Fic Title: Broken (13,900 words)
Author: Moonpattern,
Fandom: CSI
Pairing: Grissom/Sara
Date: November 2004
Feedback: I'll take feedback
Rating: (R sexual references/violence/mature subjects)
Disclaimer: "This is not meant to be taken as true, I make no $$$ . . .")
Summary: An unexpected situation makes feelings arise.
Dedications: Thanks to my friends Theresa and Amy for urging me on and my wonderful bets, Alicia.
Broken
I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph; I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain
'Cause I'm broken when I'm open
And I don't feel like I am strong enough
'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel light when you're gone away
The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There's so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain
'Cause I'm broken when I'm open
And I don't feel like I am strong enough
'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away
'Cause I'm broken when I'm open
And I don't feel like I am strong enough
'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel light when you're gone away
That song just about made her cry, to listen to the words, it was almost as if it was written for her, about her feelings, how could someone else have known? Was it that obvious?
Just his mere presences made her heart skip a beat. She just wished that he felt the same way. It was all too painful for her to be near him, feeling the way she did without any feelings back from him. The more she thought about it, the more the decision became more and more obvious.
She had tried everything; even asking him out and that got her nowhere, just further and further into her pool of rejection. She had to come up with a new idea and fast. Either something had to be done, or she had to leave, and as the tears pooled in her eyes, she realized that leaving, no matter how hard, might be the easiest option.
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"Grissom, can I talk to you?" Sara asked as she approached his office.
"Sure, Sara, What do you want?" He asked as he looked over his glasses.
"I was wondering if you would write me a recommendation?' she asked not quite knowing what his response was going to be.
"Recommendation?" he asked thinking to himself, Recommendation? For a job? Say something Gil, before it is too late!
"Yes, you know for a job?"
Oh shit, he thought, was she planning on leaving? On leaving him? He thought for a minute and answered her quietly, "Sure, Sara, who do I write it to?" he asked hoping to gain some insight.
"Just write it generic for right now, I have just begun my search." She said as she walked away
"Okay!" he answered hoping she didn't hear the disappointment in his voice.
Grissom sat there wondering what he could do to stop her, this was probably his fault anyway, he had recommended Nick for the promotion instead of Sara, even though she was a wonderful CSI, did an amazing job...He shook his head, he had to be professional about this, he was, after all, her supervisor, he had to write this letter and be very objective about it. If she wanted a letter of recommendation, she would get just that!
He sat down in front of his computer and began to write:
To whom it may concernThis letter is with reference to Sara Sidle. She has been an employee of mine....
He stopped and hit delete, who was he kidding, himself, she was more than an employee, he just had to convince himself of that. He minimized the computer screen and got up and walked away.
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Grissom walked into the break room and saw his employees sitting there awaiting their fate for the evening. They were his employees, or at least most of them, he didn't picture Warrick in a sexual nature, or Nick, or Greg, he didn't even picture Catherine that way, and he had known her the longest, no he only pictured one of them that way, Sara, and he just had to figure out how to get over his apprehensions.
Grissom shook his head and tried to regain focus and began handing out assignments. "Nick, you and Greg have a DB in Lake Mead, Brass is waiting for you!"
"Come on Newbie, we got us a floater!" Nick said motioning to Greg to leave.
"Floater? That doesn't sound good, Should I be scared of this alleged "floater"?" Greg stated as he stood up.
The two boys left and Grissom turned to Catherine and gave her the assignment. "Cath, you an Warrick have a suspicious situation at the casino, we don't know if something went on, but they can't rule it out without you guys."
"Great Griss! We love this kind of job!" Catherine said with a hint of sarcasm.
"Well, there is blood spatter, does that make it more interesting?" Grissom asked.
"Very!" Catherine said as she grabbed the file and fled the room.
"Sara, that leaves you and me, "Grissom said looking at Sara, "We have a body with bugs, in the dessert!"
"Yeah, that's original!" Sara said with sarcasm.
Grissom thought to himself that he had to talk to her tonight, no matter what, before she made a harsh decision to leave him for good.
Sara walked beside Grissom as they approached the crime scene. They could see the people standing around the body. Grissom picked up the pace to make sure nobody got near the body.
"Alright everyone, this is a crime scene, I want everybody to leave except for me and CSI Sidle." Grissom said with an abrupt tone.
Grissom got down and inspected the body. It was infested with maggots, and dung beetles. The body had been there for at least a couple of days and it was their job to figure out how long, how they got there and who put it there.
"Sara, could you come here and start taking some pictures, please, before I start collecting the bugs." Grissom said as he stood up. "We have a few minutes before David gets here to pronounce."
Sara took out her camera and started snapping pictures of the body. The body was a female, about 25 years old, give or take, she was pretty, or at least she was before she died. She was a petite brunette and it looked as though she was wearing army fatigues.
"Grissom, come look at this?" Sara asked as she snapped more pictures.
"What did you find Sara?" he asked as he approached her leaning over the body, Grissom stopped for a minute and inhaled something, her scent, the smell that was Sara, he slipped into daydream mode and began to think of a happy life with Sara, loving him unconditionally, forever...
"Grissom, you ok?" Sara asked as she looked at Grissom.
"Yeah, I just had a thought," he said as he tried to hide his crimson complexion, "but what did you want to show me?"
"Aren't those army fatigues this girl is wearing?" Sara asked pointing at the dirty green pants and matching shirt the girl was wearing.
"Yeah, they are, but we will be able to better judge when we get everything back to the lab" he said as he looked up and saw David approaching.
David looked down at the body and commented, "Yup, she is dead! I guess we should get her back to the lab so we can find out who this is."
Grissom and Sara nodded in agreement as they proceeded to examine the body and the crime scene, Grissom began collecting bugs as Sara investigated the scene around the body and collected evidence.
The coroner came and collected the body to take it to the lab for Doc to examine it; hopefully by the time they got back he would have some insight into what happened.
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Sara followed Grissom to the SUV and opened the door as she got in the vehicle to head back to the lab. Grissom got in and started the vehicle. The drive began in silence when Grissom looked over at Sara and decided to break the silence.
"Sara, you ok?" Grissom asked with a bit of concern in his voice.
"I'm ok, just a bit tired is all," she said as she stared out into the darkness of the Las Vegas dessert.
"Sara, do you need some time off?" Grissom asked.
"No! I'll be ok, I just need some coffee, that's all, haven't had my quota yet." She said with a sheepish grin.
That grin nearly sent Grissom into a tale spin; she would never know what she did to him.
"Sara, can we talk?" Grissom asked not even knowing what was coming from his lips.
"Griss, we are talking, aren't we?" she asked.
"Yes...no, that's not what I meant, can we. ...talk...about..us?" he stuttered the words out of his mouth.
"Us Grissom? What us, there is no us, it is just you and me; a subordinate and her supervisor, because you have never made any attempt to be anything more!" Sara spat out at him.
Grissom pulled the SUV over onto the side of the road, put it in gear and turned the engine off. He looked over at Sara who wouldn't look at him. "Sara," he asked softly, "Sara, will you look at me, please?" he pleaded.
"Why Grissom, so you can see me make a fool of myself once again, God Grissom, I am not stupid! I got the clues, you want nothing to do with me outside of work, and I got that, finally! Why do you think I want to find a new job, working with you is too hard on me, look at me I am a wreck! I don't sleep, I barely eat, and I survive on coffee. It is not healthy, I can't take it anymore!" Sara was in full blown crying mode, sobbing hard. Grissom took his hand and began to wipe the tears from her face. She threw his hand away.
"Stop, Grissom, you don't want this, just admit it, I have stopped lying to myself thinking that there may be something there!"
Grissom took her hand and placed it on his chest so she could feel his rapidly beating heart.
"Sara, feel that? This is what you do to me? Do you understand this? I get all flustered and the only thing I know how to do is run and put up a wall so I don't have to deal with it." Grissom stated as he held her hand on his chest.
