Look After You

by cdrsheppard

Sheppard is desperately in need of rescue. When the IOA forbids it, mutiny ensues. Rodney struggles to keep a promise. Sheppard's team teaches him his true worth. Woolsey is new and learns Sheppard's code. Whump! Beg. seas 5 Team/Shep fic

1. Chapter 1

Title: Look After You
Author: ravenxmen / n7cdrsheppard

Fandom: Stargate Atlantis

Summary: Sheppard
is in need of rescue. When the IOA forbids it, mutiny ensues. Rodney
struggles to keep a promise. Sheppard's team teaches him (Sheppard)
his true worth. Beg. of season 5. Loose time line, not specific.

Type/Pairing:
Friendship; Sheppard, McKay, Beckett, Teyla, Ronon, Lorne, Zelenka,
Woolsey, Weir
Hurt/comfort /Angst/humor

Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Character death implied, strong language, graphic
descriptions
Note: I have opted to use Carson, rather than Jennifer.
Not a big Keller fan. Sorry.
Disclaimer: I do not own and do not profit from any SGA characters.
Word count: 31,317

Look After You

******************CHAPTER 1

Zelenka threw his hands up in frustration. "Kuz svinstvo! Sakra
Rodney!" He cussed in Czech. The power relay sputtered weakly like
the last twitch in a dying animal. Proè jsem ještì zkusit? I just
don't vidìt! Co je to možné?

He looked at his watch. It was time to dial Atlantis.
Zelenka punched in the address to the DHD and waited for the flash.
At this point, he wanted to run screaming right into the gate and not
come back. He resisted the urge.

The Inhabitants had been very good to Atlantis; providing rare
items that could not be obtained elsewhere. He wondered if they liked
him a bit better than Rodney. Everyone was still smiling and bringing
him things to eat, leading him to wonder how previous visits had gone
since Rodney had always come back in a bad mood.

"Atlantis, this is Zelenka. Do you read?"

"McKay here. Status?"

"I can't make it work. Either it has been damaged beyond repair or I
am missing something."He said with surrender.

"What do you mean you can't make it work? How hard can it be? You
have done this a dozen times." Rodney scoffed.

"Not here. Not on this device. It is concerning me."

"What? Is it saying rude things to you? Come on, you know what to do.
Just think it through. It is not that hard!"

Zelenka tried to keep his voice down. "Rodney, you are not
listening! There is something different in the energy signature. Like
some sort of carrier wave. It is blocking its function somehow. I
have not seen this sort of thing. Not on tech like this. I can't
isolate it without damaging the entire unit. It is not included on
the specs you have given me. Please, I need you to take a look at it."

"I just can't do that right now. You are going to have to deal with
it."

"Rodney, I have a bad feeling…"He said quietly.

"Look, is it going to blow up?"Rodney's sarcasm began to bloom.

"No, I don't think so."

"Is it on fire?"

"No, it is not. Not yet anyway."

"Look, try the Sheppard approach."

"And that would be?"

"Turn it off then back on again. See if it will power up directly
from zed."

Zelenka took a deep breath. "Even though that is insulting, I have
tried it. Never mind. I will see what I can come up with, but don't
be surprised if you have to come after all. It was your turn you
know."

"Yeah and I felt like taking a pass on podunk backwater electrical
repair. You'll be fine. Check in say…In an hour?"

"Alright. One hour. But if it is not working, you must come."

"Fine. McKay out."

Rodney leaned back from the control panel. He was irritated.
Sheppard was about to add to it.

"Why the pouty face McKay?" Sheppard asked as he appeared in front of
Rodney with a mischievous grin.

"What do you want because I am kind of busy." He said defensively as
he glanced at his still uneaten doughnut, sitting nearby.

"Wow, you are pouty McKay! Hey, I just heard my name…Something about
the Sheppard approach. Thought you might be baggin' on me. Were you?"
He narrowed his eyes at him.

"Me, ah…No, not really." Rodney flashed an innocent look.

"Mmm, `not really'…Very convincing. " Sheppard also noticed the
doughnut. " Speaking of that, why are you always so hard on Radek?
He's a good guy and quite good at what he does. Sometimes better
than…"

"He is not better!" Rodney blurted indignantly.

Sheppard grinned. "Calm down McKay. At any rate, you're still hard on
him. Why?"

"Hard on him? He just needs to be pushed once in a while. It makes
him work better. " Rodney said, as if it was a matter of fact.

"Like when I give you crap?" Sheppard asked as he picked up the sugar
coated confection and took a big bite, trying to be obvious in his
enjoyment.

Rodney watched in secret horror. He didn't dare try to reach for his
breakfast. "Yeah, kinda like that I guess."

Sheppard began to move away. "Hey, Don't be late to the briefing.
Woolsey gets pissed when you do." He said, chewing down another bite.

"He has only been here a few weeks and he is already put out of
shape? How long is he gonna last?" Rodney sniped.

Sheppard pointed at him, doughnut still in hand and on the way out of
the room. "Don't be late McKay. And don't be hard on him either.
Atlantis will do that all on its own.' His lanky figure disappeared
around a corner.

Rodney watched him go."Yeah, no kidding." He mumbled, mourning his
doughnut.

*******

Rodney dropped himself down in his chair post briefing."Well
that was a complete waste of my time!" He grumbled. "Military this…
Military that! Sheppard didn't need me there. I should just give him
a sharp stick so he can poke me…Oh crap! Zelenka! What time is it?
Two hours? It can't be!"

He clicked his head set to life. "Chuck, did Zelenka call in?"

"Just when you talked with him. Were you expecting him to check in so
soon afterward?"

"Yes. I will be right there." Rodney felt uneasy. He walked quickly
from his lab to the control room and parked himself in front of the
sensor console.
He pulled up the long range data. His face went pale
as he activated his head set."Sheppard! Woolsey! I need you in the
control room immediately! We have Wraith!"

*******

Sheppard set the jumper down near a grove of thick, burgundy
colored trees and quickly stood up from the pilot seat. The afternoon
light outside illuminated his angular face as he looked at his team.
He focused on the marines in the back of the ship.

"I want to scout the area. We move quietly in two teams of three.
Ronon, I want you to cover us from behind. Teyla, watch the ship.
Beckett, stay with McKay and stay in contact. We fall back to the
jumper at the first sign of Wraith or hostile contact. McKay, check
the DHD. We have no sign of Wraith at the moment but be on your
guard. Jumper two is standing by in orbit in case we need them.
Understood?"

Every one nodded and proceeded to exit the rear hatch. Sheppard
looked firmly at Rodney "Report immediately if you find anything."

Rodney's guilt flashed on his face."Sheppard, I am so…"

Armed and ready, Sheppard took a step towards him and softened his
expression."Now is not the time, besides, you couldn't have known.
We'll find him McKay. Stay alert and keep the shield up."
Sheppard disappeared out the hatch.

Rodney sighed and turned to Carson for some sort of direction.
Carson put his hand on Rodney's shoulder.

"Sheppard's right. We will find him. Have faith."

Rodney stared out the cockpit window in a rare moment of self
examination. "I know. I hope…Why am I such a selfish bastard? I know
the risks…What was I thinking? Oh, wait! I was thinking of myself…He
didn't deserve this."

"Rodney, stop it. Trust the Colonel. If anyone can find him, Sheppard
can. Let's go take a look. Come on."

Rodney snapped out of his self loathing and followed the doctor.
They wandered out a few yards and scanned the nearby area; now burned
to the ground. The small station that housed the damaged power
console was now a blackened mass of metal. It was useless. There was
no sign of life. The Wraith had taken considerable more time in
eradicating any evidence.

Rodney walked to the DHD and examined the data available. It had
suffered weapons damage but was still functional. He guessed it took
a parting shot as the Wraith left. With great effort he was able to
find a few addresses still intact.
As he turned back toward the ship, he gasped. The readings on his
data pad defied his imagination.

"Carson…I can't quite believe what I am seeing…Look at this!"

"What? What is that?" He asked, staring at the image in Rodney's
hands.

"What makes a hive special…Why is it called a hive?" He asked,
looking fearful.

"I don't know?...A hive is…A collective…A group…It has chambers?"

"Bingo! Look." Rodney pointed at the pattern displayed.

"That can't be?" Carson's confusion cleared. "We need to leave!"

"Yeah, look at the ground! This is too strange!" He activated his
head set."Sheppard! Fall back now! I have something!"

Sheppard and his team members met back within a few moments. He
entered the jumper, breathing quickly. "What have you got?"

