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Sinister Attractions
by: Alisx123@yahoo.com
It seemed darker than usual tonight as Remy looked out his bedroom window chewing tastelessly on the toasted bagel with sour cream spreading and bologna in the middle. He wasn't in a good mood tonight and he knew why though his weakness embarrassed him. He had always been a man for living it up at night and when he was kid he even cleaned up his room only when it was dark outside because that was when he felt the energy in him to do so. When his deep blue eyes blazed into a deep bloody red color he had begun to see the day as a time of pain since his new eyes were unusually light sensitive. As he grew to become more sexually experienced than sexually anticipating, Remy saw the night as fun and a time to play. Some people saw sex in the afternoon or morning as a turn on but to him the conventional heat of the night was the best and he still did.
For him, the night meant sex, women, parties, fun, and a cover to save him from anything. In light a normal person would feel safer but he could see even better at night with his demonic eyes and his body experienced more pleasure at that time anyway. Everyone who grew up with him knew of his sexual exploits and the women were happy about it and he was good at what he did. It wasn't to be cheap or greedy or just plain hardcore to get his rocks off. Remy was naturally a sexual person who felt really alive and could express himself only when he was making love to someone who loved him. And that was only rule: the person had to love him even if he didn't return it because he liked to be loved and all he did his whole life was make love to beautiful women whom he didn't love back. Now, he had finally found a woman he actually loved with all his heart and wanted more than anyone and she just had to be Rogue.
Rogue. Beautiful, sexy and innocently naive in a tortured sort of way if one looked past her frustrations and anger. Mon Dieu, he wanted her so bad it was torture and going to some hotel with a woman he didn't know wasn't going to satiate his hunger for her. It might help him forget for an hour or so but he'd still think of her while that other woman told him how much she loved him and wanted him. Women fell for him so fast because of his looks and charm power that he didn't really want to hear the three words anymore. It was scary because it reminded him that he was somehow using them because no matter how much they wanted him, some of that must be his charm power and he couldn't control it. God, he wanted Rogue and there was nothing he could do about it because she'd either run away from him in fear or start crying and he didn't want that. Seeing her cry was horrible since she was so proud and tears meant she was seriously hurt because Rogue doesn't cry for sympathy.
He fidgeted in frustration and stepped away from the window. Looking out at the trees wasn't suppressing anything and he was feeling rather uncomfortable. It's too hot in here… maybe I should take another cold shower. Ice cold. Ice cubes… Remy cursed inwardly and ran his hands through his hair. He just couldn't will it out of his system and he was feeling too pissed off to play solitaire or a game with one of the X-Men this time. His luck to fall in love with someone he couldn't touch. Maybe forgetting about it for just a few hours would be…. He cursed again and took a drag from a freshly lit cigarette.
Suddenly he sensed someone coming up behind him and he knew there was only the window behind him. Remy swiftly turned around to face the intruder and pulled a blazing card to the neck of the intruder. His red on black demonic eyes widened as they focused on a familiar friend he wanted to forget. "What de hell are you doing here?" He asked Vertigo in as calm a voice as he could manage through his frustrated and surprised interior. She simply walked over to him and took a drag from his cigarette. Bringing back some old memories, eh? Remy couldn't help put notice the way she took the cigarette in her inviting mouth and the ideas it brought out made him harden. He didn't bother to voice his thoughts as she sat down on his bed. "Nice place, Remy. And I'm just visiting, like, old friends do. Everyone wants you back, y' know." Vertigo crossed her legs and leaned back casually on the black silk sheets. They were probably cold because he hadn't been in it since last night but Remy had the feeling that they would warm up pretty fast with her on it. She always had a hot warmth to her or at least whenever he was around she had. That was one of reasons, other than the obvious, that they had been lovers when he was with the Marauders. His body heat was always high himself, but after he used his powers they sucked all the warmth from him and his insides were left empty. She certainly made him feel better at night but there wasn't anything between them other than the sex because she was with Riptide emotionally and he knew physically. Not that he had cared because he was never one for permanent relationships anyway, especially then. The things we did…
A delicious shiver went down his spine but he ignored it and took another drag from his cigarette. "Visit's over. I'm not in de mood to fuck around with you." *Yes, I am* Vertigo sat up and uncrossed her legs before standing up close to him. Too close. "You're making a damn fool out of yourself, Remy. What are you doing? Practicing abstinence? Why bother?" She took the cigarette from his mouth and took a long drag from it. Remy decided to let her keep the cigarette. He was going to quit anyway. Yeah, right. "Did you just come here to tell me dat? If so you can leave now." She smirked and tossed the cigarette out the window.
