I'm so scared that you will see
All the weakness inside of me
A lone figure stood by the window, his incredibly beautiful eyes dark with emotion. His features were so perfect and still that they looked as if the most talented artist had carved them flawlessly out of stone. Suddenly when his phone rang loudly, interrupting the slightly disconcerting silence.
Slowly he pulled it out of his pocket, checking to see who it was. A small smile began to play at his lips only to be hidden as quickly as it had come. He put it to his ear, pushing the button to answer it, and said softly, "Hello?"
A bright, cheerful voice came on, causing that ethereal smile to cross his face yet again. "Hey! Where are you? Are you doing anything? The rest of us are at the new club right now. Want to come meet us? It's been a while since I've seen you..."
He nodded before remembering that he couldn't be seen. Quietly he said, "Sure. Be there in ten."
Then he hung up, letting his hand drop to his side. He pocketed the phone quickly before walking out of the door and closing the door quickly behind him. Then he climbed into his car and drove away.
"Rui! Over here man!"
Rui looked in the direction of the voice and saw Akira waving frantically, a cheerful grin on his face. Rui began making his way through the crowd of dancing people to his friends. He gave a quick smile before sprawling on the comfortable couch.
His eyes flickered over the group, taking in each one of his friends. He rolled his eyes slightly when he saw one of Akira's girls wrapped around him, not caring at all that her already revealing skirt was riding even higher up her thigh. On Rui's other side was Soujiro, his arm around his girlfriend.
Yuki smiled at Rui before turning back to Soujiro, the two of them talking lightly to each other. Next to the now laughing Soujiro was Tsukasa... sitting next to Tsukushi. He fought back a stab of pain as she looked up, a smile on her face, hoping that she wouldn't see his weakness... his inability to hold back his love for her.
He smiled quickly, the fleeting smile so beautiful... But he refused to let her see his love. And he wiped the smile off his face once again. Then he watched as she turned back to her boyfriend, her eyes bright with love.
He leaned back, closing his eyes slowly as he watched first Soujiro and Yuki, both so content with their lives, with their love. Then he turned to Tsukasa and Tsukushi, both so obviously in love, so obviously happy. A slightly bitter smile lifted his lips as he watched Akira.
Though he knew that Akira was never truly happy with the girls he always had around him sometimes... he wished that he could find that happiness that, though there was something missing, helped. But he couldn't. He would never be able to be like Akira, with his different girl every few weeks.
Finally, he couldn't take watching them anymore. He got up quickly as Tsukasa put an arm around Tsukushi, looking down into her eyes lovingly. Quietly he said, "I have to sleep. See you guys later."
Then he left, hiding the intense pain on his face as he walked out of the bar. He climbed into his car, looking back once before starting the engine. Then he drove quickly onto the freeway, watching as the speedometer climbed steadily. 60... 70... 80... 90...
Damn it! Carefully he began to slow the car down as he began to get control on his emotions. As he pulled the car into the driveway of his mansion pictures of her ran through his head. Her laughing, so happy with him. Her face shining with a gentle smile as he kissed her gently on the cheek... Tsukushi...
I'm so scared of letting go
That the pain I've hid will show
"Rui!"
Her delighted greeting caused him to close his eyes quickly as he clenched his fists slowly. Not knowing the effect she had on him she skipped up to where he was sitting, a lighthearted look on her face. Leaning against the ledge she smiled up at him, saying cheerfully, "Good morning Rui!"
Rui lifted an eyebrow at the happy girl, asking, "Why are you so happy today?"
Tsukushi smiled and shrugged, "No reason really. I just woke up in a good mood. Maybe because the sky is so blue and the sun is so bright. And birds are singing and everything else is so bright and cheerful I can't help but be happy."
A soft smile crossed his face and he nodded before turning back to the beautiful landscape in front of him. Then, suddenly, impulsively, he said, "Tsukushi? I don't think..."
Then he trailed off, shaking his head. Tsukushi tilted her head curiously but he just replied quickly, "Never mind."