"They were underground Sheppard! The Wraith, they were waiting
underground. Looks like a chamber for soldiers…Like a repository. I
think the villagers had absolutely no warning. Nothing came out of
the gate right away. They just came out of the ground and surrounded
them. The chambers ring the entire settlement."

Sheppard's face tightened with discomfort. "Son of a bitch! How
creepy is that?… They were just lying in wait?" Sheppard asked.

Rodney grimaced."Like a spider in a web. The settlement is fairly
recent. I don't know which came first, but I don't like the
development."

Teyla looked at Rodney from behind Sheppard. "Why would the Wraith go
to such lengths to trap their food source when they can just pick it
off the surface?"

Rodney raised his hand, pointing as he continued to study his data."I
don't know if it is about that…We are in a Wraith endemic area. Maybe
they were here when the settlement was established. Maybe it is some
sort of soldier growing facility. We know that their soldier `farms'
have been vulnerable to attack in the past when they have been found
on the surface. Something is not right. "

"But to be so well positioned…The soldiers would need a food source
when they emerged…That part makes sense…'Teyla added.

"Well, yeah…. And they had back up. Wraith darts were obviously here…
Look at the damage, but they definitely showed up late. "Rodney said,
looking at the devastated view out the window.

"Could it be the tactics of a Wraith faction? You know, out do the
other guy when competition is fierce?"Sheppard asked.

Rodney paused, considering the possibility."Good thought. The Wraith
have been struggling with finding enough to eat lately…So to speak."

"You said Zelenka thought there was something different about their
power supply?"Sheppard continued.

"He mentioned a carrier wave…It makes sense now…I think it was for a
signal…For pick up."He replied in chilled tone.

Sheppard assumed the pilot seat and powered up the ship."Got an
address?"

" Yes. The most probable one is in the next system."

Sheppard waited for everyone to find a seat then began his ascent.
He looked over at Rodney; the troubled expression on his face cut to
the heart of the matter. Rodney was tormenting himself. Sheppard
could relate to the pain of having a friend snatched away by the
enemy. This wasn't the first time. He quietly offered reassurance.

"Rodney, we will get him back. He won't be left behind. You have my
promise, just stay focused. Ok buddy?"

Rodney turned to him slowly and nodded. He was grateful Sheppard was
with him.

A distant white sun watched over a large Jupiter like planet and
its three small moons. Their destination resided on the largest of
the three. It was shrouded in a habitable pale atmosphere that made
life possible.

The land folded over its self in ragged low canyons and mountains. A
wide lime green sea was captured between the rifting land masses.
Dense, low growing silver brush clung to the rusty soil, semi-frozen
with the turning of the seasonal axis.

The jumpers hung in orbit, assessing their situation.

"Do we have company?"Sheppard asked .

"Looks like one hive. Oh, and another smaller facility or ship…Hard
to tell. I am getting scattered life signs… Ah, I have human life
signs. They are inside that other area…Or ship…Or thing."

Sheppard smirked in discomfort. "Just one hive? How hard can it be?"
He mumbled. " Do they know we are here yet?"

"No, not that I can tell."

"How many life signs…Human life signs…?"Sheppard asked.

""Maybe twenty?"Rodney offered, trying to decipher his data. The data
pad kept flickering with interference.

"Crap! That's a lot more than the settlement had. I hope we can fit
them in the Jumpers…They must be from somewhere else. What if this is
like a depot?"

"That is a really unpleasant thought."Rodney said with a whisper.

"Sorry, but speaking of that…Any sign of those surprise underground
chambers?"Sheppard wrinkled his face.

"Can't tell….The hive is interfering with the scan."He sighed with
frustration.

"Zelenka's transponder?"

"Can't be sure…Too much interference."

Sheppard was looking for something that would be clear cut. "Alright,
do you think we can get close to that other thing, the small ship or
whatever?"

"Yes, shouldn't be a problem. The readings I am picking up... I don't
know …It looks like this camp out is not that recent…Like they have
been doing business for a while. Makes me nervous…We should be quick."

"That's the idea McKay." Sheppard moved the cloaked ship into the
atmosphere.

Rodney studied his readings…They bothered him. He leaned over and
whispered. " I don't have the best feeling about this John. What if I
am wrong? There could be more of those chambers."

Sheppard looked at him calmly."Then you're wrong and we fight our
way out. We don't have a choice. If we don't rescue them from this
place then we would have to deal with a hive and the whole hyperspace
thing. A much bigger problem. Time is critical and there are too many
lives at stake to back out. We will do what we always do…We will do
our best." The small craft set down.

"Please be careful." Rodney looked at him with concern.

"I will buddy. Watch my back."He said as he stood and patted Rodney
on the shoulder.

"You got it." Rodney turned back to his scan.

*******

Sheppard crept into the small camp, moving without a sound.
Wraith soldiers were scattered about but not too close to him. He saw
he had a chance. Following the shadows of the falling twilight, he
arrived behind a strange structure. It looked like a large cell like
unit with a membranous coating.

He checked his scanner. He read a large group of humans, alive and
standing inside. He pulled a large knife from his belt and began to
cut. The sinew like tendrils that ran through the matrix were tough,
making his efforts harder but he persisted. Within a few minutes, he
had carved an opening large enough for escape.

Zelenka rushed to him, followed by two dozen more. Sheppard
balked at the number but motioned to them anyway. He signaled them to
be quiet as he directed them out of the chamber and into the canyon
ahead. They fled quickly over the sandy soil, terrified but focused
as they obeyed the Colonel.

Once they were some distance away from the cell, his men guided them
toward the jumpers while Sheppard followed, watching their backs.
Teyla and Ronon sat up on each side of the canyon, keeping watch as
the jumpers were loading. They would load to capacity and then
some... Many of the survivors were injured and needed assistance;
Beckett swiftly began to organize them into each ship, remaining
silent and using only hand gestures. A cold rain started to fall,
making visibility more challenging.

Unharmed but dirty, Zelenka joined Rodney in Jumper one.

"Oh, thank you God!" Rodney blurted, stepping forward and hugging
his wayward friend. Zelenka bristled with surprise.

"It is alright Rodney, I am ok. The others, they survived, but we
need to leave quickly. I have learned something…Something serious…"

The sound of Wraith darts shattered the silence as they shot
over the two Ancient vessels. Before Sheppard could blink, a large
contingent of Wraith rose from the ground, coming between him and the
group ahead. They began to surround the last dozen people heading for
safety.

"Run! Get to the ships! Run!" Sheppard yelled as he opened fire on
the Wraith soldiers. As if one mind, they turned and ran after him
while the survivors began to escape.

Sheppard kept firing but few fell. What would normally stop them
seemed radically less effective. He began to run, hitting his
headset. "McKay! Get them in the jumpers! I have Wraith blocking
me... Over run!! Unaffected by weapons! I will draw them off! Get out
of here now!

Teyla and Ronon took aim and tried to cut down the numbers springing
from the ground but it was no use. More kept coming. They ran down
the cliffs toward Sheppard and raced over the rocky terrain,
straining to reach him. As they rounded the canyon wall they could
see Sheppard running, trying to double back but there were too many.
He was trapped near a cliff.

Rodney and Radek leapt to the rear hatch and helped the remaining
survivors come aboard. Weapons fire knocked the ship as the last two
ran up the gang plank.

Rodney defensively took aim out the hatch with his pistol as he
waited for his team mates. He hit his headset."Sheppard! We're ready!
Get back now! Sheppard! Come in Sheppard!" Only static fed back
through his earpiece as a Wraith soldier stumbled to the hatch.
Rodney fired four rounds, stopping him but not before he streaked the
ramp with bodily fluid. Rodney stepped back in disgust and
fear. "Sheppard! Do you read?" He signaled again in a panic.

Teyla and Ronon fired their weapons into the enemy mass, now several
dozen strong but again with little effect.

Sheppard could see them through the rain."Run! Go! Go Now! Leave Me!"
He screamed desperately, trying to keep the Wraith's attention; he
kept firing into them as he dodged among a scattering of boulders at
the cliff side.

The Wraith seemed to pour out of the landscape like ants. Teyla
grabbed Ronon and cried."We must go! There are too many!"

Ronon pulled his arm away and looked back to see Sheppard take a
stunner blast in the leg in mid sprint. He fell out of
view. "Sheppard! No!" He yelled out as he ran toward him, firing to
draw them away but they would not turn.

