Disclaimer: No, I don't own Kuch Kuch Hota Hai, that belongs to Karan Johar and whoever produced it. And the song belongs to Michael Jackson and God knows who else.
A/N: Yes. That's right. Michael Jackson. Don't ask. Because chances are, I'll tell you anyway. Stupid school speech night. Stupid Michael Jackson Medley we had to learn that got stuck in my head and made me think 'Hey, that song so totally fits with KKHH!!' and wouldn't get out of my head until I wrote this.
I'm on a roll, it seems. This is my second fic in as many days, and my third in the past two weeks. Hmmm...
You've seen me write Bollywood. You (may) have seen me write songfic (under a different username). But until now, you have not seen the unthinkable. The unimaginable (if you have limited imagination like me, that is).
Bollywood songfic. To Michael Jackson's 'You Are Not Alone'.
--shock horror--
And don't do what I do when I read songfic. Don't skip the song lyrics. Read them. And if you know the tune, possibly sing them. I'm serious. This fic is like twice as meaningful with the song lyrics because the song totally fits.
Just read. And review. Yep, that's right, review.
-----
You Are Not Alone
-----
Another day has gone
I'm still all alone
How could this be?
You're not here with me
He sat, staring at his hands. Staring at the dull wedding ring on his finger. The ring that hadn't sparkled for eight long years. The ring that reminded him that he had no right to love Anjali. He had loved Tina. Now, just because Tina was gone, it didn't mean that he could have Anjali. He couldn't just forget her like that, just to be with Anjali. It would be a sin. An insult to Tina's memory. He couldn't do it.
And besides, why Anjali? What had she done for him, anyway?
She was your best friend ever. And she loved you. Isn't that enough?
You never said goodbye
Someone tell me why
Did you have to go
And leave my world so cold...
He glared at his lifeless wedding ring. Yes, he thought. She loved me so much that she went away. Without even a proper goodbye. If Tina hadn't found out and told me, she would have disappeared. Just like that.
He and Tina had been very happy together, but there had always been a certain emptiness in his life. He wouldn't ever admit it, but the hole was Anjali's presence. He didn't know anything about her anymore. He didn't know where she was, what she was doing, or even if she was alive. But a moment didn't go past when he didn't think about her.
Every time he looked at his daughter, he thought of her. Every time he heard the name Anjali, he thought of her. He heard the name Anjali a lot. Considering how Tina had made him promise to name their daughter just that. Every moment he spent with Anjali Khanna was a moment spent dwelling on Anjali Sharma.
For the first time in nine years, at that 'stupid' summer camp (which he had re-dubbed the best bloody summer camp in the world), he had felt alive again. That hole of emptiness in him was gone, filled by Anjali's solid and comforting presence.
When they had met again, he had been bowled over. She looked so beautiful. So different from when she had been in college. But he feared that she had changed. That she was not the same. His best friend played basketball, she didn't wear saris. Saris got in the way. But they looked so beautiful.
He gave a small laugh, blinking his eyes rapidly to stop the prickly feeling in them. That's the only way I can win against her, he thought. How pathetic. I only beat her in basketball because her dress got in the way.
He discovered later that she was the same girl from college, but different at the same time. At times he felt that she was the same bubbly, happy girl who had been his best friend in college. At others, he barely recognized her. Even at the times that she was happy and outgoing, there would be a wariness about her. Her eyes would be shielded and her smile would not always reach them. It was only sometimes, when she would be quiet and disoriented, looking at him, her eyes for once vulnerable. The impenetrable shield would weaken ever so slightly and he would see a flicker of something odd, something he had never seen in her gaze before, something he couldn't put a name to. But then the moment would pass and it would be gone, to be replaced by the shield.
And that night, on the gazebo, in the rain, for the first time, he saw that strange flicker in her eyes, only this time it stayed there. And he had known that whatever the hell 'it' was, his eyes had mirrored it.
He was pretty damn sure he knew what that 'it' was now, but he couldn't. He just couldn't. Tina. And she couldn't either. Aman. The telephone man. But more so Tina. Tina. He couldn't forget Tina. He couldn't be happy when Tina was gone. Tina. He blinked rapidly. No. He had promised. He closed his eyes.
Everyday I sit and ask myself
How did love slip away?
Something whispers in my ear and says
That you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart
He felt a soft hand wipe the tears threatening to fall. He looked up. It was Tina. She sat next to him, smiling, her face radiant. Smiling, but not saying anything. He stared, transfixed. He swallowed the lump in his throat. She nodded, taking his hand in hers, silently answering the question he hadn't asked. He stared down at their intertwined hands and looked back up.
But you are not alone
I am here with you
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart
Tina smiled, bringing their intertwined hands up to her heart and then slowly moving them until they were against his chest. He looked into her eyes, uncertain. She smiled gently, knowingly and most amazing of all, encouragingly. She may not have said a word, but that one gaze said it all.
Love is not a sin, Rahul. I love you, and I want you to be happy. And who can better give you that happiness than Anjali? I may have become your friend, Rahul, but I could never become your best friend. I don't want you to spend the rest of your life grieving. Live your life, Rahul. Be happy.
She embraced him and he was free. A single tear rolled down his face. The first tear he had shed since Tina had gone. He sighed and hugged her tightly.
For you are not alone
I am here with you
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart
He opened his eyes. The room was empty except for him, he knew in his heart that he was not alone. Tina was watching over him. He knew it for sure. He also knew what he had to do. He had to go tell Anjali. He had to tell her. He owed it to her. He didn't know what was going to happen, wedding to Aman or not, he had to let her know at the very least. He wouldn't forgive himself if he didn't at least try – he didn't want to spend the rest of his life pondering on what-if's.
He stood up, determined. Today, he would tell Anjali. He now had the strength to. Tina's strength.
For you are not alone...
-----
A/N: My first KKHH fic. Wow. I hope you guys like it. Please review. What did you think about Karan's debut? It's my favourite out of his movies, though I hate and love the fact that he made Tina so damn hard to hate even though she was getting in between Rahul and Anjali. She was such a lovely person, though. Which is what made me unable to hate her. Which I hated, because she was keeping Rahul and Anjali apart. Anyways, please review.