A/N: Yes, yes, I know I should be working on Mess but my mind hasn't wanted to focus on it at the moment. I have a new chapter nearly completed so hopefully I can update it soon. In keeping with the holiday season a little Christmas fluffiness for you. Hope you enjoy!
Olivia's eyes opened slowly, her internal alarm having failed to wake her. She groaned as she stretched then quickly pulled the covers back up when the cool morning air hit her warm body. She turned her head to the left to see she was alone. Reaching out and feeling the slightly cool sheets she knew she must have been alone for a little bit now. Hearing a few sounds coming from down the hall she realized Alex and Noah were already up and about. Knowing her little boy was being well cared for she closed her eyes and drifted between consciousness and the dream world. She'd had a long day the day before, working much later than planned, but also wanting to make sure there would be nothing to distract her. It was Christmas Eve, and she was on a short, four day vacation. She heard Alex laugh followed by a giggle from Noah, her mind drifting over the memories of the past year.
She and Alex had been a couple now for just over a year, having begun dating just after Thanksgiving the previous year. They'd been friends for years, close friends in fact, but with an underlying tension neither was willing to acknowledge. They finally admitted to themselves, as well as one another that they were too old to pretend anymore about their feelings. They were also finally secure enough in their personal and professional lives to admit it was well. They started out slow; grabbing lunch when possible, dinner, a couple Broadway shows. Alex had met Noah once or twice before they began dating, but Olivia was very protective of her baby boy. She wanted he and Alex to get to know one another, so did the blonde, but she wanted to wait till she knew where she and Alex stood relationship wise. Alex was understanding and willing to wait. Although on Christmas she couldn't help herself and sent the little boy a couple gifts along with one for Olivia.
Olivia had gotten lost in her memories of the past year when the familiar scent of her favorite coffee blend caught her attention. She pulled on a pair of fuzzy socks, sweats and a grabbed hoodie to pull over her sleep shirt. Olivia smiled as she could detect Alex's scent on the sweatshirt, remembering the blonde had it on the night before when she came home.
Home. That was another thought that made Olivia smile. She'd always had an apartment, but she never felt she had a home. She had a place to come to between shifts, a place to sleep and occasionally eat…when she actually bothered to buy groceries. This apartment had been different though. She and Brian had tried to make it a home, and it had worked for a while, until both realized they were at different stages in life. They did love one another, but both knew it wasn't a love they could make last. Then came Noah. For the first time in her life Olivia felt like she had a home. She looked forward to the end of the day, and not just to get away from the darkness that was her job. She couldn't get home fast enough to spend time with her little boy. After she and Alex became serious, the blonde began staying over from time to time. On nights they were there together it felt even more like home. Even the few nights they'd stayed at Alex's, it still felt like home. They'd have dinner together, spend some time playing with Noah, then after putting him down for the night they'd spend time just enjoying one another. She hoped those evenings spent together could become a more permanent thing in the very near future.
Olivia stood in the hall and watched her two favorite people as they got ready to have breakfast. Alex may not be the world's greatest chef, but the blonde made the most delicious blueberry pancakes Olivia had ever had. It had quickly become a favorite of Noah's as well, leading to Alex cooking breakfast on Saturday or Sunday.
"Okay buddy, let's go wake Mama."
"Mama's already awake." Olivia stepped in to the kitchen, leaning in for a good morning kiss.
"Mama!" Noah shouted as he launched himself at his mother, barely giving the ladies time to separate.
Olivia reveled in the warmth of holding her son in her arms, then smiled as Alex wrapped an arm around them both for a hug.
Noah finally pulled back and pointed at the counter "Booberry p'ncakes Mama!"
Olivia laughed at his pronunciation "I see that! Did you make them?"
The little boy shook his head "Awex maked dem."
Olivia eyed the plate of bacon sitting on the counter "Bacon too."
Alex shrugged "You know, a little something salty to go along with the sweet."
While both ladies had hoped to spend a relatively quiet day at home both knew it would be impossible to do so with a toddler. This was the first year that Noah really understood it was Christmas and Santa would be paying him a visit. Their day was filled with questions of when was Santa coming and how many toys he was bringing.