A bitter look crossed his face as he thought, 'I'm sorry Tsukasa. But I can't bear to let this go. It might hurt me to see her with you but if I didn't have this... The pain would be even more. I know I should end out times here... but I can't. I just can't. I'm sorry Tsukasa. I really am."
I know you want to hear me speak
But I'm afraid that if I start to
I'll never stop
The silence that surrounded them was surprisingly tense today... Tsukushi looked confused as she tried to start the conversation. But no matter what she said he just smiled slightly and nodded. And somehow... even though her chatter filled the air... the silence was still there.
She frowned and stopped trying to get rid of the silence. Instead she just stood next to him watching the shifting clouds, looking at him once in a while. Yet even though she was looking at him she failed to notice the pain shining in his eyes.
'I'm sorry that the silence is so stifling today. But I can't help it... Today I'm too afraid that I won't stop talking. Today I know I can't control my emotions. I'm sorry Tsukushi. Really and truly...'
I want you to know
You belong in my life
Rui listened, as, sighing, the pretty girl left, murmuring a soft goodbye. He waited until he was sure she was gone, hearing her footsteps echo in the resounding stairway. As soon as the sounds began to disappear he buried his face in his hands, his shockingly blue eyes filled with such despair.
Silently, he lifted his anguished face to the sky. Pain evident in his voice he cried out in his head. 'Why?!? When I finally realized how much you meant to me, how much a part of me, my life, you were, how much you belonged. You were someone else's. When I began to return your emotions, when I wanted you to know how much I loved you, how much you meant, you didn't want to know. You wanted to know that someone else loved you, that you meant that much to someone else... not me...'
I love the hope
I see in your eyes
Quietly, his gaze sad and wistful, he watched two birds perched in their nest near the edge of the ledge. They were both billing and cooing at each other in the sweetest fashion possibly. He winced.
Sometimes... Nature was not quite as comforting as it used to be. A wry smile on his face he looked out at the suddenly stormy sky. He watched, an expectant expression on his face, as the dark clouds began to gather and form a huge mass of gray.
He sat there, waiting, as the clouds burst, rain pouring down onto his head. He lifted his face, reveling in the simple feeling of the cold rain pounding down on him. A smile tugged at his lips as lightening struck across the sky, lighting up the dark world with a brilliant flash of white.
He sat there, watching the lightening and listening to the thunder. As the rain began to subside he smiled slightly and waited until the rain finally stopped. He watched, his eyes wide, as the sun began to shine. A beautiful rainbow spread across the sky, its vibrant colors brightening the slightly gray sky.
Slowly he took out his cell phone and punched in a familiar number. "Are you outside? Look up."
A few seconds later the door pushed open and a breathless Tsukushi looked up, awe filling her eyes. Quietly they watched the stunning rainbow until it began to fade away. Slowly the clouds disappeared with it and the sun began shining brightly once again. Almost no trace of the storm was left.
Tsukushi smiled at him lightly, her eyes sparkling with delight, "Thanks Rui. It was beautiful... I wouldn't have noticed it if you didn't call me."
Then, suddenly, her eyes were shining with hope, as if the rainbow had inspired her. As if... she'd been longing to tell him this, she said softly, "I hope... that someday my life will be as beautiful as that rainbow. I wish... I wish that my life will be as perfect as that rainbow was," then, her voice light and cheerful, she continued, "I'm sure that someday... It will be."
She flashed him a cheerful smile and then turned back to the sky, not noticing that Rui was looking at her, with an expression in his eyes that she would've never been able to explain or describe. Not in his eyes at least. It was too... foreign. But he knew exactly what it was. Love.
I'm afraid that
You will leave
As my secrets
Have been revealed
He lay on his bed, a brooding look in his eyes. He thought of Tsukushi, with her beautiful, expressive eyes, her flowing hair, her sweet smile. A slight smile crossed his lips and lingered there the whole time he was thinking of her.
'How much do you like me Tsukushi? I know that you do not love me. I know that you love Tsukasa. Yet... I just want to know if you love me enough to still be my friend, even if I tell you that I love you.'
He sighed softly, his face troubled, 'Or would you leave me... Run away and not talk to me the same way. Not look at me the same way, not laugh and smile with me anymore. I'm so afraid that you wouldn't treat me the same way... that you would... leave me.'
