Carefully she stepped down the marble steps of the stairs, a couple more feet and she'd have her freedom. A couple more feet and she'd no longer have to deal with him. A couple more steps and she could breath easily. Using only the moonlight that was coming through the skylight above the foyer, she quietly unlocked the door, grateful that her bastard husband hadn't activated the alarm in his drunken haze. She stepped out and swiftly turned around pulling the door knob and shutting the door so it wouldn't make a sound.
She ran down the steps of the house and never looked back. She gripped the strap of her duffel bag and walked away from it all. From the luxury, from the money, from the husband. From the life she condemned herself to have. Keeping her head down, she walked a couple blocks and found the bicycle she had hidden a couple days earlier and mounted it. Making sure her bag was securely strapped to her back, she peddled her way to the bus station.
The sun had just begun to rise and for the first time since she was 17, Santana let herself enjoy the day. She basked in its warmth and welcomed the fresh morning breeze. Her thighs burned from peddling and her lungs were on fire but when she saw the bus station coming up, she didn't feel a damn thing except relief.
She set the bicycle aside and pulled out her one way ticket to Maine from her bag. She had never been to Maine but it was the farthest away from this life as she could get. Santana made her way towards the line of buses looking for hers. She kept her head down and made sure her hood was covering her face as much as possible. She wasn't free yet. She had to be careful. Finally she spotted her bus. She made her way toward it and showed the driver her ticket, making as little eye-contact as possible. The more eye-contact she made, the more likely someone would recognize her.
After she had gotten the okay from the gentleman, she hopped on the bus and made her way to the back. She chose the spot near the window. She slumped down in her seat and held on to her bag for dear life. She clutched onto the bag hoping to channel her anxiety. The only things she had to call her own were in that bag. That bag was the only thing from her past life she chose to bring, the bare necessities.
The driver announced they would be departing in 15 minutes. These were 15 minutes were nothing compared to the last seven years. She was only 15 minutes away from freedom. Slowly the rest of the passengers settled in. There were a lot more than she'd thought there would be. More of a crowd to blend in with but more eyes to recognize her. She pulled her hood down some more and clenched her hand around the bag tighter.
As they pulled out of the bus depot, it finally hit her: she was leaving San Francisco. There was no turning back and racing back before he woke up. There was no stopping her. She was scared of moving across the country by herself but she was more terrified of him. She never knew which punch would be her last.
After a few hours, she saw a sign that thanked her for visiting California and another that welcomed her to Nevada. In a day's time, she'd be in her new home. She saw the entire country through her window and her thoughts drifting back to when she first met Noah.
They both went to high school together, she was a cheerleader and he was a jock, Noah Puckerman. They started dating freshman year, they even lost their virginities to each other. Soon after that, Noah started sleeping around behind her back but Santana didn't care. She started hiding her own secret. She would accept the burden of a cheating boyfriend because she needed to keep herself hidden; she needed him so no one would know she was a lesbian. Then a new transfer from Carmel high, changed everything for her. She had fallen in love. Her new best friend became her secret love. One day after practice, her new love kissed in front of their lockers. Santana didn't even get a chance to kiss back before her boyfriend yanked her back by her hair. That was the first time he hit her. Noah threatened to out her, to her parents, to her friends. Everyone. She couldn't have her parents knowing that she was seen kissing a girl. No matter how much she'd deny it, she knew what she really was and it would only be a matter of time before they'd figure it out. So, she stayed with him. She stayed with him all through college. She became the perfect housewife to keep him content and to keep her parents happy. She put up with the beatings and the yellings and the drunken attempts to force himself on her. She put up with it for seven years. Until she couldn't take it anymore.
Before she had knew it, she was in Maine. She stepped off that bus a new woman. No longer was she Santana Puckerman. According to the new set of identification she paid for in San Francisco, she was Gabriela Hernandez.
New town, new state, she didn't know a soul. She needed a moment to digest everything. She didn't plan this far ahead. She didn't think she'd actually make it this far. She waited until everyone was off the bus before she got off. She walked over to the benches, setting her bag in her lap. She closed her eyes and groaned, feeling the after-math of being cooped up in the bus for so long.