The weekend before they had made cookies but between the three of them they didn't last long. Alex had grown up with a mom who baked all through the holiday season, and knowing Olivia hadn't, she wanted it to be something they could share. She knew the brunette wanted Noah to grow up with memories of baking cookies, of doing all the traditional things she never did as a kid.
Later that afternoon, after Noah woke from his nap they begged him to take, all three were gathered around the bar between the living room and kitchen to begin decorating their cookies. "Okay guys." Alex said as she sat down a platter of cooled gingerbread men and different shaped sugar cookies, followed by several bowls of different colors of homemade icing, sprinkles and colored sugar for decorating. "Here's the decorations for the cookies." She looked at Noah who was wearing an old t-shirt of hers over his own to protect it from the mess they knew was about to ensue. "There are no rules on how to decorate." She made eye contact with Noah, the little boy barely able to contain his excitement "You decorate them however you want."
The words barely left her mouth when Noah grabbed a candy cane shaped cookie and began spreading red and white icing on it.
"You want Mama to help?" Olivia asked.
"I do it!" he smiled.
"Alright then." Olivia said as she grabbed a Santa shaped cookie and went to work.
Alex finished stirring the homemade hot chocolate she was making, another of her mother's recipes, then looked back at mother and son. She felt her heart swell with love at watching the pair, and the fact she was allowed to be a part of their lives. She'd never considered kids when she was younger, then as she grew older she decided if it happened it happened, if not that was okay too. Then came Olivia and Noah. It didn't take long to fall in love with the brunette, and even less time to fall in love with the little boy. She had understood Olivia wanting to wait before introducing her to Noah, and while she couldn't wait to meet him she gladly respected the brunette's wishes. Noah had been abandoned enough in his early life, he didn't need to get attached to her and then their relationship end. Once they did meet though, they hit it off immediately.
As she poured their hot chocolate into mugs Alex had to hold back a laugh as she watched Olivia and Noah. Olivia was in a pair of NYPD sweats, a long-sleeve Yankees tee and her hair pulled up halfway in a clip. The brunette was concentrating on a tree shaped cookie she was decorating, her tongue sticking out slightly while her eyes focused on the sprinkles she was applying to the cookie. Noah sitting just to her left had the same look of concentration as he decorated one of the gingerbread men. He even had his head tilted slightly to the side just like his Mama. Alex grabbed her phone and took a picture of the pair. Olivia had always worried about her genes, and now worried about Noah's after finding out who his father was, but knowing how amazing the brunette turned out and now watching how Noah had picked up on her mannerisms, Alex knew he would turn out as wonderful as his Mama.
"Awex, wook!" Noah shouted as he held a cookie in the air.
Alex handed Olivia a mug of hot chocolate then smiled at the little boy "Oh my, that is the best cookie ever!" she looked at the snowman shaped cookie in his hand that was covered in red, green and white icing along with pink sugar.
"Hey Alex, look at mine!" Olivia said proudly as she held a Santa styled cookie up.
"Absolutely perfect!" the blonde said as she leaned over and kissed her girlfriend.
"Me too!" Noah leaned in close to the pair. He giggled as the ladies kissed opposite cheeks.
As they began to straighten up Olivia took note of two cookies Noah had laid off to the side. "Sweetheart, these cookies are very nice."
Noah ran over and climbed back onto the stool. He looked at them then to the ladies "Mama and Awex." He said pointing at the two gingerbread men.
Both grinned at one another as they realized one cookie had black icing for hair while the other had yellow. "You made cookies to look like me and Mama?"
"Yes." he said proudly.
Alex leaned over and kissed his nose followed by Olivia kissing the top of his head. The brunette pat his back "You are such a talented little man."
He picked up the 'Alex' cookie and handed it to Olivia then handed the 'Olivia' cookie to Alex. He smiled at the blonde "Eat Mama."
Olivia nearly spit her hot chocolate out while watching the blonde choke on hers. It was an innocent comment from her little boy but it was enough to throw them both off. Olivia smirked as she watched Alex blush slightly while trying to recover.
"Um…thank you Noah…." Alex struggled "Are you sure you don't want to save them?"
