Sirius followed the stream of people going into king's cross station, hoping to lose his family as quickly as possible. His family seemed to share the sentiment. From the very moment they entered platform 93/4 his mother began glancing at her watch and his father gave him a new variation of a speech he'd heard every day for eleven years. 'You must not dishonor the family name' was now joined by 'Attending Hogwart is a privilege, and privileges can be taken away', 'We will not hesitate to bring you home if you cause any trouble', and the unspoken understanding that he better make it into Slytherin or at least Ravenclaw.
Soon his father was done and he was free to board the train and his family was free to leave. The only one of the who wasn't relieved that it was over was Regulus. He had enjoyed the experience and sorely wished that it was his year to go to Hogwarts, and to bring the family honor. Sirius almost wished that he felt like that. That he was more like Regulus, that he wouldn't cause problems or break things or talk back, that he was his mother's little darling and his father's favorite son. But in the same breath he knew it wasn't possible. There was something wrong with him. There had to be. He was broken, deficient, a disgrace waiting to happen. Oh God, what was wrong with him?
He found himself on a train completely devoid of all life. He laughed. How appropriate that he should be the first on the train. He would choose a compartment, stow away his luggage and settle in all before his compatriots were finished saying goodbye to their families. Soon others began to trickle in. By virtue of knowing very few Hogwarts student, and disliking the ones he knew, Sirius assumed that he would be sitting alone. He made the mistake of overestimating the size of the train and underestimating the extroverted tenacity and wiley willpower of one James Potter.
Sirius had taken to observing the first few who trickled into the train after him. There was a plump blond boy passing his compartment. Of course, after passing Sirius's compartment the plump boy must have said something to the wild haired boy he was following wide mouthed through the train's corridor, presumably about the near emptiness of Sirius's compartment. The boy with the unruly hair nodded. He was beaming with a sort of confidant glee that was more contagious than malaria in a swamp. The plump boy was like a fly drawn to a lamp. They opened the sliding glass door and tumbled into Sirius life, and his compartment.
After wild headed boy, who was called 'James Potter' took his seat he introduced himself and the other boy, 'Peter Pettigrew', who then kindly asked for Sirius's name. He gave it, albeit a bit sullenly. "I'm Sirius," he said wondering if the omission of his last name would garner any questions. Peter was too polite to say anything, and James… he couldn't help himself.
"You can't be serious!" James tried to deadpan. He made it all the way to the word 'be' before he crumbled into peales of laughter. His laughter was so purely genuine and downright joyous that Sirius wasn't offended at all. Little did James know that he was the first to survive making a jab at the name of Sirius Black without so much as a bloody nose.
"Oh, but I am," said Sirius, who felt his spirits lifting. "Seriously".
James smiled deviously, "I think i'm going to like you".
Peter grinned and turned to James. "Are you serious?" he asked with mock offence.
"No! No, mate you've got it all messed up!" said James beaming at Peter with surprise and a little bit of pride. "I'm not Sirius, he's Sirius. I'm James and you're Peter."
The conversation continued on much in the same vein, each pun more ridiculous than the last.
Just as no one seemed to be able to come up with another name related joke, a sallow little boy drowning in his oversized wizard robes, and a tearful little redheaded girl popped into their compartment. Sirius knew that the boy would have been on the train much earlier, maybe even before himself had it not been for the girl. He filed the information away for further use and returned to his conversation until he heard the boy say
"You'd better be in Slytherin".
The boy's voice morphed into that of Sirius's father's and sent shivers down his spine.
"Slytherin?" said the girl. She was a muggle born then.
"Who wants to be in Slytherin? I think I'd leave, wouldn't you?" said James to Sirius obviously hoping to get a laugh.
It didn't work. Sirius was crushed. "My whole family have been in Slytherin," he said.
James looked surprised. "Blimey," he said "and I thought you seemed all right!"
Sirius grinned. He hated his family. "Maybe I'll break the tradition." and to deflect from further questioning he continued "Where are you heading, if you've got the choice?"
James lifted an invisible sword. "Gryffindor, where dwell the brave at heart! Like my dad."
The pasty boy made a small, disparaging noise. James turned on him.
"Got a problem with that?" James was glowering. With a slight chuckle Sirius recalled the outrage he could milk from Regulus by make the same sort of noise when he talked about Slytherin.
