Author's note: So this was supposed to be short and sweet and fluffy, but it ended up being a novella. Mostly Zutara, it was a cute little concept that didn't want to leave me alone. So here it is, complete in five chapters and an epilogue. Since I wrote it start to finish, I don't plan any further author's notes, either - besides, I think I've said all that's needed. Enjoy!
The first time they touched, it was an accident.
The air temple was quiet. Everyone was sound asleep – she could hear Sokka's snoring from her place above them. She felt a fond warmth rocket through her at the thought of their little band, the family she never expected and knew now she'd never be able to do without. She looked into the sky. It was a full moon and she could feel it, feel the pull, the flow in her very veins, and she gave a smile for the sweet spirit her brother had so loved that had sacrificed her life so that others would live. Nights like this always gave her the feeling that Yue was guarding them as well as she could from her celestial perch, and it was a comfort in times that were so uncertain. Katara, as usual on full moons, had been filled with so much energy that sleep was a dream and that very build-up was what found her in the small garden several levels above their group's chosen sleeping level, the waters from the fountains streaming around her and dancing at her command and for her joy. She could feel the slow waning of her powers that signified the imminent rising of the sun but she kept bending the water around and around, fanciful shapes and flowing ribbons not intended for battle but rather celebration. She was cocooned in tranquility, and as was often the case it enabled her to see things more objectively than she was usually able to by the light of day. It was what led her thoughts to him.
Their enemy – though he claimed he was no longer. Had it not been for Ba Sing Se, she would have been thrilled to hear his contrite words and his regret, would have welcomed him to the group with open arms. But Katara knew about pain, and betrayal, and she was reluctant to place the safety of everyone she loved in the hands of the scarred boy that had turned against her so easily. She was reluctant for other reasons as well, though they had less to do with the safety of the others and more to do with her own heart. She was a naturally warm person – it was in her nature to want to help and to care for everyone. The others thought she was bossy and mothering, and she knew they were right, but she also knew that if she were any other way it wouldn't be her. She was a caretaker, a healer, a confidante, a friend. And she had welcomed the exiled prince into her graces once, a small window in time when it was just the two of them, a short moment when they hadn't been standing on opposite sides of a war but simply on opposite sides of a cave, and she realized he'd been hurt as badly as she had. She couldn't stand to see anything hurting. And so she spoke with him, touched him, and the shock and hesitance in his golden gaze – so like a wild creature that had been beaten, afraid to trust an outstretched hand – broke her heart.
And then he broke it again with his betrayal and she vowed to keep a tighter hold on her forgiveness. She would never let herself be weak like that again.
Was it any wonder she refused to allow him in now? He came to them, threw himself on their mercies, and against the wishes of her heart it had been agreed to give him a chance. To his credit she had to admit that he hadn't yet to do anything to deserve her scorn, but she had let him close once and it had nearly cost her a friend – not to mention what it did to her soul. He could have arrived with Fire Lord Ozai's head on a platter and she still would have refused to trust him. Still, he had begun to earn himself a place with everyone else, though he was always apart, always aloof, and the part of herself that she was now calling a sucker wanted to feel for the young man who was trying to change and unsure how to. But he was slowly becoming an accepted part of their group – of her family. It burned her inside, the fact that after everything, after he had shredded her trust like so much cabbage, that he was earning the regard of those she cared most for. She was not ready to trust him – she couldn't. She wouldn't. No matter how those golden eyes gazed at her, she could not fall for their warmth again. Because that warmth was a lie. She knew it. So she kept her guard up and protected herself and her family as best she could.
The moon had almost completely disappeared and she breathed a final goodbye to Yue as the silver disk slipped beneath the horizon. The sky was changing from silver-lit beauty to the golden-red of sunrise, and though she was a child of water and more deeply connected to the moon than most, even she had to admit that the glow of the rising sun that set the entire world ablaze in yellow heat was just as beautiful in its own way. She let the water she'd been caressing flow back into the fountain and turned, knowing it was time to start the day, only to gasp and draw it back to her hands once more, for less peaceful reasons.
Standing not ten feet behind her, obviously not having expected to find her here, was the very subject of her recent thoughts. His dark hair had been pulled back in a loose ponytail, his chest bare as well as his feet, and his eyes full of shock. Reluctantly she let the water down slowly – she had promised to behave, and though she was still filled with the urge to beat him severely for daring to hurt her as he had – steadfastly refusing to ask herself why betrayal from someone she didn't know should hurt so much – she would be the reasonable person she knew she could be.
"Zuko," she stated, the word both a warning and a question.
"I'm sorry, I didn't know you were here. I'll find somewhere else -"
"Nonsense. I was just leaving." She knew he meditated in the early dawn, the fire inside him waking as the one in the sky did.
"Are you sure? I can go to another area."
"I'm going." She had to walk past him to the stairway and he happened to be standing at the narrowest part of the path but she inclined her head regally and strode past. Fate, however, seemed to want to taunt her one last time. Just as she was brushing past him he shifted to let her pass, and her foot came down on a piece of loose shale. Suddenly her entire world was thrown off balance as she slipped and she reached out to brace herself...and her hands slammed into his chest as his own arms came up to catch her. For a long moment they stood there, both frozen by their proximity to one another as well as by the other, less pleasant threads of their past, and she couldn't help but notice the way the newborn sun made his eyes glow like flames, how his body heat against her hands, radiating from his arms around her waist, was so much warmer than her most comfortable blanket. They had touched before, true, but nothing like this, this closeness. Even in the cave where he'd burned her the most, they had not touched like this. It wasn't until she realized she had subconsciously matched her breathing to his, inhale for inhale, exhale for exhale, that she pulled herself to her senses and yanked away, fleeing back to the safety of the group and the thankful repetitiveness of daily work, blocking out the sensations that had rocketed through her and doing her best to convince herself that she could never trust him again.
On the upper level a young man sat on the edge of a fountain, confused and worn, wondering what on earth had just happened. He shook himself and began his morning meditation, drowning out the feel of her soft strength with sheer force of will as he welcomed the day with shaken reverence.