Immediately after, Ronon took a hit himself as the Wraith were now in
lethal proximity and in overwhelming numbers. He stumbled but shook
it off. Teyla helped him up as they bolted for the ship.
Once inside, Teyla closed the rear hatch; Rodney stood in
shock."Where's Sheppard?" He asked frantically.

Teyla moved to him, out of breath."Go Now! He has ordered it! There
are too many!"

Rodney tried to understand but stopped short."Like hell!" He sat back
and quickly initiated the jumper to lift off.

Jumper two was standing by above with the injured, waiting for an
order. Carson was sitting in the pilot seat, watching the sky. He saw
the darts coming and he wondered why Rodney was waiting.

"Go Carson! Get to the gate!" Rodney yelled through his com.

"But Rodney!" He countered.

"Do it! Go! I will be right behind you!"

Carson saw that his own ship was in trouble. Incoming fire just
missed the cockpit window. He took his cue and Jumper two sped off.

Cloaked, Jumper one hovered over the mass of Wraith below."He has to
be here!"

"What are you doing?"Zelenka cried.

"I am trying to find him!…We can use the ships weapons…Or something!
He's not there! He is, but he isn't! He is alive but I can't get a
fix!"

"Rodney! We must leave now! " Zelenka cried again. "It is the only
thing we can do right now!"

The little ship rocked to one side, taking fire from the first of
many inbound darts. "How can they see us?!"Rodney snapped.

"Rodney! Go! That is what I wanted to tell you!"

"Damn it! We can't leave!" Rodney yelled. He converted from cloak to
shields and kept scanning. They were beginning to take damage. He
lost weapons. The frightened passengers huddled together, pressed
tight in the small space.

"We must!" Zelenka grabbed him by the arm.

"Rodney! Please!"Teyla cried out.

Rodney lost Sheppard's signal. The HUD flashed the damage report. He
had no choice. His heart pounded with bitterness and panic as he
raced to the gate, leaving his friend behind.

*******

Sheppard's nails raked desperately into the fragile soil,
straining for a hold of any kind as it gave way; he was falling fast.
His clothing haphazardly caught on the splintered rock face, jerking
him over small precipices in a flurry of gravel and debris that
choked him as he frantically tried to breathe in. `No! I can't!'

Searing pain exploded in his fingertips as he clawed, his fear
pushing out with every attempt. His hands burnished raw with blood as
the friction tore through his last attempt to grasp something. There
was nothing to reach for as the sand stone crumbled under his touch.
The wet air compressed around him, collapsing his vision as he looked
skyward in terror. `No! ' An imagined scream was lost to the rain as
the planet raced up.

The frigid impact shattered his consciousness, forcing him from his
body in a flash of darkness.

*******

Water roared in the pre dawn distance, echoing among the
boulders in the canyon as it spilled toward the alien sea in a wide
arc. The river had carried him far beyond his entry point.
He had come to rest in a sheltered stone cove just before the channel
made its way to the breakers a few hundred meters out. The cove
rested quietly under a veil of fog, stagnant from the receding tide.
The still water held him against the shore face down; his body nearly
submerged as the water lapped at his helpless form.

Movement began tenuously. A swallow pinched hard in the back of his
throat; something was in the way. Salt laced the tip of his tongue,
strong and strangely bitter as he felt the blood tainted wet between
the corners of his lips that threatened to fill his mouth.

Sheppard coughed abruptly with a violent involuntary spasm; trading
one element for another as fluid drained away and cool air pushed in,
expanding his rib cage with a gasp. His boggy lungs ached with the
infiltration of oxygen that insistently vied for space. He gasped
repeatedly between spasms as he expelled the remaining water.

He rolled slightly onto his side to assist his breathing as he
opened his eyes. The light stung as he attempted to focus on the
texture of a large russet colored stone a foot away at the pebbled
waterline. It looked transparent in the weak, ethereal light.
Slow deep breathing brought blood to his head, warming him to his
awareness as his body began to burn heavy with cold. With a labored
groan he pushed onto his back and exhaled painfully.

He stared up into the gray and tried to make sense of his
surroundings from his limited viewpoint; the misty ceiling above
blended into him, leaving him feeling confused as if he was dreaming.
Searching for something more relevant, he slowly held his shaky hands
up to his face. Flickers of memory began play in his mind as his eyes
studied them.

`Running…I was running…' He thought.

He noticed the torn skin on his seemingly alien palms and fingertips.
The wounds were now feather edged and bleached pale from being in the
water too long. `I fell?'

His head began to pulse with pain. He touched his numb fingers to
his scalp in a need for explanation; they came away wet with
crimson. "I'm hurt…" He mumbled quietly.

His tongue slipped out and cautiously ran over his lips. Traces of
blood and grit coated their smooth surface now tingling from being
disturbed. His black uniform twisted across him in a soaking embrace,
mimicking his awkward pose among the rocks.

"Still alive…" He heard himself say. "Where? …We…Running?…Head hurts…"
Being back in his body seemed to be a disadvantage in the moment. He
lifted his head to look around but quickly set it back as the pain
burst behind his eyes, momentarily blinding him.

Eyes closed and teeth clenched he clumsily felt his TAC vest for
anything useful. He pulled a wet field dressing out and blindly
wrapped it around his head and over his wound as if he had done so a
hundred times before. The simple effort winded him but the added
pressure of the bandage felt comforting, easing the splitting
sensation that was making him nauseated. It didn't take long for him
to realize that staying still felt like a blessing.

In time, the delicate fog began to precipitate a light rain. He
watched it softly fall toward him in his semi-lucid state. Each drop
streaked down into his line of sight like a hypnotic silver thread.
It was soothing at first but soon intensified and triggered his fear;
he remembered the sky pulling away as he fell. He remembered the
twilight turning to black. A wave of vertigo washed over him and spun
the world around in a blur. He held onto the beach beneath him hoping
it would make a difference.

Sheppard remained still and disoriented for another hour, waiting
out his dizziness as the mist dissipated in the morning light. A
distant sun appeared small in the lilac sky like a perfect pearl as
it passed on a gentle but insufficient warmth to him. His clothing
was nearly dry by the time he decided he would risk trying to move
again.

He gave the order for his legs to come on line but they were
unresponsive. He lowered his hand down to his right thigh and pulled
at his pant leg. Dead weight met his efforts. He tried his left and
noticed his lower leg scraped over the shore at an odd angle. His leg
was broken but he couldn't feel it. `I'm dreaming… Really bad
dream….' He thought nervously. Fear began to back up in his throat.
He used his arms to adjust his hips, letting his leg fall back to its
previous position.

A tight panic pricked at his heart. `Have to move…Have to…' He
struggled to his side again but still could not command his legs. The
pain in his back and chest was now breaking through as he began to
shiver. `Need shelter. Need help…' He tried to connect again but
there was no response.

A quick and uncharacteristic giggle escaped him as he sardonically
realized his situation. `Crap! Can't die here…Here…Enemy territory…
Can't remember…Can't take chance…Hide…Must move…'

Crawling was his only option. He scanned the shoreline with squinted
eyes until he saw a modest overhang roughly ten meters away. The
sunlight caught inside, offering the idea of relief from the cold.
Turned on his side, he began to pull himself forward over the stony
bank as he balanced his broken leg on his solid one for support.

The overhang waited as he caught his breath and made one last push,
coming to an awkward rest beneath it. He lowered himself back down
onto the sand and closed his eyes to the pressure claiming his head.

The only sound came from the river as it passed by. He could feel the
rumble of the ocean well up from the ground as he held still; left to
contemplate his fate. He wasn't sure which was more urgent, the pull
of sleep or the monolith of pain that was now his body. Either way,
he wanted a way out.

Whispering softly, illusion and memory slipped out into the quiet as
he desperately fought to hold his thoughts. `John…John Sheppard…What
do I do? I'm dreaming…Wish I was…Don't know…Have to run… Remember…
Get home…Can't stop…So cold…Damn cold…' Sheppard's thoughts drifted
away as the frigid air accepted his submission and eased him into
unconsciousness.

*************************CHAPTER 2

Rodney was enraged to be brought back. Of all the times to
return, this was the worst. The mandatory IOA de-briefing at Cheyenne
mountain had come out of the blue. He knew it was the tip of a very
treacherous ice berg; an ice berg that had just ripped his belly
open. And they still wanted more. It was now bigger than the IOA. It
was now the military that was being blinded by political pressures.

He braced himself against the table top and looked down; his hands
were balled up into two white fists. Suspended in frantic thought, he
tried to comprehend his situation. He didn't want it to end like
this. He didn't want to turn and face his eager friend with the news.

