Sleep
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, Masashi Kishimoto does. I also don't own this song.
A/N: Hey!! This is my sad attempt at angst! This song is SLEEP by MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE! I love this song!! Warning: one-sided SasuSaku! If you squint, there's ItaSaku! The song lyrics represent Sasuke's thoughts, sort of.
Key:
"Talking"
Song lyrics
Thoughts
"Voice recording"
"Like last night, they are not like tremors, they are worse than tremors,
they are these terrors. And it's like, it feels like as if somebody
was gripping my throat and squeezing and..."
Some say, now suffer all the children
And walk away a savior,
Or a madman and polluted
From gutter institutions.
I was taking a walk at the ungodly hour of three in the morning. I couldn't sleep without getting nightmares of that night in the Forest of Death. Sasuke's pain... the face of that snake Orochimaru... the black marks flaming across his skin. My body shuddered as the wind caressed my bare arms.
As I was walking towards the western gates of Konoha, I sensed a familiar chakra a few meters in front of me.
I've always had a way with chakra, I guess. That's the only thing I've ever been able to do. I'm so weak. I mused to myself. That's when I saw him.
Hm. Sasuke-kun? What is he doing here at this hour... no.
I thought, panicking, as sudden comprehension dawned on me. I knew I was too weak to stop him by force.
I've always been weak, weak, weak...
"S-Sasuke-kun? What are you doing here?" I stuttered, smiling a weak smile.
I've always been weak, weak, weak...
"Sakura." the said Uchiha muttered, "Go Home."
"What are you doing out here, Sasuke-kun? You have your pack on." I tried again, to get answers from him. But it was too late, and I already knew that. My tears were to their brim. I knew I would cry my last cry for him tonight. It was chosen for me from the moment I had my eyes on him.
One tear fell, and surely, before he leaves, my tears will have all fallen.
"Sakura, go home." He repeated, his voice taking that familiar tone of annoyance, somehow, always pointed at her.
Does he truly hate me?
"Come on, S-Sasuke-kun! Let's w-walk home t-together." I muttered from behind my tears. I held out my hand weakly.
"Sakura, go home. Are you so stupid that you can't comprehend this! Go. Home." He said, slowly, more forcefully this time.
"You know, Sasuke-kun, those words are so mean, and yet, that was the most you've said to me." I said sadly, "Sasuke-kun, you don't have to go to a pedophile snake like Orochimaru. We could become stronger here. Me, you, Naruto, and Kakashi-sensei will train us..." I was babbling now, I knew, but anything to keep him here longer.
"Sakura. I'm not staying here in this weak village." Sasuke was getting madder by the minute, but I didn't care.
"Then stay here for me..." before I could finish, Sasuke interrupted.
"Why would I want to stay with a weakling like you?" Sasuke spat.
That hurt more than his rejection to my offers from my years of pursuing him. Confession was my only hope.
As if there was any hope to begin with. My tears were falling now.
Don't you breathe for me,
Undeserving of your sympathy,
Cause there ain't no way that I'm sorry for what I did.
"Because I love you, baka!! I'm way passed that foolish crush I had once. I love you so much that I cry for you because of the pain you must feel!" I couldn't stop now, "I cry in the middle of the night, knowing that my parents are right down the hall! I cry because I have someone to tuck me in at night, to kiss my forehead, to tell me everything is okay! I know I will never understand the pain you go through, but I want to at least try! Right now, you're acting like your brother!" I saw Sasuke's eyes widen in anger, and he tried grabbing for my throat, but I dodged his hand and continued, "Sasuke-kun, you're killing someone that loves you right now. At least let me go with you! I'll go with you and betray this village for you, please..."
And through it all
How could you cry for me?
Cause I don't feel bad about it.
So shut your eyes,
Kiss me goodbye,
And sleep.
Just sleep.
Suddenly, Sasuke came up from behind me. My eyes widen at his speed.
"Sakura..." Sasuke whispered. Something wet hit my shoulder.
...
...
...
"Thank you." He said, pressing a pressure point at my neck.
All the while, my inner was laughing.
I've always been weak, weak, weak...
Time skip
The hardest part is letting go of your dreams.
It's been four, very long years since that day. The day after, I awoke screaming his name.
Sasuke-kun!!
And now, it's happening all over again. But this time, I'm not so weak. This time, I will bring Sasuke back. I will not fail. Naruto failed the first and second time, and see where that has gotten him!
I tried to heal him, I really did!
I'm sorry Naruto, I couldn't do it!! I'm sorry!
That not only changed his life, but also my own. I went on a training trip, lasting three years. I fought with Akatsuki, heck, I fell in love with one of them, and now he's dead!! He told me why he did what he did, but I still love him, and I swore that I would not love anyone else but him. I couldn't even if I tried anyway. He gave me a mission, and I will complete it, as well as my S-class one from Lady Tsunade. I will not fail. I would kill myself if I did.
After all, I am only a shell of who I used to be. And now, I must capture the one who murdered my loved one.
Sasuke Uchiha.
A drink for the horror that I'm in,
For the good guys, and the bad guys,
For the monsters that I've been.
So, that leads me to where I am at the moment: Before my enemy, former teammate, and ex-crush, Sasuke.
"Sakura, huh?" Sasuke smirked. "So, after I defeated dobe, they just gave up and sent you?"
To my former self, that would have hurt. But I'm not my former self now am I? My mask did not crack, and Sasuke's smirk wavered.
"Sasuke Uchiha, I have been ordered to capture and return you to Konoha, dead or alive. I also have another mission: To tell you the truth." I said, spreading my feat farther apart and preparing myself for battle, "Do not underestimate me."
