I'm feeling sappy right now, so this is what you get. It was a fanfic gone wrong, turned into a story, so hope you like! I own nothing.
I sat in the front of the church, surrounded by family and friends. I remember the first time I was in this church; I was getting married that day, now on this day I was going to a funeral. The funeral of my best friend, one of my first friends in fact, he was more than that though, he was my husband of the last sixty-eight years. Jacob and I had married when I was twenty-eight. We had seven children, yes I know a lot, but we wanted a big family.
Our first child was a boy, we had him the second year we were married; we named him Billy, after Jacob's father who died the same year we had him. Our second child was also a boy, we named him Charlie, after my father, he didn't die until about twenty years ago; we had him when I was thirty-three. My third pregnancy was twins, Jade and James.
I smiled through the tears on my face; James and Jade were sweeties, the quietest of our group. They were always together, even now, they lived close by. All of our children lived in La Push, they never left, and for that we were grateful, but that was only our first four children. When I was thirty-eight, I found out I was pregnant again, once again with twins, this time both girls, Amber and Rachel, and then when I was forty I was pregnant again, this time only one little girl who we named Alice, after my once best friend.
I was ninety-six now and had many grandchildren and many, many great-grandchildren. Jacob had finally started to age when I was thirty-three, now lying in his coffin, he didn't look like himself. I felt a fresh wave of tears wash over my face. With the help of two of my grandchildren, Lily and James I made my way closer to the coffin, the coffin that held my husband.
I reached out and brushed his long grey hair away from his face. His face in death was so different than his face in life. His face, his smile were so different, I looked away. I couldn't see him like this, but then again, I couldn't not look at him, at the face that I had fallen in love with so many years before. Gone was the man that I had fallen in love with, he no longer graced this earth with his happiness. I would no longer wake up to see his happy, smiling face in the kitchen, trying to cook breakfast.
I took James arm, and they helped me back to my seat. I sat down and the preacher stepped up to the podium. "We're gathered here today to remember the life of Jacob Sam Black. If you knew him, you knew that his life was filled with happiness and joy. He loved his family with a passion. He has left behind his wife, Isabella Marie Black, his seven children, Billy, Charlie, Jade, James, Amber, Rachel, and Alice and their wives and husbands; his fifteen grandchildren and their wives and husbands, and his twenty great-grandchildren, with more on the way."
I tuned the man out, no one knew Jacob, at least not my Jacob; the Jacob that I loved only the family knew; the family that we made together. The tears poured out like a river on my face. I grabbed the offered tissues from my child, and tried to wipe them away, but they kept coming.
I remember when Jacob first told me he loved me; we were on First Beach, on our log. Even now, no one in La Push ever sits on that log, it was Jacob's and mine. The old, white log shared so much of my memories with Jacob, and now that he's gone, I don't think I'll be able to sit there anymore.
I know how Jacob wanted me to live my life after he died, it was one of the first things he told be when we got married, just in case he died during an attack. I listened; I can still remember every word he told me. As our life went on, and our family grew he changed it to fit us, but I still remembered every word he told me.
He told me not to mourn him, to go on with my life. The first time he told me to find love again, or at least to find Edward. I could say his name now without flinching, without it bothering me in anyway. Edward had left when I was 18, he told me why, but it isn't important anymore. All I remember from that day was being so mad at him, for doing this to me again. I went running to Jake, again, and he was there, waiting for me, never telling me "I told you so."
I'm getting off topic, the last time he told me what to do, he told me to not mourn him, to know that he loved me with everything he had, that I shouldn't push away the memories we had and shared; which meant that I couldn't say away from our log. The most important thing he told me was that no matter what I do or did, he was still happy that I came to him that day. I knew what he meant, that if I still loved Edward more than him, he made up for that in his love to me. I remember trying to tell him, that I didn't, that I loved him more, but he wouldn't let me.
A fresh wave of tears ran down my face, and I noticed that the preacher was done, and my children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren were all watching me, along with the preacher. I nodded my head, and made my way to the front of the church, again with the help of James and Lily.
I looked out at the sea of people, the people who had come to say good-bye to the great man that was my husband. I told them of my memories, the important ones. I told them what Jake was to me, and what he had done for me that day when I went running to him. I told them that there would never be a greater man in La Push, because he had done so many things for us, for his community. All along the tears rolled down my face, and I made no motion to stop them.
I looked around the church one last time, and that was when I saw him. The bronze hair and pale, perfect skin gave him away. I closed my eyes softly and nodded my head, and when I opened my eyes again he was gone, but in his place was a ghost, the ghost of the man I loved.
It was my Jake, Jake looking like he did when he told me he loved me, young and full of energy. James and Lily helped me back to my seat, and I let them, didn't even think about protesting, because now that I had seen Jake, I felt complete, once again.
The rest of the day passed in a haze, at the end of the day I told my family that I loved them no matter what, and told them good-bye, after that I wrote them a letter; I knew what would happen tonight. I changed into my nightgown and brushed my hair, making sure my letter was perfect before climbing into bed, and closing my eyes for the last time on earth.
When I opened my eyes again, Jake was there, shaking his head at me, telling me that I gave up. But I told him, no, I realized that in order for me not to give up, I couldn't stay on earth.
I'm crying right now, such a sap.