He took his hand and placed it on her face, wiping the flowing tears off her face when she gave in to his touch.
"Grissom...will you kiss me?" Sara asked.
"I'm not sure if I should," he said. "If I do, there is no turning back, I will be in, hook, line and sinker!"
"And that's a bad thing," she didn't have time to think before he leaned in and kissed her, just gently at first and then it became more and more intense, headlights approaching made them break their stance and come back to reality.
The vehicle stopped and somebody got out and approached the window. "Is everything alright sir?" the man asked as Grissom rolled down the window.
""Yes, we are fine, we just pulled over because I dropped something, thanks for stopping though." Grissom said as he rolled up the window.
He was sure that the guy didn't buy his story, but he was a stranger, what did it matter to him?Grissom retraced the events of the last fifteen minutes in his head, he had just kissed Sara, now what? She was silent. Did she regret it? Was he too late? The thoughts came swarming into his head as Sara turned and spoke.
"Griss," She mumbled softly, "Griss, are you sorry about what just happened?"
"Are you?" he asked.
"I asked you first." She added.
"I'm not sorry.... Its just.." he stopped.
"Jesus Grissom," she spat, "Why do I even bother!"
"No Sara, it's not like that, it's just, what now, what do we do. I don't exactly have much to offer you, what about work, it is just.... complicated." he said as he took her face in his hand.
Sara was putty in his hands and he knew it. "Griss, I know what you have to offer me, you have more to offer me than you think, I have felt this way since I met you, no matter what, I can't shake it, that's why I wanted to leave, it would have made it easier for me, so I wouldn't have to long for you with no affection in return."
"Sara, it is not like that at all," he said, "I have wanted you for sometime, but I didn't figure I had anything to offer you, I am old, set in my ways, and I am not exactly the most exciting guy you could meet." He looked at her before he spoke again, "Sara, you are young, beautiful, you have a life ahead of you that you can live, I don't want you to look back and wonder what you missed out on because of me."
"Griss, you are not old, and in case you haven't noticed, you excite me, bugs and all. I'm old enough to decide what I want and I'm afraid to tell you that it is you!" Sara choked back the tears, " I want you Grissom, flaws and all"
Grissom put the SUV in gear to head back to the lab when a thought crossed his mind, "Sara, what are we gonna do about this when we get back to work?"
"Sara?" he questioned and then looked over to see Sara fast asleep in the passenger seat of the SUV.
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"Hey Doc, "Grissom quizzed as he walked into the morgue, "What do we know about our vic?"
"Let's see," Doc began as he rolled closer to the body. "She has been dead for a while, but I'm sure you and your little bug friends will reveal that." Doc rolled towards the head of the victim, "She died from blunt force trauma to the right cortex of the brain, you can see that from this contusion on the right side of her head, she got hit by something with some force."
"Hey Griss," Sara said as she walked into the morgue, "We have an ID on our Vic, Samantha Owens, 24, originally from Iowa. She joined the military 2 years ago." Sara said looking at the paper, "The military print all their people, we also tested her with a rape kit, it was positive for intercourse, but no seamen was present, he must have worn a condom, it is hard to say if it was rape, did you find any defensive wounds?"
"There are really no defensive wounds that I can see," said Doc, "but you are more than willing to have a look for something I may have missed."
"Griss, I'm gonna go and review our evidence." Sara stated as she began to walk out of the morgue.
"Alright Sara," Grissom said, "I will catch up with you in a couple of minutes."
Grissom's heart nearly stopped when Sara walked out of the morgue, he could still smell her scent lingering all around him, the smell of Sara.
Grissom looked at the body once more and left to find Sara to review the evidence. They didn't have much to go on and this being a possible rape case, he knew it was going to be hard on Sara.
"Sara," Grissom asked, "Do you want me to assign someone else to handle this case?"
"No Griss, I'm fine!"
"So what do we got?" he asked.
"We Id'ed our Vic, she has had sex recently, we're not sure if it was rape, or consensual. We found her dead and covered with bugs. That about sums it up, care to add anything Grissom?"
"Do we have anymore evidence?" he asked
"No, not really," she replied, "but I'm going to double check everything and see what I find. Brass is checking into her life, her friends and etc. to see if everything checks out."
"Hey Griss, what do you make of this?" Sara asked looking into the microscope at the small piece of white fabric. Grissom came close, inhaling her scent and looked into the microscope.
"I'm not sure, it looks like cloth, take it to trace and see if they can get anything on it."
"Grissom, you do realize we need to talk...I mean about what happened...we need to talk about it...or are we just ignoring it?"
"Not now Sara, not here!"
"Alright Grissom," she spat as she got up to walk away, "I should have known it was too good to be true! I'm taking this to Trace and then I'm going home, shift ended a half hour ago!"
"Sara!" Grissom called after her, but it was too late, she was out of sight.
Gil...now what! He thought to himself, you have got to do something or you are going to lose her...and this time it will be forever!
Grissom sat alone in his Townhouse thinking to himself about the predicament he had gotten himself into. Meanwhile, across town, Sara sat in her apartment with her head in her hands crying.
I should have known! She thought to herself, It was too good to be true, I should have known, God Sara you are so stupid! Suddenly the phone rang and broke Sara's concentration."Hello!"
"Sara?" a faint voice asked.
"Yes Grissom, What do you want?"
"Sara, we need to talk, can I come over?"
"Why Grissom?" She asked, "So you can confuse me even more?"
"No Sara, so that we can sort this out...this thing between us!"
"What thing Grissom?" she choked out, "Why don't you just leave me alone until I can find a new job!" and with that she hung up the phone.
Grissom sat there for a minute and decided to go over anyway, she was already mad, it wasn't as if she would get madder. He got on his shoes and coat and left his townhouse and headed across town towards Sara's apartment. He decided to stop on the way over and get her some breakfast and maybe some flowers....
Sara threw the phone across the room. Jesus Grissom! Why do you do this to me? Why do I let you do this to me? I am so stupid! With that she threw on her shoes, grabbed her car keys and started out the front door.
Grissom pulled his SUV up beside Sara's and got out of the vehicle whistling a happy tune as he opened the back door to retrieve his purchases. He looked down proudly at his gifts, fruit muffins, herbal tea and a beautiful bouquet of lilies. He walked towards the staircase with a spring in his step when he noticed something at the bottom of the staircase, a person....Sara!
Grissom ran towards the lifeless body lying at the bottom of the stairs and opened his cell phone and dialled 911. "This is Gil Grissom, I'm at CSI Sara Sidle's apartment, it is 323 East Navaho Road, she is lying unconscious at the bottom of the stairs, please hurry!" With that Grissom knelt down beside Sara. "Sara...Sara honey...Sara can you hear me?" Grissom pleaded.
He gently tapped he face rubbing his fingers through her hair when his fingers touched something wet. He pulled his hand up to see what the liquid was. It was blood...Sara's blood.
The paramedics arrived and packed Sara into the ambulance to take her to the hospital. Grissom looked down at his purchases, left them on the ground, picked up the keys to her car and followed the ambulance to the hospital in his SUV.
At the hospital Grissom paced back and forth waiting for some word...any word on Sara's condition.
Jesus Gil, this is your fault! If you weren't so God damn scared to show your feelings this would have never happened. Now Sara, your Sara is hurt, injured, God knows how badly and it is your entire fault. Nothing had better happen to her or you will never be able to live with yourself!
"Mr Grissom?" A young nurse asked.
"Yes." He stammered, "Is she ok?"
"Well, Mr Grissom, she sustained a head injury, a serious concussion, a few broken ribs, a fractured wrist and some bumps and bruises. From the look of it, she took a nasty spill down some stairs."
"Can I see her?"
"I guess so, but not for long, she needs her rest!"