"Rodney, come on man! Talk to me. You didn't come back here to just
stare at your hands. Please, Rodney. For God's sake, say something!"
Carson moved up behind him and placed his hand on Rodney's
back. "It's Ok. We are in this together. What happened? What did they
say?"

Rodney ran his hand haphazardly across his forehead and placed it
back on the table top. He fought his nausea and his feelings of
betrayal. Sarcasm corrupted his words.

"No Carson, it is so not `OK'. This entire thing is not OK, not fine,
not fucking great!"

Carson blinked a few times, taken off guard. "Rodney?"

Rodney paused, taking a deep breath. `This isn't Carson's fault. Get
a grip McKay!' He thought. His heart began to slow down, leaving him
to feel some resignation.

He glanced in Carson's direction; this time his voice took a
regretful tone. "Crap… I don't know what to say… They won't listen. I
think they made up their minds a long time ago. After everything we
have been through, they…Carson, they won't let us go!"

His words were terse, strangling his throat as they left him. His
shirt stuck uncomfortably to his skin; he was chilled with
perspiration and anxiety.

Carson held his fear back as he replied. "Rodney, they have too!
There's no other answer. They couldn't have made up their minds…They
don't know everything that happened! Hell, we don't!"

McKay continued to seethe; his anger slipped up once again breaking
the surface of his distracted facade. "Yeah, well that inconvenient
fact doesn't seem to matter! There's more Carson...They are thinking
of closing down the expedition. They are saying there will be a short
hearing but it looks like complete withdraw could follow… They are
going to leave him there! They call it an `unfortunate loss'! They
blame us Carson! "McKay cried. His words suffocated the air from the
room.

Carson sat down, his legs now unsteady by the revelation. "Christ!
That can't happen Rodney! We are the only ones who can change this!"
After a moment of dire consideration, Carson stood and joined Rodney
at the table. "We can't let this happen. We can't leave him for
dead." He whispered. His eyes were heavy with desperation.

Rodney took a deep breath, fighting the urge to raise his voice but
it was too late. "If Elizabeth was here…She would not stand for this!
No fucking way! She would carve them a new one so deep…" Tears rimmed
his distraught eyes.

"Rodney,calm down now. We will find a way. We need to think."
Carson could see Rodney was pushing himself too hard. His face was
crimson.

Rodney threw up his hands. "I know, but what are we gonna do? They
won't listen. I was in there for what, two fucking hours again,
laying it out after you did the same? You know what I got for my
efforts? A god damn guard at the door. He's out there right now,
guarding us like we are gonna walk the damn green mile! Please, if
you see a way out of this, fill me in Beckett because as of right
now, we are so very screwed!" McKay covered his mouth for a moment,
biting back his rage. He felt like he was going to black out.

"Breathe. Deep breath, come on." Carson whispered. Rodney followed
his instruction, relaxing a little.

"I can't live with myself Carson if I let John go like that…I just
can't. This is my fault!" Rodney whispered back in a weak voice.

"No it's not." Carson put his arm around him for a moment to calm
him. He pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes, straining
to concentrate."Damn it…There has to be something…Something we can do…
Rodney, what would Elizabeth do?" He slowly stepped away, eyes still
closed.

Rodney was confused."What? I…I don't know? I sure as hell wish she
was here. Such a horrible waste, that…" He drifted into the memory of
her.

"Rodney, think. What would she do? Other than John, you knew her
best."

Rodney stood a bit taller, considering the question.
"Well, she would...I...She would beat the bastards at their own game!
She would…Break a rule that needed to be broken? For him, at least."
He covered his eyes. He felt hopeless.

"For any of us Rodney. She knew the difference between politics and
what really mattered. So, let's break some rules. Following them
hasn't done a lick of good." Carson urged.

Rodney fell back to sarcasm. "Which one should we start with? We are
under armed guard. I am open to suggestions but the fact remains… We
are trapped here Carson! "McKay waved his hands as Carson mumbled
something over and over under his breath.

Holding a hand out to block Rodney's interruption, he kept mumbling,
getting louder with each repetition until his eyes snapped open.

"Carson! What are you going on about?! I am the one who has the
brilliant last minute ideas! If I don't have one…Carson? Don't tell
me you…" McKay's thought stumbled as he caught the implication in
Carson's body language.

Carson looked back at Rodney as he was formulating the thought, his
hand now reaching for his friend. "A number Rodney, I was trying to
remember a number! We have to risk it! We have to go back!" He
blurted as he grasped McKay by the shoulders; his eyes chilled blue
with his idea.

"Carson! What are you talking about? What is it? They are not going
to just let us walk out of here!"

"Aye, I know that! Do you have your phone on you?" Carson looked
frightened but determined.

"Yeah…I grabbed it before we left, but it's not like we have
reception or can just call home…What are you thinking?"He whispered
as he pulled out his phone from his trouser pocket. Swallowing hard,
he shot a glance at the door. Carson read his mind and slipped a
chair under the doorknob as if it would help.

"Well, I think it will travel just far enough…The plan involves being
sneaky and calling in a favor, but I think at this point, we couldn't
live with ourselves if we didn't do this." Carson looked at Rodney
nervously.

Rodney's face was red with irritation. "Carson! You got a plan or
what?"He barked.

"Yeah, I do…At least to get us back, then you can take it from there.
We need to be invited back…"

"Whatever! We have to find Sheppard!"

"Agreed. Do you know how to text?" Carson whispered.

"For God's sake! What am I, a turnip? Who are we texting!?"Rodney
growled.

Carson grinned. "Who else at SGC knows nearly everything there is
about everything and really annoys you?"

Rodney chewed on his lip for a moment then whined at the obvious
choice." Aw man, you don't mean Lee do you?"

"Aye, I had the pleasure of shall we say, helping him with a
little `health problem' when we were on the Daedalus. I check in on
him from time to time on his private cell phone. I happen to know
that he is here, as we speak. I am sure he will help us."

"What was the problem you helped…?"

"Can't say…Well… Only as a last resort in this case. Let's just say
it was personal and it gives us an advantage. Play nice now. Get in
touch with just how much you love the `World of War Craft'." He said
with a smirk.

Having a hope to focus on brought him back to Earth. "Bite me Carson.
What's the number? "Rodney grumbled as he wrestled with his phone.

Teyla found Ronon standing out at the water's edge by the mess
hall. It had been twelve hours since their return from the Wraith
inhabited moon but it felt like a week. Nothing seemed right and it
was hard to find anyone who hadn't heard that Sheppard was dead. That
was the official story.

There was an IOA representative crawling over the entire city looking
for information on what he called an `irresponsibly executed
mission.' Woolsey was trying to hold the city together in light of
the situation; everyone was angry that there would be no rescue.
That was the unofficial story. Teyla and Ronon were scheduled to be
interviewed shortly.

Ronon looked out at the sunset, unaffected by the frigid wind that
cut past him. The cold magenta sky was perfectly clear, save for two
silver moons suspended over the dark blue New Lantian sea. A thick
ring of prismatic ice crystals haloed each one foretelling a change
coming. She came up quietly and stood to face him.

"Hey, how are you?"

Ronon glowered at her question as he met her eyes. "Were not going to
settle for this are we, because I can't." He growled as he crossed
his arms over his chest. It looked like he was trying to hold himself
back.

Teyla frowned as she lowered her voice. "No we are not…I feel that he
is still alive. I would bet my life on it."

Ronon looked back out at the view. "So what are we gonna do? They
have been watching us you know. As if we had something to do with it.
As if we did something wrong."

"I know. John would be furious. We must go after him. We must go now.
I feel that he is still on the planet. He needs us Ronon. I think I
know of a way." She said softly.

Ronon looked around and saw someone coming."Then we should talk
somewhere else…Follow me."

"Happy to Ronon. Lead the way."

*******

He awoke to the sound of his own strained voice, calling out
from his dream, "Now!"

Heavy and dull like the surrounding stone, his mind fought to adjust
to his new circumstance. The sun's rays were now long gone, leaving
him to feel the fatigue of constantly shivering. He couldn't stop.
With just enough room to sit up, Sheppard fumbled painfully to right
himself. It took a few attempts.

He looked around at the dim surroundings, confused. His body ached as
he remembered how he had arrived at his current location. `River bank…
I fell. I'm alone…Hurt?' He felt for his radio and weapons but all
were lost. Pain held tight in his head and chest as he patted
himself down with care. His legs still ignored his commands.

