Emmett's mind.
I can't stand this anymore why anyone doesn't wanna play with me!!! "Shut up EMMETT!" Alice dragged all the girls shopping for a whole weekend me jazzy can annoy Edward mmm… unicorns…. Back on track Emmett back on track. "FLUFFY PILLOWS ARE THE BEST!!! I KNOW EDDYPOO LIKES THEM!!!" "EMMETT!" "yayaya shut up me shut up." "Thank you I will be going to the store to buy nessie things. In about a hour." "Okay whatever you eddyki-." "don't call me that!"
15MIN. LATER.
MUWAWHAHAWA Edward went hunting so now me and jasper can have al little fun with eddypoo.!
"oh jazzykins." He rolled his eyes no one appreciates my pet names. *sigh* Fluffy Unicorns!! Shut up Emmett shut up! Jazz was watching hashish loser I mean one time Esme suggested we go on that and I'm like no way we have a doctor right in the house man sometime I feel a lot smarticle than her. "hahahahah these people have such retarded emotions!" "Yaya how bout we mess with eddies little mind!" "Im up for that." "Excellent."
"Heres our list"
JASPER SINGS HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL IN HIS MIND WHILE PRETENDING TO BE TROY BOLTON.
I GET IN ONE OF ROSALIE'S 'PRETTY DRESSES' AND START SINGING SANTA BABY WHILE LAYING ON HIS PIANO.
WE WILL TAKE OUT A FEW SCREWS IN THE VOLVO SO IT DOESN'T WORK THEN SAY "DARN MAN, YOU GOTTA TAKE THE ASTON MARTIN."
PAINT THE VOLVO NEON GREEN WITH 'SEXY BELLA' ON THE HOOD.
THEN WE'LL SAY THAT JACOB DID IT AND LOVES NESSIE A LOT.
THEN JACOB WILL SAY THAT SETH DID IT
WHEN HE TRIES TO KILL SETH WE WILL TELL LEAH.
THEN LEAH WILL TAKE CARE OF THE REST
WHEN HE COMES HOME WE START SINGING OPERA MUSIC IN OUR MIND WHILE PRETENDING TO STRIP OLD WOMAN
"now lets call Mr. black shall we?" "We shall." Jasper agreed. "FLUFFY UNICORNS! DAMN I GOTTA STOP SAYING THAT!" we called Jacob, 234-wolf. "What bloodsucker?" "Look who woke up on the wrong side today now does my favorite mutt want a treat or what?"
"Edward is home start now Jasper." (jasper pov) just cut to the chase. I don't know where to go the right team I want my own thing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want my own thing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can't choose im so confused ! whats it all mean!!!!!!!? I WANT MY OWN DREAM SO BAD I GONNA SCREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH!!! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that was the best tree minute scream in my life!! " jasper!!!!" Uh oh. "that's right you mite wanna scream!"
Back to emmetts pov!
Wow I look great!! Now the pian o I go! I wore rosalie's prom dress from like a few years ago. Jasper made his way to the piano where Edward stopped. Here's go nothing.
"SANTA BABY SLIP A SABLE UNDER THE TREE FOR ME. IVE BEEN A AWFUL GOOD GIRL SANTA BABY AND HURRY DOWN THE CHIMNET TONITE!" JASPER WAS SWAYING TO THE MUSIC AND EDWARD MOUTH THE DROPPING. My favorite part! "SANTA BABY THERES JUST ONE MORE THING A RING I MEAN NOT FRO THE PHONE SANTA BABY SO HURRY DOWN THE CHIMNEY TONITE SO HURRY DOWN THE CHIMNEY TONITE!" then I winked damn.
Eddys pov.
I cant believe those retards singing all that crap. I got in the Volvo. You got to be kidding me. 'Emmett Jasper!!!!" "WHAT?" "my car. I swear we had nothing to do with it we were rehearsing our little gig." Jasper said calmly. "fine." "damn man, you gotta take the Aston martin." "fine." I got in the car when I left Emmett was thinkingabout fluffy unicorns and him prancing around the meadow with corndogs… jasper thinking about how the carbroke he was vlaming Jacob. *Edward is home now* " HOLY SHIT! MY CAR!" my car was neon green with a hot picture of bella I have obviously not hidden anymore! They came running to the garage. "what did you guys do?" I asked calmy Emmett was thinking having his car neon orange with rose on the hood with a sexy rose on the hood "shut up Emmett!" "Jasper care to explain." "Well this is what happened we went hunting because Emmett wanted to show the animal his dress and then I heard something but I didn't bother to go back to the house so here we are now with one explanation the only person who knows cars really good besides rose is Jacob back." "Now start your car and see if it works." It works, amazing. "So I suggest you call Jacob and err tell him-." "THAT NESSIE WAS POSSESSES BY FLUFFY UNICORNS EATING CORNDOGS!!!" "Or you can say she is hurt." Wow. "Thank you boys I will go with jaspers plan."
Emmett's pov.
"no want a kettle dog! Jazzy please!!" "One Emmett we don't eat two it was corndog."
"fine." I grumbled I went to the frig. Corn dogs why do they call them corndogs? "Oh jazzykins!?" "What?" he was fixing his hair. "Why do they call the corndogs?" "Dunno, corn made of dogs or corn made of dogs." "Oh you're so smart." I patted his head. "Err. Thanks I think?" I went to the kitchen prancing like an elephant on a stage with daffodils and roses and light made out of corndogs. Edward pulled in im afraid OMG!! I GOTTA PEE!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!! Wait I don't pee silly me! hey that rhymes! I'm afraid you know what er I gonna run to Vancouver and leave jasper all alone yaw that right cause im a man! I left a really heart breaking note:
My fellow family members:
WENT TOVANCOUVER TO PEE!
p.s. we don't pee! * giggle giggle*
