I do not own Hikaru no Go
Summary
"I won't play Go cause brother's playing it." What could expectations do to a child? What will happen if Hikaru experiences the burden of expectations? Being Sai's brother might be heaven but to be Honinbo Sai's brother, the renowned Go prodigy, it might be what you call, HELL.
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EXPECTATIONS
by emeraldxonyx
CHAPTER 1 Dreams
"I WON'T PLAY GO ANYMORE!" A child of seven shouted on his empty room. The child had a unique hair color, black hair with bleach bangs – a combination that would make anyone looked twice if he or she ever passed on him. But today, if anyone saw him, the hair color would not be the first one to be noticed. The boy, who was usually judged a punk due to his distinctive bangs, would not be seen as one. For at present, all that could be seen was the child's tears.
"Hikaru." A young man's voice called. "Hikaru." No response. "Hikaruuuuuuuuuuuu….." The young man's voice had turned into a child-like tone – more like a child wailing after not getting what he wanted. And today, the young man wanted to get this little brother of his up.
The little brother opened his eyes a little to take a peek. He saw his twenty-four year old brother urging him to wake up. Hikaru sighed and covered his eyes with his hand. "Ah, it's only a dream." The boy thought to himself. He thought he would wake up to see a sixteen year old Sai asking what was wrong to a seven year old Hikaru. The dream was a true experience from the past. It was an event that up to now had influenced Hikaru's way of life. The boy sighed. So much for contemplation… Right now, what Hikaru needed was silence but he doubt he would get that easily.
"Nii-chan…I don't want to get up yet!" The boy said grumpily, glared at the young man waking him and then moved on his bed, facing his back to the source of that irritating voice.
"Hikaruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu…" The older brother ignored the glare and continued calling his brother's name and at the same time pulling his brother to a sit. "Hikaru-chan, wakie…wakie…" The young man called childishly. Sai knew that this action would make Hikaru irritated enough to wake up. "Hikaru-chan?" Sai nagged more and then there was silence. The older brother waited for Hikaru's outburst, when after a minute and the anticipated reaction was not seen, Sai tried his plan once more. "Hika…" But he did not finished his sentence cause suddenly a pillow was thrown to his handsome face.
Blog. Sai fell out the bed; the pillow, which was the cause of his 'demise', lay scattered on the floor.
"Owww. Hikaru, you're so mean!" Sai glared at his brother who was currently sitting up in his bed and gazing at the 'disaster' – his so-called brother.
Hikaru took no notice of the glare, yawned and then stretched his body – trying to wake himself up and for another reason – that is to buy time for himself. He only had a few seconds of silence left, for after his brother recovered from what he secretly calls – "the glaring period", his elder brother would definitely give him his punishment. And that was…
"HIKARU!!" Sai called, his voice rising to more than the normal hearing decibels.
"Speaking of hell…" Hikaru thought as he was drag by Sai into a big hug where his ear would definitely experience noise pollution. "I hoped my hearing would still be normal after this." The boy wished.
"Hikaru, you should not treat me like that. I'm older than you." Sai reprimanded, his voice taking a serious tone though Hikaru knew it was an act. He was after all Sai's favorite brother (it would be a surprise if he's not the favorite sibling, after all they had no other brothers or sisters).
Hikaru nodded his head in understanding. Sai's way, way older than him. He's twenty-four and Hikaru's only fifteen - a difference of nine years. "Yeh, definitely he's older."Hikaru thought sarcastically. But if maturity would be the basis, Hikaru thinks he's more mature than his brother. This only holds true in their relationship as brothers, outside the area, Sai's the mature one. Hikaru, himself, could not really understand why Sai could act child-like only to him. In front of their parents and other people, in front of the Go world, they only knew the serious Sai.
"Hikaru? Hikaru?" Sai called. "HI-KA-RU?" This time Sai cried his brother's name in a louder voice.
"Oww." Hikaru covered his ears. "What was that for?" He asked.
"Ah. Hehe. Thought you were daydreaming or something. I called you thrice." Sai chuckled while explaining.
Hikaru, who successfully released himself for Sai, made his way to breakfast. His older brother followed him. Sai was unusually quiet on their way down and Hikaru did not like this. "Talk about irony." Hikaru muttered to himself. Just awhile ago he's hoping for a quiet Sai but when he got one, he did not like it in the least.
"Nii-chan, is there something wrong?" Hikaru decided to ask.
Sai looked at Hikaru and sighed. He knew that his answer would make Hikaru frown or angry (at most) but he still had to try.
"Eh…I was wondering if…." A long silence followed.
"Karu-chan…"
Hikaru frowned. He knew where this would lead. "No. I don't want to go."
"But Hikaru…Please just once, come with me in a Go tournament. You'll have fun in it. Teenagers like you are going to play." Sai told his brother excitedly.
"I don't want them to see me." Hikaru rebutted calmly. Since childhood, he had tried to part himself from Go or should he say, from the Go world itself. But unfortunately for him, he's love for Go did not make him that successful. And what happened was he could only not make others know that he plays Go or that he's interested in it. Why? The reason was clear to him, he did not like the feeling of pressure, the burden of expectations of being the Go prodigy's brother. He did not want to be compared. Maybe this feeling was something wrong. It's as if he was running away but the pressure had traumatized him when he was only a child. And a child himself, during that time, he did not know what to do but rely on his defense mechanisms to protect his self. And his mind and body told him to run away from it. Hikaru was snapped out of his trance at Sai's voice.
"There will be a large crowd. No one will notice you." Sai gave his rationalization, he knew Hikaru's fear but he's doing this to help his brother get out of the shell he had placed himself. "Please."
Hikaru was silent. He was considering Sai's suggestion. It's true that with the crowd, no one will take notice of him. He could also watch the games. It had been a long time since he came to a Go tournament. Though, he had swore to distance away from Go, he could not do so. Hikaru looked at his brother's begging face. Hikaru smiled at his aniki.
"Okay. I'll go with you…" Sai smiled with glee. "…but I'll part from you after we arrived, everyone will definitely notice me if I entered with you." Hikaru bargained.
Sai nodded his head twice still smiling. "This is definitely a good start." He thought.
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Author's Notes:
What do you think? It just came up. It is not that good. I know. I'm still trying to understand the story itself. Weird, eh?
Don't you think Hikaru seems weak in this story? Is the story no good? Wahhh…I think it's not a good idea to post it…But I'll take my chance…so please tell me whatever you think – good or bad, I can accept.
I hope you'll review.
Thanks for giving your time to read this chapter.