In a shitty story I started a while back - that I'm nowhere near ready to post and probably never will cause both I and my work suck – I gave Blossom a career in the paleontology field. My mom put on Jurassic World the other night and I came up with this. The Jurassic Park AU no one wanted.
Sorry not sorry.
For some reason FF deleted or changed random stuff from the first chapter. They were little things but it annoyed me and I had to fix them. Happy Star Wars Day! May the Fourth be with You!
The clicking of heels on the linoleum floors echoed through the empty hall. Click, clack, click, clack. The only other sound that could be heard was the gust of air being thrust through the glass doors sliding open almost too slowly. A tall, copper haired woman picked up her speed to a near sprint, but with each step it felt as if she was running the opposite way on a walking sidewalk, she seemed no closer to her destination.
"Did they-" the woman began but any sentence she had formulated stopped at the sight before her. A sea of white-coats had crowded around the small incubator in the middle of the room. Some had propped themselves up on the backs of others just to get a peek inside.
No no no no no.
The woman squeezed her way through the masses, attempting and possibly failing to make a path for herself. Everyone in the room was too engrossed with the ring of eggs situated in the incubator.
No no no no no.
With a huff, she may have purposely stepped on several toes to part the white sea of lab coats. It happened. It really happened. Acknowledging who was forcing her way through, many of the scientists backed up to allow her to press herself up against the glass. It happened. She took in a slow, shaky breath before reaching her hand out to lay upon said glass. She had vetoed the creation of this paddock for the past two and a half years, yet before her was the product of an override. The Board of Trustees had gotten their wish.
"Fascinating, isn't it?" a voice asked but the woman ignored it, ignored all the voices exchanging thoughts on the new addition to their prehistoric family. The woman could only picture the pocket-sized disasters blinking their amber eyes up at her as they backed her into a corner. No matter how hard she fought, she had brought a pack of carnivores into her park. What had she done?
"What have we done?" she whimpered, her voiced drowned out by the sound of everyone patting themselves on the back.
"Sweetheart, you okay?"
The woman spun around, nearly giving herself whiplash in the process. Common sense told her to congratulate him. He was lead on this project. After a few years of research and development, they had succeeded in the creation of what would soon be four healthy, man-eating catastrophes. But her gut told her to be wary. This was not a success. This was an omen. Glancing over her shoulder back at the eggs the woman let out a sigh.
"I'm fine Father, it's just we have yet to find trainers for the new assets. No one has passed our evaluations." By passing their evaluations she meant she wanted to delay finding a trainer as long as possible to the point where no one would want the job and eventually the project would be cancelled. Sadly, the Board of Directors had more say than she did. Even without trainers, the BoT (or the Board of Twits as she lovingly refers to them in her head) gave the Park the a-okay to go ahead with the apex predator exhibits. Operations Manager be damned.
The woman had several interested in the openings until it was reiterated that the trainers would work with carnivores, not herbivores. Half of the prospects had walked. Half of the half still left, dropped out when they saw their quite hefty paychecks. Apparently it was not enough for someone dealing with predators. The handful that was left after all of that either were nowhere near qualified or their interviews were horrid. One guy had worn khaki shorts to his interview.
It was over Skype.
"You'll find someone trust me. Mayor found us when he was looking for someone crazy enough to bring dinosaurs back to life."
Unlocking her tablet, the woman added visiting the Asset Control Unit to her checklist for the day. She needed to ensure they had come up with plans A-Z in case something went horribly wrong with the new additions. She had already placed orders in for new equipment just in case of an asset out of containment, more lethal ammunition. The park throughout its early years had simple to fix asset out of containment scares. Nothing would go wrong under her watch. She had a park and its patrons to protect.
Entering the control room, Blossom let out a breath she hadn't known she had been holding. A pack! They were adding a pack of dinosaurs into one paddock! When she had taken over as Operations Manager she hadn't expected they would resort to adding multiple highly dangerous creatures in one exhibit. All other apex predators were isolated. She remembered the dreaded meeting. Her father had come with her, being the head geneticist and her mother being the lawyer/advisor to the CEO (read: the CEO) had already been seated at the long conference table. The Board of Twits had filtered in one by one and the small man holding the title of CEO had all but skipped in, armed with a jar of pickles.
They began discussing the slight dip in profits during the recent years compared to when the park first opened. The park itself originally had started when the small man before her came up to her father with a crazy idea. He showed him a mosquito encased inside of a piece of amber. He then went on to explain his family believed the mosquito had bitten a dinosaur before becoming trapped by sap. The man asked if her father would extract the DNA inside of the mosquito to create a dinosaur for him. When her father had seemed hesitant, Mayor explained money wasn't an issue, he'd fund it all. From there the park grew to the multi-billion dollar corporation it was today.
The exhibits just weren't cutting it anymore. The Board of Twits wanted "bigger", "scarier" and "more badass". They had a PowerPoint presentation laying out several dinosaurs they (and all the single share shareholders who send in their yearly votes) were interested in – such as the Allosaurus, the Carnotaurus, and the Velociraptor. The Board debated for over an hour between the Allosaurus and the Velociraptor. One half wanted to know if some paleontologists theory of pack mentality was true while the other half were fans of The Lost World. Eventually her parents had ended the debate, her father wanting to test out if Velociraptors hunted in packs.
That day will always be seared into her mind.
