Some time ago, my editor and I were watching Transformers Prime Season 1 Episode 20: Partners when this idea popped up.
Just to be clear, this isn't related to Trine Me. Apologies in advance if the characters are OOC, but this is (attempted) humor.
As always, I don't own Transformers.
"I have been a fool. Made mistakes. Monumental ones. I now realize I was never destined to be leader, or even an equal partner. And, I am at peace with that. I have gained a clear understanding of my place in the universe. Of who I am. Of who I was always meant to be. Starscream: second in command, humble servant to Lord Megatron. Thank you for listening, Soundwave."
Starscream spun around and began to walk away in the direction of the command bridge. Soundwave assumed that was everything he had to say, but before he could turn to leave, the SIC stopped and continued.
"To understand how I reached this point, we must go back. Far back into my past, to the beginning of the beginning. To the point where it all started, the moment that would set me off towards the path leading to this very moment."
Oh no…
Oblivious to the dread of the silent mech, Starscream said. "Yes, I know, you're speechless at how good it was. Poetry just comes naturally to me. Well, that was just the prologue to The Odyssey of Starscream: The Beginning, a prelude to the first of 11 trilogies in the saga as part of The Odyssey of Starscream Series. My memoirs."
A Starscream…series?
"We're going to have make multiple copies. Hundreds, thousands, maybe even millions! Everyone's going to be lining up to get their servos on their own copy. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if it sold out within a cycle, this is after all, my story. Who wouldn't want to know about my amazing life?"
Soundwave shot him an incredulous look, or tried to at least. It wasn't easy to express anything without facial features.
"I've even came up with a few pose ideas for the cover artwork." Starscream struck a dramatic pose, having a fist up to his head's height.
"I admit I'm a bit divided, because this one shows my strength, but this one," He got into the thinker pose, "shows my intellectual side. I want something that defines me, Starscream. Powerful, but thoughtful. Awe-inspiring, but relatable. Proud, but also humble."
Make it stop! Make it stop! Soundwave wanted to bang his head against the nearest wall. If he had to hear one more oxymoron of Starscream's 'great' qualities, someone was going to get hurt.
The whole time, Soundwave kept shooting glances at the doors to the bridge where Megatron was. He was hoping Megatron would barge in through the doors and demand he find the location of the Autobot base or some other impossible task. Anything to get him out of this. But no such luck. The doors remained sealed.
"Make sure you get everything Soundwave. It's more than just a story about me. It's my voice, the story of a brilliant Decepticon, the best second in command to have ever existed, a historical record for the distant future. My legacy."
You have got to be kidding me. Soundwave spared one last desperate look at the doors to the bridge, resigning himself to endure until Megatron called him.
"Now," Starscream cleared his voice box. "Chapter 1: The Beginning..."
You can buy your copy at any bookstore, or on Amazon. An audio version is now available in ! No. Not really. Unfortunately, Starscream wouldn't be able to make a living by selling his autobiography.
I hoped you all enjoyed that small drabble. Thanks for reading!