"No," said the sneering boy, who the girl had called 'Sev'. "If you'd rather be brawny than brainy".
Jumping to James's defense Sirius quipped, "Where're you hoping to go, seeing as you're neither?" In his opinion 'Sev' was a little too big for his britches. Metaphorically, of course. In all actuality his britches were too big for him.
James roared with laughter. The girl, who until this point had done relatively little, sat up, rather flushed, and looked from James to Sirius in dislike.
"Come on, Severus, let's find another compartment," She said with distaste.
"See ya, Snivellus!" said James as the compartment door slammed shut. "Good bye and good riddance I always say."
"Snivellus? That's a good one," said Peter enthusiastically.
Sirius frowned. "Did you really mean what you said earlier? About Gryffindor?"
"Of course! Gryffindor is the only place for one such as me!" James said playfully.
Sirius frowned. Gryffindor... That was off limits.
Remus sat In a boat with two other eleven year olds. If he remembered right their names were 'Mary' and 'Alice'. He couldn't remember which one was which, but he didn't suppose it mattered much. He didn't really need to know anyone's name. He was going to Hogwarts to learn, not to make friends. Making friends was dangerous. His father had told him a million times, either they'd find out and hate him, or he would bite them and hate himself. No… it was better to be quiet. That way, even if he did bite someone, at least it wouldn't be someone he knew. He hoped that not knowing them would make it better.
"Black, Sirius".
A boy with dark eyes stepped out of the line of first-years. He was everything anyone expected of a Black. He was proud, defiant, and haughty. No one expected to see any different. He was 'just another Black' until the hat cried, 'Gryffindor' and then if they looked close they could see the fear in his eyes.
"Lupin, Remus"
It wasn't hard to see the fear in this one's eyes. He was terrified. It was an intellectual fear, one that had permeated his entire being and left him shaking. The funny thing was his fear didn't leave after he'd been sorted. It stayed with him as he made his way to the Gryffindor table, and even when the feast appeared he was still terrified.
"Pettigrew, Peter"
He was a boy on a mission. He would have been content anywhere the hat had thought to put him until he met James Potter. Now, there was no where but Gryffindor for him. Determinedly he sat on the stool, fiercely bargaining with the hat, and triumphantly he made his way to the Gryffindor's table where Sirius was already waiting for him. He gave little thought to the hats cryptic warnings. How could Gryffindor be his ruin if all his friends were there?
"Potter, James"
"GRYFFINDOR" cried the hat, and James practically bounded over to his waiting friends.
"Did you see it? I must'a been the fastest sorting of the night" he boasted.
"I don't think the hat even touched your head!" said Peter.
"It makes sense," said Sirius. "You had your mind made up."
The red-headed girl from the train huffed. "And you didn't?"
"No, I didn't." Sirius said glibly. "I had my heart set on Hufflepuff, but i'm just too chivalrous and brave to make it a day in there".
She rolled her eyes.
"Oh come on. Just because you didn't make it into Slytherin with your little boy friend doesn't mean you have to take it out on us," said James. He thought he was being clever, and besides he was right. She shouldn't be so huffy with Sirius. Couldn't she see he was trying to make her laugh?
The girl's eyes teared up, but she didn't cry, which surprised James. Most girls cried. What surprised him even more was the venom in her voice when she told him what an arrogant prat he was and that it wasn't his business, but Severus wasn't her boyfriend. The last bit excited him. He smiled at her. "Snivellus probably is too afraid to ask you. Look at him over there he's staring you down like a-"
He was cut off short by a biting pain on his cheek as her hand collided with his face. "You leave me alone James Potter! You leave us both alone, you horrible, horrible boy!".
James glared at her, cheek stinging, and vowed to hate Lilly Evans for the rest of his life.
Remus listened to the conversations around him. The hustle and bustle of the excited Gryffindors was like a cloud of joy. Hogwarts sure was wonderful.
He was still sitting beside Mary. She had curly brown hair and a motor mouth that just wouldn't stop. This suited Remus just fine.
"... It's a shame that Alice was put in Hufflepuff, she's my best friend y'know, and I was really hoping we would be in the same house, so we could spend more time together y'know, but i'm happy for her because it's such a good fit y'know.."
Remus was learning to tune her out, which he felt guilty about, but honestly, who uses 'Y'know' that many times?