"Your phone has been ringing on and off for the past hour."
Bl, turned towards whoever just spoke and saw a mop of brown hair. She was not in the mood for people, especially people named Mitch.
"Can we disconnect the phones? If it's important they can call my cell."
"Not sure that's how it works Boss." He cackled. With slow strides, she headed towards the cackling brunet who passed over a laminated folder. "Mayor should be in within the hour so you guys can talk about whatever it is you important people talk about. And when I say Mayor I mean your mom." Blossom let out a small smile before noticing a red blip on the control room's screen which displayed the whole park.
"What's wrong in the Gyrosphere?" Her eyes roamed over the screen trying to find a video feed of what was occurring.
Clicking a few buttons on his computer's touch-screen, an enlarged feed of the Gyrosphere was displayed on the control room's much larger screen. An ACU van was parked and a tall, brunette stood beside it, a tranquilizer gun strapped over one shoulder and a Parasaurolophus laid on the ground in front of her. A Mobile Veterinarian Unit had sped into the video feed and a veterinarian flew out of the passenger side door. Mitch raised the volume on the radio feed. The veterinarian yelled out for her assistant to grab several things while the woman from ACU began setting up the medical tent.
Blossom's phone chirped, signaling she had received an email and the woman was torn between figuring out what was wrong with one of her assets and reading whatever had been sent to her. Unlocking her phone, the woman ignored the email's notification and dialed a number she knew by heart.
"What's up Commander?"
"BC what's wrong with the Parasaurolophus?" the woman on the screen looked up as if she could see them in the control room and saluted.
"Hey Big Brother."
"Buttercup, what is wrong with the Parasaurolophus?" Blossom reiterated, trying to see what was going on but her sight was impaired by the medical tent. Her eyes scanned the other feeds for a camera catching what was occurring from a different angle.
"Passed out, possibly heat exhaustion?" Buttercup shrugged, adjusting her hat, "Not too hot out today though… well compared to normal Central American weather." The veterinarian hissed something out that Blossom couldn't catch but she watched the brunette's reaction. It wasn't good. The woman's shoulders tensed, "Uh Commander, they need to bring in the Parasaurolophus."
Gripping her phone tighter, Blossom asked for her to hand the phone over to the vet. Buttercup shook her head, "Need to help them get it into the MVU, I will call you back when we get her to the lab. Why not go get an actual breakfast because a parfait is not actual food? Maybe have a nice smoothie as well? Mom will be here soon, go read over your numbers, your pie charts, whatever it is you business nerds do. I will call you before your meeting with Mom, relax, the park has only been open for an hour and a half. Also, tell Mitchelson he owes me twenty bucks." Blossom watched as her sister began clicking a few buttons on her phone before barking out orders.
One hour Buttercup. Otherwise she was coming down to the lab herself.
"If anything happens I'll be in my office, I have several missed calls." Blossom said coldly but Mitch knew it meant to watch every video feed for the Parasaurolophus. Not even ten am and it was already the day from hell. Maybe she would take up her sister's thought on having a second breakfast. Some delicious artery clogging bacon, fluffy scrambled eggs, and a nice thick slice of cheese sandwiched between toast slathered in butter sounded wonderful right now. The moment she sat down behind her desk, both her computer and phone pinged.
What happened now?
She had a few unread emails from HR about possible job candidates and if she wanted to meet with them. A few were from the Board of Twits asking her questions about the new asset. One was from Mayor. He knew how to send an email?
To: Blossom Utonium
From: Barney Mayor
Subject: Please Review
Attached: We need him (VID)
I found this and thought why not hire him as a handler? Tell me what you think.
Mayor
Clicking on the attachment, a video popped upon, the first shot being of a beautiful sunset where hues of reds, yellows, and oranges blended into one another. The silhouette of a lioness ran towards the setting sun in the distance, followed by another lioness. It was gorgeous. The savannah looked so peaceful compared to the shitstorm of a morning she was having. Maybe she could book a flight there and relax as the clouds drifted over head. The silhouette of a man came into view of the camera. He held his arms out wide, basking in the warm glow of sunset. A patch of grass nearby rustled causing Blossom to grip her phone tighter. What was the man doing just standing there in the open? A third lioness sprung from the grass, leaping towards the man. Though instead of attacking, the lioness propped her front legs on his shoulders, as if she were hugging him.
What?
The setting then switched to a man with shoulder length auburn hair wearing a faded red Henley. He smirked at the camera – which did not cause Blossom to take a sharp breath in – before calling out for one of the lionesses. She was gorgeous, her golden-brown fur looked inviting, tempting Blossom to reach out and pet her. She barely made out with the man said before the lioness opened her mouth wide. Once again, Blossom found herself bracing for impact as if she were the one in danger. The man reached into his back pocket for something Blossom couldn't make out but then he did the dumbest thing Blossom had ever seen. He had put his head basically inside the lioness' mouth. She wanted to look away from what she knew was soon to be his last breath but she couldn't she wanted to know what happened to him. The man began to brush the teeth of the lioness, humming a tune to calm down either the lioness or the viewer. She had just watched someone stick his head in a lion's mouth. Was this man insane?!