"Hey, lady. Are you all right?" She felt a poke to her cheek. She opened her eyes to see a little girl with her dirty blonde hair in pigtails staring at her. Her hazel eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Are you alive? You haven't moved and you've been sitting there for hours." the little girl said as she emphasized the 'hours.'
The little blonde girl's innocence brought a smile to her face. She was reminded that not everything in the world was horrible; not everything revolved around her husband. "No, I'm not dead. Just thinking. Thank you for making sure though. I do appreciate it, little lady." she booped the little girl's nose, making her smile.
"My name is Rebecca Fabray. My mommy says I shouldn't talk to strangers because they're dangerous but you're too pretty to be dangerous. And now you know my name and if you tell me yours, we won't be strangers." the little girl, now named Rebecca, stuck out her tiny hand for Santana to shake.
Now was her chance to reinvent herself, to give herself a new life. She felt a little guilty lying to Rebecca but she had no choice. She shook the girl's hand, "Hi, Miss Fabray. I'm Gabriela. Nice to meet you."
"Becca!" Santana heard a woman's voice from the other side of the yard.
"That's my mommy. I guess she's looking for me." Rebecca shrugged in mild annoyance. Santana couldn't help but to smile at this little girl's antics.
"Becca!" Santana heard closer. She looked up to see a frazzled blonde woman stepping closer to them. "Becca, what did I tell you about sneaking off like that? You could've been hurt!" The blonde woman grabs Becca's shoulders and inspects her making sure making she was all right.
Santana didn't know what to do so she just sat there looking at the mother and daughter, in awe and maybe a bit of jealously. She wonders if maybe her mother had been as nurturing as this woman is to little Rebecca, if she'd be a battered woman on the run.
"Mommy, this is my new friend, Gabriela. Isn't she pretty? Her hair is super pretty!" Becca gushed over her new friend, bringing Santana out of her thoughts and making her blush a little. She hadn't had anyone sincerely compliment her looks in over seven years. She wasn't supposed to leave the house by herself. When she did leave, she was with Noah and no one dared speak to her in his presence.
"Hi, Quinn Fabray." The woman introduced herself as she stood behind Becca, holding her shoulders. "I apologize for my daughter's forwardness, she gets that from her mom."
The little girl emphatically nodded, "I sure do!"
Santana stood up to shake Quinn's hand, "No problem, it was quite refreshing actually. It was quite the break I needed from the past day. The past couple of years actually." Santana trailed off. "Gabriela Hernandez. Nice to meet both of you."
"It was nice meeting you but I gotta get this one here over to her mom's so I can go to work. If you're ever in Westchester, look us up. Bye, Gabriela."
"Bye, Gabriela! See you around."
Santana waved back. That wasn't that bad. She could do this, she could meet knew people and start again. She looked around and spotted a kiosk with maps. She looked the one posted behind the glass. Her eye caught the name Westchester. She didn't have any idea where else to go so she figured why not head there. Surely she could find an apartment and a job. She decided, she was going to live in Westchester. She picked a cab up from in of front the depot and instructed the driver to Westchester. It wasn't that far away according to the driver.
"So, are you visiting? Maine is an odd place to vacation for summer. Usually you college kids go to Florida or Mexico." the cab driver asks over the music on the classic rock on the radio.
"I'm a little too old to be a college kid but thanks for the compliment. No, I just needed a change of pace. I needed something new. I do love some fresh lobsters so why not Maine?" Santana lightly joked.
"Well, Westchester is a great little town. Nice people. Everyone likes it there. Where would you like me to drop you off?" The driver looks back at her through the rear-view mirror.
Santana shrinks a little in her seat feeling uncomfortable under his gaze. "I have no idea. But I could kill for some coffee. Is there a coffee house or diner?"
"I know just the place."
The rest of the drive, Santana looked out the window at all the greenery. She found solace in the beauty of the nature surrounding her. She felt at peace. She no longer had to worry about being the perfect housewife with for fear of getting hit. No more covering bruises with make up. No more living in fear. No more living with regret. No more. She could see the makings of a town getting closer. She could see all the kids on the sidewalk playing, the quaint shops, and the beautiful homes. She could see herself being at peace in a place like this; she could feel herself being happy.