Grissom walked into the room, he saw a very still Sara hooked up to machines wrapped up like a present. He approached her and took her non-bandaged hand into his hand and held it to his face. He placed a gentle kiss on her hand and leaned down and hissed her forehead. Her eyes opened up and began to focus.
"Sara honey, can you hear me?"
"Griss..." came choked words.
"Sara...don't talk, save your energy, I just want you to listen to me, this is all my fault, Sara, I'm so sorry, if I wasn't so stupid, and so scared of my own feelings, this would have never happened!"
"Griss..."
"Ssh Sara! Don't say anything!"
"Grissom, what happened?" she asked, "The last thing I remember was getting off the phone with you, being angry, stepping out of my apartment and waking up here."
"Sara, it seems you took a nasty fall down the stairs, you have a concussion, some broken ribs, a fractured wrist and some bumps and bruises...and it is all my fault!"
"Grissom, it is not your fault, I am the one who did this to myself. Besides, how did you get here, did they call you again?"
"No Sara, I didn't want to take no for an answer, I was coming over to talk to you when I found you lifeless at the bottom of the stairs."
"If I wasn't such an idiot you wouldn't be here, hurt and injured. I was coming over with breakfast and flowers so that I could tell you how much I care about you, I care about you Sara, I have for a long time, I was scared when I got the call about your DUI, and now this, I am not sure I can take much more!"
"Grissom it is pretty sad that it takes me nearly killing myself for you to realize your feelings!" Sara chuckled and then winced at the pain.
"You have to be careful, I'm going to go back to the lab and let the others know what happened and re-assign your open case to someone else."
"Griss...don't go, please stay with me!" Sara pleaded.
"Alright, but let me call the lab."
"Ok Griss, but hurry back!"
"Hey Catherine, I'm at the hospital with Sara, she had an accident...no Catherine, she is ok, sore and banged up, but ok. Can you cover for me tonight? I got no sleep, I have been here all day...oh and Cath, can you give our case to Nick or Warrick? Yes Cath, I will keep you posted." Grissom returned to Sara's room.
Grissom walked in and saw Sara sleeping so he went over, pulled up a chair and held her good hand as he collected her thoughts.
The night he got the call about her DUI he was so scared he had lost her and now this.
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"Mr Grissom, would you like a blanket or something?" the nurse asked looking at Grissom. He realized he had fallen asleep with his head on Sara's hand.
"No thanks," he stated, "I didn't mean to fall asleep. How is she?" he motioned to Sara.
"She will be fine, a bit sore, but I'm sure she will be allowed to go home tomorrow." The nurse turned and left.
Sara stirred and began to wake up, "Griss, you still here?" Sara said reaching for his hand.
"Sara, I'm right here."
"Grissom, come sit with me, please, I don't want to be alone right now."
"Sara, you are not alone, I'm here."
"But I want your arms around me, to touch me, so that I know you are here, please Griss, humor me."
"All right Sara!" he said getting close to her.
"Griss, I want you to climb into this bed with me and hold me, please Griss."
"But Sara, it is a hospital bed!"
"So, come on, I'll move over."
Sara moved over and Grissom crawled in bed behind her and she cuddled up next to him as he wrapped his arms around her. She fell into a rested slumber. Grissom could smell her hair, the same smell he smelled nearly everyday, the same smell that drove him crazy and right now Sara, his Sara was lying in his arms sleeping. Grissom eventually joined her in slumber. The nurses walked in and saw their arrangement and left them until morning.
Grissom moved to turn around, nearly impossible with two people in a hospital bed, he woke up Sara. "Grissom...you are not leaving me, are you?"
"No Sara, I'm just trying to turn around, go back to sleep honey, you need the rest."
"As long as you are here beside me I could sleep all day!" she said as she snuggled in closer to him.
Grissom leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her cheek when she began to mumble, Griss...I love... and she was asleep again, but he knew what she meant, and he felt the same way.
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It was only a few hours before the doctor arrived to re-check Sara's condition. Grissom crawled out of the bed so that the doctor could examine her, Sara protested, "No Griss, don't leave!"
"Sara, the doctor needs to examine you to see if you are any better than before. It is ok, I will be just outside."
No Griss, please stay! Doc is it ok if he stays?"
"The doctor nodded, "Ms Sidle, if it is alright with you, I personally don't have a problem with it."
"Well Ms Sidle," the doctor began, "You took a nasty spill, but you were a very lucky girl."
"Can I go home?"
"You can leave the hospital, but I don't want you staying alone for a couple of days and I don't want you anywhere near those stairs, agreed!"
"She can come home with me!" Grissom piped in not even knowing where that came from, "I don't have stairs and she will not be alone, I will see to that!"
The doctor went and got her release papers and they signed her out into Grissom's care. "Ms Sidle, I do want to see you in a couple of days, and no work for the rest of the week, ok?" Sara nodded in agreement.
Grissom took Sara's things and packed her into the SUV and took her to his townhouse. He opened the door and led her into his modest apartment and placed her in the room he called his spare room.
"Sara, make yourself at home, I need to make a phone call and then I will show you around."
With that Grissom left and Sara was in the room alone. Grissom's house, I'm in his house. Sara thought to herself. For a man, he kept his house in a very tidy order, it was very Grissom of him, and she had known he would be an immaculate housekeeper. The sparse furnishings in this room showed her that this room didn't get used much. He was a very private person and she figured that he didn't get a whole lot of company, let alone any visitors for any length of time.
"Catherine, just left the hospital, Sara is going to be off for the rest of the week. I won't be in either; I have that entomology conference this week and then the weekend off, so I will be back in on Monday night. I am not sure when Sara will be back. Do the best you can, haul somebody in off swing or day shift if you have to. By the way, how is that case doing?"
"If we get any leads, Griss, I will let you know. Tell Sara we are thinking about her, where is she anyhow, in case we want to come visit?"
"She is with a friend, apparently, but I was assured she would be ok." He said trying not to be obvious.
Catherine thought to herself, Sara has friends? Who would have thought that? And she hung up the phone from their conversation.
"Hey Dave, this is Gil Grissom," as he began to walk back to Sara's room, "Hey listen, something has come up and I won't be able to attend the conference, let me know how it pans out, yes, thanks Dave." And with that Grissom shut the phone and walked into Sara's room.
"Hey Sara," he asked as he approached her, "Do you want the grand tour?"
"Sure Grissom," she said as he took her arm and walked out of the room.
As he walked down the hall he showed her where the bathroom was, barely decorated with shaving stuff on the counter and dark colors, very Grissom of him she thought. The next room was his bedroom and it was decorated with big old furniture and there were many bugs in clear boxes plastered all over the walls. The next room was the living room that held a large leather sofa and a small television. The living room led to the kitchen and that was where the front of the townhouse was.
"Well Sara," Grissom asked, "Do you like my house?"
"It is very you!" she said.
Grissom all of a sudden felt very uncomfortable in his own house. Sara was here, of all people, Sara. Grissom didn't know what to do; he was silent, and walked towards the sofa to sit down. Sara came over and sat down beside him. Grissom's heart skipped a beat when she sat beside him. He could smell her; it was driving him crazy!
"Sara, you should be resting," Grissom said as he got up off the couch, "Come on, I'll get you tucked in and I think I will go to bed too, its been a long day."
"Grissom, I am not tired, I have been sleeping all day!" she protested.
"Sara, you were released into my care, now come on, you need your rest!"
Knowing she would not win this argument she got up and headed towards her room.
"Griss, I have nothing to sleep in, I only have the clothes on my back."
Grissom disappeared and returned with a large t-shirt and a pair of shorts. "Here, you can change into this, it should be comfortable for you." Sara took it and walked toward the bathroom to change.
Grissom knocked on the door, "Sara, if you want to take a shower, the towels are under the sink, just help yourself to whatever you can find."