The setting shifted a few more times, showing this daredevil interreacting with different animals on the Serengeti; giraffes, wildebeests, gazelles, he even rode an elephant. Most of the clips showed him interacting with the lionesses. The first clip that showed the male lion had Blossom gripping onto the arms of her chair. The alpha would not take kindly to some outsider interacting with his pride, he'd see it as a challenge. The lion let out a terrifying roar before plopping itself down in front of the man, nudging its head against his legs.
When the video ended she quickly began typing out a reply. Who was this man? How did he get these animals to accept him? Millions of questions sped through her mind. What made him want to stick his head inside of a lion's mouth?
To: Barney Mayor
From: Blossom Utonium
Subject: RE: Please Review
Mayor,
After careful consideration, I would like to have more information about the individual in the video before going through with the hiring process. What are his credentials? Does he know anything about handling extinct animals? What is his name? I would gladly read over his resume and go forward with an interview, if he is a suitable candidate.
We can talk more about this later,
Blossom Utonium
The moment the small man stepped out of his helicopter, Blossom regretted ending her email saying they could talk about it later. All Mayor wanted to do was talk about the mystery man in the video. The entire elevator ride was spent with him wondering if the man would help them train the new assets. At least in her car she could hand him a tablet, distracting him with some app.
"Is it me or is it really hot out today?" her mother asked, pulling her dark red hair up into a messy ponytail, her curls cascading down.
"You've been in the AC too long." Blossom said, climbing into her car. Instead of blasting the AC, she rolled down the windows, "Might as well enjoy the somewhat cool temperature."
Her mother sent her a glare, "79 degrees should never be considered cool temperatures." Blossom chuckled, handing over the laminated folder as she sped out of the parking garage.
"Stocks this quarter have been on the rise we are up 3.2% as of right now. Attendance has been steadily increasing and we estimate ticket sales will continue to escalate as we begin to promote the new assets more and more. I forwarded you the ads Marketing has come up with and starred my personally favorites. They want to run commercials on-"
"Can we go see the dinosaurs in the river? I love that one." Mayor interjected. "I have my lifejacket with me." The two women in the front seats looked down at their outfits, they hadn't been expecting going to an exhibit where you had to kayak. Blossom could swing by the employee district, grab a set of clothes for her and her mother to wear on the attraction.
"Wouldn't you rather ride the Gyrosphere." Her mother started but at the mention of the Gyrosphere, Blossom ignored the rest of the conversation. The Parasaurolophus! How could she forget about the Parasaurolophus?! Right, a guy sticking his head in a lion's mouth.
"Sorry but do you mind if I make a quick call?" Her mother nodded and Mayor went back to playing whatever game she had on her tablet. She clicked the phone symbol on her steering wheel and said to call BC's work number.
"Morning Commander-in-Fossils." Her mother tutted at the tone of her second daughter's voice.
"Good morning sweetheart."
"Am I on speaker phone?" Buttercup asked, her voice distorted slightly by background noise on her end.
"About this morning." Blossom started, glancing at her mother out of the corner of her eyes, "Did breakfast go well?"
Buttercup mumbled the question again to herself, but after a few moments said, "Right! Yes, breakfast went well. And by went well I mean we know what's wrong." Blossom stopped short as her mother frantically began asking what was wrong with the park. Did her sister not understand code?! Of course she did! They did it all the time to keep from getting in trouble.
"The Parasaurolophus is fine, just upset. Her child" Blossom could hear the emphasis on the word, "was taken in for checkups yesterday and the Parasaurolophus is missing her." Blossom sighed with relief, it wasn't too bad. The checkups would wrap up around noon. Some of the older dinosaurs in the park adopted the younger ones as their own, teaching them how to adapt to life outside the nursery. "Did you not get my messages?"
"No sorry, I got distracted by a video Mayor sent me-"
"WE SHOULD HIRE HIM!" Again, they had no clue what his name was. Buttercup began asking something Blossom couldn't make out. "I'll forward it to you later. Can you stop by Bubbles and pick her up for lunch? We're going to be on one of the attractions."
"As the Commander wishes." Sometimes she wished she was an only child.
As she looped passed one of the buildings in the employee district her phone chirped, signaling someone had sent her an email. Blossom rolled her eyes, but continued her run. It was a little after 8 pm and was her first night off all week, she was not in the mood to deal with her job. After a few more steps, her phone chirped several times. Some of the chirps blending into the next. Groaning, Blossom stopped running to deal with whoever was desperately trying to get in touch with her. Slipping off her armband, Blossom removed her phone from its plastic encasement. The notification screen read '11 emails'.
"Fucking hell." Unlocking her phone, she quickly opened her email application. Eight were from Mayor each with exuberant subject lines, one was from HR confirming the hiring of an ACU official, and one was from a department store informing her a sale was coming up. The final email was from a name she hadn't recognized. She quickly skimmed through the emails from Mayor. Each email was written in capitals letters asking if she had hired him? Hired who? The guy in the video? They hadn't even known his name.
To: Blossom Utonium
From: Brick Johnson
Subject: Application for Handler
Attached:
To Miss Utonium,
Your boss reached out to me earlier about a job opening for someone with experience handling "dangerous animals". He saw a video of me at the Serengeti National Park and informed me to forward my resume to you directly rather than apply through your website.
Brick Johnson
How had Mayor found him so fast? Right, very wealthy, no problem finding anyone.
