Title: Kuroko no School
Genre: Crack/ Parody
Anime/ Manga: Kuroko no Basket
Rating: K (for Kise, Kuroko and any other character in the fandom starting with 'K' :3)
Summary: It was just supposed to be a normal school day for Kuroko and Kagami…
Warnings: Crazy chaotic crack and lots of cicada blocking. Please enjoy
A/N: Yueppi: I'M SO TIRED PLZ. Sorry for all this retarded myst-ness—IT IS MYSTTT!
This was done during a… 'Productive' free lesson. Please enjoy our randomness :3
One day Kuroko went to school. On the way, he met Kagami who was looking ever dashing jumping to school. When Kuroko greeted his teammate, Kagami surprised him by handing over a giant sized vanilla shake. "Oh… is this for me Kagami-kun?" Despite asking that, he had already snatched the shake and began ravenously gulping down the contents of vanilla-ness.
Before Kagami could yell out his casual greeting of 'THIS IS JAPANESE RUNCH TIME RUSH' he was spooked when No. 2 started to actually converse with him.
"Hey Derh" No.2 greeted the double eye browed giant.
"THIS IS JAPANESE RUNCH- wait… Oi! Kuroko, why is that dog talking?" Kagami screeched very unmanly like. 'Oh god, now that it had the capacity to talk he could be in the midst of planning my untimely decay!' he thought rather dramatically.
"Uhm" Kuroko replied once he had finished the delicious cold drink "Kise granted him the power of Perfect Copy, so now he can mimic all of Kiseki no Sedai" Kuroko informed the first year student.
In support of his owner's statement, No.2 began to casually stroll about on his hind legs.
"WH- HE CAN DO THAT?" exclaimed Kagami as he eye-zoomed the walking canine that had now donned a top hat and strutted his stuff around the small footpath.
Just as Kuroko was about to reply in a shadow-like way, Akashi from unknown whereabouts started his daily routine of firing his scissor cannon at random unsuspecting victims. His newly purchased deluxe custom-made cannon had the range of 100km + and had the capacity of 10 normal sized children's scissors (aka safety scissors). The glorious leader of the wonder-bolts (ER... whoops... you werent suppposed to know THAT!) Kiseki no Sedai today however, decided that he'd shoot specifically at the jumping high schooler.
"Tetsuya… how many times have I told you NOT to hang out with the double eye browed kangaroo?" Akashi glared at Kagami who had mysteriously been saved from the number of flying scissors of doom that Akashi 'secretly' launched.
"It wasn't Kagami who blocked those scissors Akashi" No. 2 perked up, an elusive air about the talking dog "It was me channelling the awesome power of Murasakibara's candy cicada blocking to deflect the scissors away from this area." The slightest widening of Akashi's crazy emperor eye gave away his momentarily surprised phase at the new voice.
[Somewhere in another district, poor Kise was surrounded by a bunch of highly deadly safety scissors]
(Warning: this is where it gets really crazy, strange and the plot totally loses its already lost focus so please block your eyes :3)
Before he could hold onto his awesome composer, Akashi wailed out the lines that would strike fear into the bravest of manly men "IF YOU OPPOSE ME, I'LL KILL YOU NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE!" and grabbed the scissors hidden within his booty shorts and aimed the dazzling blade to his sparkling kira kira emperor eye.
However before he could begin the totally satisfying process of clawing out his own eyeball, Kuroko had successfully pacified No. 2 by playing Justin Timberlake's 'Bringing Sexy Back' remix version from his phone. Just as they thought that No.2 would remain as passive as his owner he let out an evil 'Myehehehehe~' and began to quote the lines of the famous Aomine-cchi lobster "The only one who can pacify me, IS ME ALONE"
However this didn't stop the Kiseki no Sedai's fearsome and totally amazing leader. Akashi's scissors had barely grazed the cornea of his eye when No.2 made a quick dash and Kasamatsu kicked the scissors away.
"No Akashi! Bad Human!" No.2 scolded the red-haired basketball player like a child. Akashi, not used to being treated like a petulant child, began to weep manly tears.
"No. 2…" Kagami and Kuroko exclaimed in shock and awe of the dog's ability to make the fearless and psychotic leader cry for his scissors.
A/N: Well… that was… uh… progressive! XD
don't know whether or not if the story will continue or not… drop a review to suggest anything you'd like to see if I continue~