"Just two more towns and we're there." the cab driver announced.
"All right, thanks." Santana closed her eyes for a little bit. She really couldn't get over how peaceful she felt. There was no paranoia, no fear, no shame.
An hour later, they were pulling up in front of a diner.
"Here we are. The fare comes out to $56.30." Santana pulled out some bills and handed it to the driver.
"Good luck, miss." the driver said before she got out.
"Thanks. Drive safe." she stood in front of the diner. She looked up and saw "Evan's Diner" in lights above the entrance. She inhaled and pulled open the door. She was instantly met with a little, old lady in a typical diner uniform.
"Hi, welcome to Evan's. Just you, sweetie?" The lady asked, her voice being the epitome of sweet.
"Yes, ma'am. Just me."
"Do you want a booth or do you want to sit at the counter?"
"May have a booth, please? Unless, that'd be a problem. I, uh, I wouldn't want to take up too much space." She inwardly chides herself for being so awkward. She reminds herself that he won't find her here. He can't.
"A little ol' thing like you, not at all. Come with me." the little lady put her hand on Santana's arms causing her to instinctively pull her arm back. The woman noticed and brought back her hand. "I'm sorry, honey. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."
Santana looked down and wrapped her arm around herself. She was embarrassed that she reacted like that. She knew no one could hurt her anymore but she reacted out of instinct. "It's fine."
"Okay, here you are. Sam will be here in a sec. I'm sorry, hun." she offered an apologetically nod and placed the menu on the table.
Santana set her bag down and sat down. She wasn't really hungry, she chalked it up to nerves, but figured she shouldn't drink coffee on an empty stomach.
"Good morning, thanks for coming today. My name is Sam. Sam I am. And I don't like green eggs and hams. What can I get for you?" a tall blonde man asked Santana.
"Could I just have some pancakes and a coffee. Black. Please?"
"Do you want regular ol' pancakes or like blueberry or chocolate chip? My little sister loves those." Sam asked.
Noah didn't like it when she ate too many carbs. He expected her to maintain her physique.
"You know what? Can I get the chocolate chip pancakes, like five of them, with scrambled eggs and bacon? Like an huge helping of bacon? Like an entire plate's worth? And a milkshake. And if you have any breadsticks that would be fantastic." she finished listing off her foods. She didn't need to look a certain way to meet his standards anymore, she was going to eat whatever she wanted to eat.
Her order left Sam speechless. "Um, you're going to eat all of that?"
"Yes, is there something wrong with that?" Santana ducked her head, she knew she shouldn't have asked for all of that. "I can just stick t–"
"No, I was just surprised. Usually pretty girls like you stick to salads. It's refreshing to see a little ladies like you to have a nice appetite. Only Brittany eats like that, boy, can she put it away. Don't worry, I'll make sure you get your feast." Sam assured with a wink before walking away.
Santana felt relief as she received positive praise for her hearty appetite. She figured she could eat and then check into an inn or motel so she could find something for rent or something more long-term. She had enough money to hold her over a while but she didn't want to dig too deep into it. She graduated with a bachelors in accounting but never needed to use it. Noah didn't want her working. According to him, she was only good for two things, cleaning and fucking. She ducked her head in shame. She spent seven years with him, she let him do those things to her for seven years. Seven years too long.
She looked up as she heard a plate being set on the table. "Heeere we are." Sam announced as he set the plate of only bacon down, followed by the eggs.
"Oh, that was fast." she licked her lips. She wasn't too hungry but she could stand to eat.
"I had them rush it. You seemed really enthused to eat and I haven't seen you here before so I figured I had to make a good impression." Sam blushed a bit as he told Santana.
"Well, I've never been here before but I plan to move here." Santana unwrapped her utensils and dug into her eggs.
"Really?" Sam asked as he motioned to the open seat in front of her, silently asking her if he could sit. Santana nodded but slid farther back into the booth adding to the distance between them. "Usually people are trying to move away from here, not move here. Do you know anyone here?"