Her constant flow of conversation was interrupted by a red headed first year sitting between them and introducing herself. "Hello, my names Lilly,"she said. She seemed shaken but it was clear that she didn't want to talk about it.
"Hullo. I'm Remus," he said offering his hand.
"And I'm Mary!" said Mary enthusiastically. "I was just telling Remus here about my friend Alice who's in Hufflepuff, she's in our year, and I was hoping we'd be in the same house, but-"
"I have a friend in another house, too," said Lilly. "It doesn't mean they can't be your friend anymore".
Mary wrinkled her nose. "but I won't get to see her as much...," she whined.
"Yes, but we can make new friends," said Lilly. "not to replace them, but to be with when we can't be with them". She smiled. "so what do you say?"
Mary grinned. "Absolutely! Remus?" she looked at him expectantly.
His resolve shook. "I'll be your friend," he said and he meant it too.
"Well, she sure stormed off real quick," said Peter.
Sirius smiled at him. "Yup, but I don't think James wants to talk about that right now".
Peter nodded. James did seem a little on edge. "Yeah. Well what do you think he would want to talk about?"
"Guys? I'm right here," said James.
"You are aren't you?" asked Sirius.
"Well? What do you want to talk about?" asked Peter.
"The headmaster!" said James.
"The Headmaster?" said Sirius and Peter.
"He's giving a speech!" said James.
And so he was. The Headmaster at the time was one Albus Dumbledore. Under the assumption that the reader is already familiar with him I will summarize my description of him to 'oddly wonderful'. That certainly is how he appeared to the boys. After the speech food appeared and then disappeared down the gullets of hundreds of hungry witches and wizards. After the feast the Gryffindor Prefect lead the first year's under his care up to a portrait of a rather voluptuous woman.
"Alright, I don't want any funny business, so here's how it's going to be- boys on the left, girls on the right! Got it? The password is purgamentum anas, and it'll be that for a while, so don't forget it. Any questions?"
The other prefect tut-tut-ed disapprovingly. "Al, you're scaring them! The poor little dears are practically trembling!" she said.
"Lexington, nice is just another word for soft. If I don't scare them they'll misbehave" said Al, and then to the first years he said, "Go on now. Your trunks are in your dormitories."
Lilly looked to Remus. "I guess we leave you here".
"It's okay," he said.
"Bye-bye Remus!" said Marry, her curls bouncing up and down. "Y'know you don't talk much. you should talk more!"
"I'll take that into consideration".
"She's right, you really are too quiet" said Lilly. "See you tomorrow, Remus".
"See you tomorrow." He watched as they went up the stairs to the right, and then he himself went up the stairs to the left.
The other tenants of his dormitory were already lounging in there respective beds when he entered.
"Hullo mate! I'm James, and these are Peter and Sirius," said the boy on the bed closest to the door. He gestured to the other two as he spoke and they waved in turn.
"I'm Remus"
James was beaming. "Remus? That's a strange name. Mind you it's not as strange as 'Sirius'. He even spells it funny. S-I-R-I-U-S."
"Like the Star," said Remus.
"Yes, exactly," said Sirius, who was rather over this whole business about his name. "Like the star."
"You're named after a star?" asked Peter, who was named after his great-grandfather.
"That's kinda girly, mate," said James.
Sirius glowered at them from his four poster. "I have no issues with my-"
He was cut off as the door opened and the prefect 'Al' stepped in and said, "Remus Lupin?"
"Yes sir?" asked Remus.
"Professor Dumbledore wants to see you. He did say why, but he did say that you're not in trouble".
Remus nodded. He'd been expecting this.
After he left the others sat in silence for all of twenty seconds until James said, "Whoa! he must'a done something really bad to get called to the Headmaster's office the first night!".
Remus, meanwhile, knocked three times on Dumbledore's door.
"Come in, my boy," said the wizard inside. His eyes twinkled, biding Remus to come closer.
He swallowed. "Sir? I can't thank you enough. I know you didn't have to let me come and I'm really very grateful. I promise that-"
"Really Mr. Lupin it's not necessary to thank me so heartily. It's my honor to teach every student willing to learn, and to accommodate any particularity they might have," He peered over the tops of his glasses. "But, as you may have guessed, your situation requires much responsibility on your part as well as mine."
Remus nodded. "Yes sir!"
"Do you know when the next full moon is?"
"Sunday, four days from now".
"And the next?"