Sheppard's raw hands eventually found his damaged leg. Hands unsteady
as his breathing, he slowly folded his pant leg up to his knee to
take a look. He unlaced his boot with near frozen fingers and removed
it along with his damp sock.

A burning sensation burst through his back and escaped him on the
exhale as his foot came free. He stopped sharply, hoping to outlast
it. It died down into a threatening low grade electrical charge that
hummed within. `Go slow John…Really slow…' He wiped his brow.

Venturing a glance back to his injury, he could see that the lateral
bone was broken just above the ankle. It had shifted under the
discolored skin, distorting his leg. "Not so good John." He mumbled
somewhat incoherently. `Gotta fix it.' He looked around, hoping for
something to help.

Tidal remnants of plant and stone were scattered about in caches
between the boulders that dotted the entrance to the overhang. He
found a length of drift wood to brace his leg and set it aside.
Noting that his side arm was missing, he removed his leg holster. He
had suffered many injuries over his military career including many
broken bones and had picked up a few tricks but setting his own leg
seemed daunting in his distorted state. He would start then stop,
forgetting what he was doing.

Eventually, he worked out his thought out and positioned the straps
from his holster under and perpendicular to his leg. He swallowed
tight as he placed his hands on his ankle. `Fast…Do it fast…'He
thought.

Staring at it with determination, he quickly jerked the bone back
into approximate alignment. His cry was loud and sharp as another
electrical shock flashed within, leaving him panting with eyes
clamped shut.

After a few moments to regain his composure, he picked up the length
of driftwood with trembling hands and placed it alongside the
traumatized bone. The soft holster served as a pad between the two as
he grudgingly strapped it together and pulled his sock over the
assembly. Sheppard blearily stared at his makeshift splint. "That has
to do…"He whispered.

With the dark soon to be all around him and no source of heat,
Sheppard instinctively gathered what wood and dried algae was lying
next to him and drunkenly made a mat to lie on to insulate him. Every
movement became painstaking as his shivering became more violent. He
lowered himself down and pulled his arms into his vest. `Need to stay
awake…Somehow…' He gazed out of his crevice and hoped for rescue.
As he looked out he noticed something moving on the ridge across from
him. Something in his memory told him they were the enemy. He had
never felt so vulnerable. They disappeared within minutes, but he
felt no comfort.

The wide open night sky above overwhelmed the landscape as he
studied the lights within it. Two galactic arms spanned the black,
dressed thick with a billion worlds that glowed with infinite
possibilities but none seemed imminent. He focused on counting his
way across, star by star, forcing his mind to remain engaged. `Long
way home Sheppard…Long way…' He thought, scared by the sight. `They
will come for me…Just stay awake.' He told himself.

*******

Dr. Lee paused, taking note of the guards as he flashed his pass
to them. With a nod and a slightly nervous smile, he knocked on the
door. It cracked open, revealing McKay peering at him with
bloodshot eyes.

Lee walked in and promptly closed the security door behind him.
" Ok, I'm here. What can I do?"He asked quietly.

"I need you to get a message to Pegasus ASAP. Sheppard's life depends
on it!"Rodney whispered.

"I thought…I mean…Well,yeah, it's just about time for our usual
transmission…I take it the brass won't let you do this through
conventional channels...I hear you're in some hot water."

Rodney's frustration snapped it's last twig at Lee's indifference. He
glared at him and spat in a vicious whisper. "Yeah! We are! And If I
know you, you have been eavesdropping on the entire situation!"

"Rodney!"Carson smacked his shoulder.

Lee blinked a few times, un-affected by Rodney's behavior. He had
seen it before."Well, yeah…You got me there…I thought the Col. didn't
make it. You really think he is alive?"

"That's kinda the point to this whole thing Einstein!" Rodney hissed
again.

Carson smacked him again and interjected."Forgive him, he is
suffering from that…Condition you… Well, you know."

Lee looked at him sideways, wondering if his secret was safe. Carson
winked at him, letting him know it was. For now. Lee tried to act
casual. "Yeah, heard about that condition. That would make anyone
irritable. Sorry to hear that McKay. So, what do you need me to do
again?"

Rodney felt Carson's finger digging into his rib, insisting on some
level of politeness. He grudgingly abided. " We need to get a message
to Zelenka on Atlantis. Just a few lines of text with programming
language…I didn't want to send them to you over the phone…Just in
case. Here, memorize it." He handed Lee a small scrap of paper.

Lee studied it for a moment. "Strange..I get it…Ok, but what about
you guys? What are they gonna do with you…Do you know yet?"

McKay wanted to scream at him but Carson's finger was pressing on a
nerve, making it hard to breathe. "No. Just send it. If Zelenka sends
something back, find us, OK?" He said, squelching a cry of pain.
Lee handed the paper back.

"Ok. For Sheppard. But you never saw me." He slipped out of the room.

*******-

Ronon stepped out into the empty hall by the armory, stopping
Mr. Woolsey in his tracks. Teyla appeared right after, coming up
behind them.

"Ah, Hello Ronon…Teyla, what can I do for you?" He asked nervously,
realizing he was engulfed in Ronon's shadow.

"I think you know what you can do for me…Or should I say Sheppard."
He said in an intimidating tone.

"Ronon, we have been over this. The IOA has declared him KIA. They
have locked down the gate. No expedition member may leave. I know
this is hard to accept, but for right now, I must agree with them. I
can't see how he would have survived. Not based on the information we
have. It is far too dangerous to risk anyone else. I'm sorry."

"We don't know that and you don't know him! He doesn't deserve this!"
He spat through his teeth as he took a step forward.

Woolsey took a step back."Ronon, it isn't about what he deserves. It
is about how dangerous it is. The IOA feels that there has been
enough loss. I am sorry."

"Excuse me Mr. Woolsey, but you said that any expedition member
cannot leave at this time. It that what the IOA has stated?"Teyla
calmly asked.

"Yes. That is the official wording."He blinked a few times, wondering
what they were going to do.

"Then may I offer that Ronon and I are not members of the expedition
from Earth. Rather, we are alien allies that have chosen to assist
the Colonel in an alliance, if you will. Therefore, in light of the
circumstances, we should return to our home world until you have set
your affairs in order." She looked at him with an insistence that was
forged harder than steel.

A light went on behind his eyes. "Mmm. Very interesting. I hear what
you are saying. I don't suppose that if you return to your home
world, you would resist the urge to gate to his last known location?"

"I cannot say Mr. Woolsey."Teyla held his gaze. It made him
uncomfortable.

"I see. You know that we would not be able to communicate during the
lock down?"

"Yes."

"But you would want to `return home' all the same?" He folded his
arms over himself, wanting protection from Ronon's relentless stare.

"Yes, we would. We will give you an address. I do not think the IOA
would need to be concerned with such a thing. After all, we have not
been introduced."

"True, the IOA representative does not know you. Not yet. Your
introductions are not scheduled for a few hours." His concern broke
through his strained diplomacy. "Teyla, I do not want to see you
harmed."

Ronon tightened his jaw. "We will be fine. Are you going to let us go
or not?"

Woolsey looked around, making sure they were still alone. "I don't
know if…How am I going to introduce you when you are not here? He
wants to question you."He lowered his tone, attempting to keep the
conversation just between them.

"I am sure you will find a way. You are an intelligent man who can
handle situations much more challenging than this."She smiled
politely.

He tried to take a more authoritative stance but Ronon's presence
was really starting to affect him. He was beginning to unravel. "I
suppose…I can't recommend that this is a good idea. I know you are
fiercely loyal to Sheppard, but …"

Teyla stepped forward, surprising him with her steadfast
negotiation. "I do not think you understand just how loyal we are,
Mr. Woolsey."

He paused, considering the situation. He paused too long for Ronon's
growled. "Or how fierce…I would hate to see our
alliance destroyed by an act of war."

"Ronon…I" Woolsey tried to diffuse the situation but he stopped
before he began. He knew he was losing and he did not trust Ronon at
this point to continue to show restraint. His only option was to call
for help or accept.

"I would have to agree, Mr. Woolsey. Preserve our alliance. Let us
go. Please."Teyla urged.

Woolsey swallowed. "Alright. I see your point. I think it is
honorable you want to try, but foolish…"He began.

"And what would you know about honor?"Ronon asked with a hint of
disgust.

Teyla took another step towards him and looked deep into his
eyes."What he means to say, is that you would honor us by granting
our request."

"Very well." Woolsey whispered with surrender. "Meet me in the gate
room in ten minutes."

Teyla nodded and watched him walk away.