"I told you I came to visit and this visit isn't over yet. Feeling a little uncomfortable? Why don't you let me make you feel more at home." It wasn't a question. Vertigo pulled his head down to hers until their lips touched and her tongue ran over his lips and would have slipped inside if he didn't pull away. "Non. Get out, Vertigo. Now. " She grinned slyly and ran her hand down his nude muscled chest until it reached the rim of his red silk boxers. He wasn't wearing anything else because he usually slept totally nude on hot nights like this and that was only half referring to the weather. He had also taken a cold shower not too long ago to cool him off. It hadn't worked and Remy knew if he did now it wouldn't work either.
Her long silver hair framed her face and contoured her body. She wasn't wearing her Marauder uniform instead she had on a thin clingy tank top with short jean cut-offs. Too short. Almost as short as Remy's control right now. Vertigo was a dangerously alluring seductress with long lashed multi-colored swirls of colored eyes perfected with a sensuously full mouth. Her body was just as alluring with those full breasts he knew were soft and firm. She was blessed with long shapely legs that he remembered were at their best spread apart. A fleeting memory passed through him then and he stifled a groan as his erection grew even more persistent. He hated not having control though he wasn't a control freak, Remy just liked having things go his way because it was safer that way. He could adapt to changes and he was but with Vertigo here like this, well, it was driving him crazy.
"Where's Riptide and de others?" He asked deciding to change the subject and walked away from her damn seducing hands to drink a shot of Brandy on the dresser by the window. He looked outside as he felt her walk over to him and wrap her arms around his waist. Brazenly brushing his erection through the loose yet very confining at the moment, boxers.
"Not here. You're just as hot as you used to be, Remy. Everything Essex did wasn't totally bad, y 'know. You're still immortal, Remy and you owe him for that."
"You here to tell me that? Essex sent here?" He took a sip of the brandy and used his kinetic powers to warm the brew in his glass. Warm brandy was better than cold to his icy insides.
"No. I came here to visit. No one came with me or told me to come."
"Some visit. You're trying to seduce me." He took downed the rest of the brandy. His eyes were still focused on the stars, the trees. Anything but her. His body was doing enough of that.
"Yes." She admitted and pressed her body against his back. "I'm doing a good job though from the looks of that hard-on you got."
"I had that before you came and you aren't hiding anything yourself."
"I made it harder. If I didn't yet why don't I do some work on it and we'll see. What's a little sex between friends? We used to do it all the time."
He ran his hands through his hair and was mildly surprised when his hands met hers then. "I can't be your friend anymore, chere. I'm an X-Man now and dat ain't exactly de most proudest part of my life." Vertigo stopped massaging his scalp and tightened her fingers in his hair. "You don't mean that because if you did I should be pretty insulted. Second, nobody forced you to do anything you didn't want to. You know that and we know it. That's the real reason you left because you got scared of all you did. I don't see why. You were the best we ever had… The best I ever had." Remy knew she was capable of doing far more than pulling his hair if she was mad though that was from watching her work on others but he knew she wasn't angry at him. Vertigo sounded like she pitied him and that made him sick. She reminded him of Esse- Sinister. He kept on forgetting to call the man and the X-Men didn't call Ess- Sinister by his real name. Remy hated when he slipped like that. Nathaniel Essex was Sinister and that was a monster. Remy hated it because he worked for that monster and had become a monster in the process.
"Tell me I'm a monster, Remy and I'll leave." She said suddenly as if reading his thoughts. He knew she couldn't but she was right about their friendship. Sure they had fucked all the time but as sick as it sounded they were like brother and sister. All the Marauders were that way to him and so were the X-Men but he felt sick from what he had done with the Marauders. Though he could call himself a monster, he couldn't call Vertigo or Riptide or well, some of the others a monster as easily. They weren't monsters because they didn't care about people who didn't mean anything to them. It wasn't a good excuse but they weren't monsters and what they did wasn't even as bad as he did.
