"It's wrong, I've been waiting far too long
for you to be mine"

(-placebo)

xxx

If there's one thing you hate about Tony it is everything.

Those enticing eyes and that stupid smirk, all of which are ever-present in your dreams and in your nightmares. They keep you up at night - the thought of being reflected in those blue mirrors, the thought of being explored by those lips.

But it's not right because there's Michelle and she's supposed to be your friend, goddammit. She was the one who was there for you when you needed to spill your secret and never once did she judge. You couldn't do that to her...

...or at least that's what you tell yourself.

xxx

If there's one thing you love about Tony it is his tongue.

Not in that way (well, maybe), but the words that roll of his tongue. Perfect syntax, each syllable flowing into the next like the steps of a dance, making you want to believe everything and anything he says. Beautiful words effortlessly slipping through perfect lips and filling your ears and you just can't bring yourself to comprehend that they're all lies.

Lies are rough and painful, not captivating, not entrancing.

Tony doesn't lie.

xxx

Well, maybe he does lie.

"I'll give you head - now that's friendship."

You just look at him and you see what you've been longing for: yourself in his eyes. But it's wrong, it's wrong because Michelle is there, too, and you just can't bring yourself to justify it. Friendship - that's a lie. A friend wouldn't put you in that situation, wouldn't tempt you like that (but then again, you never wanted to be just his friend).

"We're in Russia and I want to try something new."

"Try something new" - you wrinkle your nose at how careless he sounds, as though it's not cheating because you're not a girl. It's times like this that you wish you had no conscience, that you didn't care who you hurt, because, damn, you would like him to try something new. But you just say "I don't want to be your experiment, Tony."

Because, well, maybe you lie, too.

xxx

You're so drunk and Russia's so cold and Tony...well, Tony's so warm.

His lips are setting fire to your body, burning and smoldering with every kiss, with every nip. They leave you wanting more, they leave you unable to say "no" no matter how loudly and how many times your conscience screams the word - it just won't leave your mouth. His lips move their way to your neck as his hands snake underneath your shirt and, well, you just close your eyes so you don't see Michelle (out of sight, out of mind, as they say). Besides, it's obvious Tony doesn't want her anymore - he wants something new, he wants you.

And Tony always gets what he wants.

xxx

When it's all over and he rises off his knees to give you that smirk of his, the guilt really hits you. You shake your head, trying to clear the ecstasy from mixing with and persuading your conscience that this was perfectly fine because, fuck, this isn't right, this isn't how you wanted it. Well, parts of it were (his tongue excels in more than just sentences), but not this terrible nagging feeling that fills your stomach.

Because you know Michelle will never forgive you if she finds out.

("She won't find out. She doesn't have to know.")

So you do the only thing you can think of doing: you lie ("I guess we've finally found something you aren't good at, Tony").

This is for Kimmy(xakemii) because she adores Tony/Maxxie as much as I do and yeah. I hope you like it, Kimmy!

The lyrics at the beginning belong to the amazing band Placebo and are from their song Centrefolds. The title is from A Skylit Drive's song of the same name.

Thanks mew for betaing! Even you couldn't deny the hawtness possessed by Tony/Maxxie ;P