Sasuke snickered, "No matter what I think of you, you shall always be-"
I cut him off, throwing three kunai with deadly precision at his torso. His eyes widened and he dodged, jumping up and landing a few feet away from his former position. Before he landed, I already had done a few hand signs and activated the Earth Decapitation jutsu. His feat landed on the ground and he immediately sunk into the soil. He struggled a bit, and then poofed, being replaced by a wooden log. He came up behind me, kunai at hand and slashed at my neck. I ducked and kicked him from under himself, causing him to slip. He caught himself, doing a handstand, and tried to cut at my ankles, but I jumped away. We both stood up, only slightly tired.
"Hn. So, you learned a few tri-"
Before he even finished his sentence, I had already captured him in a chakra binding jutsu the heshowed me.
"Never waste time talking. That is the first rule I learned from him. You are weak." I said.
"Hn. I'm not weak, I already defeated him. I avenged my clan! I killed Itachi!" Sasuke yelled, a crazed smirk growing on his face.
"Well. That is exactly why I'm here. You killed Itachi-kun!" Sasuke's eyes widened at the suffix, "You killed the father of my child! You should know how it feels not to have a father!!" I yelled, letting my eyes hold the anger and sadness it held back before. "It's all your fault, Sasuke! You killed him! You killed Naruto's dream!! You killed Kakashi-sensei!!" Sasuke interrupted my ranting.
"What did I do to Naruto, he escaped alive, I made sure of that!" Sasuke asked.
"Sasuke, he's crippled." I whispered. I sighed. "That's all in the past anyway. I have to complete this mission."
I walked up to Sasuke and hoisted him up on to my back, and began my trek. After all, it would only take a few hours. An hour into the journey, I finally got the nerve to ask.
"So, Sasuke-teme," Sasuke flinched at the suffix. Does she hate me that much? "Did you feel content when you...killed him?" my voice cracked.
Sasuke thought about it, and with sudden horror, came to a conclusion.
"No."
...
...
...
A broken sob escaped my lips. So, Itachi's death was pointless. All it did was give Sasuke Mangekyou Sharingan.
My eyes hardened. "Sasuke, before Itachi left to confront you, he left me with... the truth. He wanted you to know why he massacred the Uchihas." I sighed.
Three cheers for tyranny,
Unapologetic apathy,
Cause there ain't no way that I'm coming back again.
-Spoiler-
"Before the land of fire was discovered, land was own by clans. The two main clans were the Uchiha clan and the Senju clan. These two clans were rivals. They sent their most powerful ninja to battle for this land. They sent Madara Uchiha and Hashirama Senju, the first Hokage. They battled, and they were evenly matched, but eventually, Hashirama won. People thought for a long time that Madara was dead, but they were wrong. He somehow stayed alive. He hasn't revealed himself until the Uchiha massacre. He helped Itachi-kun kill the Uchiha clan. Itachi was born a prodigy, and was perfect for the job. The head of the clan, your father, was using Itachi as a spy to the ANBU teams, and to keep tabs on what's happening in the world. The Uchiha clan was still hot about Madara's "death," and was planning to over turn the Hokage. Little did they know that there spy was actually a spy for the Hokage. Itachi, ever so loyal to the council of elders wishes, told them what the Uchiha clan was planning to do. He was ordered to eliminate them. All of them. He had help from Madara, who appeared to him to help. But he failed his mission. He kept you alive Sasuke. He really loves his older brother." My eyes softened.
"You're a liar!" Sasuke snarled.
"Think about it Sasuke! Has Itachi ever shown hostility to you. Sure, for everyone else, but never for you. Don't you remember anything about how he loved you. Remember the final fight you had? I was there!! Watching from above. he wanted me to see him die!" my eyes filled with tears as I continued walking.
-Flashback-
Itachi's bloodied fingers were fast approaching Sasuke's eyes, for he was about to take them for an eternal Sharingan. He was about to touch them as Sasuke shuddered and blanched. Itachi then tapped his fingers on Sasuke's forehead, just like he did when they were younger. Sasuke looked up in shock to see Itachi smiling sadly.
"I'm sorry Sasuke. This is the last time." Itachi coughed out before collapsing, pale and cold, with a peaceful smile on his face.
-End Flashback-
Both Sasuke and I had that flashback, I knew by just looking at his broken face.
-End Spoiler- (A/N: It wasn't Sakura who told him, of course. But what happened to Itachi and Sasuke when they fought really happened.)
And through it all
How could you cry for me?
Cause I don't feel bad about it.
So shut your eyes,
Kiss me goodbye,
And sleep.
Just sleep.
"Now do you understand how revenge gets you no where?" I asked softly.
Something wet hit my shoulder as I felt him taking shuddering breaths.
The hardest part's the awful things that I've seen.
"Everything was a lie. Everything." Sasuke kept muttering nonsense like this throughout the rest of the walk to Konahagakure.
"...Sometimes I see flames. And sometimes
I see people that I love dying and... it's always..."
"Shhh, Sasuke, just sleep..." he kept taking shuddering breaths.
Just sleep.
Just sleep.
Just sleep.
Just sleep.
Just sleep.
Finally, his head was resting on my shoulder, showing that he was almost asleep, his breathing slowing down.
Sasuke, you really didn't deserve this...
"Sasuke, you've been living a lie, but I won't be apart of it. I will join you on whatever road you choose."I whispered. Sasuke smiled, a true smile.
"Thank you." I smiled.
I finally understand why you told me thank you all those years ago... I thought as the Konoha gates were appearing over the trees.
"And I can't... I can't ever wake up."