"Ok Griss, I think I am gonna do that, thanks!"
Grissom went and sat on the couch and started to read a boring book to get his mind off of her, off of Sara. A long time passed when Grissom realized that the shower hadn't stopped, and Sara was still in the bathroom, Grissom got concerned and ran to the bathroom.
"Sara...Sara are you ok?"
"Griss, can you help me, please?"
With that Grissom opened the door and entered the bathroom with Sara. She was standing in the shower, completely naked with a head full of soap. "Griss, you gotta help me, I have a head full of soap and I only have the full use of one hand, this isn't easy!" Grissom had his hands over his eyes and had all he could do to not laugh at the comment Sara made. "It is so not funny Grissom! Stop laughing at me and help me, help me damnit! This water is freezing, I used the last of the hot water at least 10 minutes ago, and I am freezing and I have soap in my hair!" Sara was crying and Grissom approached her.
"Sara, honey, calm down, stop crying, I will help you just give me a second, can you at least put a towel on or something!"
"Does my appearance disgust you or something Grissom? I know I am bruised and battered, but am I really that hard to look at?"
"No Sara, it is not like that at all, I want nothing more than to look at you, but I don't think it is appropriate at this point to start something, you are injured, freezing cold, why don't you just put a towel on and I will help you rinse your hair."
Grissom coaxed her to put on a towel and rinse the soap out of her hair that she had been fighting with for nearly an hour. He got Sara out of the shower, dried her off and tucked her into bed with lots of blankets to bring her temperature back up. He then changed into some pyjamas and headed for bed.
Grissom woke up to a shivering body curled up beside him in his bed. "Sara, is that you?" he asked reaching for the bedside light.
"Yes," she stammered through her shivering stutters, "Griss, I'm so cold, I couldn't get warm in that big bed all by myself, please let me sleep here and warm up, please!"
He took his arms and wrapped them around her torso pulling her towards him, taking in her scent, rather his scent, since she showered with his shampoo and body wash. He found it somewhat erotic having her, in his clothes, smelling like him, lying in his arms. Grissom lay there in a euphoric state until he fell asleep with Sara in his arms.
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"Griss, aren't you supposed to be somewhere?" Sara asked. "Like didn't you have a conference or something you had to be at? What are you doing here with me?"
"Sara, I got out of my conference, I was just an honored guest anyway, I didn't really have a part in it, I told them something came up."
"What about work?"
"I didn't tell them the difference, what they don't know, won't hurt them. As far as they know, I am at the conference and you are with a friend."
"I am sure they bought that too, Griss, I don't really have that many friends in Vegas, and they know that."
"Oh well, I guess you have a friend they don't know about!"
"I guess I do!"
"So Sara, what are we going to do today? We don't have a whole lot of options, you are in no state to do much, so what do you suggest?"
"I think we should watch a movie, curl up on the couch, how does that sound?"
"I think it sounds wonderful! But first I have to call Catherine and check in on the case."
"Ok Griss, but hurry back!"
"Catherine, how is that case going, have you got anywhere with it? Really? That is an interesting turn of events. I didn't figure it would turn out that way. File the paperwork Catherine and I will handle it when I get back. Sara is doing fine, I called her friend to check on her right before I called you; she is feeling much better today. Alright Catherine, if you need me, you know how to get a hold of me, if not I will see you Monday night, Talk to you later Catherine."
"Sara, our case was solved, it seems that the fabric we found was off of a navy uniform, they traced it to a Lieutenant in her unit, apparently they were intimate with each other, they were secretly a couple. Sounds familiar, egh! She got drunk; her tox screen came back through the roof. When they went back to investigate the scene they found a bloody rock. It was ruled accidental, drunk girl wandered off, fell and hit her head on a rock."
"Wow, not what I expected!"
Grissom took his place on the couch beside Sara and cuddled in to watch a movie.
"Griss, what are we going to do when we go back to work? I mean about us, are we going to pursue this, or is it just a tête-à-tête while I am off sick and injured?"
"Do you think you are going to get rid of me that easy, Ms Sidle? Boy have I got news for you!" Grissom leaned in and kissed her cheek and she turned her head and the kiss landed on her lips. Grissom jumped back quickly, realizing what he had just done.
"What Griss, didn't you like that?" Sara asked coyly.
"I liked that more that you know, but I don't think we should start something in your condition, you are far to sore for us to start anything, maybe we should just take a rain check. As soon as you are better I will collect, this I promise you."
"You are on!"
Grissom carried a sleeping Sara to her bed and tucked her into the covers and retreated to his room. It wasn't an hour when Grissom realized that he had once again had a bedmate. "Sara, why aren't you sleeping in your bed?" he asked.
"Griss, I got lonely in that big bed all by myself, I haven't had to sleep by myself yet, so why are you going to make me start now?"
"Alright Sara, but we will be sleeping, you need your rest to regain your strength, agreed."
"Agreed Grissom!" Sara said as she snuggled up next to Grissom.
Sara leaned in and gave Grissom a passionate kiss and that was all it took. The kiss lasted for what felt like forever and then Grissom realized what he was doing and stopped. "Sara, we can't do this, you agreed that we would sleep Sara, this is far from sleeping!"
"Grissom, it is alright, I want to do this, please Grissom, I have been waiting for so long, please Grisso..." The words did not even get finished and they were in a condition of passion. Their bodies were clinging together into a euphoric state; he was so gentle with her, knowing that she had been injured not too many days ago and he didn't want to make her injuries worse.
"Sara, you ok?" Grissom asked, "I didn't hurt you did I?"
"No Griss, it felt amazing, like nothing I have ever experienced before, personally I think it was worth the four year wait!" She had a grin on her face and it made him feel like a kid in a candy store who just found his favorite treat.
"Shower? Sara would you like to shower with me?"
"I would love to!"
Sara followed Grissom to the shower and he gently washed her body and then her hair. It was then Sara's turn to wash Grissom; she washed him with lovingly strokes. "See Sara, I was not disgusted by your appearance, I was just uncomfortable. I would like nothing more than to wake up every morning and shower with you before we go to work." Sara began to kiss Grissom and one thing led to another and their trip to the shower became more of a sexual encounter than a need to be clean.
"The problem with that Griss," Sara said towelling off after their wet lovemaking, "is that we probably wouldn't get very clean!" Sara tossed Grissom a towel and they returned to the bedroom.
"Do you know that I love you Griss?"
"I think I caught the just of that," he said leaning in for another kiss, " I love you to Sara, but I finally am able to admit that to myself in addition to telling you."
"So now what Griss?"
"I think that we should lay some ground rules for the time being, I think that this should be strictly between us for now, what do you think?"
"As long as I have you, I don't really care, lay all the rules you need to!"
Rules...He thought back to a recent case, the swingers in Vegas. Their rules were:
Come as a couple, leave as a couple.
No pictures, no video.
No affairs.
The kids can never know.
He thought to himself, that's too easy. We usually go places a couple, or as couple as you can get at work, we are always working in close proximity of each other. No pictures, no video; I'm not in to that anyhow, I can't imagine she is! No affairs, now that's funny, neither of us is married to each other or to anyone else for that matter. And the kids can never know, well they have no kids, except their baby, work, and he wasn't ready for anyone to know about them...not yet anyway!
"So are we gonna discuss our rules Sara?"
"Sure Griss, what do you suggest?"
"Let me see," he thought for a moment, "we are going to have to be careful at work, I'm not sure Cavallo will be pleased if he gets wind of this. Eckle would certainly use this against us too, so while we are at work, we are Grissom and Sara, Supervisor and subordinate. When we are home it is a whole new story. Do you have anything to add Sara?"
"Nope, sounds good to me!"