"You're not a monster." He stated as she massaged his scalp again though he didn't relax much. Remy turned around to face her and she ran her hands through his hair. He didn't say anything until she grinned and surprised him by asking what shampoo he used. "Shampoo?" He asked with pure shock for a second. "Uh, St. Ives something about Papaya. Why, you never cared before?" She shrugged and said it smelled nice. Her body pressed tighter against him and he didn't move away. He didn't want to. "When I kiss you now, Remy, I want you to kiss me back instead of think about that Rogue you have an eye on. If she wanted you, wouldn't she be here cuddling you instead of me? And don't give me that crap about her powers because cuddling can be clothes on. With us its clothes off but hey, not everyone can be perfect."
She lowered his head down to hers and kissed him hotly. A second or so later he returned the kiss and he pulled her body closer against him hungrily. It has been a long time… They pulled each other painfully tight against each other and ran their hands up the other's body. Remy's hands stopped at the thin rim of her tank top and ripped the skin tight material off of her when he couldn't slip his fingers underneath. She didn't seem to mind and Remy left her lips to trail a quick trail of kisses down to one of her breasts. Vertigo tilted her head back and moaned as he sucked on the hardened nipple of her left breast while his right hand caressed and teased her other nipple.
Breathlessly she suddenly said, "Remy, take me on your bed." He complied as she wrapped her long legs around his waist and her hands grasped his hair and shoulders. He was pretty much holding her up but though he didn't have super strength or anything it was easy despite her muscle weight. Hey, he was an expert and they were performing with a practiced grace that was still pure lust. She felt the silk underneath them warm up against her bare back and moaned again as Remy suckled and circled around her right nipple with his tongue. Vertigo reached down and grabbed his hard cock through the now burning hot silk boxers. "Um." She sighed as he groaned and she somewhat roughly pulled his face up to hers to kiss him lustily. He nibbled on her lower lip and she took him into her mouth again. Their kisses were rough and lustful and they were both left panting afterward but not complaining.
"I'm glad the X-Men haven't softened you up enough to ruin you at your best. Don't you dare hold back with me, Remy. Never did before and I hope you never will. I can take what you dish out and I hope you can still take me." They faced each other eye to eye as she spoke and Remy' s eyes sparkled amusingly to accept the challenge.
"I can and I will. As hot as I feel right now I'm not to sure if you can take dis though I'm more dan willing to test you out on dat." He pulled her head back roughly by her long hair and grinned as he shoved his velvety tongue into her mouth and she flicked it with her own. Her lips were grinning as well and she ran her nails lightly down his back. Not enough to draw blood but enough to shoot a dull pain through his nerves. His hand caressed her breast harder and her legs gripped his waist tighter. His erection burned into her crotch through the boxers and cutoffs she was wearing. It reminded him of something.
"Lose dose cut-offs, chere."
"Lose those boxers, Remy."
"I can' wit' your damn legs tearing into me like dis. You seem even stronger now dan before."
"I am." She unwrapped her legs from around his waist and undid the cutoffs. Vertigo slid them down her long legs and tossed them onto the floor somewhere. She wasn't wearing anything underneath it and Remy's eyes watched her reveal herself to him the whole way down. He twisted himself out of the boxers and threw them onto the floor also. Vertigo licked her lips and pulled him over to her and sucked on his neck as her hand pumped him rhythmically. His head tilted back and he groaned. One of Remy's hands cupped her breast while the other was wrapped around her waist. She trailed her kisses down his muscled chest and took a hardened peck into her mouth. Vertigo felt his breathing quicken with her own. Her tongue circled around the hardened node and she sucked on it. Her mouth then left his pecks to run a torturously long trail down his hard, muscled abdomen to meet with her pumping hand.
"You driving dis horny Cajun crazy, chere. Don' think I can sit up like dis for long." His thought was confirmed when Vertigo's tongue licked his head and ran up and down the length of him. Her tongue curled half way around his cock, caressing it and Remy felt a burning heat pass through his body. He moaned and his kneeling legs went slack a little but he tightened the muscles in his legs to hold himself up longer.
