AN: My first fan fic. Please be nice.
Disclaimer: Just in case there is a question in anyone's mind I Do Not Own these characters. As much as I wish I did, they are owned by Stephanie Meyers. I'm just having a little fun.
Bewitched
"I was really creeped-out when I heard about Quil imprinting on a toddler. But our infant daughter…" Bella raged, pacing up and down the room. "Her free will was taken from her before she was an hour old. "This is…" she paused, searching for words to express the displeasure she felt, "so completely wrong on so many levels."
"I know, Love, believe me." Edward replied, hoping to sooth his newborn vampire wife before her temper got out of control.
"We can't just accept this! There has to be something we can do to. I mean… He's always here! Always playing with OUR baby! It's unnatural! When we move is he planning on coming too?
"I am furious about too." As much as Edward disliked the situation, he'd had a few more days to come to terms with it. "But what can we do? I considered ripping his head off when I found out; and honestly, I just might if I was sure it would help. But for all I know, Reneesme is stuck with this imprint forever, regardless of whether or not Jacob is alive.
"If it continues like this much longer maybe Rose will take care of him," Edward continued, chuckling.
"If this continues much longer, I might help her!" Bella grumbled.
Edward started to reply, but Bella held up her hand to stop him. "I know he didn't deliberately choose Reneesme. Somehow that doesn't help." Bella complained her face a mask of fury.
"Look, Rose has been doing some research. There aren't any tribal legends about removing an imprint. Carlisle says there is nothing he can think of medically that can be done, and honestly we've been more concerned about the rate at which she is aging. We can try separating them and see what happens – maybe it will fade somewhat… We may just have to live with this, at least for the time being," he sighed.
"Urrggh!" Bella screamed in frustration. "
"Maybe we could try an exorcist," Edward joked, still trying to lighten the mood.
"Funny… funny…" Bella said. "How about a witch-doctor?!"
"Oh, I've got it," she continued, starting to sound slightly hysterical. "How about this! 'Calling Dr. Bombay, calling Dr. Bombay. Emergency! Come right away!'"*
Both of them froze, slack-jawed and wide-eyed when an older man dressed for scuba-diving, complete with mask, air tanks and spear-gun suddenly materialized, dripping, on the living room floor of their cottage.
Removing his mouth-piece he said, "you called me at very inopportune time. I was just about to spear 'the big one'". Ha! Well, I'm here now. Where is the patient?"
THE END
AN: Seventeen year old Jacob imprinting on newborn Reneesme is something that has bothered me since I read BD, so I just had to get this out. I have no idea what Dr. Bombay might do to remedy the situation. If you are familiar with Bewitched, he often bungled things anyway. But I am hopeful that in this slightly AU he will come up with a cure. Don't hate me Team Jacob – I wish him well, but I think the baby should have a choice. This is my first fan fiction (and very likely my last), so please be nice. Thanks for reading.
*Calling Dr. Bombay quote and Dr. Bombay himself are from the 1960's TV series, BEWITCHED.