Santana put down her fork and wiped her mouth with a napkin. "Nope. I actually never heard of this place until I got off the bus this morning. I met a lady and her daughter and she mentioned this town and I figured why not?" she shrugged as she took a sip of her coffee. "Wow, that's good coffee."
"Wow, that's brave." Sam said in awe. "You just randomly chose a place to live. Brave."
Santana blushed at another compliment. It was only her first day away and she had already received more compliments from strangers than she did from her husband. She finished chewing the piece of bacon, "Thanks."
"I know this is forward, but I finish my shift in a few and I figured you need a guide. Like, someone to show you around." Sam quietly asked as he reached for a packet of sugar to play with.
"Are you hitting on me?" Santana bluntly asked.
Sam instantly reddened and looked away. "You're very pretty and we don't get a lot of people around here and you eat like a guy so..." he quietly finished.
"I like girls." Santana blurted out. She's never said that to anyone before and the first person she's says it to is a stranger. She drops her fork and leans back. "I've never said that out loud before." she whispers as she looks up to look at Sam. His eyes are wide with surprise.
"Wow, that kinda' sucks for me but it's also really cool. But still I assume you don't have anywhere to stay here?"
"That's it? You're not going to say anything else?" She asks in disbelief and leans a little more, "I just told you I'm gay and you have nothing to say?"
"Nope. What is there to say?" Sam shrugs his shoulders. "Wait, I don't know your name."
Santana almost answers her real name but quickly corrects it. "Gabriela Hernandez."
"Nice. Well, Gabriela, you finish your burly meal and I'll go finish up. I'll show you some apartments afterwards."
It wouldn't hurt to have someone show her around but she really wasn't ready to begin to trust someone. "Can we walk instead of drive?" She figured if anything should happen, she could just walk away instead of having to jump out of a moving vehicle.
"Sure, that sounds good. I'll see you in a bit, Gabriela." He got up and left Santana to finish her breakfast.
She finished her entire breakfast faster than she thought. She stacked all the empty plates and quickly wiped down the table with a napkin. She got up and paid the cashier. She saw Sam standing outside waving at people walking by. She steps out and greets him. He tries to pat her shoulder but Santana moves away.
"I'm sorry, I just..." she trails off not sure how to explain or even if she has to explain.
"No, it's fine." he shoves his hands in his pockets and starts walking. "Wait, do you need help with your bag? It seems almost bigger than you." he says lightly.
Truth is it was breaking Santana's back but she did not know Sam at all. She was already pushing it enough as it is. "No, it's fine. Thank you though. Where are you taking me?" Santana asks as she readjusts the strap on her shoulder.
"I don't want to assume but I don't think you'll be buying a house today?"
"No, not today. Not any time soon." she chuckled.
"Okay, cool. So I'm taking you to my apartment building. They have some apartments open. Aaand, if you say that I referred you, I get 50 bucks off the next three months worth of rent. So, if anything you're doing me a favor." He gives her a sly smile.
"Oh, you're welcome, then. But, they're not too expensive, I hope?" Automatically trying to run some numbers in her head in vain.
"No, not at all. I don't think so. Other places are fancier with gyms and stuff. We can go there, if you want."
"No! I don't want to step foot in another gym for the rest of my life." She thinks back to how Noah had a room added on to the house because he didn't want to give Santana another reason to leave the house. Another reason for someone to possibly see her bruises.
As they made their way to the apartment building, Sam told her a bit about the town. There was only one mall but it had a GameStop so it was good enough, according to Sam. His family owns the only diner in town but there were some restaurants and a bar or two. He added that one weekend of the month, one bar has a gay night, causing Santana to blush.
"I'll go with you even! I'll help you keep the ugly ladies away." Sam offered as he puffed out his chest.
Santana shook her head and said she'd think about it. There wasn't really anything else to say about the town. "Do you think anyone is hiring?" Santana was a bit excited at the prospect of earning her own money and not having to depend on anyone, especially not Noah.
