Title: Animagus Problems
Author: Arawna
Disclaimer: Anything relating to the world of HP does not belong to me.
Summary: Harry's out after curfew when he's caught in a compromising position. No, not that kind of compromising position, you perv…
Animagus Problems:
Well fuck. Fuck, fuck, and double fuck. You know, I probably should listen to Hermione every once in a while, at the very least. She kept nagging about how I could get caught, killed, - 'or worse' as she puts it - expelled. But, honestly, who would give a second thought to a roaming cat? There's been many times, while wandering around at midnight, that I've seen other students' cats prowling, looking for mice or searching for something to do other than sleep. How would a teacher know that the black cat with an odd white patch on its forehead was me? They wouldn't. They would look at it in an annoyed manner then be on their way. It always happens. Snape's seen me many, many times without deducting points from Gryffindor, so I'm to assume that my form is almost perfect. Well, of course the form is perfect, it's just holding the form that isn't, but that's another story. The present story is much more of an emergency.
Again with the series of 'fuck's. And again with the 'how in the hell was I supposed to know that I should've listened to Herm?' Merlin, I can be stupid sometimes, but I guess that little fact can be attributed to me possessing a Y chromosome, so it's inevitable. Stupid, stupid child is the mantra that's running itself through my head at the moment. For once, I have to agree with what my brain has to tell me: I am a stupid child. If I get out of this alive, I swear to Merlin that I will never wander the halls again at odd hours of the night and/or morning in my animagus form.
However, the prospect of escaping this Hell alive is dwindling by the second. All eyes are staring directly at me, but all of the questions are directed at the person whose lap I'm in. Yes, that is my current predicament. I am trapped in the Slytherin common room, being thoroughly petted by the one, the only, Draco Malfoy. I mean - WHAT THE FUCK?! If that wasn't torture enough, I swear I heard him claim to keep me as his pet. Like hell I'm gonna let him do that! If I could, I'd change right here, right now, and give him a piece of my mind - and possibly a fist to the face, but that's not the point. Unfortunately, the fact that if I were to do that I may die kinda puts a damper on my idea. Instead, I will sit and take the abuse that the blonde seems to think I deserve, even if said abuse is him scratching right under my chin and -
No! Must! NOT! PURR!! That is a sign of weakness at his hands! A sign that I am enjoying his ministrations; which I am not!!! But the way he seems to get the hallow of my throat is just…purrrrrrrrr…
Wait…What? I know, I know, I'm not following the conversation much, but if that Parkinson bitch just suggested what I think she did, she will have hell to pay when I'm free and turn back into myself. I do not find it amusing in the least to use me as a target to practice for Death Eater Training Camp. One can only think of how bad the curses and hexes they'd use on a poor helpless creature. Okay, so I'm neither poor nor helpless, but that's not the point. I can't believe she had the audacity to suggest that. Screw the waiting 'til I turn back, I should claw her eyes out right -
Huh? He did not just defend me, the Boy Who Lived Half a Dozen Times. Of course, he's actually defending the cat, not the boy - er man - er man-boy. Fuck this, I'm seventeen, I'm a man. Anyway, he's defending the cat, not the man, so why are these annoying little insects dancing around in my stomach?
Oh, there he goes with the scratching again. Mmm, I may reconsider his wanting to have me as his pet idea…
Aw, hell no. He is not naming me Harry! That's already my name!!! I am not going to be coincidentally named the same name by the boy - er man - man-boy? He's seventeen, too, so he's a man, too, no matter how much I don't wanna admit that he's like me. Anyway, I am not going to be named the same name by this man(ish thing). I cannot believe I am hearing this; and judging by the faces of the Slytherins, they can't either.
Oh, that's funny. If I could laugh in this form, I would. No one is going to believe that, Draco. Er, Malfoy. Definitely Malfoy. No one is going to believe that you named this cat Harry because you could then brag that you own Harry Potter and that you have him in the palm of your hand. They know that there's another reason, a reason I myself do not know, but they know, so that's all that matters.
Oh, there they go with talk of using me as target practice.
Sigh Merlin, could this get night get anymore hellish?
Aw fuck, I had to go an asked the universal 'do not ask when in a tight spot' question. It was bad enough that I am trapped in the Slytherin Dungeons, but does he really have to take me up to his private room? Can't I just 'sleep' in the common room? Fuck, now he's claiming this is for my 'protection' from the other Slytherins. Shit. Nononononon!!! Anywhere but his dorm room!
See, this is where the other story comes in that I mentioned earlier. Well, uh, there's one, little, tiny problem with this whole animagus thing - erm, two actually: One - when I fall asleep, I, uh, turn back to my human form. And two - um…I haven't managed to get the whole 'turn back while still wearing clothing' thing down pat yet. I've seen Pettigrew and Sirius do it many, many times, but I just can't grasp that little part of the transformation. Don't look at me like that! I'm new at this!! Sort of. Anyway, how was I supposed to know that I'd end up trapped in Draco Malfoy's dorm room for the night?!
TBC…