Remus knew this one too. "October 4th".
"And the next?"s?
Remus squinted in concentration. "November 3rd?"
Dumbledore shook his great head. "No, my boy. November 2nd. Keep a calender from now on."
"Yes sir."
"Understand that I don't mean to be harsh. However, if you make a mistake it could cost someones life. Yes?"
"Yes," Remus completely understood the implications of his condition.
Dumbledore twinkled at him at him again. "This is too heavy for a boy your age to have to bear. You shouldn't have to worry about life and death. I wish- No wishing won't help now," he said sadly. "Yes, I fear that in these dark times children must grow old before their time. Now, about Sunday..."
Remus listened attentively as Dumbledore detailed his plan, involving a 'whomping willow' and a haunted mansion.
When he returned to the dormitory the others were still waiting for him.
"What was that all about?" asked Peter.
"I'm not allowed to say," said Remus, praying that they wouldn't press the issue.
"Oooh it's classified!" said James. "He must be a spy or something! If he told us he'd have to kill us! He's going on a mission to save the world, or England at least! No wonder he doesn't say much; it's because he has so many secrets!"
Remus found himself wondering what a conversation between Mary and James would be like. He shuddered.
Peter sighed merrily. Breakfast had been glorious, and now he had Herbology with his three new best friends! He soon found that for first years 'Herbology' meant rooting around in the dirt trying to tell magical moss from regular moss. They had separated into groups of three, and while Peter had been sad for Remus, he was secretly glad that they hadn't decided that he wasn't going to be part of the trio. Remus had left to form a group with two girls, and James, Sirius and Peter got busy collecting moss samples.
"I bet there really is no difference between magic moss and normal moss," said James glumly.
"There's got to be!" said Sirius. "Maybe it's a weight difference?"
"Maybe, Remus would know. He seemed pretty smart," suggested Peter.
"Shhh! He's with that girl from yesterday!" said Sirius.
"Right. James doesn't like her," said Peter. "Got'cha".
"Guys. I can hear you. I'm right here," said James.
"Right."
"So you are."
James raised his eyebrows. "What am I going to do with you to?"
"Help us figure out these mosses?" suggested Peter.
"Yup," said Sirius. "I bet it's a weight difference."
"Do we have a way to test that?" asked James.
"Nope."
"Probably not."
"Ugh," said James. "I hate moss".
"I knew it! There was a slight color differentiation!" said Lilly triumphantly.
"But we still need to figure out which color represents the magical moss," pointed out Remus.
"Guys? The slate green one shimmers if you hold it up to the light!"
"Good catch, Mary!" said Lilly. "Does the forest green one shimmer too?"
"No! it doesn't!" said Remus.
"We did it! We did it!" celebrated Mary.
"We're the first ones," said Lilly.
"You guys are the smartest in the class!" said Mary.
"You're smart, too," said Remus. "Don't leave yourself out".
"He speaks!" squealed Mary in delight, and before he could point out that he had spoken before, the class was over, and everyone was headed to lunch.
Remus could feel the moon sickness creeping up in his blood. Three days until the full moon. He ached all over. Two days until the full moon. He couldn't breathe and his joints were sore. The day of. He could barley move and his head throbbed. After he endured his way through the day, he managed to drag his way to the tree that tried to kill him and down a passage way until he blacked out.
When he woke he was sore and groggy, and he knew, oh he knew that it would hurt for a few hours, hurt worse than it had before, but it would soon pass and it would be gone. Gone for an entire month.
"Where's Remus?" asked Sirius when the boys awoke Monday morning.
"Perhaps he went down to breakfast early," suggested Peter.
"No... He never came to bed last night," said Sirius.
"He's a super spy, remember?" said James playfully. "But, really. I don't think he'll want us snooping around in his business".
"Yeah, probably," said Peter. "You're probably right."
Happy Birthday to my Padfoot! (I'm a bit late aren't I dear?). This story can also serve as a Christmas present for you and Prongsy. If you are not my Prongs or my Padfoot, (or even if you are) I hope you enjoy this! For those of you who are reading my other fics fear not I am not abandoning them! please do not give up hope!
Anything underlined is straight from good old JK herself.
Please tell me if anyone is ooc! Peter worries me...
Ps. First person to comment gets a shout out in the next chapter!
Love, RoseAlone, AKA 'Mooney'.
Merry Christmas!