Involuntarily, her hands clenched. He had gone over her head to hire someone. He may be CEO but she was the one who physically ran the park. If anyone was to reach out to someone it should be her! Shouldn't it? She was here every single day, sorting out all problems to ensure operations ran smoothly. Who even was Br? Obviously he was daring enough to be a dinosaur trainer, but did he have experience with a prehistoric jungle? Probably not, they were the only establishment to host living dinosaurs.
There was the possibility he may have some background in paleontology. Ever since the park opened, degrees in genetic biology and paleontology have been at an all-time high. Resigning herself to reading over his resume, Blossom noticed he had a Masters in Zoology and had been working for the national park since graduating three years ago. While studying for his joint baccalaureate/masters, Brick worked for a local zoo. And during his last two years of high school, worked at a place called Pet Palace. Ten years of experience caring for animals and thankfully he had not listed caring for his parrot as part of his experience, like a different applicant. He had been a member of several honor societies and he graduated Summa Cum Laude (like herself).
What she couldn't let go was the fact he had no previous experience with dinosaurs. While in college, she had been a double major, business and paleontology.
But Mayor seemed keen on hiring him. Who else would go into a cage with one of the deadliest creatures ever in existence?
She typed his name into a search engine to find out more about the daredevil. Very few articles came up, half of which were his social media pages displaying the wonders of the Serengeti. She thought there would be more on the "Lion Whisperer" as someone in a comment had dubbed him. One article boasted about his skill in protecting the wildlife in Africa while another spoke of his ability to connect with anything in the animal kingdom.
To: Brick Johnson
From: Blossom Utonium
Subject: RE: Application for Handler
Good Evening Mr. Johnson,
We do not have an opening for a "dangerous animal" handler, what we are looking for is a handler for an up-in-coming exhibit featuring Velociraptors. They were – are – one of the greatest hunters in existence. I had viewed your video as well, and I must say you definitely have the moxie we're looking for, but I fear your lack of experience with Velociraptors. If you are still interested in this position, I would like to set up a meeting with you.
Blossom Utonium
Right as she slipped her armband back into place, her phone chirped once again. Was Mayor sending her another email about hiring this man? Had he already responded. The phone chirped once more. Maybe it was both?
To: Blossom Utonium
From: Barney Mayor
Subject: THANK YOU
HE SAID YOU EMAILED HIM BACK ABOUT SETTING UP AN INTERVIEW! NOW ALL WE NEED IS TO FIGURE OUT WHERE TO HOUSE HIM!
MAYOR
That was not all they had to figure out! First she had to interview him, make sure he was a decent person. Reach out to his references! He needed to learn about raptors! He had no idea what they were like!
To: Blossom Utonium
From: Brick Johnson
Subject: RE RE: Application for Handler
Miss Utonium,
I know I lack experience in regards to raptors, but I am more than willing to learn. When can we set up a meeting?
Brick Johnson
More than willing to learn. She let out a groan. Dammit. Mayor was going to get what he wanted and she was going to have a man's blood on her hands. The main handler for the Mosasaurus had worked on her development. He had been there every step of the way and wanted to be out in the field, watching something he helped create grow. The most of handlers who worked in the Aviary had degrees in biology but had enrolled in college courses online to become acquainted with the dinosaurs. The main Tyrannosaurus handler was a paleontologist who specialized in all things Tyrannosaurus Rex, while her beta was previously a geneticist who specialized in extinct apex predators. The candidate for Velociraptor handler trained with jungle cats.
Hopefully this would work.
To: Brick Johnson
From: Blossom Utonium
Subject: RE RE RE: Application for Handler
Mr. Johnson,
Is this Thursday at noon fine?
Blossom Utonium
What had she done?
"Can I make a compliant about someone who started yesterday?" Blossom let out a sigh. She hadn't even had the chance to take a sip from her tea.
"Good morning to you too BC." The tea needs more sugar.
Buttercup marched over to where her sister was nestled, in the corner of a café in the lobby of their building. The booth Blossom occupied was covered in paper and the redhead jotted down notes in the margins. Plopping herself onto the seat opposite her sister, Buttercup began a tirade of the newest ACU employee.
"He's loud, he's brash, he's telling me how to run my maneuvers, MINE. I am the one in charge of my team not him! I'm usually the one newbies shadow but I had to dump him on Harry. He's been here for not even a day and I've already threatened to use my tranquilizer gun six times. Six!"
"Uh huh, that's nice BC." Blossom mumbled, her focus on the papers in front of her rather than her sister. Lime green eyes narrowed into a glare, just willing her older sister to look up.
"I had sex in the MVU."
"Sounds like fun."
"I stole an embryo and sold it to Morebucks."
"Okay, that's fine."
"I killed a man."
"Uh huh, I'll get right on that."
With an aggravated sigh, the brunette swiped her arm across the table, papers sliding every which way. A curt, "Hey!" was uttered as Blossom tried to collect and re-organize the papers into proper piles. Marketing was on the right, plans for the Velociraptor paddock in the middle, Internet searches of Brick Johnson to the left. Buttercup reached out grabbing a random sheet. A man with wavy, auburn locks, piercing red eyes, and a devilish grin smirked up at her. Her eyebrow raised in response. What was her sister looking at? Skimming through the few, short paragraphs below, she surmised the man worked at an animal sanctuary and was a prominent figure in the study of African wildlife. Smart and good looking, Blossom sure knew how to pick 'em.