It wasn't long before Sara returned to work, she still had some sore ribs, but it was more her own fault than not. She really didn't let them heal properly before jumping into a full-blown relationship with Grissom. As far as she was concerned, it was worth it, pain and all, the pleasure certainly outweighed the pain. Sara sat and thought with a snide smile on her face. She was with Grissom, or at least on their time off, she was ok with that, it was better than longing to be with him like she had done for many years now. All her dreams had come true so far, or at least most of them had!
Grissom walked into the break room to give out assignments. He paired Nick and Catherine together on a DB in the dessert. He paired himself with Warrick on a situation in the sewer and he paired Sara with Greg in the lab doing Trace until something more exciting came up for them to do. Sara looked at him kinda hurt, but she knew it was for her own good. Grissom walked by, close to Sara and he could smell her, she reached over and nonchalantly touched the small of his back, she new it sent chills down his spine and then she walked away! That will teach you! She thought, tit for tat! I just made his evening nearly as bad as mine is going to be, well now, maybe his will be worse! She chuckled to herself.
"What's so funny, Sara?" Greg asked quizzing.
"Nothing! Just had a thought, that's all!"
"Care to share?"
"Nope!"
"Must be carnal, egh! Ms Sidle, who are you dreaming about.... oh is it me?" Greg had a look of hope in his eyes.
"Dream on, Greggo, we gotta get to work."
Luckily Grissom had a body, complete with bugs to analyze, to keep his mind off of Sara, that wasn't easy. By the time they analyzed the scene, processed the evidence and organized it and went back to the lab, it was nearly time for shift to end and time to go home. Grissom walked into the Trace lab where he found Sara and Greg.
"Hey guys! Finish up what you are working on and when shift ends head home. We don't have any money for overtime right now, so no one gets to work it right now. Sara, could I see you in my office for a few minutes, we need to discuss some paperwork from your injuries."
"Sure Griss, I'll be right there!"
Sara finished up what she was doing and left Greg to finish what he was doing and to file the paperwork, he needed the experience anyway. She walked into Grissom's office and he beckoned for her to shut the door behind her. She approached his desk and began to speak. "Alright Grissom, what did you want me for?"
"This" he said as he grabbed her and placed a kiss on her lips.
"Well now, Mr Grissom, I don't think that is appropriate for hours of work!"
"Well, Ms Sidle, you drive me absolutely insane, I had all I could do to concentrate on the bugs, and you know how much I like bugs..." his words led off and she kissed him again.
"I have one thing to say! Home! And I do mean now!" she said as she walked out of his office.
Sara left and headed for her vehicle. Grissom said his goodbyes and headed for his SUV and was right on her tail. They arrived almost simultaneously at Grissom's townhouse. They rushed through the front door and had all they could do to constrain their passion.
"Sara," he said through soft kisses, "You damn near drive me insane! How am I supposed to do this? I am not sure how we are going to handle this."
"Griss, don't talk...now, you have some business to attend to!" Sara said smirking as she pointed down at his forcing erection.
They finished up what they had to attend to and then lied there and fell asleep in a tangled slumber.
Sara woke up first and looked over at her sleeping Grissom. "Hey Griss," she said drawing circles on his chest, "you awake?"
"I am now!" he said as he looked over at his grinning lover.
"Griss, what are we going to do about us? I mean we saw lastnight that us working together and pursuing a romantic relationship is going to be hard at best. We are going to have some serious problems."
"Sara, everything is new, it will calm down my dear, I promise. Now come back down here and lie down I want as much of you as I can get before we have to go back to work."
Sara lay down in his arms and placed a gentle kiss on his chest. "I love you, do you know that?"
"I knew that my dear, a long time ago, I was just the stupid one that wouldn't admit it to myself, I was the one who was missing out, I am so glad you finally opened up my eyes."
They lay there breathing in sync and fell back into a lovers slumber.
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Sara looked at the calendar. It had been just over a month since her and Grissom had started their relationship. That wasn't the problem; the problem was that she was late. Not for dinner, or work, that she could deal with, but she was late, her menstrual cycle was supposed to start nearly two weeks ago and it still hadn't yet, she began to get worried. She was on a low dose of Birth Control Pills, had been for years, not that her sex life was ever that extreme, it was more of a precaution, a just in case. Now what? She asked herself. You know what you have to do Sara!! She said to herself as she grabbed her keys and headed for the car.
There are so many to choose from, why do they need like 30 different varieties of Home Pregnancy tests, why can't they just have one? Sara grabbed the first one she saw and headed to the pharmacy counter to pay for it and leave the store before somebody realized what she was doing.
She walked into the house and opened the box to read the instructions. It was not as if she had ever had a need for anything like this ever before. She had bought the one that you could use at any time during the day so she quickly unwrapped it from the plastic covering and hurried to the bathroom to do her business. She thought to herself as she tried to position the small strip into her stream of urine. This is disgusting! How come all of the things women have to do are always disgusting, first you bleed for weeks on end and have to shove things up inside you so you don't make a mess and now I have to stick my hands in my pee to see if I am pregnant! Pregnant! She thought, what if I'm pregnant, then what am I supposed to do?
She finished up her business and washed her hand and set her watch for five minutes and walked out into the living room. It was the longest five minutes in the history of time. Her watch went off and she knew that D-Day was upon her. She walked into the bathroom and looked down at the little devise sitting on the counter and began to cry. It was positive, the little plus sign in the window said so; she was pregnant! This caused a whole lot more problems than she was ready to bear.
Sara left the bathroom and went out to the living room and sat there on the couch with her thoughts. Well Sara, aren't we smart, we were in charge of birth control and we couldn't even get that right. So what are you going to do now? We have to tell Grissom, don't we, or we could just go and have an abortion and not even tell him, he wouldn't even be the wiser. Jesus Sara, leave it to you, nothing is ever easy in your life. It was all going so good, and then this had to happen!
Suddenly the phone rang, "Hello"
"Sara, its Grissom, do you miss me yet?"
She was silent on the phone, "Sara, honey, are you ok?" he asked with concern.
"Griss, I am not in the mood to talk."
"Sara, why are you upset? What is wrong? Sara I'm coming over!" and with that he hung up the phone.
Sara sat there, on the couch, with her head in her hands, now what Sara! He is on his way here, how are you going to handle this?
There was a gentle knock on the door and then Grissom entered her apartment. He noticed an upset Sara sitting on the couch crying and quickly approached her.
"Sara, honey, what's wrong?"
"Bathroom..." was all she could squeak out before she buried her head in his strong chest.
"Bathroom?" he asked. She nodded.
He got up and walked to the bathroom and couldn't miss the small device on the counter, he picked it up and walked back out to the living room with it still in his hand.
"Sara, does this mean what I think it does?"
Sara nodded, "I'm so sorry Griss, I am so confused! If you don't want to see me anymore, I will understand, this is all my fault."
"How is this your fault, I got just as much enjoyment out of our sexcapades as you did, maybe even more, but I thought you were on the pill?"
"I was, but I guess it wasn't as good as I thought. It wasn't as if I ever had a real chance to try it out, it wasn't as if I had a real regular sex life, Grissom, at least not until you!"
"Well Sara, first of all, I'm not leaving you, I am not sixteen for God sakes Sara, I am a grown man, so I am not going to run away from my indiscretions. Secondly, we will get through this, that I promise you." And with that he leaned down and kissed her forehead and sat beside her on the couch and offered her a comfortable embrace.
"So Griss, ever thought about having kids?"
"Not really Sara, the way my life was going I didn't ever figure I'd find someone to have kids with before I got too old, who am I kidding Sara, I am old. Oh my God, are we ready for this?"
"Well Griss, there are other options."
"No way Sara! That is not an option! I grew up as a single kid whose father left him when he was just young, I may not be the best father in this world, but I will try my best, we will learn together."
"Griss, what are we gonna tell them at work?"
"Oh shit, this is not gonna stay a secret for too long, is it?"
"No, I am afraid not, but we have a little while before we have to tell anyone."
