HUD: Literally the closest thing I'll ever get to crack. I recommend listening to Crocodile Rock by Elton John while reading this; you'll get the best effect that way.
"Me an' Suzie had so much fun -" There was a pause, the sudden void of the rich baritone deafening. "That's you, ya know."
Kakashi's stage whisper made Iruka snort. "You're joking." His eyes flashed to his partner in the passenger seat. "Oh no, you aren't."
Kakashi's answering grin made Iruka want to drive into oncoming traffic. "You shouldn't be - she leaves him in the end."
Kakashi's singing dropped to a hum. "I meant the good part."
"The good part?"
"Yeah - when Suzie wore her dresses tight -" (The fact that Kakashi lined his dialogue up with the lyrics was not lost on Iruka, oh no). "- that part. Makes me think of those briefs."
"Ugh."
"The dark blue ones, you know?"
"Stop."
"With the little black pinstripes - "
Iruka thumped his head against the driver window. "No amount of begging will make you stop, ever."
"You love - oh, here's my favourite part!" Kakashi grinned and tossed his head back slightly, his jaw dropping open to unleash the most unholiest of screeching Iruka had ever heard. He very nearly did drive into oncoming traffic.
"What the fuck?!" He demanded, turning wild and wide eyes on his grinning fiancé. He knew, after years and years and years of dating before Kakashi proposed, that the man was a bit of an unorthodox (Read: batshit) genius (Read: mental patient) who loved manipulating Iruka's radio during long car rides. Said psychopath just grinned ear to ear, the scar over his left cheek stretching adorably and the dark mole under his lip twitching. Iruka cursed - at least Kakashi was pretty and could sing pretty well, too.
"It's my favourite part." So nonchalant, as if it held the answer to the universe.
"And that gives you the right to screech like seagulls after a fish?!"
"Well, yeah," Kakashi answered. Obviously. His eyes lit up as the song progressed, his fingers resting on the dial. "Listen - I'm pretty spot on."
And lo and behold, as Kakashi was named thus, his genius showed. Elton John's usually pleasant tenor unleashed a too high pitch that was nearly comical. Kakashi couldn't seem to resist and joined in on the last part.
Iruka blinked. The edge of that bridge was looking pretty appealing.
He endured, as those did out of nothing but sheer love, until the end of Kakashi's favourite tune. The man sighed as he regained his breath and the next song played. It was more to Iruka's liking - not on the 'only your dogs can hear you now, Kakashi' side.
"You done?" He asked, eyeing the pale man beside him. Kakashi turned his mismatched eyes Iruka's way and grinned.
"Oh yeah."
"Enjoyed yourself?"
"Mmhmm."
"Peachy."
A silence settled, the radio blissfully tame.
"Love?"
"Hmm?" Iruka answered, mood finally manageable.
"Oh Lawdy mama those Friday nights!"
At least Kakashi's lovely voice drowned out the sounds of horns as Iruka jerked the wheel in surprise. Murder/suicide was sounding more appealing than wedding vows.
A/N: I have no regrets.