"I know Rosalita's Roadhouse is looking for a bartender but I don't think you'll like it there. I think you can go to the community center to see if anyone's posted anything. I guess you could also check online but usually people here like to do everything old school for the most part. Well, here we are." Sam announced as they walked up to an apartment building. It wasn't anything special, but anything was better than where she was before. "C'mon, the landlady's office is down here. She's nice, just don't touch her. She'll try to spray you down with Lysol." Sam said in all seriousness causing Santana to bite back a laugh.
Sam led them down the hallway to the office. He opened the door for them and a tiny redhead looked up at them. "Hello, Sam! How are you?" the redhead rose to her feet and motioned to the chairs in front of her desk. "Hi, I'm Emma Pillsbury. I'm the landlady here."
"Hi, I'm Gabriela and Sam mentioned you have some available apartments." Santana sat down next to Sam.
"Sure, I have a couple if you want to see them."
"No, it's fine. I just need a one bedroom. And I can pay a couple months up front." Santana quickly said and prayed that Emma didn't ask for any background information. She wasn't sure how reliable all of her fake ID's were.
Emma was a bit taken aback at her forwardness but that wore off and immediately drew up the leasing agreements. Santana was luckily that Emma didn't run a background check or a credit score. She handed Emma a deposit and six months worth of rent in exchange for keys.
Sam offered to walk her up to her apartment. They walked down the hall to the stairs and made their way to the third floor.
"Hey, I'm just one floor below you! Now you can come visit and we'll watch HBO together!" he fist pumped the air.
Santana couldn't help but to laugh at him as they walked in front of the door with 3C on it. She unlocked the door and stepped in. It wasn't anywhere near as luxurious as her last house but she already loved it.
"Do you like it?" Sam asked as he saw Santana look around in awe.
"I fucking love it!" Santana exclaimed. " Sam, show me where the hardware store is and where I can buy home goods, please. I'll buy you some beer if you help me paint." She walked into her tiny kitchen and opened some cabinets imagining how it would look with food in it. "Oh, you know what? I will take you up on watching HBO. I just spent seven years living in a shit storm, I think I deserve to watch some risque television. I think I deserve to gawk at some women now." she walked to the only room and saw the walk-in closet. She smiled as she pictured her contents of her duffel bag in there. She grabbed some money out of her bag and walked into the living room to see Sam standing there.
"You're going to need some furniture, aren't you?" Sam asked slyly.
"I think I just need a bed. I don't really need a place to sit other than a bed. I doubt I'm going to buy a TV. I can just smooch off you." Santana explained as she walked towards the front door, "Come on, show to the store, please. When we finish painting, we'll crack open a few beers." she turned around making Sam stop short to avoid bumping into her. "You aren't busy, are you? I can't paint on my own but I like having talk to..." she looks down at the floor. She likes having Sam to talk to even though she knows she has to keep him at an arm's length away.
"No," he laughed, "I'm not busy. One of my best friends is away visiting family a couple hours away and the other is working so I don't have much to do."
"Great, I could use your height." she said as she sized him, mentally measuring him.
Sam led them towards the hardware store where he tried to get Santana to talk about herself but she became a vault. So, he ended up telling her all about him and his family. Santana surprisingly enjoyed knowing all these seemingly trivial things about Sam. Knowing that he got detention for an entire week his sophomore year in high school for refusing to speak anything other than Ewokese in his English class added some humanity to him. She doesn't think someone that even knows what Ewokese is can potentially hurt her.
When they get to the hardware store, Sam introduces her to the owner, a Will Schuester. Who apparently was having an illicit affair with her new landlady. Sam didn't say much and Santana was glad because she really did not want to imagine that lady and Will doing anything remotely sexual. Sam helped Santana pick out some paint and primer and gave her an entire lecture about the importance of priming before painting. They picked out some contact paper and most importantly, Santana picked out three additional dead bolts.
"Gab, why do you need so many locks? We live in the middle of nowhere Maine."
"Just in case." She answered. It's true. Just in case Noah finds her.
Sam just shrugged his shoulders not knowing what else to say. He told her that he'd bring over his tools to install the locks anyway. "Hey, can we pick up my truck? All these cans and stuff are heavy and we still have to stop by the store." Sam suggested as they were cashing out.