He shook his head no then looked to the brunette "Eat Awex, Mama."
Alex could tell Olivia had a witty, inappropriate remark on the tip of her tongue but held back. Even though Noah didn't talk much, especially when they weren't around, the last thing they needed was him repeating what was bound to be a comment about Olivia eating Alex.
Olivia took a bite of the gingerbread then grinned at her girlfriend "Mmm…you taste good." Earning an eye roll and shake of the head from the blonde.
By the end of the evening they had successfully worn Noah out, as well as themselves. He was still excited about Santa and fighting his bedtime but stopped once Alex told him Santa wouldn't come if he wasn't asleep. After two stories and a song from Olivia he was finally out.
They were just about to start setting out all the gifts, something that had to be left till Christmas Eve with an active and curious toddler in the house, when Olivia looked up in a panic. "I forgot batteries!"
Deciding it was time for a little revenge Alex smirked "You don't need batteries and toys now, you have me."
"Oh ha ha." Olivia grabbed her coat and slipped on her shoes "I don't hear you complaining when we use them." she leaned over and kissed a smiling Alex, the kiss lingering when Alex held her close. "I'm gonna run to the bodega down the street and grab some. That toy Noah wanted so badly requires batteries. I don't even want to imagine the fit he'll have in the morning if he can't play with it."
"I'll start setting the gifts out." Alex said as she kissed her again "Be careful, I love you."
"Love you too."
Twenty minutes later Olivia stepped back into the apartment, shaking off the cold as she undid her coat. The lights were dim, only the light from the kitchen and the glow from the tree lighting the space. She stepped further into her living room and looked for Alex, figuring the blonde must be in the bedroom. As she turned to her left her jaw dropped and her eyes widened as she looked at the tree in the corner. "Alex?"
Alex entered from the hall "Hmm?" she sat a couple more brightly wrapped gifts under the tree.
Olivia looked at the blonde then to the pile of gifts, then back to her girlfriend. "Where did all those come from?" she crouched down and looked at the name tags, some were hers but mostly Noah's. She looked up at Alex who was smiling innocently "I know I didn't buy all of these."
"It's just a few gifts for you and Noah."
"A few?" her right eyebrow raised.
"Aww…come on Liv." she pouted.
"I thought you were just gonna buy him a few gifts? That's not a few."
"So maybe I went a little overboard."
"A little?" Olivia grinned, letting the blonde know she wasn't mad.
"Okay, more than a little. I'm sorry I couldn't help myself." She smiled as she looked at the gifts then thought of Noah "I've never bought for a little kid, once I started I just couldn't help myself." She placed a hand on Olivia's hip and stepped close "They're not all for Noah." Her lips inches from the brunette's "There are a few in there for you as well."
"Oh really?"
"Mmm hmm. And I've got one I was gonna wear for you last night but since you stayed late how does tonight sound?"
"I say let's get the rest of these gifts out."
It was nearing midnight as Olivia finished brushing her teeth. They'd set out all the gifts, finished off the milk and cookies Noah left out, and she was ready to curl up next to her girlfriend and go to sleep. However she knew Alex had a surprise for her. She opened the door and stepped into her room. Instantly her mouth went dry as all the moisture flowed south. Alex was wearing a sheer negligée with a red ruffle around the bottom and across the deep v neckline. "Merry Christmas baby."
Olivia stepped over as she took in the sight "Oh my God!" she looked Alex in the eyes, the blonde seeing nothing but love and lust reflected at her "You are amazing!"
Alex did a little twirl "You like?"
"I love." Olivia pulled the blonde to her for a passionate kiss. "Can I unwrap my gift now?"
Alex nodded "And if you love this, I can't wait to see your reaction to the see thru panties that's underneath."
Olivia pushed her back on the bed, both chuckling as they landed. "I can't wait either." She said as she leaned in for another kiss.
Later as both lay curled up against one another, breaths slowing as sleep was starting to creep over them, Olivia whispered into the dark "I want us to live together."
Alex lifted her head to look over from where she was spooning the brunette "Huh?"