'Would you, Tsukushi? Would you do that? Would you hurt me that much? Because of that little thing? I think that my secret would ruin everything. You might not leave but our friendship would be so affected... I don't think I could bear it if our friendship was ruined. Yet... It's so hard not to tell you. So hard to keep it back.'
A disconsolate look on his face, the worried boy fell into a long, restless sleep, that didn't refresh him at all. Instead he was haunted by his thoughts as they swirled in his head, taunting him every second, tugging at him, distracting him.
In my dreams
You'll always stay
Every breathing moment from now
Dark brown eyes opened slowly, eyelids lifting slowly over the mesmerizing eyes. He sat up surprisingly quickly, a huge contrast to the slow opening of his eyes. His eyes darted around the room, slightly panicked. Then he relaxed and leaned against the bedpost, a resigned look on his face.
A surprising number of emotions flitted across his face, ranging from confusion to amusement. Quite suddenly his mind was filled with the pictures of his dreams from the night before. Quietly, once again calm, he sorted through them, lying down on his bed again, his hands laced behind his head.
The first one that appeared in his mind was that of the pretty girl dancing through the rain, a joyous expression on her face. Her pretty blue dress was soaked through, clinging to her, underneath the thin white sweater she had draped over it. Yet she acted as if she had not a care in the world as she spun around, water flying from her long hair.
Next she was sitting on the edge of a stair in their stairway, her long hair swept up in a simple ponytail. A peaceful look filled her face as she looked up at the blue sky. She watched quietly, as the clouds shifted in the sky, moving so excruciatingly slowly, a soft smile lighting her face.
In yet another an achingly sad look crossed her face even as a hesitant smile tugged at her lips. Her eyes were dark with emotion as she hugged him tightly, tears threatening to spill out of her eyes. Then she closed her eyes and rested her cheek on his chest, letting the tears slide out of her eyes, onto his shirt.
Then she was happy once again in the next dream, playing childishly on the beautiful beach. She patted the clean sand and gleefully ran back and forth, bringing water to make her sandcastle. Next she was holding a flower in her hands, touching the beautiful petals reverently, as if they were made of gold. She squealed as water splashed her... She laughed as someone tugged her braid... She smiled as someone hugged her. She...
Suddenly the dreams stopped as he opened his eyes abruptly, not wanting to think of it anymore. He climbed out of his bed hastily, as if wanting to get away from the place where he had thought of those things.
I cannot hold back
The truth no more
I let you wait too long
A cell phone rang abruptly, shattering the pleasant silence that had settled on the five friends. Tsukushi dug into her bag hastily, recognizing the ring. She grinned and flipped her cell phone open, answering, "Rui!"
On the other end of the line Rui smiled slightly and said quietly, "Tsukushi? I need to talk to you. Can we meet after school? At 4 in the Seraphine Café?"
Tsukushi smiled and nodded, laughing when she realized he couldn't see her. "Sure. I'll be there. See you then. Wait! Do you want to join us now? We're in the cafeteria! Where are you?"
Tsukushi laughed as she saw the tall figure leaning against a stone column, a cell phone in his hand, a slight smile playing at his lips. She quickly stowed her cell phone into her bag and got up, running over to where he was. The first thing she did was hit him lightly and say, "How could you tease me like that?"
Rui just smile serenely and walked over to the table, plopping himself down in the seat between Tsukasa and Akira. He leaned back, watching as his friends began to laugh and fall into their comfortable chatter again.
A slight smile tugged at his lips as he watched Soujiro tease his girlfriend mercilessly, grinning when she blushed. He let his eyes trail to Tsukushi and Tsukasa, who were talking carelessly to Akira, laughing at his antics. He smiled gently and realized that... as soon as he told her... everything would be normal again.
Although it's hard and scares me so
A life without you scares me more
The pretty waitress blushed as she walked the handsome man over to his seat. He sat down at the table for two by the window, his beautiful eyes trained outside. Hesitantly she asked him if he'd like anything but all she received was a quick shake of his head. Backing away slowly, she walked away towards the next customer.