"Are you happy Griss?"
"I am now!" he said as he leaned in and kissed Sara.
Sara walked into the locker room and put her bag down and made a be-line for the toilet. She stood over the toilet wrenching her guts out when she heard a voice.
"Sara, you ok?" came the voice
"Yup Cath, I guess I just ate some bad yogurt or something, I'll be right out."
"Ok Sara, I'll see you out there." And Catherine left.
Sara got up from her stance over the toilet and washed her hands and sprinkled some water on her face. If this is going to be a regular occurrence, you may not be able to keep it a secret for long.
Sara went to join the rest of the team in the break room for assignments. Grissom took one look at her and knew something was wrong.
"Cath, you and Warrick are still working on that open case, right, are you coming along alright on that?" he asked
They nodded and left the room.
"Nicky, you got a body found in a dumpster, she has already been Id'ed and we just need to know what happened. Take Greg with you." He said passing them the file.
""Sara, you and me need to see a man about some bugs!"
Sara trailed behind Grissom as they approached the SUV. She got in the truck, Grissom right behind her. "Sara, honey, are you ok? You look a little green."
"I just puked my guts out, if I keep this up Griss they are gonna know in a matter of days. Maybe we should just tell them."
"We can't tell them until we first tell Cavallo, he will freak if he finds out from the office gossip line. I will call and make an appointment with him for tomorrow."
"Do you want me to go with you?"
"No Sara, I think that I should go myself, to cushion the blow."
"Ok Griss, don't we have to see a body about some bugs?" she chuckled.
"Yes we do!"
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The trip to Cavallo's office seemed so long, it was not as if he had never walked it before, but he had never walked it before for this reason.
"Gil, come on in, what did you want to talk to me about?"
"Lets see, where do I start? I am sure you are aware of some things going on in this place. There is something I want to tell you before you hear it from the gossip line."
"Spit it out Gil!"
"Sara Sidle and I are dating! There I said it!"
"Sidle? How long has this been going on?"
"Not that long, really, but we have kept in a secret, but we are soon going to have troubles soon."
"Troubles, why is that?"
"Well, we seem to have a bit of an issue...er...um!"
"Spit it out Gil!"
"She is pregnant!"
"Jesus Gil, Don't you know what causes that?"
"It's not like that at all, we were safe, just not as safe as we had thought."
"So are you going to reprimand me for this...being involved with a subordinate?"
"Gil, you know as well as I do that there are no rules against this sort of thing. It is not encouraged, but not illegal either. We are just going to have to change a few things, but all and all as long as you maintain a good professional relationship at work, I can't see it being a problem."
"Changes, what changes?"
"Well if you are dating, you can no longer sign her leave and do her evaluations, but outside of that, I think that is it."
"Catherine can do it, she is training to be a supervisor any way, she has some seniority under her belt."
"Run it by her and let me know!"
"See ya later!"
"Oh, and Gil, Congratulations!"
"Thanks!" he said as he walked away. That was too easy, am I dreaming? I thought that would be harder than that, the rest is going to be a piece of cake.
Grissom walked into the townhouse and saw Sara sleeping on the couch. He bent down and scooped her up to lay her in the bed to continue her slumber. Sara briefly woke up and began to ask Grissom questions.
"So how did it go?" she asked in a yawn.
"Honestly, better than I expected! I can't do your evaluations or your leave requests, but other than that there is no problem. It is not illegal, it is just not encouraged either."
"Did you tell him about this?" she asked pointing at her small belly.
"Yes, my dear, and he sent his congratulations."
"Griss, are we gonna tell the others?"
"Yes, I'm going to ask them to meet us here after work tomorrow, we will tell them then."
"Ok, good, are you coming to bed?"
"I just need to change and then I will join you."
Grissom stepped out if the bathroom and joined Sara in the bed. "Sara, what do you think about living with me full time?"
"Full time? As in not having my apartment?"
"That's what I asked, how do you feel about that?"
"Well, it is almost too late to feel uncomfortable about it now, isn't it?" she said as she stroked her tummy.
"Do you want to stay here, with me, or do you want to find a place together?"
"Here is fine Griss, you got one spare room, as long as we don't get too presumptuous and decide to have a baseball team, we should be ok."
"Baseball team, egh?" he said with a chuckle.
"Let me get through one first before we decide on more. Don't you know I am going to be fat, moody, dependant I'm not sure how well I'm gonna be able to handle this Griss, what if I can't do it?"
"Sara, you will be fine." He gave her a reassuring kiss on her forehead.
"Promise."
"I promise."
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"Ms Sidle, the doctor is ready to see you now."
"Can Grissom come too?"
"Certainly, I don't see why there would be a problem."
The doctor was a young woman, not much older than Sara. She welcomed them to her office, introduced herself and began to talk to them.
"So this is your first baby I see. Is everything going alright, do you have any questions?"
"I have done some reading on this already Doc," Sara stated, "So I kinda know what to expect, but I am not sure yet how I am going to take to the changes my body's gonna go through."
"You will get used to it, and after you hold the precious baby in your arms you will know it was all worth it. Do you want to see your baby?"
"We can see it?"
"Well kinda, it is small, but with an ultrasound, I can show you what is there so far, and let you hear the heartbeat. Let me check my records to see how far along you are."
"Ok Ms Sidle."
"Please call me Sara."
"Ok Sara, based on this, you are about twelve weeks. Does that sound about right?"
"Twelve weeks sounds about right. So if that's a fact, when will the baby be due?"
"By my calculations, the baby will be due around the 15th of June."
They were in awe at the small creature on the screen. The doctor pointed out to them where the baby was and what each part was, and then they got to hear the heartbeat. Sara was nearly in tears as she listened to the soft beating illuminating from the machine.
"Damn hormones!" she said as she wiped the tears from her face.
"Sara, I want to see you again in a month to make sure this is progressing properly, if you have any questions in the mean time don't hesitate to call me."
"See ya Doc." They said as they left the office.
"Griss, did you see our baby. We created that, we created a life from our love, aren't we fortunate?"
"Sara, every day I spend with you I feel more and more fortunate."
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The night shift was winding down when Grissom called a meeting in the break room. Once everyone was there, he began to speak.
"We would like to invite you over to the townhouse after shift for breakfast, we have something we want to discuss with you." And with that Grissom left.
They all looked at each other, "We?"
"Its on now, we gotta go now to see what was going on!" was the only comment from Warrick.
Catherine was the first to arrive at Grissom's townhouse; she knocked on the door and walked in. Grissom was sitting down on the couch with his arm around a sleeping Sara. Nick and Warrick arrived at the same time and saw what had surprised Catherine. Greg arrived a few seconds later.
"Well guys, I can only assume you know why I wanted you to come over here."
"So by ''we" you meant you and Sara?" Catherine asked.
"Yes, by we I meant me and Sara, among other things. But that's not all. We have some other news to share with you as well, don't we Sara." Grissom said looking down at a semi-conscious Sara.
"Yes guys, we have some pretty exciting news to share."
"Well share it already!"
"Well, we seem to ...er...um "
"Were pregnant!"
"You are what? That explains the vomiting I have caught you doing in the locker room. I was starting to wonder if you had an eating disorder or something, one person could not eat that much bad yogurt." Catherine smiled.
"We just didn't want to tell anyone, not until we told Cavallo."
"So Cavallo knows? What did he say?"
"He basically is ok with it, but Cath, you have to do Sara's evaluations and all her personal leave requests and such, I hope that is alright with you, if not you then Eckle."
"No, Gil, it is alright, I really don't mind."
"So when is the big day?" Nick asked.
"By big day, do you mean when the baby is due?"
"What else, unless you two are planning on getting married."
"June 15th is our due date."
"Congratulations" ran through the room.
"Hey guys," Grissom asked looking at the boys sitting in his living room, "Sara is moving in here permanently, do you think you could give me a hand moving her stuff?"