"Should we trust him?" Ronon asked.

"Yes. How will you get a jumper?" She kept watching, making sure he
was out of sight.

"Lorne. Leave that to me."Ronon replied.

"How will you gate out without being detected?"

"Leave that to Zelenka. And Teyla?"

"Yes?"

"I will come for you."

"I trust you will. We should let Radek know we are ready." She said.
Ronon nodded.

They turned and walked toward the science lab.

*******

The sound wavered in and out of his consciousness, puncturing
his blunted sleep with an instinctive unease. The deep hiss became
more menacing in his ear as he fought to open his eyes. Sheppard felt
something strange. A warm, wet sensation tingled across his shoulder
thickening into a burn that took his breath as he was viciously
thrown into the rear of the shallow cave.

The caustic pain was instantaneous as the suffocating shadow over
him lunged again, crushing its jaws into his collar bone as he hit
out frantically. The force of the stone grating into his back made
him yell out as he landed. Blood shot from his mouth as his face made
contact.

The hissing figure bit down again, ripping his stinging flesh as it
pulled him by the shoulder out into the starlight. As it drug him
over the shore, his legs caught randomly on the rubble while his free
hand fell to a fist sized shard of rock. Sheppard latched on and held
tight to it with numb fingers; he swung his arm forward in
desperation with all his strength. It came to a stop with a sickening
crack.

A heavy sensation spread over his chest as the shadow moved off with
a hollow gurgle, leaving him at the river's edge gasping for air in
the icy mist.

It took the better part of a half hour for him to crawl back to his
small shelter. Every motion felt impossible through his warped
awareness as his upper body sacrificed its strength to cover the
distance; survival and delusion urged him on.

He collapsed onto his side and trembled uncontrollably as the burning
sensation seemed to taint his entire body with a bone breaking ache.
He strained to focus. He had lost a considerable amount of blood and
the wound kept oozing. `Have to…Stop it…'

Sheppard blindly felt the sand for anything to stop the flow. He
clutched a large pile of desiccated algae and pressed it into his
shoulder. With the last remnant of his strength was gone, he fell
back onto the sand, grateful for gravity's assistance. St…tay…Awake…
John…nn.' He whispered.

*******

Teyla arrived just after dawn, undetected as she stepped
through the ancient portal. Hunched low, she scurried for cover among
the trees still bathed in the breath of the night before. The air was
fragile and cold, much like the impotent sun that only hinted at
warmth. She pulled her heavy coat tight and took a moment to gather
her bearings.

Her scanner hinted at a direction, sensing Sheppard's transmiter. It
would be a long trek through a Wraith inhabited valley and over a
steep ridge to the east. Her instincts told her to be particularly
wary; she was about to have company. A hive ship was due to land
soon.

Escaping this world the first time had been difficult . She doubted
the Wraith would be tricked again. She checked her weapons and
slipped into the wilderness in search of him.

*******

The evening transmission from SGC would be the only activity the
gate would see for a while. Zelenka watched his computer monitor
hungrily for any status update pertaining to his friends. Most of the
content was for Woolsey's eyes only, save for a few shipping
manifests and random memos.

Within moments, the transmission ended and the gate flashed closed.
He studied the contents from tip to tail. A small cluster of notation
caught his eye. It was embedded in a line of text and routine code
that finished the last paragraph.

"RMRZ"

It was something that was inescapable on Atlantis…At least in the
science labs. He once even found it written out in the frosting of a
chocolate éclair he had hoped to eat one morning.

Zelenka looked casually around and saw he was momentarily un-
observed. Woolsey was in his office, yelling at someone from the IOA.
He began to sweat as he clicked on it. A password box opened up,
prompting him.

He entered the phrase 'RODNEY- MCKAY- IS- GREATER-
THAN –RADEK- ZELENKA'.

"Bastard!" He whispered under his breath as he waited.

Although they often argued, Rodney and Radek held a deep respect for
one another. They would speak in code even for the silliest things,
just for fun. Every letter had a meaning, every phrase a potential
directive. This was one of the few times that their unspoken language
would serve a more important purpose.

Another box appeared with a response. It held lines of code:

0001X11C0010R100IT0X01IC0010A00LX00S0011X00H101E010P0X0000I001X1S00L00
11XI11V001E
G010E0X011T00M0X0E010R01X0E110D00I101T010H00H0X01O0X10M001E000010N11X1
01O11011XW110

He eliminated the ones, X's and zeros. Then he saw it:

` CRITICAL SHEP IS LIVE GET MEREDITH HOME NOW `

At the bottom was yet another small box, waiting for an entry. He
typed `REVEAL' and hit enter . Seconds seemed like hours, but the
last clue appeared.

GATE EMERGENCY TACTIC NAQUADAH OVERLOAD WINDOW

Zelenka deleted any sign of the message and hurried off to his lab.
He had his answer. It was time to take action.

*******

After a few hours, Teyla arrived at a large river. She moved
quietly over the tumbled shoreline like a cat, observing every tidal
mark that shaped the sand. As she walked, she replayed John's
disappearance in her mind. She could see the swarm of Wraith heading
for him. She remembered how he fought. The image of Wraith rising up
from the ground terrified her. She could not sense them at the
moment. For now, the area was clear.

The sun was sinking behind the wall of the canyon, softening the
feeble sunlight into a ruddy tone. Each exhale was visible in the
cold as she persisted in her stride, scanning the tiniest detail.
Then as if tricked, her eyes fought to believe…She saw it...

Just a few inches below the surface of the frigid aquamarine river
she noticed a glint. Reaching down, her hand broke the surface and
felt the familiar grip of a nine millimeter side arm. It was John's.
Her heart burst in her chest as she stood staring at its angular form
resting in her wet palm.

Eyes wide, she eagerly combed the surrounding area, questioning every
contour of the land that stretched out before her. Every shadow held
urgency, every boulder a hidden possibility. She wanted to call out,
but feared her voice would carry too far to the ears of the enemy so
she moved on slowly, cautiously approaching a large outcrop of stone.

Her eyes came to rest on a wide band of disturbed sand just above the
waterline. It meandered across the bank and toward the cliff face. A
blackened slick substance spattered the shore, leading upstream in a
trickle. She touched it. It was viscous on her finger and rancid like
old flesh.

A few meters up the beach the carcass of a large lizard like
creature had begun to rot; its scales almost midnight and reflective
like a dark mirror. The animal's flat skull had been crushed in at
the base. Teyla had seen them before in her travels. They were
familiar scavengers on the Wraith worlds favored for their ability to
clean up any human waste left behind. This one had fought for a meal
and lost.

Returning her attention to the cliff she silently moved closer; her
breath now held tight between her lips. A few pools of rusting blood
were held among the debris as she followed the trail.

Barely visible in the shadows of a small cave, John's rigid body
appeared still before her. He rested on his side, turned away. She
noticed he was far too still as she knelt down, touching him with a
timid hand.

"John! John?" She whispered. Her hand fell upon his back; the first
sensation was the damp that clung to his black uniform. She pressed
in further to feel for more. His body was cold as it met her finger
tips.

Dread choked her, slurring her movements. `No John…No…' Her heart
fell. A crushing weight descended upon her spirit as she bowed her
head.

Teyla gently turned him over onto his back and softly wiped the sand
from his ashen face. His eyes were slightly open and stagnant. She
gently closed them.

Remnants of dried blood snaked from just above his ear down the
hollow of his cheek and covered most of his chest. His mouth was
crusted red at the corners. She could feel her chest spasm with grief
at the sight.

He remained seemingly lifeless and broken before her as she took a
deep breath in and held it. His chest did not move. Holding his
wrist, she was unable to feel a pulse.

Sorrow welled up within her as a small sob broke free. "`No John, not
like this…Not like this."She whispered.

John Sheppard was more to her than a team leader or warrior. He was
family. He was her friend. He was a savior and a guide. He was so
many things that had come to surprise her. The thought of his loss
seemed more personal than could be spoken. It was devastating. She
found herself fighting back tears as she observed his surrendered
state. Time seemed to stop.

Moving her hands over him like a ghost, she found every injury and
watched for any sign of response. His body was chilled and foreign
under her touch as she attempted to read his story.

Holding his icy hand open, she examined his ragged palm. Its squared
form was strong with details of a life of service but was now thick
with trauma from the last few days. She realized how he came to be
lost. `I am too late my friend…'

She wiped her face and took another deep breath. "I am here John."Her
warm words echoed against the stone backdrop as her tears slipped
from her cheek, falling onto his own.