"We stalking someone? He's kinda cute." Blossom's cheeks flushed as she snatched the paper back. She wasn't stalking, she was researching, there was a difference! She was going to be trusting him with the care of several very expensive assets, she wanted to make sure he was legit. So what if he happened to be 'kinda cute.'
Yet why were there so little notes on such an integral part to the conservation world? "Did you hear anything I said before?"
"Yea something about ACU and MVU helping a man."
Buttercup shook her head, of course she wasn't listening she was too busy doing whatever it is nerds do to attempt to find a nerd mate. Buttercup glanced down again at the three piles her sister had created. Maybe, she could take her complaint to HR instead, Blossom already seemed to have her hands full. The redhead should utilize her assistant more, what was her name, Randy? Rhonda? Something with an R – probably. Blossom took on everything on her own, rather than hand it off to someone else.
"Is that the new ad campaign?"
Blossom muttered something Buttercup couldn't make out and handed the pile over to the brunette. Flipping through, the brunette saw several different pitches, some good, some decent, but most horrific. Judging from what Marketing was turning out, Buttercup would not go out and buy a ticket. "I tried speaking to Mom about the ones I liked and which ones she did but all Mayor wanted to talk about was him instead." Blossom grumbled, tilting her head towards the pile with the picture of the male redhead. "Was dubbed by a follower on some social media site the "Lion Whisperer". Stuck his head inside its mouth. Mayor wants me to hire him. The Board of Twi-rustees wants me to send them where we are on the Raptors and Marketing, god Marketing. I have to send them my notes, hopefully they'll have more for me by the end of the day."
After setting up their interview the previous night, Mr. Johnson had sent her a list of six references, three work related references and three personal references.
Roger L. Jackson, Director General Serengeti National Park
Jim Cummings, co-worker at Serengeti National Park, specialized in primates
Chuck McCann, Head bacteriologist at Megaville Zoo
Jennifer Hale, family friend, boss at Pet Palace
Jeff Bennett, classmate at UC Santa Barbara
Tom Kane, family friend
Blossom groaned, dropping her head into her hands. She had to get in contact with the six of them and find more information on this "Lion Whisperer" all by Thursday. What had she done? HR had a whole team of people whose job it was to make calls or emails to references. Her job involved making sure the park didn't implode daily. Typing in the first number for a Roger L. Jackson, her phone and computer both chirped. The subject line of the email read "Urgent: Roof Now". Guess she had to call them later.
Quickly, Blossom took a screenshot of document Brick had sent her. Any chance she had today she would call them. Rushing to the elevator, Blossom opened her clock application to figure out the time difference between them and the Serengeti National Park. Eight hours ahead. That meant she'd have to call them now to ensure the employees hadn't gone home for the day.
"Fuck."
The elevator doors slid open, Mayor's helicopter making its descent onto the helipad. Quickly opening the email, the text was the same as the subject line, "Urgent: roof now". What was wrong?
Mayor hoped out of the elevator and rushed towards Bl, talking a mile a minute about their new hire. The ACU hire? Or had he meant the man Blossom was interviewing on Thursday. Currently not an employee. What was Mayor's fixation with the man? Yes, he stuck his head into a lioness' mouth, yes he was hugged by another (or was it the same lioness?), yes the only male in the pride doesn't see him as a threat to the pride infrastructure. But come on there had to be other people in the world just as crazy as he was, why was Mayor fixating on this one?!
Her mother climbed out of the helicopter, her hair whipping about in front of her face. "Good morning sweetheart, what are you doing up here? We were just heading down to breakfast before a meeting with your father." An email told her to be on the roof ASAP and what was this about a meeting with her father? Why hadn't she been informed of it?
As if reading her mind, Mrs. Utonium placed a hand gently on her daughter's shoulder, "Mayor wants to make sure the girls are going to be very scary." The end of the sentence spoken in Mayor's bumbling voice, "Needn't worry darling, no qualms. Just go back to doing whatever it was you were doing." Watching the retreating backs of both her mother and her boss, Blossom let out a groan. "Urgent, he fucking said urgent."
Right before the door leading back into the Control Tower shut, the shorter man threw the door open with enough force it banged against the wall. "I FORGOT! I only found out about this last night and I need you to make arrangements urgently, write this down." Without missing a beat, Blossom pulled her tablet and its stylus from her bag, "It was brought to my attention November 14th is National Pickle Day. I need an event planned in honor of such a luxurious event." Mayor began listing off inane ideas to celebrate his joyous holiday while Blossom's grip tightened on her stylus. She ignored the faint cracking noise. His urgent message was about National Pickle Day?! He couldn't have just sent her an email explaining what he wanted? Instead, he had to make it seem as if a comet was hurtling towards Earth to kill the dinosaurs again.
A squeal of joy came from the short male as he looked up at Bl, "Just imagine all the fun we could have. I need an initial itinerary in my hand by the end of the week, we only have a few months to prep for such an important holiday." As gracefully as he had come out, Mayor raced back into the Control Tower.
He wanted her to prepare for National Pickle Day? What have the Tyrannosaurus Rex dressed up as a giant pickle and have pickle juice flowing through the Cretaceous Cruise? Blossom had very little time to plan this holiday event. She had t-minus 48 hours before this meeting with Mr. Lion Whisperer himself. And the window between now and four raptors was steadily shrinking. Regretting it, Blossom opened up her email application.
