This is a dialogue I had to write for my Literature class- we're studying dialogues- and yeah. My dear friend Star encouraged me to post it here, so I did. Note: It's very out of character for him, very in character for me.

It's about 1 PM on a Saturday in November at the mall, and CAROLINE has just gotten her Panda Express (2 parts orange chicken, 1 part fried rice) and is searching for a place to sit. She finally approaches VOLDEMORT (who is dressed in a long, black cloak and looking particularly menacing), who is across from the only empty space- due to excavation in the food court, there isn't much choice.

CAROLINE: … You know, Halloween was a few weeks ago.

VOLDEMORT: I am aware.

CAROLINE: Okay, no need to be mean about it… [checks phone, reads text message] OH I LOVE HIM.

VOLDEMORT: …

CAROLINE: Well, I do. He's my best friend. Don't you love your friends?

VOLDEMORT: No.

CAROLINE: That's because you don't have friends, isn't it? LAWLZ JAY KAY.

VOLDEMORT: Actually, I don't.

CAROLINE: Oh. I'm sorry… I'll be your friend!

VOLDEMORT: I'd rather not.

CAROLINE: Love is amazing. Why are you so opposed to it?

VOLDEMORT: I'm not.

CAROLINE: Then why---

VOLDEMORT: One cannot be opposed to something that doesn't exist.

CAROLINE: You don't think love exists?

VOLDEMORT: I know it doesn't exist. It's an illusion created by the weak to rationalize silly thoughts and actions.

CAROLINE: … You can't mean that.

VOLDEMORT: I can and I do.

CAROLINE: No, you don't.

VOLDEMORT: You're really trying my patience.

CAROLINE: I'm sorry, but I just don't understand how you could have gotten so old- no offense- without having love to get you through the hard times.

VOLDEMORT: Love is weakness. It's a trifling matter. If I wish to persevere, it's merely a matter of willpower.

CAROLINE: And where does your willpower come from?

VOLDEMORT: Myself. My mind.

CAROLINE: No, I mean, what's the motivation for it? Why should you fight for any cause in particular, and not another?

VOLDEMORT: To further the human race. To gain power. To do what is in my own best interest.

CAROLINE: So you love yourself?

VOLDEMORT: I better myself. I value myself. But it has nothing to do with that futile emotion you call love.

CAROLINE: How would you define love, then?

VOLDEMORT: An emotion. A very pointless emotion that people use as an excuse for most everything these days.

CAROLINE: Well. Perhaps it's an emotion. But then to what do you attribute the fact that people die for others?

VOLDEMORT: It's a silly notion of heroism, and nothing more.

CAROLINE: I don't think so. If one's sole focus was to better oneself by appearing to be a hero, one would want to stay alive to reap the benefits of any action made, wouldn't they?

VOLDEMORT: Not necessarily. Some believe death is inevitable, or have nothing really to live for.

CAROLINE: I think everyone knows that death is inevitable. Well, unless you go around putting pieces of your soul into inanimate objects, but that's not an option most people have.

VOLDEMORT: That doesn't mean there's any love behind the action of dying. What about people who die for complete strangers?

CAROLINE: We're not talking about them. We're talking about people who deliberately give their lives for people who they value.

VOLDEMORT: Then how would you define love?

CAROLINE: Love is, in very general terms, a willingness to sacrifice without expecting anything in return.

VOLDEMORT: Right. Then what's the motivation to love?

CAROLINE: Well. Usually you do get something back, I just meant that you don't ask anything in return.

VOLDEMORT: And you believe that this is an important emotion? Even if it is only one that, as far as I can see, only leads to the one feeling the emotion to give up things for someone who may or may not reciprocate this love?

CAROLINE: Well yes, it's important. If you think about it, without love, the world would be a very empty and depressing place to live in. If all we ever thought about was ourselves, and we never looked to help anyone else, it would be anarchy.

VOLDEMORT: I suppose I can agree that anarchy is not a favourable form of government, but that doesn't mean "love" is necessary to avoid it.

CAROLINE: What's a ruler who doesn't love his subjects? How much loyalty do you think the subjects will have if their leader is only interested in himself? And that's not even beginning to approach the subject that is the love of a cause--

VOLDEMORT: So you attribute most everything in this world to love, do you?

CAROLINE: Everything good. I mean, God—

VOLDEMORT: I don't believe in God. Don't drag your religion into this.

CAROLINE: Alright, then.

VOLDEMORT: I still believe that this love business is merely another term for weakness.

CAROLINE: In a sense, you might be able to say that. Well, so far as, a person who loves is concerned- really, truly loves, not this canned lie you see in the movies or whatever- the object of love is the one thing that the person would give anything to better, or preserve, or what have you.

VOLDEMORT: I don't believe or practice love, and yet I did everything in my power to preserve my own life. How do you explain that?

CAROLINE: Easily. You loved your life, even if you didn't realize it.

VOLDEMORT: So that boy you were talking about, the one who communicated to you in that little box? You would give up anything for his sake?

CAROLINE: Yeah, pretty much.

VOLDEMORT: And he doesn't take advantage of this fact?

CAROLINE: Not intentionally.

VOLDEMORT: I find that hard to believe.

CAROLINE: Just because you're an egoist doesn't mean we all are.

VOLDEMORT: I'm getting tired of this conversation. You're just a silly little girl.

CAROLINE: At least I'm not a selfish excuse for a human being who has no fashion sense!

VOLDEMORT: You're pathetic. [stands]

CAROLINE: Whatever. You know, there are plenty of stores here where you can find better things to wear than that tacky cloak.

VOLDEMORT: I'm not even going to grace that with a response. [leaves]