"Sure, of course. It is getting super sunny now." Santana felt a little more comfortable with Sam. Especially after she had to suffer through his Sean Connery impression montage. This guy was just not capable of hurting her. Sam ran out to get his truck. Luckily they weren't too far away from his diner so Santana didn't have to stand out in the sun for too long. Before Santana could lift a bag into the back, Sam came around to do it for her.
"Oh, such a gentleman." She rolls her eyes and jumps into the cab to wait for Sam.
"Okay, let's roll." The drive to the store wasn't too bad. The shocks on the truck seemed to be pretty worn out so it made the ride quite amusing.
In the next store, Santana got the basics. She bought a mattress, super plush, her one major splurge. She was excited to finally have a say in her home. She chose everything she wanted the way she wanted. She bought the foods she wanted and not the foods her husband wanted.
When they finished putting all the things in the truck, around the mattress, of course, Santana really thanked Sam.
"Sam, thanks. You're like the coolest guy I've met since high school. And that guy was only cool because he had a wicked cool car. So, thank you." She sincerely told him.
"Anytime, Gabby. Just don't forget about our HBO date." He said as he pulled into the apartment building. "Don't worry about the big stuff, I got it."
Santana left the big and heavy stuff to Sam, like he said. It wasn't long until Santana and Sam had set everything up, except for the painting. They decided to start painting a different day so they wouldn't get too worn out. After they finished they sat in Santana's living room, on some patio furniture Sam so graciously lent her.
"Sam, you've been really good to me today. I don't know what I would've done without you. There's not enough beer in the world to repay you for what you've done for me." It was true. Apart from what he physically did for her, he showed her that just because Noah was a horrible man, that not all men were horrible. It gave her the tiniest spark of trust in people again. Maybe because she was hundreds of miles from her husband and maybe Sam had been the first decent man to talk to her since she was 17 but she felt like she could grow to trust Sam.
"Don't worry about it. I needed more age appropriate friends anyway. And you're nice to look at so that ain't hurting either. Hopefully you and I can talk about girls because Brittany has been super busy with her studio and other dancing stuff lately. She's always on edge and doesn't do that with me anymore. She's cool, you'll like her."
"I don't know, Sam. Today was the first time I've ever said I was gay out loud. I'm not sure if I can do that yet." She looked down. She'd loved to finally express herself but she just wasn't ready yet.
"Oh, no problem. You're not going anywhere anytime soon, are you?"
"Not if I can help it." She thinks back to the one thing that could make her move: Noah.
"I hate to cut our lesbro bonding time but I have the graveyard shift so I really should get a nap in. But if you need anything, just knock on my door or you can just call me. Here, save your number" he hands her his cell phone.
"Can't. Don't have a phone."
"Oh, okay. Well, let me write down my number somewhere, just in case." Sam walks into the kitchen and writes his number on a napkin. "There." he hands the napkin to Santana as they walk to the door. "Good night, Gabriela. See you tomorrow." Sam leans into to hug Santana but remembers what happened earlier and decides to just wave instead.
"Good night, Sammy." she waves back before closing the door and locking all four locks.
She decides she's earned a hot shower before going to bed. She showers and she swears it's the best shower she's ever taken. Even if the decently sized gash on the side of her forehead stung when the water hit. She wraps one of the new towels she bought with Sam today around herself and walks to bedroom. While she's getting dressed, she catches her body in the mirror. She usually tries to avoid it because seeing the bruises he left on her body always made her feel ashamed. But this time, she saw them differently. She still felt embarrassed to have let someone use her as a punching bag for so long but now she had the satisfaction of knowing it would never happen again.
She laid down after changing into some sleeping clothes. Her sheets smelled like new but soon enough they'd smell like her and she couldn't wait. She laid right in the middle of the bed with her arms and legs spread out. She had the bed all to herself. She didn't have to isolate herself to the very edge of the bed to avoid touching anyone, she didn't have to brace herself for anyone drunkenly trying to force her to have sex. She didn't have to deal with any of that. With that for the first night in seven years, she fell asleep with a smile on her face.