To: Buttercup Utonium, Bubbles Utonium, Robin Synder, Mike Believe, + 3 more
From: Blossom Utonium
Subject: Happy Holidays
I was just informed our park is going to be celebrating National Pickle Day. It's November 14th and I need to have an initial itinerary (already?) in my hand by Friday. Ask anyone in your department, or anyone you know if they have any ideas. No idea is a bad idea. Can be emailed to either me or my assistant. Currently my list of ideas is as such
1) ?
2) ?
Blossom Utonium
After scanning over the screenshot, Blossom punched in the number for Roger L. Jackson. She would call Mr. Jackson on her way to the Gallimimus Valley. After a few rings, a gruff voice was heard over the phone.
"Hello? Who is this?"
"Good morning, well afternoon Mr. Jackson. My name is Blossom Utonium, I'm the Operations Manager at Jurassic World. Brick Johnson put you down as one of his references and I was wondering if you weren't too busy, could I ask a few questions about him?"
Shuffling of papers were heard on the other side of the line and the voice grumbled out a "very well then."
"First I would like to verify the dates of his employment and his position within your company." Pushing open the doors to exit the Control Tower, the heat seemed to escalate tenfold within the few minutes she had been indoors. Thankfully she had parked in the shade, her car would be slightly cooler. Across from the Control Tower, a monitor read the temperature was already at 89 degrees Fahrenheit, then converted it to 32 degrees Celsius. 32 degrees, she sighed. 32 degrees used to mean snowy weather, a mug of hot chocolate with extra marshmallows, and her cute little pink snow boots. Now it meant carry a water bottle constantly so you don't pass out. Sometimes she regretted leaving her hometown.
"Brick Johnson was employed by us, the Serengeti National Park, where he was employed as a caretaker here. He started here after college, about three years ago and has been employed here ever since he graduated." Putting the car in park, Blossom pulled Brick's resume and a pen out of her bag and placed a checkmark next to his claim of being at the national park for three years.
Right as she was about to ask her next question, Mr. Jackson went on a very repetitive tangent about how the national park wasn't a company but a conservation center. Glancing at her car's dashboard, Blossom let out a groan. This was going to be a long day. Eventually she succeeded in getting answers out of Mr. Jackson to both corroborate what Mr. Johnson had listed on his resume and help develop his character. She also hoped she would never have to hear Mr. Jackson speak ever again. That conversation should have been three times shorter.
As she was about to step out of her car to check on the Gallimimus Valley, the main handler knocked on her window. "That looked like a very stressing phone call and figured just hand delivering my report to you would be easier than having you come and check everything out. We still need a botanist to come check out that weird plant near the end of the Valley, but other than that everything is looking good. I'm going down to the lab right now to check on one of the girls who had been taken in for her leg last week. I can send you the information later if you want?" The handler gave a small wave before jogging over to her car. Shooting a quick email about a paleobotanist still needed to check out an anomaly in the Valley, Blossom typed in the next number to call.
This time a loud, drawl was heard on the other side of the line, "Hello?"
Introducing herself and explaining why she was calling once again, Blossom was ready to ask the same questions when she heard a rough, "What y'all want with him?" She quickly noted down his tone. Did Mr. Cummings not like Mr. Johnson?
"Mr. Johnson applied for a position here-"
"You already said that." The voice clipped. Rude.
Running a hand through her hair, tousling her tresses Blossom glared at her reflection in her rearview mirror. She hoped this conversation wouldn't be as taxing as the last one. Was that a banjo in the background?
"So what y'all want with him?" the man repeated. Calming breath Bl, she told herself, in through the nose out through the mouth. She began asking questions about Mr. Johnson's character and Mr. Cummings would begrudgingly answer them. Mr. Cummings was going over Mr. Johnson's work performance but Blossom could barely focus. His voice was earsplitting, she lowered the volume on the phone call yet she still found herself reaching one hand into her purse for ibuprofen.
"The kid's smart, an idiot, but still smart. Willingly hugging them lions like they was a Tabby cat." That definitely was a banjo in the background, "But the kid's resilient. No matter what happened the day before, he was ready the next day to try again."
Interesting response for a reference. She's never heard a reference say the candidate was an idiot, yet you should still hire them. Especially when explaining the candidate's strengths. Maybe she should have asked about his strengths and weaknesses. "In your opinion, how did Mr. Johnson react to stressful situations?"
Based on what Mr. Cummings was saying, Mr. Johnson would have no qualms being in a paddock with four Velociraptors. Then again, watching his video anyone with eyes could assume he'd be open to entering a paddock with apex predators. In the middle of Mr. Cumming's sentence, Blossom's phone beeped, indicating someone had sent her a message. "What in tarnation was that?!"
"I apologize, I received a message, could you repeat what you were saying?"
Blossom groaned after clicking the End Call button. Two references in and she was ready to hand in the metaphorical towel. One repeated himself as if no one heard what he said the first twelve times, the other was loud, brash, and playing a banjo. She made her way down the rest of the list, a male who sounded like he frequented a speakeasy, a woman who spoke in full about grooming products, and a city slicker who went into detail about how Mr. Johnson tutored he and a few colleagues back at UC Santa Barbara, assisting in raising their grades by two letters. She had to give him credit, she had worked in the tutoring center in college. Mr. Johnson had an interesting array of references. They all had unique personalities and each raved about Mr. Johnson, excluding the comment about him being an idiot.