"You do your best work when you are horny."
"So do you." He said bending over her back to run his hands down her side and flick her between her slightly moist thighs. Vertigo's back arched and she sighed. She took his hard cock into her mouth and milked it up and down while he flicked her clit to the same rhythm with his finger. Remy groaned and flicked her faster and harder. The slick hardened switch swayed up and down against his knowing fingers and she cried out. Her body arched towards him and her ass was high in the air rubbing against his outstretched arm. Remy let his kinetic powers send a spark of heat through her and her arch turned more acute. The suction she was administering on his cock increased in its intensity and he felt himself slipping.
"Remy…" she moaned and he groaned as the vibrations sent a shiver through his body. Her fingernails dug into his thigh and her tongue circled his head while she sucked on him. The taste of his pre-ejaculation dripped into her mouth and she felt his body stiffen and then jerk as his free hand pushed her head roughly to his crotch. He didn't want her to stop. She couldn't stop if she wanted to anyway, which she didn't, and his gasping breathing on her back was really turning her on. His fingers stroked her to the core and she bucked against them. The slippier she got, the harder he rubbed her and the faster she sucked on him.
A wave of passion overcame her and Vertigo cried out Remy's name as her body racked with pleasure only a few seconds after Remy had cum into her mouth. His delicious taste filling her mouth and running only a little down her neck as she swallowed him. Heat flowed over their nerves and both of their supple muscles contracted as their hips pumped to a tempo all their own.
Vertigo was the first to rise from their lazy embrace, mostly because she was on top of him, and bent her head up to his for a long kiss. He responded the second her lips touched his and Remy' s silken tongue rolled over hers with an ease only he could manage so soon after their previous exertion. She took almost as much pleasure after their sex as she did during sometimes because he was so loose and lazily sexy in a way that had always turned her on. When he was Sinister's fave marauder back in the old days, she and him were always having sex somewhere and that was all it was. No feelings other than lust and sometimes anger but that made it all the more thrilling. Remembering that last time they had together before the Morlock Massacre. She had wanted him so bad after that job because killing people gave her a high that only Remy had seemed to match. Even though she didn't love him in any emotionally way other than as a friend, she strived off the high he gave her. With those red eyes it was like Satan himself was caressing her body and in the old days Remy's performance was pretty close to it being one of the best at everything he did.
She shuddered deliciously and the sparkle in her own mesmerizing eyes showed her lust for him was quickly reviving itself. Remy grinned a lazy but sly grin and she rubbed her inner thigh against his crotch, which quickly hardened against her. His relaxed muscles tightened and she grinned while she took his tongue into her mouth and ran hers over his lips. After their kiss broke he groaned and when he opened his eyes they had a feral look in them. It reminded her of the old days when Remy was acting like himself instead of repenting for something she knew he liked doing.
"Mon Dieu, y' still know how to kill a man, chere."
"And you always rise to the occasion."
"Touche."
Remy pulled her against him and ran his tongue down her neck, kissing the soft, warm skin along the way, as his cold fingers massaged her hard nipples. She moaned and her body arched against his electrifying touch… which, inhumanly intensified when Remy's cold fingers heated up with kinetic energy and the energy coursed through her nipples to her blood stream. Vertigo's eyes tightly closed shut and she grasped his head tighter against her throat as her other hand almost painfully grated the muscular arm that had so easily flipped her switch. She cried out and her legs tightened around his narrow waist.
The heat mixed with her own natural body temperature and heightened all her senses, including touch, and she felt the very core of her burn as Remy took the nipple into his mouth. Another passionately burning sensation coursed through her again and her heightened senses felt, smelled and could even taste his tongue circling around it so fast it even matched her beating heart. She moaned and ground herself against him which resulted in a rumbling groan from his throat. He was so hard he didn't think he could hold himself anymore and that thought intensified when he felt her wetness ground against his aching organ. A moan escaped his lips and Vertigo's lips were open in a cry of pleasure.