"No problem!" they all answered.
"Cath, could you stay with Sara while we move her things? I am sure you can find things to talk about."
"Sure Griss, when do you want to do this?"
"I was thinking today, after we all sleep that is, the sooner we get her stuff in here, the sooner she can get rid of her apartment."
"Ok Griss we will meet back here around what, three this afternoon."
"Sounds good!"
And with that the crowd left the living room and Grissom picked up Sara and carried her to the bedroom.
"Grissom, will you make love to me?" Sara asked.
"Aren't you tired?"
"Not too tired for you, besides, there will come a time when you won't want to touch me."
"It will never come to that."
And with those words Grissom rolled Sara on top of him and he began to gently make love to her. "On the bright side...we don't need birth control right now!" he said as he reached for her shirt to remove it.
"You always see the good in every situation!" Sara stated as she tugged at his pants to remove them so that she could have her way with him. After their sweaty attack, they lay there tangled in a mess of blankets and succumbed to sleep.
At exactly three o clock there was a knock at the door. The whole night shift crew stood before Grissom, including Doc Robins and Brass. "We are here to help you move!" And with that Grissom allowed them to walk in the house.
"Jeez Gil, when were you going to tell me about this?" Jim Brass asked.
"Actually, I planned on telling you today, I assume Catherine beat me to it."
"Actually it was Greg, I saw him at the corner store a couple of hours ago and he told me of the news. Congratulations, by the way."
"Thanks."
"It's about time you know!"
The guys gathered up themselves and went over to move Sara. Catherine and Lindsay sat there with Sara; Catherine was discussing childbirth with Sara.
"So Cath, how fat am I going to get?"
"It depends Sara, everyone is different, myself, I was huge! I could barely find clothes to fit me."
"Cath, you really know how to make a girl feel good!"
The girls sat there sipping tea and chatting when the guys came back with the first load of Sara's stuff.
"Jeez Sara, did you purposely get the heaviest furniture you could find?"
"That furniture was my Grandmothers, it is antique."
"And heavy as hell!"
With that the guys left for the next load.
"So Sara, have you thought of names for the baby?"
"Its kinda early, isn't it?"
"You don't want to be rushed, you really should start thinking of some names, have you decided if you want to know the baby's sex?"
"I don't think we want to know, we want it to be a surprise."
"What are you going to do the baby's room in?"
"Some bug theme, of course, to appease Grissom, I can't complain, some of those prints are actually cute."
"Sara, are you telling me that you find bugs to be cute?"
"Yes, I guess I am!"
"I don't know what he did to you, it has got to be love!"
"More than you know Cath."
They neatly piled Sara's furniture into the garage at Grissom's townhouse. Her personal belongings they brought in the house for Sara and Catherine to go through. They ran around putting things away, re-arranging Grissom's life even more.
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"Grissom, what do you think we should name our little one?"
"I don't know, I have never really thought about it."
"What about you, have you thought of anything you would like to name it?"
"I know I don't like 'it'."
"Do you have any special names in your family, any you would consider naming a child?"
"Not really, my name is strange enough!"
"What about you Sara?"
"My name is plain, I would have rather had a more exciting name growing up instead of plain Sara."
"So what would you have rather been called, instead of Sara?"
"I'm not sure, I think I would have been happier as Delaney or something fun like that. My parents were hippies, so I guess I should be fortunate that I'm not Shadow Moonbeam."
"Shadow Moonbeam Sidle, that has a nice ring to it."
"Shut up Griss, that is not funny!"
"So Delaney, egh, Delaney what?"
"I'm not sure, Delaney Grissom for sure, we can discuss a middle name at a later date. So it's Delaney for a girl, what about a boy?"
"That is your department, Griss."
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"That is so adorable, Griss, don't you think?" Sara said looking at the wallpaper with the little dragonflies on it.
"Do you really like it?"
"I think we should do the nursery in dragonflies."
"Are you sure Sara?"
"Yup, I am sure. Dragonflies are universal, they could be for either a boy or a girl, I could get my mom to make us a crib set for the room, with dragonflies as well."
"You are really into this, aren't you?"
"Yup!"
"You know you look so cute with that little round belly." Grissom said rubbing her bulging belly.
"I'm fat Griss, I can't see my toes, tie my shoes, I can barely find clothes that fit me for God sakes!"
"I think it is cute, almost sexy!"
"You think that a fat pregnant lady is sexy."
"Yes, as a matter of fact, I do!"
"You are one strange man Gil Grissom!"
"I am your strange man Sara!"
"Sara, I think that we should get married, I mean soon, before the baby comes."
"When do you suggest?"
"Well, it is April already, so how about a Mid May wedding, just an intimate affair, close friends, maybe some family."
"Sure Grissom, are you gonna plan this?"
"You betcha! I'm sure Catherine will help me."
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"Gil, have you ever planned a wedding before?"
"No, Catherine, but I know you have, so you got to help me, Sara is in no state to help me, she has her own problems right now. She feels unsexy, fat and unwanted, but she is so far from the truth. I think she is sexy, I find myself growing more and more attracted to her each day." Catherine stopped him.
"Gil, if you want me to help you, I certainly do not need to know about your extra curricular activities."
"Alright Cath, I will stop."
"So Gil, what kind of a wedding do you want to have?"
"Just a simple wedding, just friends and family. You, Nick, Warrick, Brass, Greg, my mother, Sara's parents and Sara's brother."
"Do you know how to get a hold of those people? I mean Sara's family? They are in Tamales Bay aren't they?"
"Where do you want to have the wedding?"
"I think it would mean a lot to Sara to have the wedding at her parent's place in Tamales Bay."
"Ok, well I will call her parents and see if that's ok with them, I will let you know Gil."
Catharine picked up the phone and dialled the number, "Mrs Sidle I presume, I'm Catherine Willows, and I work with Sara at the LVPD. My reason for calling you is this. Sara and Gil are planning on getting married in mid May, before the baby comes and Gil figures it would mean more to Sara if they got married at your B&B. If that is a problem, I'm sure we can find a suitable place in Vegas."
The reply on the phone was short and loud, "My dear, she is our only daughter, I wouldn't have it any other way!"
"They just want a small intimate wedding, just friends and close family, Sara doesn't want a big wedding, not in her condition. Ok Mrs Sidle, I will see what they want and get back to you."
Catherine went to find Grissom. She found him in his office attempting to write a guest list and attempting to plan their wedding.
"Gil, I got a hold of Sara's mom, she is ecstatic about the wedding. I told her I would finalize things on this end and then call her back."
"Sara will be pleased I am sure."
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"Ok Sara, we need to discuss this wedding."
"You are actually planning this?"
"I told you I would."
"It just surprises me is all."
"Sara I love you, I would do anything for you. So what are your favorite colors? Who do you want as your bridesmaids? What type of cake? I need answers Sara."
"Jeez Grissom, I don't know, I kinda like Burgundy I guess, what goes with Burgundy? I'll have to ask Catherine what she suggests. As for bridesmaids, I don't have a lot of friends Grissom, except for Catherine, She can be my maid of honor, I guess, but I don't have a lot of close friends, so maybe we will leave it with that. I am not sure Nicky, Warrick and Greggo would enjoy being dressed in drag for my wedding, what about you Grissom, who will be your best man?"
"I'm thinking of asking Brass, what do you think?"
"I think he is probably your oldest friend, so that only makes sense, I'm sure he will accept. As for cake, all cake is good Grissom, look at me for god sakes, I'm really looking forward to dressing up like Shamu so that I can get married." Sara added with sarcasm.
"Sara, I love you, Shamu and all, can't you just drop this and love yourself Sara, you are carrying a life, a life made by you and I, I love you for that, I'd love you no matter what."
"Grissom, I know I am difficult sometimes, I am sorry, I just can't get used to these raging hormones. I'm so sorry Griss." Sara began to cry.
