Joey: Well now, yes, I started TP, but I couldn't wait any longer to start WW either, so here we go.
Mike: Can I do the disclaimer?
Joey: You know I'm lazy, you don't have to ask, go ahead.
Mike: Disclaimer: Joey does not own Zelda or anything really… he has no money.
Joey: Thanks… Now, Onto the Story!
My Version of Wind Waker: Chapter 1
(Black screen, Justin Joey Fangz and Nick walk in from off screen)
Joey: (Holding a sheet of music and turns to Justin and Fangz)
Justin: (pulls a violin out of nowhere)
Fangz: (Does the same accept a bass guitar)
Joey: (looks at fangz, then at the music sheet) Hey, there's no bass guitar part…
Fangz: There is now… Why aren't you playing too?
Joey: Well, its kind of hard to play an instrument with one hand (holds up arm cannon)
Fangz: Oh right…
Joey: (raises hand to conduct)
(Everyone starts playing the Story theme for Wind Waker and nick holds up cue cards which have the story lines written on them)
Nick: (holds up a cue card that says "And Nick saved the day")
Joey: (stops conducting) No nick… you didn't…
Nick: (holds up another that says "Nick… and his sidekicks")
Joey: Damn it nick!
Justin: Oh screw this. (a holographic keyboard appears and Justin starts playing the Zelda Remix)
Joey: Oh goddamn it! Fuck it, lets just get to outset (snaps and everyone vanishes)
Outset Island
Aryll: (comes out of the house) Brother! (Walks towards the bridge)
(Just before Aryll reaches the bridge she is stuck by a bolt of lightning, Joey Fangz and Justin are standing around Aryll, who is face down on the ground and scorched black)
Fangz: (hair is standing up in all different directions) There has got to be a less conspicuous way to travel…
(A giant Yacht pulls up to the island, the ramp slams down into the sand and nick walks down the ramp)
Joey: yea… real inconspicuous
Nick: What? This is my small Yacht!
Joey: Its bigger than the island!!!
Nick: So?
Joey: (sighs) Well we should go get link…
Nick: Why bother?
Joey: It's the point of the story genius.
Nick: Oh yea…
Joey: (snaps and Link appears in midair, asleep, and falls on top of Aryll)
Link: Umph! (Sits up) Wha?!
Joey: Ah yea, I forgot just how short link was in this game… (Places his foot on top of links head and poses like Captain Morgan)
Everybody's got a little Captain in them!
Joey: What the hell?! Where did that come from?!
Justin: (coughs) Sorry!
Joey: Weird…
Justin: So, what's the theme of this story?
Joey: Theme? Umm, its Zelda dumbass
Justin: No, I mean an on going joke or something along those lines…
Joey: oh yea… I got something kinda funny… (Snaps)
Link: (Pajamas turn pink and he grows boobs)
Justin: … you made link a girl? That's it?!
Joey: I think its pretty funny!
Link: AHH!! Its gone!!! (Panics)
Fangz: Wait… what did you do?!
Joey: Well, I made link a girl…
Nick: (scoots towards Link)
Fangz: (leans over to look at link) And this advances the plot how? Are… are those… E?!
Link: (smirks) Jealous?
Joey: Fangz is jealous?! (Snaps and Fangz has Es)
Fangz: Gah! (Falls forwards) MY BACK! (Bounces back up) Gimme my old ones back!
Joey: Oh fine, kill all the fun… (Snaps and fangz is back to normal and link has more a realistic chest size)
Fangz: (Breathes)
Link: Well, I guess this isn't so bad… (Pokes her boobs) heh… awesome… oh! I should get home! Today is-
Joey, Nick, Justin, Fangz: (in unison) Your birthday.
Link: Yea… you guys are creepy (picks up Arylls telescope) I can pawn this later. (Starts walking to her grandmothers house)
Nick: (scoots up to link again) Would you like some "Ting"?
Joey: Shhh nick not yet! The readers won't get the joke!
(They arrive at grandmas house)
Link: Hey grandma, I'm home!
Grandma: Link! Here, I have this green tunic for you, you gotta wear it because its your birthday. (Whispers) fag…
Link: Yea… umm I don't think so…
Fangz: Alright, hold him down… (cracks knuckles)
Joey: You mean her, right?
Fangz: Whatever!
(Everyone tackles link and a cartoon cloud fight appears, when the smoke clears link is wearing the Heroes Clothes)
Link: Gah, what the hell… these are kind of tight…
Joey: Well those were designed for a male… (Snaps and links tunic is now pink)
Link: (sighs) it fits better… but just because I'm a girl now doesn't mean I like pink…
Joey: Yea, but its funny.
Mike: Just change her back or she wont stop nagging.
Joey: Whatever (snaps and the tunic is green)
Link: Much better.
Grandma: Well, you should go get your sister, its going to be time to eat soon.
Joey: I'm sure she's still face down in the sand.
(Everyone exits the house)
Nick: Hmm, I notice that links grandma didn't seem to care that link was a chick, oh hey, I notice that your suit is different now Joey, is it the real one?
Joey: (in the PED suit I haven't played Metroid Prime 3 yet so I don't know of any of the other suits Yea, it is.
Nick: So she's pissed again isn't she?
Joey: (smirks under the visor) Yea she is.
(If this is the first of my stories you have read, you should know that I steal Samus's power suits on a constant basis)
Link: (is ahead of the group kicking Arylls unconscious body in the kidney) Wake up!
Joey: That's real effective.
(A large shadow of a bird passes by)
Link: What the hell… (pulls out the telescope and looks up to see the Helmaroc
King) Holy shit that's huge bird! Wait… he's got a girl! (Thought bubble appears above links head Girl + Rescue Sex)
Nick: (reading links thought bubble) ooh lesbianism
Link: What are we waiting for?
Joey: And just how, may I ask, are you going to get the girl from the birds talons?
Link: Oh damn… Didn't think about that…
Joey: Yea, that seems pretty common in your family… (Watches as the pirate ship lobs cannonballs at the bird) Wow… a catapult… THEY ARE PIRATES FOR FUCKS SAKE! WHERE'S THE CANNON!?
(every single shot misses)
Joey: Wow… morons… (Arm cannon switches to Annihilator Beam and he charges it up and aims at the Helmaroc King)
Link: What's he doing?
Fangz: He's probably going to blow something up…
Joey: (Fires the Sonic Boom at the Helmaroc King)
Helmaroc King: (screeches loudly, his faceplate cracks and he drops Tetra into the forest on top of the island)
Link: Whoa… nice shot!
Joey: Thank you…
Nick: (leans over to fangz and whispers) The suit aims for him.
Joey: Hey! I heard that!
Justin: (talking in a zombie like tone) Link… you will need a weapon, go to Orcas house and acquire a sword. (Falls over backwards) sugar sugar sugar sugar (continues to repeat)
Link: Is he okay?
Joey Nick and Fangz: No.
Link: Well, lets go get me a sword then?
Joey: And your going to listen to this psychopath?
Link: Yeap
Joey: Wow, I thought you were smart…
Nick: Well at least they are getting better compared to OOTs link.
Joey: Yea.
(Link steps up to Orcas door and everyone else follows)
End Chapter 1
Joey: Well now, its about time I started Wind Waker, I'm skipping MM so I can come up with more ideas. But for now, leave a review, please, no flames.