"Take me, Remy…" she breathed and moaned before continuing. "Don't hold back, I want to feel you really fucking me. I need to feel it, Gambit." Her fingernails grazed his arm deeply as he raised himself up and positioned himself over her to comply. His own lust caused her words to not reflect the meaning that she meant in his mind because it would have reminded him who he was with and what it signified about his so called "distance" from his past. It would have told him that one of the most sensuous aspects of him that women in general wanted in him was danger, the trouble he was that showed in his very eye color. Everyone had a side to them that appealed to the devil and to women; Remy was that demon who could light up their lives in way their bodies couldn't even comprehend. It was as addictive as a drug and Vertigo was hooked but Remy's own desire purposely blocked that mentality from him so he could continue with one of his favorite things to do.
He lowered himself onto her and felt the heated wetness of her caress him as he drove himself between the legs that hung onto him so tightly. Remy groaned as she closed around him inch by inch and she pumped her hips to pull him in deeper. She cried out his name and opened her eyes to see his tightly closed with his mouth agape. Vertigo raised one of her arms to pull his head down to hers and nibbled on his throat as a groan escaped from those luscious lips of his. He'd have a really bad hickey afterwards that he'd have to hide from the X-Men for a few weeks. Remy raised himself up with his arms so he slipped out of her hot opening and ground himself back into her. She raised herself with him to this motion and he repeated it over and over again while her assault on his throat intensified also. Her fingernails trailed red lines down his back but for the moment it was pleasure spiked with pain. Everything he did in his past, especially with Essex, was always that way. He did it for the high, to pay his dues, and when he realized what he had done in his life he blamed it on Esse- Sinister. But Remy didn't think about this as he drove his hardness deeper and deeper into her while they both cried out so loudly that if it wasn't for some outside help from a cottage on grounds all of the X-Men would have been in the room long ago and demanding answers to embarrassing questions.
Dangerous questions.
Remy pistol pumped himself into her until he couldn't hold himself together anymore and lost his essence into her. While he was experiencing an ecstasy that he had forced himself to try to withhold from ever since he realized how much he loved Rogue. Love could be without sex he had though and he still believed that because he loved Rogue and he hadn't really touched her at all except for that hot kiss when they thought they were going to die. He decided to ignore the events that happened afterwards whenever he thought about that moment.
Veritgo cried out his name one last time before she caught up with him in the ocean of lust that satiated both of their desires in life. Hers the ultimate high and his a need to let out some pressure and some frustrations. That was what it came down to between them: what they needed for themselves. Their times together had nothing to do with love not even as friends. It was a selfish need on both sides and as Jean Grey realized this she felt a wet tear slide down her cheek because she had never known that this type of selfish relationship was possible with Scott Summers as the only man she ever slept with (Is this true? I'm not sure! J .) Especially that someone she knew used someone like that and was so alone and… She couldn't even try to understand the life Remy had led or was leading. She sensed their cries calming down and Vertigo's pulse slow to a more normal rate. Despite her morals, Jean listened into the room that awoke her senses while she took a walk into the night.
That had called to her life a lone demon who needed someone to talk to, needed an angel. Confession…
Remy slumped over Vertigo and she relished in the feel of him in her as she turned his head up to hers for a kiss. He returned it lazily before stopping and turned away from her. Remy sat up and ran his hands through his hair to throw it back a bit before getting off the bed and downing a cup of brandy that was on the dresser. It was cold but it felt good going down his still heated body. Every cell in him felt dully alive though not as good as just a few minutes ago.
She sat up and took a cigarette from the half empty pack that was on his dresser. No one said a word as she lit a cigarette and took a slow drag from it. "You should do something stronger than cigarettes to keep that whollop of a night you pack under wraps. Go back to heroin."
"I don't take drugs anymore." He didn't even look at her as he spoke and then he turned towards her and raised an eyebrow. "Whollop? I don't think I've heard that word since school! You must really be high. What are you on?" She grinned and took another drag from the cigarette before getting up and giving it to him.
"You wouldn't want to believe me if I told you." She murmured and he took the cigarette and sniffed it. It smelled normal so she didn't do something to it. "What de hell are you talking about? Don't tell me Sinister sent you here to fuck me on drugs, Vertigo or I swear I'll kill you. You already fucked up my back and my arm and… shit, don't tell me you're taking blood samples or something!"