Olivia rolled over slightly "I said I want us to live together. I've been thinking about it for a while. I've never had such a sense of home as I do when we're all three together. We don't have to rush it, we can take our time, I just want us to start the process."
Alex smiled "Where do you want us to live?"
"I don't care. Just as long as we're together like this every night and I get to wake up to you and Noah every morning."
Alex kissed her lovingly "Okay. How about we start working it out after the first of the year?"
"Sounds perfect."
Both settled back down to go to sleep, both convinced this was going to be the best Christmas yet.
As Christmas morning broke across the city a light snow had begun to fall during the night giving them a white Christmas. They had hoped to sleep in a bit but Noah had other ideas, calling for his Mama and Awex by seven am.
Alex made the mistake of wishing him Merry Christmas when she got him from his bed which sent him into overdrive wanting to see if Santa came. They managed to keep him distracted long enough to get a few bites of breakfast but that was it. Olivia stood beside the lit tree with her phone to get her baby boy's reaction while Alex held him back. Once she was ready the blonde entered the room with him. His reaction priceless.
"Oh!" he said as he clasped his hands in front of his chest. He looked at his Mama then to the blonde "Awex!" he pointed to the tree "Wook!"
"I see!" she exclaimed. "Let's go open your gifts." The words barely left her mouth as he pulled away, ran to the corner and dropped to the floor.
The next hour was nothing short of chaos. Noah laughed and squealed with excitement over each gift he opened. Olivia and Alex did their best to open their own in between being shown each gift Noah opened.
By eight-thirty the living room floor was covered in toys, clothes, boxes and discarded wrapping paper. A year ago Alex would've done her best to keep up with the mess as the gifts were opened, but not now. Being around a small child she learned she couldn't always keep everything neat and clean, a lesson Olivia told her she'd learned as well. Alex realized the mess didn't matter, getting to watch the joy and excitement of Noah opening his gifts was far better. She now sat leaning back against one end of the couch, Olivia resting between her legs, the brunette's back against her front. They were sipping coffee while watching it snow outside. Noah had long passed out in a pile of paper in the floor, the adrenaline rush of the morning having worn off. Both were more than content to let him sleep while they enjoyed some quiet time alone.
"I gotta say," Olivia squeezed Alex's hand that was resting on her stomach "Probably one of the best Christmases ever."
"Same here."
Olivia tilted her head, a smile on her face "Thank you for my gifts, as well as everything you did for Noah." Her smile widening "But you gotta admit, you did go a little more than overboard."
Alex smiled "I tried to stop myself, I really did."
Olivia leaned up for a kiss "Just try to control yourself a little more next year."
At that Alex's smile widened "Next year?"
"Yeah, next year."
They were quiet again for a few minutes when Alex leaned forward looking at the tree "Is that…I think there's another present over there."
Olivia rose up but couldn't see it "Where?"
Alex stood and walked over, followed by the brunette "Right there." She pointed.
Olivia saw a small box tucked back a bit on one of the branches. She looked at Alex who was smiling then reached in for the box. It was wrapped in sliver paper with a red ribbon. She unwrapped it, unsure why she suddenly had a funny feeling in her stomach, the feeling increasing though when the paper revealed the familiar blue of a Tiffany box. She looked to Alex who was still smiling but there was a hint of something else in her eyes, a mix of nervousness and excitement maybe. Her hands were shaky now, it was all she could do not to drop the box. Olivia gasped as she opened it to see a platinum band with a diamond setting and two smaller diamonds on either side. Tears began filling her eyes as she watched Alex drop to one knee and take her still shaking free hand.
"Olivia," Alex whispered, the emotion evident in her voice as the reality that she was proposing to the love of her life sank in "I don't know how to put into words how much you mean to me, how special you are to me. We've known one another for over fifteen years, friends for almost all of it. There was always this feeling I had for you deep down but I couldn't figure out what it was." She took a moment to clear her throat and regain control. Both were so wrapped up in the moment they didn't realize Noah had woke and was now watching them "Now, after being together for the last year I know what that feeling was. Do you remember the first time we met?" Olivia smiled through her tears and nodded, Alex smiling in return "I remember walking into the squad room one morning and you were sitting at your desk. I didn't realize it at the time but when I saw you, I fell in love. And you smiled because you knew."