"Sara, honey, it is ok, I understand you are going through things that I will never understand, but I'm here for you sweetie, now and forever, do you believe me?"
"Griss, you're compassionate, I'm not sure I deserve you. I sit and wonder what I ever did to deserve you, but I do love you. Grissom, make love to me, show me that you love me."
"Sara, are you sure that is what you want, I mean it is your call."
"Yes Griss, I want this, please do this for me."
Grissom picked her up in his arms and placed her on the bed. He began to gently undress her; he was so gentle, she thought, her being as big as a moose and he still found her as sexy as she was prior to her being pregnant, with this swollen belly. He was so gentle caressing her every curve and stopping to place gentle kisses on her protruding belly.
"Griss, what are you doing?" Sara asked
"I'm kissing the baby," he said continuing on his mission, "I thought that since the baby was present, I'd include them in our lovemaking, wouldn't want him or her to feel left out."
"Griss, have I told you how much I love you lately?"
"You don't have to, I can see it in your eyes when I look at you."
"Come on, my darling, lets get you naked," She said tugging at his clothes, "I am a horny pregnant woman now undress damnit before I get mad!"
Grissom succumbed to her demands. He was very gentle and took his time. He always did. She enjoyed their lovemaking; he was so attentive to her needs, not like any other man she had ever been with. He was amazing.
Sara lay there before Grissom woke up thinking to herself. We have a baby name for a girl, but what if this poor child is a boy? O My God he is going to be nameless!
"Grissom, wake up! We have a problem! What if the baby is a boy? We have a name if it is a girl, but what about if it is a boy, you never did come up with a name!"
A sleepy Grissom woke up and placed his hand on hers to try to calm her down. "Sara, honey, calm down! Calm down! We have a little while. I am still thinking of names, it is a long process for me, remember my dear, I have to analyze everything, I haven't come up with the perfect fit yet."
"Griss, I'm so scared, what if we are awful parents?"
"Sara, honey, everything will be alright, I promise! I will be her with you forever!"
"Promise?"
"Yes, I promise! Now go back to sleep." His words made her feel like putty. She felt as though no one could ever hurt her when she was in his arms.
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Sara sat in the big chair in the lab, Grissom had special ordered it for her so that she would be comfortable now that she was strictly on desk duty. Being eight months pregnant made it difficult to do much in the field, so she willingly accepted the desk duty; it was only for a little while.
It was only a week until the wedding, Sara was getting very nervous. This wasn't quite the wedding she expected, but it was suiting for this time in her life. Everyone was planning on staying at the B they were all driving out together. Catherine made most of the arrangements, Sara knew Grissom was not quite adept enough to do it all, some of it needed a woman's touch, and he was strict to it being a surprise to Sara, including her dress, they took measurements, but other than that Sara has seen nothing. The colors ended up being Cranberry and Cream, They complimented each other quite well. Grissom's mother was meeting them at the B&B, Sara was nervous about that too, this would be the first time she met his mother, what if she didn't like her? Sara, it's just cold feet, everything will be alright. He loves you, that's all that matters.
The B&B was beautifully decorated. Sara's mother was overzealous with the thoughts of the wedding; her baby girl was pregnant, and getting married all at nearly the same time. The wedding was set for seven the next evening, and everyone was all a stir.
"Sara, I assume," the older woman said as she approached her, "I'm Gil's mother." Her words were short and concise. Sara then remembered that she was deaf. Grissom approached and started signing to his mother.
"Sara, my mother likes you, she thinks you are good for me, she hasn't seen me this happy in years. She is very excited about finally being a grandmother, she figured at my age it would never happen." Sara leaned over and gave Grissom a kiss on the cheek, his mother smiled incessantly.
The ceremony was intimate; maybe thirty people were in attendance. Everyone was dressed to the nines. Catherine was in a simple elegant cranberry colored dress, floor length accompanied by cranberry stilettos. The guys were all dressed in tuxedos, they all looked good, but Grissom looked the best of them all. He was dressed in a black tuxedo with tails. It was accented with a cream-colored cummerbund and bowtie, he looked breathtaking. But he paled in comparison to Sara. Sara was dressed in a beautiful cream-colored peasant gown that was accented with cranberry. The dress was tapered under the breast and fell out to hide her protruding belly. Her hair was done in an up do and she has small curls hanging down and a small veil complimented her hairstyle. When she reached the altar, Grissom was speechless.
"Sara, you are breathtaking." He whispered.
Sara begun to cry and then the ceremony began. The ceremony was short and sweet. Sara was grateful for that, any time spent on her feet was painful these days. Sara couldn't even wear shoes with her wedding gown, her feet were too swollen, but that was alright, she didn't mind. They finished up with the formalities and then the reception began. The music started, the first song was their song. As soon as the music started Sara recognized the song. It was Broken, so long ago it made her think of Grissom and now he chose that as their wedding song.
"Sara, you aren't broken any more," he whispered in her ear, "I fixed you!" and they shared a kiss.
"Griss, how did you know I liked that song, that it reminded me of you?"
"I know more than I let on Sara, I'm very observant, I'm an investigator after all."
"I love you!" was all she could say when a strange look came across her face. "Gris..... Oh my god......I think my water just broke." She yelled and a hush came over the crowd.
"Come on Sara," he said grabbing her hand, "we need to get you to the hospital."
Her contractions were only minutes apart but the time she was admitted to the hospital. Sara was screaming and Grissom wanted nothing more than to take her pain away. The doctor came in and examined her, she was seven centimetres dilated and partially effaced, and the doctor consoled her and told her it wouldn't be long. He was right, within the hour, Sara gave birth to a beautiful seven-pound baby girl. She was beautiful. She had a full head of hair and she was the spitting image of Sara. Sara looked down at the small person staring back up at her and she realized what the doctor meant when she said after it was all done, you know it was worth it.
"Griss, isn't she beautiful?" Sara said with a tear running down her cheek.
"She is amazing Sara, she is .....breathtaking, just like her mother." He said as he placed a kiss on her sweaty forehead.
"Grissom, am I beautiful?" Sara asked.
"More than you know Sara." He said as he placed a gentle kiss on her lips, "More than you know."
"Sara, we got our Delaney, didn't we?"
"We did so, Griss. Did you ever come up with a boys name?"
"Yes I did, I decided on Andrew Sidle Grissom."
"We still need a middle name for Delaney."
"I think it should be Sidle, what do you think?"
"Delaney Sidle Grissom, it has a nice ring to it, I like it!" She smiled at Grissom and then looked at the baby. "Delaney Sidle Grissom, welcome to the world, we are your parents and we love you very much."
"Yes we do!" he added giving the baby a gentle kiss on her forehead.
"So Sara, when we get back to Vegas, are you going to go by Sidle or Grissom?"
"God Griss, I have been pursuing you for like forever, do you think that given the chance I was gonna pass it up and keep my name, not on your life!" She sealed it with a kiss.
Grissom was in a euphoric state as he held his wife, he liked the sound of that, wife in his arms and looked down at their newborn daughter, his life was complete, he had everything he could ever want in life and he was a happy as he could ever be.
The rest of the gang was outside the door waiting patiently to see the new addition to the Grissom family.
Grissom walked out coddling the baby in his arms, "Guys, I want you to meet Delaney Sidle Grissom, my daughter."
Grissom had a million dollar grin on his face and he was certain it would be there permanently.
EPILOGUESara and Grissom were extremely happy with their new life together. Sara took to being a mother like she had done it before. Grissom was amazed at how happy she was, he was just upset he didn't give in to her advances at an earlier time, when she first came to Vegas; he thought, if he hadn't been so stupid he could have been this happy long before this. He looked down at his beautiful daughter with the gap toothed smile and the swollen belly protruding from his wife and knew he would be this happy for the rest of his life.