Glitter in the Air.

Chapter 1

[Note; Trigger warning. Please be careful of reading this story. It revolves around self-harm, suicidal thoughts, and violence.]

It's been said that everyone has their breaking point. Everyone reaches their limits. Everyone gets to that point where they just can't handle it anymore. Where the pain and sadness is just too much.

For Blaine Anderson, that was a long time ago.

He'd been okay for months. Or, so he'd told himself. He was watched over by his friends, and other Warblers and he'd been fine. He hadn't thought about that in a long time. He hadn't gnoe near anything like that. Not since the first few months after he'd gotten to Dalton. That was a year ago.

But, then again. That was a year ago. He'd grown up since then. Things changed. A new school, new glee club. New boyfriend. It was all so different than it used to be. He'd tranfered to Mckinley to be with Kurt. His Kurt. His heart and soul and his everythin when Kurt had said that he wanted their senior year to be perfect and that he had wanted to see Blaine more, well, he was quick to make the transfer.

But then there was Finn. Cutting him down as soon as he entered the choir room. And every day after when ever he opened his mouth to talk.

The worst pat was, no one even noticed. No one spoke up against it. Even Kurt only looked at him with sympathy. Nothing changed. It got worse. And this is why he went to Dalton in the first place, because of these people who would cut him down and make him feel worthless. This is why he'd started— No.

Then there came Sebastian Smythe. Who snaked his way into Blaine's life and under Kurt's skin. He could tell Kurt didn't like the other boy, from the moment they met at the Lima Bean. And when the went to Scandals Kurt voiced those opinions. But Blaine, ever the optimist, shrugged it off and tried to tell Kurt that he wasn't that bad.

Looking back at it now he wished he had listened. That he had turned tail and run. That he had listened to Kurt and not had even gone dancing. Hadn't gotten drunk and danced with Sebastian all night. Hadn't— God. Hadn't begged Kurt to sleep with him in the back of his car, claiming that it was 'all about them' and that it 'didn't matter where they did it'.

He was such an idiot. And the long walk home hadn't helped. He had ended up going up to his room and well— no. He couldn't think about that. He couldn't. He promised himself when he started dating Kurt he wouldn't do that anymore.

But he'd failed him. Just liked he'd failed that dance move. He couldn't believe he had down that. He had drilled it into his mind and body for weeks. He had been sure it was pracitcally muscle memory by the time the curtains rose. But it hadn't. He'd failed. He'd failed the cast, the audience and most of all himself.

Then there was Kurt. Sweet, beautiful, flawless Kurt. Coming to find him after the show and telling him everything was okay between them and that he wanted to go to Blaine's house. He trusted Blaine again. Enough to do that. In that very moment he felt his heart flutter and his brain melt and his breath catch in his throat. He couldn't believe it. Kurt was back and loving him and he hadn't lost him.

That's all he had thought this week. This whole week. He'd screwed up. He'd lost Kurt forever. Kurt hated him. He had too.

But here Kurt was, hands on his shoulders with a warm reassuring pressure and he wanted to spend the night with Blaine. He wanted to do that. With him of all people in the world.

"Ok." He said, his voice low and emotional and he couldn't believe he had been so stupid.

Everything was going fine, more than fine, perfectly. He was stradling Kurt and kissing him deeply, passionatly. Sure, they had made out before, but this was so much more, hands allowed to roam and Kurt's own shirt was off before his own. Mostly because he couldn't let Kurt see. Not yet. He was too nervous. Too broken.

"Mhhhhm." Kurt groaned, pulling away from Blaine for a second so their eyes met, "As much as I love this, Blaine, your shirt really needs to go." He said, hands grasping the hem of Blaine's shirt and pushing it up and Blaine realized it was now or never. Kurt trusted him, he had to trust Kurt back.

Honey-hazel eyes closed when Kurt managed get his shirt off and he heard the other teen gasp softly. "B- Blaine." He heard his boyfriend breathe, and he couldn't open his eyes. He could just imagine how sad and concerned Kurt would look. How heartbroken he'd be.

"Blaine, hun. Look at me. Please." Kurt whispered, reaching up to cup Blaine's cheeks even though he was on the verge of tears himself. He didn't understand. Why was Blaine hurting so much that he had to resort to that. "P- please." He cursed himself when his voice cracked. He couldn't imagine Blaine alone in his bathroom— no.

Moments passed, then minutes, and maybe even hours before Blaine cracked open his eyes to look at Kurt and the way he was looking at him was horrible. He couldn't figure out why Blaine was so crushed. He didn't know what he was scared of. Kurt still loved him just as much. Maybe even more. He just—he wanted to know what's wrong.

The onyx-haired teen crawled back, off of Kurt and he shook his head. He looked so hurt and scared and it broke Kurt's heart and he sa up to look at the boy who was trying to get away from him, looking at anything but Kurt. "G- go…" Blaine whispered, his voice crakcing and so full of hurt that it made Kurt's breath catch. He couldn't stand seeing Blaine this hurt. No.

"Blaine—" he reached out a steady hand, not caring that he was half undressed and it should look ridicuolous. He was worried about Blaine.

"Get. Out!" Blaine snapped, swatting his boyfriends arm away in a fit of rage. Not at Kurt, but at himself. Kurt didn't know that, though, and his glasz eyes went wide and his mouth parted a little in shock and he just didn't understand. His own body was shaking at the tone of Blaine's voice and the hatred in his eyes and Kurt's eyes water.

"Leave, Kurt."

And that was that.