"Of course not, Remy. You're getting crazy again. Get some sleep and remember who your friends are. For the last time, Essex had nothing to do with me coming here. I had the urge to feel you so I came. You can be pretty addictive y'know." She pulled his head down to hers since he was tall enough to still stand a good 4 inches above her 5' 8" frame. He didn't respond at first but she continued until he joined in and they kissed each other with a need that possessed no love. Vertigo stopped the kiss after a few minutes and put on her clothes as Remy looked for his boxers. When he found it he put them on and turned to see her staring at him.
"What are y' staring at?" He asked slightly ticked off that she was just standing there staring at him. He felt dead inside. Like… like when he was working with Ess- Sinister.
"You want a relationship with that girl, don't you Remy?" She asked watching him stand up and tousle his hair. Not that it needed it. "No, I just make a fool out of myself for fun." His sarcasm was noticed by Vertigo who shrugged and turned towards the window as if to leave but then she turned around. "If you ever want me you now where to get me and quit blaming your problems on Essex. He didn't make you who you are, you did, and you're the best. The best there was."
"Don't leave yet, chere. Dis ole Cajun still got a few rises left in him, got nothing better to do all night anyway."
She looked tempted but shook her head. "Wish I could, Gambit, after all, having sex with a legend is alluring just by itself much less you being him bringing it up a few hundred notches. I really have to go because the others are probably going to kick my ass if I'm not there for the games tonight. Y' could come y'know, Remy. You're still one of us." He shook his head ad his hair fell into his face. He ignored it and his eyes blazed an evil red through the strands. "Quit saying that. Mon Dieu, I needed that tonight and y' still pack yourself a good bj, chere." He flashed her a grin and she returned it after they kissed each other one last time and Remy almost succeeded in taking her right there on the floor.
"Bye for now." She murmured and the swirling shades of her eyes turned dark as she slipped out his window and left the immediate area around the mansion. He didn't even bother to watch her leave because he knew she'd teleport in someway that the X-men's security wouldn't be able to sense it. Speaking of sensing, he remembered all the noise they were making just 10 minutes ago and unconsciously glanced at the bed. The top silk sheet was crumpled on the floor where they had lost it at some point and the pillows were everywhere. Everything residing around his bed was a mess and he knew that his room wasn't sound proof. Someone must have heard their groans but no one came. He would have felt them come into the room or at least seen them.
Then he felt the physic presence of Jean Grey inside the room just subtly as if it was slinking in the shadows and he automatically pushed her out of his room with his won telepathic powers. It was instinct and he didn't even know he did it until after wards. He cursed under his breath and jumped out his window, as crazy as it sounds, to see if she was all right. Remy only had to run all the way to the lake which lied somewhere between her cottage and the mansion. Jean had met him halfway holding her head but still walking fine.
They didn't say a word to each other and he saw tears streaking her face.
"You pack a strong power in that head of yours, Remy. Lucky for me that I was already leaving the room."
He shrugged and was about to shove his hands in his pocket when he realized he was wearing his boxers. Her eyes were watery and he wondered if he had hurt her that badly.
"I'm sorry but stay out of my room." He said and looked her straight in the eyes as he spoke. Now what do I do… I can't kill her. I don't do that anymore. His poker face was up and Jean couldn't sense anything from him just like in the room. Only Vertigo's mind was unshielded and let out the lust that allured her.
"I didn't mean to. I taking a walk and Ver-… her thoughts grabbed me. It was unfamiliar so I wanted to find out where it was coming from and I saw… it."
"How much?" His eyes burned into hers and she had the fleeting thought that he might kill her. This is Remy I'm looking at not a mar- er- murderer. Get a hold of yourself. She knew it was a probable lie but she believed it anyway. "Everything after you laid her onto your bed." Better to be honest, right?
Wrong.
He even blushed a little and Jean felt a little embarrassed for him but then she realized why his complexion reddened a bit. "Yeah, well, what did y' think?" She blinked in confusion and stared at him. "Think??" She pressed.
"Yeah," He repeated with his hair lying over his eyes and the burning red pupils staring into her. "What did y' think of my performance? Y' must have liked it since you kept on watching. Is Scott not treating you right? Y' want to get a real man, Jean?" His tone was cold and she stepped back.
