me the change to be free of all of the work that I did with Interpol. I won't have to hide half of who I am anymore, afraid of relationships because of my secrets and no one else will come looking for Emily Prentiss. All I have to do is choose to just let her be dead. The team will move on in the end and find someone new to fill the holes I left behind. And I will finally have chance to be free, to be happy."
She moved around the room till she was standing in front of him, giving him one last chance to change her mind. "Given those choices, which would you choose?"
Hotch's eyes darted about the room; he couldn't even look at her. She let out a silent sigh and tried to choke down the pain in her chest, without another word she turned and headed for the door. Her hand was just about to wrap around the cool metal when she finally heard something from him.
His voice, when it came out was so soft he feared she wouldn't hear him. "Stay, for me."
"What?" Her hand dropped to her side but she didn't move away from the door.
"Given the choice, stay… for me."
Emily turned back and looked at the top of his head. His chin was pressed against his chest and he was staring at the floor. His shoulders, encased in his black dress shirt were slumped forward and he looked so defeated.
She moved away from the door and came to stand in front of him. She tipped her head down and tried to get a good look at him but with his position and the lighting in the room there was no chance. She would be going into this one blind, with no clue as to what he was thinking, but she had opened herself up this far, there was no turning back now but there could be so much to gain if she was right.
"For you?"
"I need you Emily. Stay here, for me."
It wasn't enough, she needed to hear him say it. To give voice to what they were both feeling, to give them a chance. "Why do you need me?"
She was going to make him say it. Aaron tossed his head back and stared at the ceiling. He could feel his throat convulsively work as he swallowed.
He had one chance to make this work and if he did it wrong she was going to walk out the door and never come back.
Hotch dropped his head and met her stare dead on, leveling her with a look that contained such heat and intensity that she stepped back in surprise from the sudden shift in his manner. He stepped forward and bridged the gap between them, till they were standing together, pressed chest to chest.
His trembling hands came up and framed her pale cheeks; slowly he tipped her face up to his own and gently brushed her hair back so that he could look at her, clear and unobstructed for the first time that night.
"I know what you need. You don't have to go somewhere else to find it; you don't have to hide who you are. I can make you happy Emily. Stay here for me."
Aaron closed his eyes and prayed, prayed with everything he had, that he was right about this and that she would stay.
Slowly he lowered his head until his lips teasingly brushed hers, gently, feeling the soft fullness against his own. He just rested there, their lips barely touching, sharing the same breath. For a brief moment, there was nothing and then she let out a soft sigh that sounded suspiciously like his name.
Aaron moaned from deep in his throat and pressed his lips firmly against hers, sliding them back and forth. He slid his arms around her, cupping the back of her head with one hand and allowing the other to band around behind her, holding her tight to his own frame, allowing nothing to come between the two of them, not even air.
He traced the line of her lips gently with tip of his tongue and dove in as she opened her mouth, possessing her, worshiping her, showing her what there was for her to stay for. His movements were desperate and frantic as he willed her to understand what he was saying, what he would give her, if she would just give him the chance.
Emily let out a soft moan at the sweet pressure of his lips, the feel of his arms sliding down to her waist, as he lifted her feet off the floor. Her hands on longer idle slid along his arms and up over his shoulders, wrapping around his neck, holding him, gratified that she was right and allowing herself to become completely lost in his embrace.
When air finally became necessary Aaron pulled back from her, allowing her body to slide down the length of his own till she once again stood on her own two feet. He leaned down and rested his forehead against hers, looking into her eyes; centimeters from his own.
He let out a soft smile, filled with hope, at the feel of her panted breaths against his skin.
"I love you. I'll make you happy." his voice soft and questioning, so terribly hesitant and she smiled, as if there was any other choice, "Stay here, with me?"
She ran her fingers through his short black hair and pulled away far enough so that he could clearly see the decision in her eyes. This was what she needed, all that she needed.
"Yes."
The End
Author's Note: Lalala, and Emily finally comes home. I'm such a shipper, it's so sad. Lol. My poor brain spent so much time obsessing over this that I had to drop everything else I was working on to get this one out. So I hope you enjoyed. Feel free to drop me a note and let me know what you think.
I'm still working on a much requested sequel to "Things Overheard" and another new story but both are still far from being done. So to tide you over, here's my idea for Emily to come home… Which is looking more and more likely by the day since it's been announced that Paget's pilot didn't get picked up by NBC (although I don't know if it's 'official' confirmation or not). And we likely won't get word of her possible return to CM until after May 28 when she is required to tell them if she wants to return or not. So… keep your fingers crossed.
Blessings, Brandywyne.