THIS IS MADNESS! Raz tries knitting, while Milla has gone cubist in an attempt to impress Sasha! Is there lunacy gas on the loose at Whispering Rock? Includes Sasha on a sugar high and Dogen becomes a robot. Yes, I wrote this after consuming vast amounts of sugar. No more questions.

Katez-chan says: O hai. Yes, this is a lunacyfic. xD Never written one before, or an angstfic... I'll get right on that second one. Later. Also, Sasha gets hit with a Love Dart, but that didn't fit in the summary.

Disclaimer: Why do I even bother? Why would I write fanfiction if I owned it?

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"Sasha! Are you awake?" an overly chirpy voice. Sasha groaned. It was far too early for dealing with Milla, especially after not having slept for at least ninety-six hours. (that's four days, for those not gifted with mathematics.)

"Yes, Milla, I'm still awake." ...oops, there was that stupid 'still' again. Why did he always blurt that out?

"...still?! Sasha, do you mean to imply that you didn't sleep at ALL last night?!"

"It should hardly be a surprise, after all the time that you've known me."

"Just how long have you been awake?!" the Mental Minx asked, stepping daintily down into Sasha's lab.

"Um... about 96 hours, I believe."

"96?!"

"Isn't that like a sexual position?" The youngest and, possibly, most annoying Psychonaut ever rolled down the stairs, his levitation ball evaporating as he reached the bottom.

"First off, I believe you're thinking of sixty-nine," was the calm reply. Too calm. Way too calm.

Milla was still staring at Razputin, one eye twitching slightly.

"And second, why do you know that?"

"...don't ask."

"I won't." Sasha readjusted his prescription sunglasses. "Now if you don't have any reason for being here, please leave."

"As a matter of fact, I do have a reason for being here," Raz said brightly. "I was bored and wanted to bug you."

"I would just have told you to go bother Milla." Sasha received a playful slap from her.

"...and she most likely would have told you to go bother the Coach." he finished, adjusting his glasses once more.

"But that's not as much fun," the boy whined, spinning around in a wheelie chair.

"Yes, he just gets angry and gives amusing answers rather than telling you to go away."

Raz pouted and meh'd for a few more seconds before leaving in a very small huff. A hiff.

"...where were we?" Sasha asked, turning back to Milla.

"ah, yes." she cleared her throat and conjured up a small crop of tears from absolutely nowhere. "Why don't you love me?!" she sobbed. "Is it my taste in music?!"

Sasha shrank back into his leather wheelie chair, unsure what to do. He'd never been comfortable with crying women. "Uh... Um... I believe we were actually discussing how obscenely late I stay up."

"Uh?"she looked up from where her face had been buried in her hands, mascara smeared. "Oh yeah, that's right. Sorry about that."

"..."

"...but in any case, is it my taste in music? Or what? I just d- don't know what to do..." she started to sniffle again.

"Uh umm I guh n mmm."

"....what was that supposed to be?!"

"T- that was supposed to be me, not knowing what to say."

"Oh. I guess Katez is just not good at articulating sounds in writing?"

"Shh. You're breaking the fourth wall."

"...isn't talking about breaking the fourth wall breaking the fourth wall?"

I said shhh.

Okay, fine.

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"Lili?"

"Hmm?"

"Your birthday is coming up, right?"

"Mm-hmm."

"What do you want?"

"Mmm."

"...that's not an answer." Raz's eyes strayed around the room, finally alighting on a small trash can where a pair of bright pink legwarmers were draped over the side. "...Lili, why'd you throw away your legwarmers?"

"Hmm? Oh, that. They were too small, and anyways they had holes in them..." she trailed off, absorbed once more into her magazine.

A brilliant idea formed in the brilliant mind of Razputin Aquato.

HE COULD MAKE LILI SOME LEGWARMERS. :D

It was perfect! They were obviously something she needed, and a handmade gift would be best. Besides, the only moneyish substance he possessed was a pocketful of arrowheads. Not exactly redeemable for cash, nor could they directly buy anything birthdaygiftlike. All he needed to do was learn how to knit.

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Katez-chan says: so that was chapter one. :3