"No, that's- Remy!… My love life is my business!" She knew she was blushing just as she realized the blush she saw on Remy was a trick to lower her defenses. He never blushed.
"Yeah, that's the way I like to live too." He was right and she knew it as he sat down on a large rock but still kept his devil eyes on hers. They seemed to be glowing and it chilled her to the bone every time she saw them like that. It was demonically mesmerizing. Like Vertigo. "I know and I'm sorry. I understand."
"No you don't." He lit a cigarette and took a drag from it. Jean looked at him expectantly and said, "How do you know what I don't understand?"
"I know that you weren't forced to live on the streets for reasons you don't remember when you were a baby. I know that you weren't forced to defend yourself against assholes who wanted to rape you and/or kill you just because you were in their streets. Just because you were smaller than them. You never had to kill people when you were a kid and you were raised with a family that you were born to. You never finally found a family and a home and engulfed yourself in it so much that it became you only to lose it to a sick brother-in-law who didn't want you to marry his sister because he wanted to fuck her himself. Then fuck you just to spite the pretty face that charmed his sister. You never felt that, never experienced leaving everything you ever cared about because you were told your very existence was jeopardy to your loved ones."
"Remy, please, I-"
"Shut up. I don't want to hear you tell me how you understand. You can't understand what it was like to relish in the feel of the searing heat of fresh blood sprouting from a new kill running over you like I have. I loved it! I hate myself for it. Y' know how many nights I wanted to kill myself with Essex? Y' have any idea how many times suicide crossed my mind as I led those killers to do my dirty work instead of feeling that glorious feeling again? I couldn't kill myself though and Essex knew it. He wouldn't have let me if I could anyway. I fight too hard to live all my life for a few really bad events to drive me over the edge." He turned to glare at Jean and stood up so he towered over her slightly. "You really don't trust me at all, do you? First Pyslocke goes traipsing in my mind and now you spy on me? I don't know why I had sex with her but I do know one thing: I haven't done anything to hurt the X-Men and I didn't invite her here."
Jean cupped his face between her hands and looked deep into the angry eyes she saw and saw hurt and anger. "I know how it feels to kill billions with my own two hands and suck their life from them for the hell of it. Scott might like to think it was Dark Phoenix's doing but I know it was me because she was a part of me and I was half in control. And you know what I see in your eyes, Remy; I know I see a lonely, hurt man who sells himself too short on everything but superficial aspects of himself. You might have done some pretty bad things in your past but I see you now and you're one of the most courageous, cockiest (smile, he smiled back), sweetest and thoughtful people I know and though I don't know by experience what you have experienced in your young life, I understand you."
He moved his head closer to her and kissed her on the side of her lips. She froze a little but then relaxed. After all, this was Remy who was a very physical person in showing how he felt about someone. She remembered when he gave Logan a hug one time. He was slightly amused but accepted it yet if it was anyone else they would have had a lot of explaining to do. Cyclops specifically told Gambit to keep his emotions in check after that "incident."
He winced suddenly when he was moving back and she remembered the scene she saw before. "Oh, yes," she said grinning and reached into her pocket. "Here's something to put on the hell she reeked on your bod." An eyebrow raised as he read the container which said HEALING SALVE and he grinned widely.
"Touche, chere. Still, I bet you never saw a rough ride like dat have you?"
"Actually I did once when I was younger on the naughty channels I shouldn't have been seeing at a friend's sleepover party. Yours looked more painful even though I was seeing it through Ver-… her eyes."
"Bad girl. Thanks I'll use it but only on the condition that you swear not to tell anyone she was here. They-"
"-won't understand. I get it. I promise but please do hide that hickey since everyone is going to wonder where it came from."
"Hickey?… Awh, shit. She always marks me somehow other than with those razors she calls nails. Y'know I think I got a few bruises on my waist too, she got pretty strong in the last year or so."
"But you liked it didn't you?"
He grinned and lolled his head to the side. "Word."
Jean shook her head and laughed. "You're such a teenager, Remy. Now go fix your broken ass before someone sees you all destroyed and sex crazed."
He was mildly surprised at her language but shrugged and walked away from her.
"Merci beaucoup, mon ange."
"You earned your retribution, Remy."
It was exactly what he needed to hear.
FINIS