Cradling his head with great care, she solemnly placed her forehead
to his and paused, as if to say goodbye. Before she could whisper the
words, she felt his fragile, inconsistent breath on her skin.

Hope overwhelmed her. "John! John, its Teyla! I am here! John?
Please John, can you hear me?" Her hands ran over his face again,
frantic for a sign he was still with her. He remained unresponsive
yet his faint breath whispered out. He felt colder to her touch than
the air around them.

She quickly began to remove the damp clothing from his torso,
stripping him bare. She removed her long fur lined coat and carefully
draped it over him for warmth. "John…John Sheppard…Can you hear me?"
"I am not letting you go John…Stay with me." She whispered as she
barred her own chest and joined him under the coat, wrapping herself
around him.

His body felt lifeless and empty in her arms at first, as if his
soul was standing outside of its vessel. The chill of his bare skin
on hers felt sharp and painful. It made her shiver. "I am going to
get you home." She whispered into his ear.

She desperately wanted to start a fire, but the risk of giving away
their location was too great. The Wraith were closer now and on the
hunt for any escapees from their holding yard. Teyla decided body
heat would have to do. "John, Its Teyla, I am here with you." Teyla
held tight, trying to impart as much warmth as possible.

After a few hours, his body began to give off its own modest
heat. "John, can you hear me?" She patiently asked. A tiny groan
slipped from his mouth.

Keeping him alive was the immediate challenge. If she could manage
it, how to get him home would be the next. Teyla could hear weapons
fire far off in the distance. The Wraith were numerous and
unrelenting in their search. She knew their only hope was to wait for
Ronon. Of more concern to her was if he would regain consciousness.
His wounds were serious, leaving him completely helpless at the
moment.

Realizing they would have to wait out the night, she concentrated on
keeping John protected. Every sound drew her attention as she tried
to imagine that they were invisible among the frost covered stone.
Tucked away under her leather coat, they appeared to be; blending
into the ocher hues of the riverbed. Holding to the hope of
Sheppard's survival, Teyla kept watch until dawn returned.

*******

Major Lorne stood alone as he signed his weapons into the
armory and neatly placed his gear back into his locker. He still
felt nauseated. He had been off world when Sheppard's team had been
intercepted. By the time he had returned, Atlantis had been ordered
into lockdown and he was held in an empty office for two hours.
Being grilled by the IOA representative had been infuriating.

He attempted to maintain his composure as he changed into a new
uniform but his anger welled up and out into his fist as he slammed
it into a supply crate.

"Damn it! He doesn't deserve that!" He yelled. The pain
shot to his brain as he caught his breath. "Arrrghah!" He bent over
slightly, consoling his hand.

Ronon stepped out from behind a freestanding locker, startling
him. "No, he doesn't deserve that." He said in a menacing tone. Lorne
jumped back.

"Shit, Ronon, how long have you been here?"

"A while. Just seeing who I can trust. How did it go with the IOA?"
He leaned against the locker and folded his arms. Lorne stepped
closer.

"Bastards! I can't believe, after everything Sheppard has done, they
just want to say he's KIA! We don't know that! I wish I had been
there! They won't tell me where he was last seen! They won't tell me
shit! Why did they even bother to talk to me? I won't believe he is
KIA until…" He blurted, arms waiving.

Ronon cut him off. "They questioned you because they want to get into
his head. They want to blame someone. You want to do something about
it?"

Lorne stared back at him. "Well, yeah, but how?"

"I will need your help. And don't worry. You won't be responsible.
Interested?" Ronon approached him.

"Ah…Yeah. What are you thinking exactly?"

"Well, actually, you have a head start on me, but I will need to hit
you. Maybe a few times. You OK with that?"

"What?" Lorne stared back at him again and blinked a few times.

"I take you down, abduct you against your will and steal a jumper
which you are gonna fly at gun point. Just to cover our asses. Or
your ass."

"Hit me how many times?" Lorne asked, wrinkling his face.

"Just enough to make it convincing."Ronon replied as he tried to
suppress a smile.

Lorne looked uncertain, but nodded. "Yeah, that clears it up…OK, but
go easy. I can't take your punch like Sheppard."

"Who says he can? By the way, good thing you said yes." His smile had
now slipped its restraint.

Lorne studied him thoughtfully. "Somehow, it seemed the right thing
to do. Do we need supplies? Weapons?"

"Already loaded. Jumper 1."

"What about the lock out. Who is gonna open the Iris?"

"Zelenka. He said something about a power fluctuation or something.
We got to give him a signal when we are ready."

"Ok, I'm in. Med kit in the jumper?"

"Yeah."Ronon smiled again.

"Great…Can I close my eyes?"

Before Lorne could think, Ronon clocked him quickly, knocking him
back and splitting his lip. Before he could breathe, Lorne was hit
again and thrown over Ronon's shoulder. His face started to bleed
down Ronon's back as they moved to the Jumper bay.

Lorne felt himself spinning slightly."Nice job, bleeding and
disoriented but not completely unconscious." Lorne whispered with a
bloody lisp.

"Thanks." Ronon whispered back as he drew his gun. The guards at the
bay door raised their weapons as he approached, clearly intimidated
by the sight of Ronon stalking toward them with their limp and beaten
commander.

"Move!" Ronon said forcefully.

"We can't let you…"

"You just did." He stunned both guards and entered the bay.

*******

Morning filtered through the canyons in a blue mist. The land
was under a shroud of bitter cold that was only destined to be beaten
back for a few hours by the remote star, now attempting to rise.

Teyla felt him shift under her ever so slightly as she lie draped
upon him like her coat. The color had returned to his face somewhat.
She rested her hand on his bare chest and felt his heart beating back
to her with a stronger voice. He was now warm to the touch.

Teyla had cleaned him and covered his torn shoulder during the
night. She was relieved he showed no signs of fever.

Sheppard slowly opened his eyes half way and stared weakly at the
rock above him. He stayed still, not quiet present in the moment.
Teyla moved out from under the coat and discretely pulled on her tank
top before moving into his line of sight. "John, can you hear me?"
She touched his face.

Sheppard felt the warmth of her hands on him. With great effort, his
grey eyes focused on her form. "John, can you speak?" She asked,
again caressing his bruised face. His eyelids fought to stay open as
he listened to her voice roll over him.

"Tey..la?" He whispered faintly. He licked his lips, now blushed back
into life.

"Yes John. I am here." She tucked the coat around him to keep the
chill out.

"Where?" He asked; his voice as pale as his skin.

"You are on a Wraith world. We are waiting for rescue. You are
injured John."

His eyes seemed slightly vacant. Teyla held them with her own,
imparting strength and comfort as she spoke.

"You were lost on a mission. You became separated from the team and
fell I think, off a cliff. I believe the river carried you quite a
distance away. We came back for you." She could see the news
register on his beleaguered face.

"Wraith?"

"They have moved off for now but I believe they are still an imminent
threat. There is a hive in the next valley. I feel another is soon to
join it. Ronon is coming for us. He will be here soon."

Her words seemed to make sense but he felt unable to connect them
all just yet.

"Pain. " He groaned weakly.

Teyla caressed his face again, relieved to see him looking back at
her, although dazed. The weak morning light painted his eyes violet
for a few moments as he looked to her for clues.

"John, what do you remember?"

He swallowed hard, trying to lubricate his throat."Wraith." He fell
silent for a moment as the throbbing in his head intensified. "You
found me?"

"Yes, I tracked you, or I should say your most probable location. How
do you feel John?" Teyla's concern was so overwhelming, she found it
difficult to keep from touching him. She adjusted the coat once more.

"Thirsty." John looked at her carefully, appreciating her presence.
She uncapped her canteen and helped him sip from the opening, gently
holding his head up. He labored to swallow a few
mouthfuls.
"Something… Attacked me." He added. A trickle of water
escaped the corner of his mouth only to be caught as she wiped it
away.

"Attacked you? Here?" She asked, lightly touching his wrapped
shoulder.

"Yeah, burns. Fought it off."

Teyla found herself feeling admiration for the man before her. "Yes,
you did. It will not be returning." She set the canteen aside and
held her hand to his cheek."It was not venomous but we will have to
watch you for any infection. I feel no fever yet. That is good." She
said quietly."Can you move?"

"Don't know." He replied. She could see that he wanted to test the
theory.

"John, I don't think you should." She cautioned.

"Help me." He asked. "Please."

She looked at him with uncertainty. "If you must, move very slowly."
He nodded slightly in acknowledgement.