A fresh round of tears escaped Olivia's eyes, as she used the hand holding the ring box to try and swipe them away with her forearm.
Alex quickly wiped her own tears but it was no use. She reached up and took Olivia's hand that was holding the box and took the ring. "Olivia Benson I love you with all my heart, and I'll love you till the day I die. Would you give me the greatest honor in the world of being your wife? Will you marry me?"
Olivia began nodding, her voice failing her briefly before finally answering in a whisper "Yes, Alex. Yes I will marry you."
A small sob escaped them both as Alex slipped the ring on her finger. Before Alex could stand and kiss her new fiancé the brunette dropped to the floor and pulled her in for a hug. They simply held one another for a moment before finally sharing their first kiss as an engaged couple.
Noah walked over and gently placed his hand on Olivia's cheek "Mama?"
They pulled apart, gently wiping one another's tears as they began to laugh. Olivia looked to her left and saw the look of concern on her baby's face. "Sweetie, what's the matter?"
"Mama cry." He turned to Alex, looking as if he was near tears himself "Awex cry."
Alex wrapped an arm around him and pulled him between them, both realizing he didn't understand the situation. "Oh no baby, it's okay. Mama and I are just very happy." She smiled at him. "Sometimes people cry when they're really happy."
"Mama happy?" he looked up inquisitively.
Olivia nodded as a few more tears escaped "Mama is very happy Noah." She held her hand out to him and he looked at her ring. "Mama and Alex are gonna get married." 'I'm getting married!' she thought to herself.
"'Kay." His three year old brain not quite comprehending what married meant.
Both grinned at how unimpressed he was by the situation. "Mama and I are gonna be together forever." Alex smiled as more tears filled her eyes.
"Happy?" Noah asked her.
"I'm very happy sweetheart."
He looked to Olivia "Mama happy?"
"I am." she nodded. "I'm so happy." She ran her hand over the top of his head "Are you happy, Noah?"
"Yes." he replied before taking off to play with his new toys.
Olivia stood and looked out at the falling snow, the held up her left hand and admired her ring. "Alex, it's perfect."
"Just like you." the blonde said as she wrapped her arm around Olivia's waist.
Olivia blushed slightly at the compliment "It had to cost a fortune."
"I didn't even consider the price Liv. All I knew was that I would know your ring when I saw it, and when I saw this one I knew I wanted you to wear it the rest of our lives."
She reached down and took Alex's left hand in her own "I have to get you one, you need a ring." She smiled "I can't have people thinking you are available."
"I can't wait." She kissed the brunette's neck "I can't wait for you to slip that ring on my finger, and I can't wait to walk down the aisle, to make you mine, to become yours forever."
They curled back up on the couch and watched Noah as he continued to play. The little boy so excited will all his new toys he couldn't stick with one for very long, bouncing back and forth between them all.
"So," Alex asked as she wrapped her arms tighter around her fiancé "Do you still think I went overboard this year?"
Olivia laughed "Well…it'll definitely be hard to top this next year." She tilted her head back for a kiss "Yeah, you did go overboard but I'm willing to let it slide." A tear slipping down her cheek "Especially since it's for our little boy."
It took everything Alex had to hold it together. She loved Noah as if her were her own, in her heart and mind he was her little boy even if he wasn't officially. But to hear Olivia refer to him as their son made her heart swell more than she thought was possible. "There's nothing I wouldn't do for our little boy, for either of you."
That night as they tucked Noah in Olivia kissed his forehead before opening the book he'd chose "So did you have a good Christmas?"
"Uh huh." He looked at both ladies "You?"
Olivia nodded "It was the best."
Alex smiled "Best Christmas ever."
As they settled in on opposite sides of the sleepy little boy they felt a contentment neither had ever felt. They knew they would have many more wonderful Christmases to come as a family, but they would always look back on this one with particular fondness. Their first Christmas of forever.
A/N: I used a little Shakespeare quote in Alex's proposal. Alex seems like the type to be well versed in Shakespeare, right? To any and all celebrating, Merry Christmas!