A smile crept to his lips as he watched the pretty girl begin to cross the street. She was dressed in a pair of tight jeans and a white t-shirt that hugged her body. She looked beautiful. Suddenly he froze, his face terrified. He pushed his chair back hastily and ran towards the door, stopping at the door.
His breath caught in his throat as he stood at the door, watching. Everything seemed as if in slow motion. Each step she took brought her closer and closer to the speeding car, rushing towards her with frightening force.
Fear rushed through his body as he watched, his eyes filled with terror. She was still oblivious to the danger she was in. Seconds later she would be hit by the car. Then, before his brain had time to process what he was doing he ran towards her.
Every step that he took seemed to slow. As he got closer and closer he began to fear that he wouldn't make it, that she would be hit. There was no time to comprehend the thoughts that darted around in his head. All he knew was that he had to reach her.
Completely oblivious to the danger speeding towards her she was crossing the street blithely, singing lightly to herself. Suddenly a body hit her, knocking her to the side. Her eyes widened with fear as she hit the ground, hearing the terrible noise of impact. Then she closed her eyes quickly, squeezing them shut, as if to shut out the pain.
Slowly she opened her eyes as she was aware of the slight pain caused by her fall to the ground. But she was much more aware of the sticky blood covering her face. She lifted her hand to her face and wiped it away, her eyes filled with puzzlement when she couldn't find the source of the blood.
Suddenly everything came to her with startling clarity. She remembered the few seconds before the impact when someone had knocked her down and out of the way. She scrambled up quickly and her eyes darted around as she looked for the person.
She gave a pained cry when she saw the body sprawled on the unforgiving asphalt, blood covering him. She saw the car, which had spun to a stop before it hit her. But it had hit him, knocking him to the sidewalk even as he tried to hold on to her, to protect her.
For you I would fly
At least I would try
She ran over to where he was, kneeling quickly by his side, lifting his head into her lap. Around her people began to panic, yelling for the ambulance and help. All she saw and all she heard was him. His eyes fluttered weakly and he moved his lips slowly. She put a finger on them and said softly, "Don't talk. You'll hurt yourself."
She began to cry, her tears dripping onto his face. Sobbing, her voice filled with anguish, "Oh Rui. Why did you do it? Why... You should have let me die. Rui... it was my own fault. Why did you have to save me? Rui..."
He smiled weakly and lifted a hand slowly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. Taking her hand and squeezing it gently he smiled. Then he said softly, brokenly, "I did it because I love you Tsukushi. I couldn't see you die."
He shook his head when she began to protest to him talking. Quietly he said, "No... Let me talk. Please... I need you to know all of this. When I first wanted to talk to you what I wanted to say was that I love you. I really do. I know I didn't have a chance but I needed you to know that. I really did."
"I hope you and Tsukasa will have a wonderful life together. Because you two deserve it. I hope... please... remember me and know that I'm watching. I'll always be there to help you two when you need help. I'll always be there for you even when you feel like I'm not there."
"Don't feel guilty Tsukushi darling... What I did, I did because I wanted to. Because I love you and because I'd rather be hurt then see you hurt. Please enjoy your life to the fullest. Remember that you should be happy."
"Tsukushi... please... please... please... just remember that I love you."
Then his hand dropped out of hers and hit the hard asphalt. His eyes closed and a soft smile lifted his lips. Her face filled with pain and grief and she closed her eyes, not caring where she was, not caring who was there, and screamed, "Nooooo! Rui!"
For you I'll take the last flight out
"Do you, Dao Ming Si, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?"
"I do."
"Do you, Tsukushi, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
"I do."
"I pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride."
Tsukasa leaned in and pulled his new wife to him, pressing his lips to hers. As they pulled away they both turned towards a patch of sunlight. There, his features as perfect as ever, Rui stood, almost imperceptible in the bright light. They both smiled slightly and waved to him. He smiled back and nodded, then faded away into the sun.
This is a one-shot fiction that just came to my mind when I was listening to the song Last Flight Out by Plus One. It's one of the only one-shots that turned out as a one-shot! So enjoy!