Sheppard began with his hands, feeling his way over his chest and up
to his face. He reached up and fingered the bandage on his head.

"Does it hurt?"She asked.

"Yeah…My eyes are funny…" He tried to turn on his side and shook
with the effort. Teyla caught him as his injured shoulder buckled in
pain. He gasped as she eased him back down.

"You are not ready. We will wait a little. It's alright."

He looked up at her with a frightened expression.

"John?...What is it?" She leaned toward him, feeling his fear. "John?
Talk to me John, please."

He stared outside for a moment, searching for a response. He
stuttered as he attempted to speak again; his voice soft as if he had
run out of air. "I…I…Teyla…I can't move…My legs… They won't move…" He
was struggling to hold in his panic.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. Can't feel them." The distress in his eyes confirmed his words.

"John, can I take a look?"

He nodded, still stunned by his realization. She started by
delicately slipping her hand under his back. She moved her fingers
along his mid spine, tentatively and selectively reading every inch.
She could feel the heat from the bruises that mottled his skin. It
felt as if he had hit every rock in the river. "Can you feel me?" She
asked as she paused.

"Yeah. It hurts."He said with a wince.

She continued gingerly down to his low back. She could feel the
swelling along his spine. She paused just below it."Here?"

"No." He swallowed and tried to look away. He did not react to her
touch.

Aware of this, she moved down the back of each thigh, giving
him a hard pinch on both. Again, there was no response. She ran her
hands over the length of both legs and gave his braced leg a shake.
He did not move.

"Anything?"

"No." He whispered in defeat.

Her hands moved back up to the outside of his hips. "Here?"

"I don't know…Maybe. Kinda numb." His words faded out.

Teyla covered him again. He looked up without speaking, paler than
before. She took his hand into hers. "John, we will get help."She
said kindly.

He felt guilty she had found him. He was a danger to her now. A
liability. He remained silent but she felt his regret.

"John, we will do this together. We will endure."

Looking back to her slowly, he gave a brief but insincere nod.

She could see he was starting to shiver again. "You need to stay
warm." She slipped under the coat with him and generously placed
herself against his bare torso again. She entwined her legs to hold
his.

"What are you doing?" He asked quietly, slightly incoherent and
confused by her actions. He realized he was not fully clothed and
braced against her. He had little choice as she looked him in the eye.

"You are weak and must stay warm John. This is the only way right
now. Trust me." She rested her head against him. He remained quiet,
not knowing what it meant.

The far off sun barely grazed the riverbed as it climbed. Teyla held
him like a bird in her hand; insistent of his safety, but gently,
allowing him movement. He eventually relaxed and fell into a light
sleep. She watched the morning light seep among the surrounding
stones, melting away the shadows but not the frost.

*******

Sheppard awoke wearily a short time later with a high pitched
groan. Teyla sat up. He was in distress.

"Turn me." He breathed.

Without hesitation, she complied. She turned his body, keeping his
spine straight as he vomited out of reflex. His belly contracted
repeatedly, expelling nothing but effort. It left him weaker than
before. She moved him back and wiped his mouth. He looked at her with
shame tainted eyes, frustrated by the lack of control his body was
experiencing.

"It is alright. I have you." She said, un-phased as she gave him some
water to soothe his throat. He swallowed abruptly, nearly
choking. "Easy, sip it from the edge." She whispered.

He tried again following her instruction. It was much easier. Sip by
sip he held the cold water in his mouth before letting it slip down
in small swallows.

He rested quietly for a bit, still attempting to make sense of his
reality as Teyla slowly moved her hand over his arm in a reassuring
way. It mesmerized him, allowing him to let some of his pain go for a
few moments. He drifted in and out of his reality until images
filtered back to his mind, begging for answers. He searched for his
voice.

"Teyla, I remember something." He whispered.

"Yes John?"

"I remember…The rain. It was raining. I tried to hold on. "His throat
was dry from dehydration.

"Yes, it has been raining off and on these last few days. I think
you fell as you were leading the Wraith away from the jumper. You
fell a long way, into the river. It broke your fall."

"Leading them away?" He coughed.

"Yes, we were departing when they caught us off guard. You yelled out
to draw them off. They went after you. There were many."She
held a little tighter to him.

"You were with me?"

"Yes John, I was a part of your team."

"Team?" He whispered fearfully. Teyla could feel the emptiness behind
his question. He sounded lost.

"They made it out. You made it possible."

He closed his eyes for a moment and tried to remember. His memories
remained scattered, just out of reach. He could see the jumper…People
running toward it….With a frustrated exhale he turned his head
slightly toward her.

"Rescue? When?" He asked, his tone now more uncertain.

"Soon John. Ronon is working on that. He knows where I have gone. We
tracked your transmitter at first." Teyla felt her own uncertainty
well up. She tried to hide it.

"Daedalus?"

"No. We will have to go through a space gate with a jumper. We came
against orders."

"What?" He gave a small moan. She could feel his body tighten with
pain.

"The IOA John…They would not authorize a rescue. They said it was too
dangerous. Ronon and I came for you."

John's stomach clenched."McKay?"

"Rodney and Carson were taken back to Earth. The IOA insisted they be
debriefed there. They went against their will. I have not heard from
them."

"Jumper?"He began to lose his words.

"Major Lorne. Ronon and Lorne are working on it."

"Lorne? Military won't accept… His actions…" The pain in his head
expanded, causing his left eye to dim.

"Ronon said he knew of a way. Don't worry."

Silence fell for a while longer as John attempted to understand
their plan but the pieces kept slipping away. His head felt worse.
His vision was now fading in and out. He tried to feel his legs
again, but felt only numbness lingering in his hips. He was afraid.
He couldn't remember what they had been talking about. He forgot her
name for a moment.

"Te…Teyla…Why did we come here?"

"We came to recover survivors from a raid. Human survivors that were
our allies and one of our own."

"One of us?"
"They took Dr. Zelenka. He was tending to their power supply in a
neighboring system when the Wraith arrived. He was captured and
brought here. He is alright and back on Atlantis because of you."

He moved his hand to his head and placed it over his eyes.

"When we returned, an IOA representative was on Atlantis and ordered
Woolsey to lock down the city. They deemed that the end of the
matter."

"He left me?" Disbelief tainted his voice.

"Yes, he thought that you could not have survived. He did manage to
do one thing positive."

"What?"

" He let us go look for you if. Ronon was very persuasive. He could
not give the order officially at the time. The IOA representative had
just arrived and only knew we were alien. He did not know we were a
part of your team. He saw no reason to block us. Woolsey told him
that we were visiting for a trade negotiation and needed to return to
our home world. "

John felt a wash of pain blot out his vision. He closed his eyes,
hoping it would stop. Nausea gripped him again. He tried to slow his
breathing to keep from retching.

Teyla had fit herself perfectly against him, locking in their heat.
He was grateful but still felt awkward. She felt his pause as his
heart rate increased.

He moved his hand from his eyes to her; eager for heat but fearful
of outright holding her. He didn't know quite what to do but he
couldn't deny how good it felt to be warmer.

" You knew... I was alive?"

"I felt it. I know you. Ronon knows you. Although, when I found you,
I thought otherwise. You were so cold John. You would have died from
the cold." She whispered. Her admission tightened his gut. He gave in
and held onto her.

"I could not leave you."She whispered.

"Teyla…It `s so dangerous. They were right to leave me if…"

"John, you know I can feel the Wraith. I can move among them. I was
the only one who could find you."

The nausea began to crest. She felt his belly tighten, resisting the
urge to vomit. She turned him and held his head as struggled against
the spasms. A cold sweat broke over his body as he waited out the
feeling. Teyla wiped his face and eased him back.

"Don't speak, it is making it worse John. Rest."

"And if Ronon can't come?" He whispered weakly.

"He will John. I know he will." Teyla could see that John was
blinking out. "Rest John. It is alright."

His fear was close to the surface. He was fearful for himself and
her. "Teyla…I, I'm in real trouble. If help doesn't come…" His voice
faded out as he lost consciousness.

Teyla was thankful he did not finish his thought. She knew he wanted
to protect her, even now. Not trusting his altered state and his
feeling of being a burden, she did not want him to hurt himself if
rescue was delayed.

She reached out her hand from under the coat and felt for his side
arm lying nearby. In one swift movement she placed it away behind a
large standing stone, out of sight and away from him. She left her
own stunner by her side.

"Sleep John, I will wake you in a little while." She whispered as she
pulled him closer and focused on his heart beat.