Then Tom Kane and his falsetto answered.
To: Blossom Utonium
From: Buttercup Utonium
Subject: RE: Happy Holidays
As much as I love the old geezer, can we lock him in one of the offices with a hundred pickle jars while some poor intern dresses up as a pickle? Maybe have s/he sing and dance? He enjoys National Pickle Day while the rest of us normal people ignore the so called, "holiday".
Buttercup Utonium
Signing into her Skype account, Blossom mentally prepared herself for this interview. At least the past candidates who were unsuitable had no experience whatsoever with dangerous species. Brick at least gained the trust over a whole pride – and an elephant Blossom desperately wanted to ride. Her questions had been printed out and rested on the desk in front of her. Though she had asked these questions enough times that she knew them by heart. Blossom expected by the end of the interview they would still have an opening for main Velociraptor handler. Then again Mayor was promoting his application, if he didn't get the job she would have to deal with the short man's whining. On a sticky note she wrote down to buy a crate of pickle jars.
The computer application made a noise as it logged in and under her Contacts saw Mr. Johnson was already online. Time to get this over with. The application rang out as it called Mr. Johnson, the three dots asking her to wait soon were replaced with a handsome visage. Shit, she forgot he was cute.
"Good morning Mr. Johnson." She said curtly, brushing a lock of hair behind her ear, "I would like to start this interview by asking you several questions. After you are more than welcome to ask any questions you may have on your part. Sound good?"
"Yes ma'am." Fuck he should not smirk like that. Blossom could feel her cheeks heating up and hoped the thin level of foundation she had applied earlier would hide her blush. Judging by the deepening of his smirk, she had no such luck. She hadn't even started questions and she already wanted to hang up and have HR do this. Then again after HR interviewed a handler, she always followed up with a second interview herself.
"Tell me about yourself."
Blossom watched as Mr. Johnson's smirk slightly fell, "I have a degree in Zoology, spent the past three years working for the Serengeti-" he rattled off information Blossom already knew.
"Can you tell me what's not on your resume?" His eyebrows raised slightly, maybe at her or at the question, before running a hand through his hair. At least he brushed it, in every picture or video she had seen his hair was mussed.
"Judging from the video, you saw me hanging out with the lionesses. It took a while for them to warm up to me. A mentor I had at the park would drive out with me and basically introduce me to all the girls. It was terrifying and exhilarating at the same time. The one hugging me in the video was the first to accept me and was the main consort of the male lion. Said male lion hated me when he first met me, saw me as a threat to both his pride and his lady friend. Sunk his claws into my shoulder." She watched as he absentmindedly traced his fingers over his left shoulder. "I thought I was gonna die. Honestly. He could easily take me down. As much as I love the story, I'm no Tarzan, can't fight off a jungle cat. My mentor took me back to the hub, cleaned me up, and the next day he brought us back out to the pride. Told me 'fear is temporary and chicks dig scars. Go make a friend.'" A small chuckle was heard on both ends of the screen, "I went out every day, the lionesses backing me up until finally one day the male lion accepted me.
"The gazelles were the hardest to assimilate with because I smelled like the lions. They saw me as a predator and would run whenever I came near."
Blossom nodded, "That answers me next question, how'd you get a lion to let you into his pride?" The male before her gave her a soft smile in response. Blossom knew what her next question would be, 'why should we hire you?' but instead she found herself asking, "What possessed you to stick your head in a lion's mouth?"
Mr. Johnson, let out a chort nodding his head slowly, "Get that one a lot. Adrenaline mostly, some stupidity, but I also knew she wouldn't hurt me same as I would never hurt her. Again, it was mostly pure adrenaline and stupidity." At least he was honest. Tearing her eyes from the screen she jotted down some notes on her print-out. When she looked back up, her eyes met his and he seemed nervous. What was there to be nervous about? Talking to Blossom was nowhere near as terrifying as sticking your head in a lion's mouth. At least she thought so.
"Do you see yourself and the lions as equals? Is that why you knew she wouldn't hurt you?"
"Not really, they're more in control than I am. I like to think we're equals that way I stay alive, you show fear you're done with. Whether it be lions, cheetahs, or even Velociraptors, if we disregarded our reliance on technology and our opposable thumbs, we would not be top of the food chain. These are living creatures designed for hunting. I knew she wouldn't hurt me because we have a mutualistic relationship, I gained her respect by protecting her from poachers. She in turn protected me from a cheetah I hadn't become acquainted with at that point."
Blossom scribed down what he said, "You're not equals?"
"No, they deserve our respect." She smiled at what he said before jotting that down as well, she could agree with that. Blossom brushed aside her bangs, her rose colored eyes taking in everything that wasn't verbally being said. A finger on Brick's left hand twitch, while his eyes seemed to dull in color under her scrutiny.
"Are you willing to do a crash course in all things Velociraptors? This will be grueling. I will have a co-worker begin preparations and teach you. This isn't going to be like in college where you'll have a few classes a day. You will be learning from the moment the park opens to the moment the park closes. That's fourteen hours a day. We have a very limited window before the eggs hatch and you would need to imprint on them the moment they are born. We need them to trust you, to respect you. The sooner the better. Can you handle that?"
