Today I have decided to tell my husband a secret. I have been struggling with when to tell my husband. I know I have to tell him but I have never told anyone. We have been married for 3 months. He is the only man I have been with that makes me feel safe. He holds me in his arm when I am upset. He lets me sit in his lap and he knows things my best friend Abby doesn't know. This secret desire has been eating at me. Yesterday, I went to see him at work and a women was in his office talking to him. Yeah, I know it is not a big deal. I know he has female client and I don't have a problem with them. The only reason I was angary because she kept rubbing his arm. Anyway, he came home later than normal and assume it had something to do with had client. I stated to yell and scream at him about how I thought he loved me and how if he was not going to be faithful then l he should have married me. I hear him trying to tell me why he so late getting home but I was so angry that I did not care what he was saying. Then, I felt his hand rap around the back of my neck and look I my eye. I remember every word he said to me last night. He told me that he loved me and that he was late because he was waiting for a call from a client that lived in a different time zone. He also point out that he had called and text me at least four times. The man reason I am writing about this event is because this is the reason I must tell him the one major thing he does not know. When he grabbed my neck, I felt chill go down my spine. I hope he will understand. I need him to understand.
OCPG
Why did I agree to write in a journal for the first year of our marriage? The marriage counselor said it will help us get our frustrations out after we disagree. She said it would keep our marriage strong if we write down event that made us feel something. The only reason I stared writing in this thing is because I love my wife and I will anything to please here it is in my nature along with some other things. So, here we go. Yesterday, my wife swore I was cheating on her. I have never even thought of cheating on her. As soon as I walked in the house she stated going on and on about how she trusted me and how if I was going to cheat on her why did I marry her in the first place. I could not even get a word. So I grabbed her by the back of her neck. I did not grab her hard. I just need to get her attention I word never abuse my wife. That is the only way I knew how to get her attention. I do not regret grabbing her because it made her look in my eyes and listen. I thought see would be mad at me for doing it but she just apologized and said she had saw a client of mine touching my arm and she felt like I was not doing anything about it. Then, she had this idea that the reason is because there was something going on between us. I have not seen that side of her before.
FTG III