"Does this count as schooling for my PhD?" he joked but she set her mouth in a hard line. She watched as he swallowed a lump in his throat. "I understand what I know about Velociraptors is limited to the belief they are the ancestors of chickens and that they are supposed to be extinct. I was able to be accepted by a pride of lions and although it isn't shown in the compilation video, I was also accepted by a coalition of cheetahs. I have pictures somewhere on my phone, I can show them to you if you want." Blossom didn't mention she had already seen the pictures, having scrolled through his social media pages. "I believe I can be accepted by the raptors as well."
"Can you handle it?" Blossom reiterated, her rose colored eyes locked with his piercing crimson ones.
"Yes."
To: Mike Believe
From: Blossom Utonium
Subject: I just made the worst mistake of my life
As the subject line says. I'm going to need you to kill me, but first help me sort out this mistake before you kill me.
Blossom Utonium
To: Blossom Utonium
From: Mike Believe
Subject: RE: I just made the worst mistake of my life
Sorry, can't kill people, part of my New Year's resolution, partway there can't break the resolution now.
Will help fix whatever this mistake is, in exchange you help a socially inept male (me) get a date with a wonderful, exuberant female (Robin).
Mike Believe
To: Mike Believe
From: Blossom Utonium
Subject: RE RE: I just made the worst mistake of my life
What's the point of you being my friend if you won't kill me when I make mistakes? Is it cause I'm not your bff? I can dye my hair blonde.
There is a possibility I hired a Velociraptor handler who knows nothing about said dinosaurs. Or dinosaurs in general. Mayor wanted him desperately after seeing a video of him sticking his head in a lion's mouth. I'm transferring you from your paddock for the next few weeks. It'll give Cavadini a chance to say goodbye to Rexy. Teach him anything and everything about the raptors to the point where he can write a dissertation on them by the time they hatch. I'll also have my father teach him whenever he's free, can't drag you away from Rexy for too long.
As of right now he's the only raptor handler and you're the only person I know who is both ballsy (stupid) enough to get in a paddock and educated enough to know the inner workings of Velociraptors. Watch over him while I attempt to find a beta handler who knows more than "they're supposed to be extinct".
I can't do that. Robin isn't even in this hemisphere! Aren't her and Mitch seeing each other?
Help me Obi-Mike Kenobi, you're my only hope,
Blossom Utonium
To: Blossom Utonium
From: Mike Believe
Subject: RE RE RE: I just made the worst mistake of my life
Don't dye your hair, just wait til next year. I'll have a new resolution by then.
Is he hot? Is that why you hired an idiot? Never mind, I'm calling your sisters because I know you're gonna lie and say no. But I guess I can teach Mr. Probably-Too-Pretty-To-Learn how not to die. I need at least two hours a day with Rexy, you know I'll miss her too much. Gotta say goodbye to Cavadini, will miss her too.
Mitch said their date was awkward and most of it was drinking tequila rather than talking. Thanks for getting us all hooked on tequila btw. And fine because you're obviously in so much need of assistance you pulled out a Star Wars reference on Mr. Vader himself, I will help you. Even without you setting up this date.
Obi-Mike. Now that's a name I have not heard in a long time. A long time,
Blossom Utonium
To: Mike Believe
From: Blossom Utonium
Subject: RE RE RE RE: I just made the worst mistake of my life
Attached: We need him (VID)
His appearance had nothing to do with it. When have I ever done that. I hire qualified handlers. Usually. Just watch this video Mayor sent me. You'll understand why he's spammed my email every single day telling me to hire him.
I could work with two hours a day. I'm already making up a timetable for when he'll meet with you and when he'll meet with my father. Mr. Johnson flies in on Wednesday. Be prepared to become Professor Believe.
You got me hooked on Star Wars, I got you hooked on tequila. Fair trade.
Also, Robin is looking forward to a second date… Guess as a good best friend I should stock up on ice cream before she gets back.
Blossom Utonium
To: Blossom Utonium
From: Mike Believe
Subject: RE RE RE RE RE: I just made the worst mistake of my life
I would make a comment about the title of the video but you mentioned it's from the small man in charge. And every day? I would have deleted my email. What time Wednesday? I'm stuck washing Rexy because a patron (who was forty-two, by the way) heard me say "hell" in the men's room to Mitch. Cavadini thinks she's tough, but I get to spend time with my favorite girl so it's not a punishment at all.
Question, is appearance completely aside or no? Because as a man who is usually pretty confident in his looks, that man makes me want to go climb into a well.
THAT IS NOT A FAIR TRADE! ONE DOESN'T DESTROY YOUR LIVER!
Guess I should stock up on ice cream too. But that's just cause I like ice cream.
Mike Believe
To: Blossom Utonium
From: Mike Believe
Subject: RE RE RE RE RE RE: I just made the worst mistake of my life
I'm going to be showing him around on Wednesday, get him used to the park, then whenever you're free you can start the crash course. I swear if you make a comment about me showing him around I will fire you. I have the incident report said forty-two year old made about harsh language used by staff. Then you can't clean Rexy because you shall be back stateside.
I shouldn't have to answer that.
You just have a weak liver.
Blossom Utonium
Challenge: Try writing a Jurassic Park AU while watching Magic Mike Believe XXL. All I wanna do is move my hips to Pony but my brain isn't letting it rain men D:
THEY AIRED SEASON THREE OF RICK AND MORTY!